Rant, vent, whine, CC

[Tarheel Heather]

You know we moved in March.. We didn't exactly have time to seek counsel and pray about where we going. Dh had ONE day to decide and we chose to be closest to family. Friends asked if we sought counsel.

 

I hear about others in our neighborhood whose houses have sold, why can't ours sell? Is it because we didn't seek counsel and is it because we didn't exactly pray about it. I could even ask are we even supposed to be here? Is dh even supposed to have THIS job. How do you know? How do you know what you are led to do, where to go. Or do you just do it? Obviously we just did it. I have been asked, " Are you sure that's where you are supposed to be?" Well it's too late now.

 

Dh isn't exactly having a cake walk of a time, he is struggling with trying to make things the way he wants them. I am struggling with the whole trying to make things work. The kids are struggling with issues they haven't had to deal with before. Maybe we weren't supposed to be here, but then where are we supposed to be?

 

How do you know? That is all I want, why can't there be a post it note left on the fridge saying what I am supposed to choose that day? Why can't things be revealed more clearly? I am trying so hard not to discouraged but I still have that feeling of why on earth did we move? We were all so happy.

 

Thanks for 'listening'.

[WTMindy]

You know we moved in March.. We didn't exactly have time to seek counsel and pray about where we going. Dh had ONE day to decide and we chose to be closest to family. Friends asked if we sought counsel.

 

I hear about others in our neighborhood whose houses have sold, why can't ours sell? Is it because we didn't seek counsel and is it because we didn't exactly pray about it. I could even ask are we even supposed to be here? Is dh even supposed to have THIS job. How do you know? How do you know what you are led to do, where to go. Or do you just do it? Obviously we just did it. I have been asked, " Are you sure that's where you are supposed to be?" Well it's too late now.

 

Dh isn't exactly having a cake walk of a time, he is struggling with trying to make things the way he wants them. I am struggling with the whole trying to make things work. The kids are struggling with issues they haven't had to deal with before. Maybe we weren't supposed to be here, but then where are we supposed to be?

 

How do you know? That is all I want, why can't there be a post it note left on the fridge saying what I am supposed to choose that day? Why can't things be revealed more clearly? I am trying so hard not to discouraged but I still have that feeling of why on earth did we move? We were all so happy.

 

Thanks for 'listening'.

I'm so sorry!! The hardest times are those times when you are kind of in-between, which is where you are. I think the post-it note that God is leaving for you right now is "Trust me even in the in-between times!" This is the place that often we learn the most dependence on God. It will all happen in his timing. But, that doesn't make it any easier. It isn't too late to pray now and ask for guidance now. I'm praying for you now!

[elegantlion]

I was thinking about your situation this morning. :grouphug::grouphug: I'm sorry you're so frustrated. I hope you get an unexpected blessing today.

[Amy loves Bud]

Heather,

 

Gently, I do believe you are overthinking this whole thing. Followers of Christ are not promised a perfect, comfortable, painfree life. We live in a broken world and, sometimes, things aren't perfect. But I don't think God read the Pearls' book (couldn't resist) and then decided it's a good idea to wait till you slip up and then swat you.

 

I'm so sorry this move hasn't panned out like you'd hoped, but it's been a short time, so hang in there. I'll be praying that your new home ends up being your dream home!

[Tammyla]

:grouphug: Hang in there, Heather. This is a difficult time for so many trying to sell a home. I hope it sells soon.

[Tarheel Heather]

Heather,

 

Gently, I do believe you are overthinking this whole thing. Followers of Christ are not promised a perfect, comfortable, painfree life. We live in a broken world and, sometimes, things aren't perfect. But I don't think God read the Pearls' book (couldn't resist) and then decided it's a good idea to wait till you slip up and then swat you.

 

I'm so sorry this move hasn't panned out like you'd hoped, but it's been a short time, so hang in there. I'll be praying that your new home ends up being your dream home!

 

I do analyze everything! I have just heard so many times- are you sure you were supposed to there. Well how am supposed to know. Sounded good at the time. Our choices were Alabama, Kentucky, and Tenn. We chose here since it ended in Carolina, close to family, a three hour trip up the road.

