Please tell me the benefits of home schooling high school

[Mogster]

I would love to hear from people with experience. Why are you glad you chose to home school high school? How did it help your college-bound student achieve his/her goals? I am going to a family reunion in July where many of the parents are middle/upper school teachers and professionals ( many PhDs in this group). We have not seen them for some time, and I know they already think we are crazies for choosing to continue home schooling the high school years. I want to be prepared as possible so that I can educate them on the benefits of our choice. One of their children already told my son that he will never get into college without a diploma. My 11 year old son has huge academic hopes and it really took a lot to convince him this was not true. Another family has just spent several thousand dollars traveling the country visiting different colleges for their daughter. I can see traveling a lot to choose a graduate school, but we have no intention of traveling the globe for and undergrad school. I'm not really interested in their approval, but I do want to be as prepared and confident as possible for my children. Hopefully, my children's behavior, attitude, and love of learning will speak for itself and I will not have to say anything. Can you tell I'm a little nervous? Thanks in advance for your help!

[Jenny in Florida]

For my kids, it boils down to flexibility, opportunities to pursue passions and the freedom to move at your own pace.

 

I look at the kids we know who are in traditional high schools, and I'm always a little blown away by how much of their lives is ruled by the school schedule and homework. All of my son's three closest friends regularly miss non-school things (including church) because they need time to keep up with school assignments.

 

Meanwhile, my kids participate in lots of outside stuff, maintain a rigorous courseload, graduate early and still manage to sleep most nights.

 

Please don't misunderstand: Most of the kids we know who are in school are there at least in part because they want to be there. They like their schools and feel good about their lives. It's just not a lifestyle that appeals to us.

Edited June 25, 2012 by Jenny in Florida

[regentrude]

First of all: yes, homeschooled students CAN and do go to college, with a parent issues transcript and diploma. read a bit on these boards.

 

For us, the benefit of homeschooling high school is the same as the benefit of homeschooling at all: better academics. We home school solely for academic reasons, because our children's needs were not met in the one public school available in our town.

Other people see different benefits.

[Mom22ns]

I have only homeschooled high school for one year, so my views may be irrelevant here, but here is my .02 anyway.

 

We homeschool for academic reasons. My oldest is 2E, autistic spectrum and highly gifted. Neither one of these was well accommodated for in ps and the two together, well they just weren't close.

 

Homeschooling gives us flexibility. We are able to accelerate and push our kids in their strong areas and the areas they are most interested in (not necessarily the same). We also back off their weak areas choosing standard level courses and eliminating busy work to give more time for the others.

 

In addition to an academic environment that is stronger than our public schools, we also appreciate the social growth the kids have been able to achieve. They pick their friends from those who share common interests, instead of the person who sits by them even in class. Ds's social skills improved so much when we started homeschooling after pulling out of ps, I had several people ask what we had done!

 

Time would be another issue. Dd is a competitive gymnast. She spends 16 hours per week in the gym, 4-8:00, 4 nights per week. This makes ps terrible. If homework is piled on when she has gym, one has to give. There are plenty of hours in the week to do a rigorous academic schedule and gymnastics, but not in ps format.

 

As for college, you might consider joining the yahoo group HS2coll and look in their archives for the list of college acceptances this year. It is not a problem to get into college, even a selective college with a homeschool transcript. Almost every college has policies for homeschoolers now. Some require extra SAT2 tests, some require higher minimum scores on ACT or SAT, but most are very prepared and some even actively recruit homeschoolers.

 

Smile and nod at your reunion. Tell them homeschooling is going great. If they pry answer questions directly and honestly, but be succinct. Most people won't continue to push. My parents both held PhDs in education and worked in the ps system. My SIL is a high school math teacher. I understand having trepidations about what family will think. There is nothing wrong with being prepared to answer their questions, but don't let it overwhelm you.

 

btw, my sister tried to convince dd that she should go back to ps. She had her oldest dd tell mine how wonderful high school is, how much she will miss, they absolutely campaigned when we were together for several days one Christmas. I was livid and sure dd was going to fall for it. I have always told my kids they could go back if they wanted to and until that week, dd was keeping the possibility open. Their hard sell convinced her it wasn't the place for her and that she wouldn't go :lol:. Your ds can may surprise you by moving past their propaganda.

[Night Elf]

If anyone persists in knowing details, tell them you belong to a high school forums that supports a rigorous education. You've researched colleges and there are absolutely homeschoolers attending as long as you follow their suggestions. You are using those suggestions to follow their plan just like any regular school. You feel your courses will better prepare your students for college because they aren't held back by sad and dumbed down curriculum, easy grading to make sure everyone passes, minimal work assignments to make sure all students can handle them, or social deficiencies such as negative peer pressure. Schooling at home keeps the kids doing real world things while other kids are in school, and they'll be better at college because they won't feel scared because of how independent successful college students are.

