purplemama Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 My husband joined the Army as a Chaplain in September 2009 and is in Afghanistan for the second time since then. By the time he comes home he will have spent a total of 22 out of 36 months gone from home. I can't imagine how families have done this for ten or eleven years! I have always done school year-round, taking three or four week breaks a few times per year, but at this point I am exhausted and wondering if I am crazy to try to keep at it this summer. We are way behind where I want to be, but I realize we are homeschooling so I can have control over our schooling. I keep reminding myself that we are in the home stretch(hubby should be home in September), but I feel like I am going to be limping across the finish line! My question is, if you have or have had a deployed spouse while homeschooling, how have you handled schooling during deployment? If you got behind, were you been able to make up for it later? I have cut myself a lot of slack on housecleaning and have tasked my kids with most daily chores except cooking and loading the dishwasher and washing clothes--they empty the dishwasher, fold laundry, clean bathrooms, take care of our dogs, sweep, vacuum and dust, and my son cuts the grass. My kids have handled Dad being gone so much extremely well and they are prepared to do school through the summer. I really want to be able to take the whole month after he come home off, and that is why I feel like we need to troop on through the summer. I do not know many other military homeschoolers locally to ask. I need some perspective. Thanks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lauracolumbus Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 My dh was deployed for 15 months (3 mos. training, 12 mos. in Iraq). He got home about this time last year. My dc were almost identical to your dc's ages and genders when he deployed. Quite honestly, I just focused on math and Latin for the most part that year. They did a significant amount of reading. We did a lot of co-ops/extracurriculars b/c I wanted to keep them busy and their minds occupied w/their friends. I think they learned a lot w/their classes/fun stuff (although I did worry about how far behind they were getting). I don't regret it at all. We got through a difficult year unscathed, and I tried to make up for it this year. I, too, slacked off on the cooking/cleaning regimen (and it's hard to gear back up on that now). I strongly urge you to take it easy and enjoy the summer. Just do what you believe to be truly essential (and do the same during the month he is home). You'd be amazed at how much you can cut back on while your kids keep learning the core subjects. Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplemama Posted June 8, 2012 Author Share Posted June 8, 2012 Thanks, lauracolumbus. We usually only do math, science, and history during the summer, and art as we have time for it. This year, since we are behind, I was planning to keep up Latin because we have not finished, but we are at a good stopping point as we are about to begin dealing with the passive voice and I might like to delay that until a time when I feel more refreshed! Perhaps review, review, review over the summer via recitation would be better than plowing ahead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lauracolumbus Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 Review sounds perfect. Esp. if you're on the way to the pool! Enjoy this time. Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dm379 Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 I just pm'd you. But to answer your question, we school for shorter days but do a little bit every day. Sometimes it's just reading and math but it's something. And I cut out subjects that weren't core such as art and music. We took off the month of r&r and that put us behind so we aren't doing summer vacation. I figure it'll all work out in the end. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplemama Posted June 8, 2012 Author Share Posted June 8, 2012 I did plan for us being off for R&R, but other things over the course of the year have made us off schedule: my lack of sleep which makes for oh so little motivation, plus the fact that the first third of the deployment I was in physical therapy for a bulging disk in my neck and my daughter had a cast on her arm for six weeks which made everything slower school wise because we had to do EVERYTHING orally. (It was her right arm in the cast and she is right-handed). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nukeswife Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 My dh is on his 7th deployment (we will celebrate our 15th anniversary in 5 days) and this time has been gone almost a year now (which is pretty long for the Navy, but he had to report to the new ship for workups a few months before the official deployment and then it was extended) There are time where we got behind and we usually just work to make things up until he comes home if that will be in the summer. If it's in the middle of the school year we take the month off after he returns and just lengthen the school year as needed. The last two deployments have been really rough as many things that normally don't happen came up. The one in 2010 we had lots of major things break in the house and lost our 12 year old dog to cancer. This past deployment I found out my dad had cancer and more than likely won't make it to the end of this year. It's been hard some days to do much of anything, but the kids and I will work on our math and LA that we didn't finish over the next few months and will get as much done as we can before dh returns. Sometimes you just have to do what you can and let the rest go for the day. Many times I just let the housework go by the wayside and then every few weeks we'll have a "home ec" day and work on getting things done with the house. Luckily for this deployment my older kids have really stepped up and are doing quite a bit to help me around the house which is really nice. My dh just had his 17th year in service anniversary so this should be our last deployment until he retires, but you never know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hthnmamax2 Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 