 

I know situations aren't perfect, I guess I just don't like being plucked up from my happy spot.

 

Thanks Amy! And I still don't have a clue as to who the Pearl's are!

[H.S. Burrow]

I'm so sorry!! The hardest times are those times when you are kind of in-between, which is where you are. I think the post-it note that God is leaving for you right now is "Trust me even in the in-between times!" This is the place that often we learn the most dependence on God. It will all happen in his timing. But, that doesn't make it any easier. It isn't too late to pray now and ask for guidance now. I'm praying for you now!

 

 

:iagree: This could have been me 2 years ago! DH had to take a promotion which involved a move and the selling of our home. He left for the new job in September and came home every weekend until we found a place that we could rent in February....our home did not sell until May...but it DID sell and for our asking price. The home we rented was only a 2 bedroom and the kids had to share the largest room (which was as large as two rooms, just without the wall in the middle)...they were NOT happy at first and there were many struggles, but 2 years later - they are closer and friends!

 

Trust in God and everything WILL happen the way it should in His time, not ours.

[genie]

I remember hearing a sermon years ago that had a huge effect on my spiritual walk at the time. I'm probably going to do a terrible job at paraphrasing, but hopefully you'll get the gist of it. It was about Christians who almost become paralyzed over praying for the next step. The preacher started quoting scripture about Paul, and how when he finished in one town, he got up and went to the next town. He didn't spend days or weeks praying about where he should go next. He got up and went, trusting that if the direction he was heading was not the "right" one, God would stop him and show him the right way.

 

The basic idea is that we are given this life to live, and we are allowed to make choices and decisions. That is part of the freedom of free will. The fact that things are tough for you right now isn't an indication that you somehow made the wrong choice. It's just a set of obstacles that, once you've gotten past, will make you a stronger person. :grouphug:

[Kelli in TN]

Maybe you are being tried with fire (ouch) and you will come forth as shining gold?

 

It is harder to trust in God during the shadowy times isn't it?

 

You probably should have moved to Tennessee. West Tennessee, that is. You would have me. And the Pearls are Tennesseans, too!! Oh joy!

 

I am kidding. I imagine you are right there in the palm of God's hand where you belong.

[Amy loves Bud]

I do analyze everything! I have just heard so many times- are you sure you were supposed to there. Well how am supposed to know. Sounded good at the time. Our choices were Alabama, Kentucky, and Tenn. We chose here since it ended in Carolina, close to family, a three hour trip up the road.

 

I know situations aren't perfect, I guess I just don't like being plucked up from my happy spot.

 

Thanks Amy! And I still don't have a clue as to who the Pearl's are!

 

Yeah, I'm in the analyze everything camp, too, so I totally get where you are coming from on this one!

 

Maybe a nice adult beverage would help?

[Tarheel Heather]

Thank you everyone, and I'm on my third cup of coffee. Maybe I need to cut back on the caffeine!

[Tarheel Heather]

Maybe you are being tried with fire (ouch) and you will come forth as shining gold?

 

It is harder to trust in God during the shadowy times isn't it?

 

You probably should have moved to Tennessee. West Tennessee, that is. You would have me. And the Pearls are Tennesseans, too!! Oh joy!

 

I am kidding. I imagine you are right there in the palm of God's hand where you belong.

 

We would have been somewhere south of Knoxville, in da mountains. Although for months we thought dh was going to be in Crossville.

[Tarheel Heather]

I'm so sorry!! The hardest times are those times when you are kind of in-between, which is where you are. I think the post-it note that God is leaving for you right now is "Trust me even in the in-between times!" This is the place that often we learn the most dependence on God. It will all happen in his timing. But, that doesn't make it any easier. It isn't too late to pray now and ask for guidance now. I'm praying for you now!

 

 

Thank you Mindy!

[Tarheel Heather]

I was thinking about your situation this morning. :grouphug::grouphug: I'm sorry you're so frustrated. I hope you get an unexpected blessing today.

 

I think my blessing was yesterday when I finally got all the stripped screws out of the cabinets! Baby steps!