 

It's hard when you're being pressed for answers. It can be a no win situation. If you don't answer the questions, they'll hound you because you're showing you aren't good enough. If you answer the questions, they just press on more. Maybe you'll get lucky and get super questions like 'but how will they learn to eat in a cafeteria?' :tongue_smilie:

[Lori D.]

I would love to hear from people with experience. Why are you glad you chose to home school high school? How did it help your college-bound student achieve his/her goals? I am going to a family reunion in July where many of the parents are middle/upper school teachers and professionals ( many PhDs in this group). We have not seen them for some time, and I know they already think we are crazies for choosing to continue home schooling the high school years. I want to be prepared as possible so that I can educate them on the benefits of our choice. One of their children already told my son that he will never get into college without a diploma. My 11 year old son has huge academic hopes and it really took a lot to convince him this was not true. Another family has just spent several thousand dollars traveling the country visiting different colleges for their daughter. I can see traveling a lot to choose a graduate school, but we have no intention of traveling the globe for and undergrad school. I'm not really interested in their approval, but I do want to be as prepared and confident as possible for my children. Hopefully, my children's behavior, attitude, and love of learning will speak for itself and I will not have to say anything. Can you tell I'm a little nervous? Thanks in advance for your help!

 

 

SO sorry to hear the lack of support -- and even outright misinformation -- about homeschooling from family. :( Unfortunately, it is pretty common. From the many threads I've seen on this topic, the best responses to these kinds of comments or questions seem to be: maintain a pleasant non-confrontational manner, thank them for their interest, and quickly change the subject (or, as it is called on these threads, "pass the bean dip").

 

Most of the time, people already have strong opinions and no amount of facts will change their minds. Politely and succinctly correct any misinformation (such as the "no diploma" comment). If they persist, gently but firmly make it clear your parenting/disciplining/educational/etc. choices for your children are not open for discussion: "Just as you have made the best choices for your children based on your research and your children's needs, so have we. It's wonderful we live in a country where we have so many options open to us to choose from, isn't it! More bean dip?" ;)

 

 

Below are some past threads discussing the benefits. Hope the topic just won't come up, and you have a wonderful reunion! Warmest regards, Lori D.

 

Why homeschool high school?

Please tell me again all the reasons why I should homeschool high school

Aside from academics (what are the benefits experienced from homeschooling high school

Private Christian school vs homeschool? (what are the benefits)

 

 

Some slightly tangential threads, but with some benefits mixed in:

How is homeschool high school different from public school?

Rethinking some areas (a theoretical discussion on how feasible is it to be able to teach all high school subjects at home)

Does anyone actually school their [high school] children completely at home?

How can you do a good job with high school and still have time for teaching youngers?

Poll: Do you like your job (of homeschooling)

What are you glad you did with your high school students?

Edited June 25, 2012 by Lori D.

[TammyS]

How I handle these things depends on my relationship to the people and my mood at the time. If I don't care much for them, or I've already had enough, or it's just the wrong phase of the moon....I'm likely to start giving them really inappropriate and unsolicited advice like "You need to make your kid get a hair cut" , "how can you let her wear low riders like that?", "You really should switch to Kotex, Tampax is so last century"...or a very blunt "mind your own business".

 

If I think they aren't totally obnoxious, or if I might want to like them later, I still don't answer them directly or justify myself. Instead, I put the onus on them and tell them that they need to look up the information on the long-term success of homeschooled students and to look up how many Ivy League schools are actually seeking out homeschooled students, and then they can call you to talk. The point being that they don't know enough about the subject to: have and opinion, carry on a conversation about it, or question you on it.

 

I also make it clear all of the things that I DON'T value, so there is no wasted discussion: prom (gag me), school sports, and school social life.

[Sebastian (a lady)]

Maybe I'm abnormal (correction, I am abnormal, maybe it carries over to education too), but I usually am reading 1-2 books about education. Right now, it's Five Easy Lessons, about teaching physics. So I might ask them if 75% of students are still having major conceptual errors at the end of a college physics course, how do they know that high school is providing the proper foundations?

 

My other tactic is to ask them what they would recommend in an area of their expertise. So if my bil were a military buff, I might ask him what books he'd recommend on WWI or ancient warfare. In other words, I try to coop them to be my helpers and supporters instead of detractors.

 

If pressed, bean dip still works.

 

I actually attended two workshops by Dr. Carol Reynolds, a professor emeritus of music at SMU. One of her presentations was about what she thought homeschoolers brought that traditional students didn't. The points included excitement/not being burned out, initiative, curiosity, and desire to learn.

[4wildberrys]

 

I also make it clear all of the things that I DON'T value, so there is no wasted discussion: prom (gag me), school sports, and school social life.

 

 

OK, this is my favorite part of your quote!! I wish I knew more people like you IRL----our small town is ALL ABOUT....prom (gag), school team sports (gag) AND the social life revolves around here on the ONE public school...:001_huh:

[Lori D.]