My DH isn't currently deployed, but he did come back from an 18 month deployment in February. During that deployment I had two unexpected surgeries, my Dad had a surgery that I had to be there for, the dog was hospitalized for a week, we were unexpectedly told we had to move and we had to put our house on the rental market all while he was deployed. I would love to say that my boys did at least Math and Science during that time. Nope. They read and watched History documentaries because I made the mistake of assuming they would be able to work a little more independently than they were able to do. :glare: We're currently trying to catch up by working through the Summer. I've discussed it with both the boys and we've all reached the same conclusion - even if it takes them extra time to finish high school, so what. The whole point to us homeschooling was for the boys to actually learn not just memorize and regurgitate. And, it's better than being over stressed or getting burned out trying to catch up and do a million things because at one point life sucked. DH has been in for almost 18 years and hopefully this upcoming deployment will be his last. But, that's hard to say because that's a few months from now and based on experience, the Navy will change their mind. The boys and I will be better prepared for this one though and they will be older and a little more mature and hopefully more independent. Hah! :lol: Take a deep breath, smile, and go at the pace you need to for your children. Also, feel free to shoot me a PM if you ever need to vent. The job of the military spouse is not an easy one and sometimes it's helpful to scream and holler to release the frustration. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplemama Posted June 8, 2012 Author Share Posted June 8, 2012 The main reason we are planning to take almost the whole month after dh comes home is that he will likely have a three week block leave, during which we will be traveling out of town for 10 days, and we NEVER get any school work done when Dad is at home! We have lots of stuff to do around the house as well, since we will more than likely be moving within months after he comes home, so we need to take advantage of his block leave to some maintenance done around the house. Thanks for the offer to vent, Beth. I may take you up on it. Since I am the chaplain's wife, I really don't vent to anyone; they vent to me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommytobees Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 (edited) Ouch!! We arent going through deployments right now, thank heavens, as Dh is on shore duty. But, in our 14.5 year marriage he has been deployed 8 times for (6-8 months) plus work-ups which are 2-6 weeks a piece before each deployment. At one point when Dd11 was a bay he had been gone for something along the lines of 30 of her 36 months. Of those 6 months he had not been home for more than 2 weeks at a time. So, to get to e point..... We have been married 174 months and he has been gone more than 80 of those months. I feel your pain. Having said that.........homeschooling. It was Easier! With smaller children. Seeing the ages of your kids that makes it a lot harder. In our house there are 3 things which are never ever neglected. 1) reading - you have to read books. 2) Math - you have to do math. And 3) Critical thinking - we are big believers in critical thinking. So. First off take a deep breath. Second, look at your "piles" of school work left of the year. What is *really* critical for the rest of this summer? Start dropping the NOT necessities. What can be stopped for right now and restarted in the fall? Don't burn out right before he comes back. Edited June 8, 2012 by mommytobees Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommytobees Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 Ack. My cat keeps posting for me..... Anyway.... Don't try to do everything. Drop to the basics. Get control of your household and Go Have Fun with the kids this summer. Kris, who is going to go and throddle her cat now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sneezyone Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 (edited) DH is in the middle of workups now, his third deployment starts this winter, so I'm moving with the kids to be closer to my mom. We'll be separated for 15-18 months and we've been married 14 years. Where's that hair pulling smiley when you need it? We don't homeschool full time but do summer school and afterschool during the year. I second (or third?) the other tips. If you can, hire someone to come and clean. Even if it's only once every two weeks, it's worth every penny and then some! Get into a routine. I get the kids up early and have a schedule for the day with lots of time outdoors (fewer messes to clean up). Send everyone to their rooms early! Bedtime in the summer is 8p sharp (I have littles) so I can enjoy a glass of wine and a good book in peace! Keep the studies simple, quick and fun. We will focus on math, history and reading this summer. That's it. Take advantage of childcare offers and take care of yourself. It's amazing what an afternoon of mani/pedi/lunch and movie can do to improve your perspective. :grouphug: Edited June 8, 2012 by Sneezyone Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 Not currently, but we have BTDT. Hang in there. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplemama Posted June 9, 2012 Author Share Posted June 9, 2012 Thanks for all the words of wisdom ladies! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamrachelle Posted June 9, 2012 Share Posted June 9, 2012 My DH is finishing up a one year deployment this month... our 6th one... Want a :grouphug:? I've got plenty of those floating around and lots and lots of sympathy. Hang in there... and give yourself permission to take the month off during his block leave, no matter where you are in your curriculum. You will all need the chance to reconnect and rest and just... breathe. Glad you are on the home stretch... you're doing great, Momma.:patriot: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplemama Posted June 10, 2012 Author Share Posted June 10, 2012 Thanks, Rachelle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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