[HomeOnTheRanch]

:grouphug:

When my kids were little they asked permission for or received guidance on every little thing. As they've grown, I want them to make their own decisions. Of course, those decisions are still under my supervision. If I see them making a truly horrible choice, I'll let them know. Otherwise, I think it is a healthy part of growing up. The older kids are at the point now that I don't want them asking me if they may take a shower, clean the chicken coop or do anything that they know what/how/when to do. They know me and what I expect of them.

 

It is still right for me to constantly seek God's will for my life (I wouldn't want it any other way), but I don't stop and ask Him if I should wash the dishes or go to church, or and other stuff like that. There have been times when He has worked it out so I haven't been able to do my plans. I see it was Him leading, and I'm grateful. Sometimes there are *big* decisions that need to be made. Sometimes we specifically ask Him for guidance, other times we don't. Most of those times I think that I/we made the decision that He wanted us to make. The times that our decision would have been truly detrimental to us, He let us know, in His time, that we needed to make a change.

 

Take comfort that even the big patriarchs in the Old Testament goofed up sometimes (I was going to give a few examples, but basically, ALL OF THEM!), but God still worked through the circumstances. Seek His will for the here and now. You can do nothing about the past except learn from it.

 

All that said, maybe God has/had a purpose for your current move. Perhaps it is His will that you are where you are at this point. Just because you don't see that light at the end of the tunnel doesn't mean it isn't there...maybe there is a bend in the track near the end.

 

Praying for you!

 

Romans 8:28

[Tarheel Heather]

I remember hearing a sermon years ago that had a huge effect on my spiritual walk at the time. I'm probably going to do a terrible job at paraphrasing, but hopefully you'll get the gist of it. It was about Christians who almost become paralyzed over praying for the next step. The preacher started quoting scripture about Paul, and how when he finished in one town, he got up and went to the next town. He didn't spend days or weeks praying about where he should go next. He got up and went, trusting that if the direction he was heading was not the "right" one, God would stop him and show him the right way.

 

The basic idea is that we are given this life to live, and we are allowed to make choices and decisions. That is part of the freedom of free will. The fact that things are tough for you right now isn't an indication that you somehow made the wrong choice. It's just a set of obstacles that, once you've gotten past, will make you a stronger person. :grouphug:

 

Thanks Genie!

[Sharon in SC]

I don't know if this will be any encouragement to you but.....I can honestly say that we *did* pray about our move, to this day I feel we did what the Lord was directing us to do, and yet, today, I wonder, "Lord, will the challenge(s) of this move ever end?!" as I watch the $7K new AC go into the new to us house and the old house remains on the market. ;-{

 

All I know to stand on is what I believe the Lord spoke to my heart early in the venture when I believe I heard Him say, "It was my will for the Israelites to leave Egypt and go to the Promised Land. It wasn't to be an easy journey. I simply called them to trust Me."

 

In your case, I hope to encourage you with this - God's Word says He will never forsake those who are on their knees. While you may not be able to say that you covered your move in prayer, if you have a heart *for* Him in your lives, I believe He is always at work causing *all* things to work together for the good of His people. As a child of God, I believe all things are before Him. He will guide you and direct you, counsel you and watch over you, instruct you and show you the way you are to go!!

 

hang in there, dear friend, and keep looking up! Sharon

[Sharon in SC]

IIt was about Christians who almost become paralyzed over praying for the next step. The preacher started quoting scripture about Paul, and how when he finished in one town, he got up and went to the next town. He didn't spend days or weeks praying about where he should go next. He got up and went, trusting that if the direction he was heading was not the "right" one, God would stop him and show him the right way.

 

 

 

:iagree: This is what I was speaking to in my post when I wrote, "It's all before God." As his children, we have his spirit *IN* us to guide us each day whether it's a matter of deciding whether or not to purchase a pair of shoes at the department store (using His resources) or whether or not to move. Certainly, we tend to take the bigger issues of life directly before Him in concerted prayer but that doesn't mean that He's not right there to guide us even when we don't. ("Whether you turn to the right or the left you will hear a still, small voice behind you saying, "This is the way, walk ye in it.")

[Sharon in SC]

Just because you don't see that light at the end of the tunnel doesn't mean it isn't there...maybe there is a bend in the track near the end.