Maybe I'm abnormal (correction, I am abnormal, maybe it carries over to education too), but I usually am reading 1-2 books about education. Right now, it's Five Easy Lessons, about teaching physics. So I might ask them if 75% of students are still having major conceptual errors at the end of a college physics course, how do they know that high school is providing the proper foundations?

 

 

 

Oooo, shock-and-awe tactic! Like it! :D

[profmom]

I'm sorry! That's frustrating that they actively campaigned to your dd. I'm glad it wasn't effective, but still! That's rude.

 

It helps to have a couple of 20 second answers to questions that you anticipate -- because many people don't want to listen to more than that, plus longer answers to those same questions, in case some actually do want to listen. You might also go with some ideas for different conversation topics that you can start -- asking about their dc, asking advice for growing tomatoes, etc.

 

For us, we love that we can customize their classes, and we love what we're using for high school! We're definitely planning on college and hope to have academic scholarships. Other issues are that our family makes different choices for entertainment (music, movies, no video games...), and we think high school dating is pointless and more harmful than good. (No offense to others who choose to go ahead - we can agree to disagree, okay? :) ) Given that these are the probably the main conversation topics in high school and that even the schools get involved in promoting dating (dances and other events for couples), it makes sense for us to skip the social interaction of public school too.

 

(BTW, I'm sure that makes us sound so dull and protective, but my dc have lots of friends, probably more than they'd have if they were in school. Some friends go to school, but they have no desire to go themselves.)

 

I don't mention the cultural aspects when I'm talking with people who believe strongly in public school - lol! I'm not often asked by family to defend myself nowadays, but I would emphasize the customized program and strong academics. I've noticed that a mention that we do standardized testing every year is really reassuring to people who are skeptical :lol:;) - that and mentioning co-op or outside classes. It also helps that we are able to find outside activities for the areas where our kids have interests. These things address fears that others have, and they seem to back off if they see that those things are not issues in your case.

 

Still...you don't have to prove anything to anyone! I hope the info in this thread will help you to relax and have fun at the reunion.

[creekland]

For us it's better academics. I work in our local high school and have since 1999. It's what drove hubby and I to consider homeschooling. I simply do not see the academic foundation I want for my kids coming from graduates of our school. Instead, at school, I see kids focused on learning materials for a test, then promptly forgetting all they have memorized. They were memorizing, not truly learning. Teachers had to keep dumbing things down to let kids get good grades. State and school mandates cut into educational time causing gaps in material covered - important material. Kids who are completely capable of higher level academics learned they never needed to bat an eyelash and would have a 4.0, but then they'd go to college and literally flunk out due to being underprepared.

 

I wanted my guys to love learning and be challenged to their capability. I wanted them to be able to do basic math without a calculator. I wanted them to truly learn, not just memorize.

 

It worked well for my older two. Youngest opted to return to school for high school. I still cringe. He's enjoying himself, but his academics are lower than I would like. We're having to adjust college thoughts down for him - then I have to pray he'll step up to do the work there as he's one of those who can get a 4.0 (higher weighted) without doing a lick of thoughtful work at the level my school provides.

 

Hubby and I are thankful that I work there. Had we been "normal" parents we would have sent our offspring to school and just assumed they weren't top of the top academic types since their scores, etc, would have been lower. Middle son has an equally academically capable peer who was with him all through elementary school. By the end of high school, mine got accepted to higher level colleges with decent merit aid. His friend got accepted (with merit aid), but to a much lower level college. He got accepted to a couple of the same level, but couldn't afford to attend them due to no merit aid (and merit aid was available at these schools). Both will do ok... well, I say that, but his friend is NOT as academically prepared so it will be tougher for him, but I think he can step up to it. Mine has the better opportunities.

 

All of this depends upon the local school district.

 

Otherwise, I love the flexibility homeschooling offers. It's a real bummer being tied down to school schedules and the often strict rules. My youngest loves the socializing and how much "easier" it is. :glare: Nonetheless, for him, it's the path he needs and it's his life, not mine, so we let him continue and prod him to do some afterschooling to fill in gaps. It's also a good thing that his life path (even if homeschooling) is likely to lead him to lower levels of college for what he wants to do (environmental stuff). I'd fear if he wanted to be pre-med or an engineer. I have confidence that he'll do well if we get him into the right fit. I also know he'll have to step up to succeed due to that unprepared bit. It'd be worse if we didn't prod here at home.

[hswarden]

I don't mean to be snide or disrespectful, but if there are schooled students at the family gathering, they may be your best defense.

In the presence of the other pro-school adults, attempt a serious conversation with one or two of them.

[AK_Mom4]

DD18 homeschooled her senior year (just graduated!) so that she could have additional time to concentrate on her music and also so that she could take calculus AB and BC in one year.

 

Having more time for her own interests and being able to accelerate academic subjects is a pretty attractive option.