 

Praying for you!

 

Romans 8:28

 

Hey, Heather, here's to our hoping to turn a bend in our respective tracks just to see the light at the end of the tunnel SOON! :D

[Tarheel Heather]

Hey, Heather, here's to our hoping to turn a bend in our respective tracks just to see the light at the end of the tunnel SOON! :D

 

Thank you Sharon!

[Soph the vet]

I remember someone on Dobson talking about moving and how it is a "crisis" for the mom of the house for the first year. I can say that was true for me when we moved four years ago (and it was only 4 miles). The attachments to the neighborhood was so strong that we went back there weekly to play at the park and look at our old house...from afar :(. Things are quite better now and we love some of our new neighbors. I'm guessing once your house sells that the stress level will go down. Just take one day at a time and "pray without ceasing" about anything that is troubling you.

[Mom2legomaniacs]

We would have been somewhere south of Knoxville, in da mountains. Although for months we thought dh was going to be in Crossville.

 

Do you know how close to me you would have been? Wait, that may not be a positive from your side of things:tongue_smilie:.

[Mom2legomaniacs]

We have moved a couple of times. I was not happy about either of them right away. But, one thing that I prayed for and was given was the gift of knowledge. I was shown why I was where I was at that time. I know we were supposed to be in IL when we were. No doubts. Now, I realize that we did have to move. And because we are now in TN in a place that I NOW love. Didn't at the get go though. It does take time. It is really hard in the interim though. I pray that you will settle in and that maybe you can find out why you are where you are right now. It helped me a great deal to look back and know that where I am is exactly where I am supposed to be. I pray you can find some peace dear. And if not, E. TN is really nice;).

[Tarheel Heather]

Do you know how close to me you would have been? Wait, that may not be a positive from your side of things:tongue_smilie:.

 

For the months of Nov. and Dec., we thought we were headed that way, something fell through and nope didn't happen! Would've been fun!:D

[Scarlett]

I'm wondering about 'friends' who pose such a question as 'are you sure you are suppose to be here?' :confused: What is the point of asking you such a question. As you said it is too late now!

 

Having an unsold house is very very stressful. I think you will feel a lot better when that is resolved.

[Remudamom]

Bless your heart.

 

IMO- God is sovereign, and since you did move that was His will, because if it wasn't His will it wouldn't have happened. But maybe some struggles, doubts and questioning are His will too, in order for you to grow, stretch and learn.

 

Still sorta sucks though doesn't it? At least you're close to family....right???

[Remudamom]

We have moved a couple of times. I was not happy about either of them right away. But, one thing that I prayed for and was given was the gift of knowledge. I was shown why I was where I was at that time. I know we were supposed to be in IL when we were. No doubts. Now, I realize that we did have to move. And because we are now in TN in a place that I NOW love. Didn't at the get go though. It does take time. It is really hard in the interim though. I pray that you will settle in and that maybe you can find out why you are where you are right now. It helped me a great deal to look back and know that where I am is exactly where I am supposed to be. I pray you can find some peace dear. And if not, E. TN is really nice;).

 

 

You are in E. TN so that when I keep getting lost in Memphis and heading in that direction I'll have somewhere to stop.

[Mom2legomaniacs]

You are in E. TN so that when I keep getting lost in Memphis and heading in that direction I'll have somewhere to stop.

 

Would it be bad of me to kind of hope that you do get lost and end up on my doorstep?:D

[sassenach]

and I just had to come back and find it.

 

Last year, we left our home of 8 years in Florida. We knew that God was calling us to a new ministry in California. It was really clear that this is where we were supposed to be. Oh, has it been SO hard. I never dreamed that we'd have as many obstacles as we have. This includes, our house taking over 6 months to sell (and us taking a loss on it), less than ideal circumstances at the church, us not getting into a permanent home for 5 months, resistance from key volunteers within our new ministry, the list goes on.

 

Yes, so many times I've questioned whether we made a wrong turn somewhere. My husband reminded me one day that God doesn't call people into things that are easy. Look at the old testament, it's one story after another about people being called INTO very hard circumstances. Ever so slowly, one by one, those things that have been plaguing us are turning around. I'm not going to lie- this does not feel like home. yet. I miss Florida terribly. Mostly, I miss our friends. I miss how simple our life was. Maybe not at the end, but somewhere in the middle, there was a predictability and simplicity to our days. There were so many things that I just didn't have to think about. Now, I'm working to get new doctors, new therapists, new dentists, new grocery stores, new softball leagues, new, new, new. I'm really kind of tired of having to work so hard to figure out what was effortless before. Ah, look at that, I've hijacked your thread.

 

Back to the point. I've seen God provide in tangible ways, because he's been given the chance. When our lives were simple and predictable, I feel like we were playing double dutch and He was just waiting to jump in. We're in ministry, so our whole lives revolve around serving God, but sometimes He has to let us fall so He can serve us. I've seen in little and big ways, how WE fit into His plan here. Not just for our benefit, but for us to serve those around us. It continually amazes me how God is working on so many levels at once. He's never just doing one thing. He has umpteen different plans, all involving us in some way-big or small, all in different stages. His ways are SO NOT my ways.

 

So sister, let me encourage you. If it's hard, it probably means you made the right decision. When you follow Him and not your flesh, He's probably going to call you into something challenging. He knew what situation you were going to be put in (having to make a quick decision) and He also knew which one you'd choose. Believe me, if you were supposed to go somewhere else, he would have made that clear. He always does.

 

And to your friends, you might want to refer them to Job. I think he had a couple of friends that were like minded. It may be enlightening....

 

(((HUGS))))

[FlockOfSillies]

the hard stuff is the very reason you're there? Go read James chapter 1 and chew on what he says about trials and their purpose.

 

You made the best decision you could. You made a choice that wasn't violating Scripture in any way, right? The housing market is tough for sellers all over the country right now. You're not exactly being singled out.

 

Sit back and trust God's timing and sovereignty. I mean, it's not like He's slapping His forehead saying, "Doh! They moved there! They shoulda talked to so-and-so first. Now what am I gonna do? They've messed up all my plans! Well, I'll show them Who's Boss!"

[Sharon in SC]

Sit back and trust God's timing and sovereignty. I mean, it's not like He's slapping His forehead saying, "Doh! They moved there! They shoulda talked to so-and-so first. Now what am I gonna do? They've messed up all my plans! Well, I'll show them Who's Boss!"

 

:iagree: :lol: Praise the Lord we serve a Mighty God who loves us so very dearly!

[DB in NJ]

Heather, I'm sorry :grouphug:

 

Regardless of whether you were "supposed" to be where you are, you're there. It's kind of like my marriage -- neither one of us were saved when we got married, and we feel like we definitely weren't supposed to get married. But we did. And as our pastor told us, "It may not have been God's will for you to get married, but now that you are, it certainly is His will that you STAY married." Kind of grow where you're planted type advice.

 

BTW, we're very happily married now. Not one complaint! The Lord has blessed us immeasurably, and I'm sure He'll do the same for you.

[1bassoon]

Oh, ((((((((Heather))))))))) -

 

I just want to come get you and take you out for tea (southern and sweet, of course) and encourage you -

 

I could have written your post.

 

I won't type all the details, but we moved 1100 miles only to have the rug yanked from under us. In the biggest way. . . . . . . . I can't even begin to explain the hurt and the betrayal. . . . . . .

 

But God is faithful. He is Who He is. Don't second guess yourself - just obey where you are.

 

One thing that helped us tremendously - our pastor preached a sermon about following God's will. You know, do I move here or there? Do I marry him or him? etc. etc. He pointed out that the puritans didn't have ONE sermon on that subject. You can serve God just as well in the Army or Navy, kwim?

 

So tending towards that kind of thinking is spirtual navel gazing, imho.

 

BUT - we are called to obey what is revealed in God's Word. Are you living a life of gratitude? Are you loving your husband and your children? I'm pretty sure you know those "express" commands - :001_smile:

 

This probably comes across as too preachy, but oh, honey I will PRAY for you as I pray that our awesome, holy God would enable ME to live for His glory, no matter what the circumstance or trial.

 

One more ((((((((((((())))))))))))