lisamarie Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 My DS8 seems to be depressed lately and I'm not sure why. I've tried talking to him, my DH has tried talking to him, he says nothing is wrong. Yet he cries at the drop of a hat, wanders around bored, and acts unhappy. Today we went to the park and he spent the whole time moping around. When I asked him what was going on, he said that he just wanted to be alone. I have a few ideas but I don't want to ask because I don't want to put ideas in his head. He's gotten a TON of outside time in the last few weeks thanks to our great weather, so it's not from being cooped up in the house. I want to help him but I'm not sure what to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peaceful Isle Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 Since you said there are no real underlying issues, it sounds like what my dd had. This is the age when they start, well...not puberty, maybe pre-puberty? My dd 9 went through it, and my dd 7 is starting into it. They are more emotional, cry at the drop of a hat, and are really sensitive. It will die down soon, hopefully ;) The kiddos are changing, getting older, getting more emotions, the whole bit. I was just a little more understanding and calm with my dd. Let her know I cared, gave her a little alone time. She is out of it now. As children, their moods will change, come and go, get better or worse. It's all part of the journey. Now, if this kind of thing continues into 6 months or more, I would have it checked into. Big hugs:grouphug: and I hope it turns out ok for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lisamarie Posted March 17, 2012 Author Share Posted March 17, 2012 I was so tempted to ask him if he had PMS, but I didn't want to explain what that meant. I didn't think he was old enough to get hormonal shifts, but what do I know? He's my oldest.:tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PollyOR Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 My girls started pre-puberty around eight years old. That is definitely a possibility. I would continue observing so you can track any changes. If you do decide to get help, just know that it takes awhile to get the ball rolling. When my dd was 12 and we knew she was depressed, we first took her to her pediatrician. At that time, the average time to be on a waiting list to get into counseling with a psychologist was five months. After a couple of months of counseling she was prescribed medication. It isn't a fast process. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trilliums Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 Ds went through a whole "what is the meaning of life?" phase around then. We had just started homeschooling and I was worried it was partially due to that (He was dyslexic and struggling in ps. He felt that something was wrong with him and hence he couldn't cope in ps). We talked about many issues, explored a lot of questions (including talking to his grandad, which helped him a lot!) and I started to give him cod liver oil. I planned on taking him to a doctor if he didn't who signs of improvement. I think the cod liver oil had the most dramatic effect. Within a few weeks his outlook showed a dramatic shift. He still takes omega3s, but just from time to time now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lisamarie Posted March 17, 2012 Author Share Posted March 17, 2012 We have an appointment with a child psych in May for gifted testing, so if I don't see a change by then, I'll also bring this up. DS is allergic to fish/shellfish, so I've been leery of trying cod liver oil. Maybe flax? I do have some of that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ester Maria Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 That is an awkward age. A lot of intermittent silence / "meaning of life" / sensitivity / depression of spirits. They are growing up, their emotions are intensifying, and they have no language yet to describe what exactly it is. As hard as it may be on you, I would try to downplay it and not make it an issue lest it become an issue, "suggested" by you. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Negin Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 As hard as it may be on you, I would try to downplay it and not make it an issue lest it become an issue, "suggested" by you.:grouphug: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: I also want to add that unless something goes for an extended period of time and is obviously unreasonably prolonged, etc. - our dc need to learn resilience and strength. Yes, we can and should lead and guide them to healthier, more positive approaches. But there will come a time when they need to learn to deal with things when we won't be around to help fix everything for them. Hope I'm not sounding too harsh or offensive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lisamarie Posted March 17, 2012 Author Share Posted March 17, 2012 We had just started homeschooling and I was worried it was partially due to that (He was dyslexic and struggling in ps. He felt that something was wrong with him and hence he couldn't cope in ps). Yes, this is one of my concerns. We pulled him out of school over Christmas break (he was homeschooled for 2 years and then did a semester in school and it didn't work out well due to academics), so I am a little concerned it could be from that. Or maybe due to lack of friends in the neighborhood and being bored--I do try to arrange playdates weekly if I can and he does a coop class every week. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellers Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 One of my DDs became extremely depressed when she was 8 or 9. It was horrible, she didn't care about anything, nothing excited her, she would cry a lot (she didn't know why she was crying), and she would just sit like a lump on the couch. I took her to a child psychiatrist and he diagnosed her as being depressed and put her on medication. Ignoring her pain would not have made it go away. She was deeply depressed - a chemical imbalance in her brain. She didn't have problems she needed to talk out, she needed medication. Last year, she was off her antidepressant and had a relapse. She ended up in the hospital. Thankfully, she's doing wonderful now! Depression isn't something to mess around with. If you think he's depressed because of learning disabilities, take him to a therapist. Sometimes having someone to talk to can make all the difference. If he has major depression, he needs to see a child psychiatrist. I hope you get this figured out. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woolybear Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 Is it possible there is an underlying medical issue that you aren't aware of? The first thing that came to my mind is when ds had Lyme disease. He was 8 at the time. The first thing we noticed were huge behavioral changes and then depression as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 I agree with the above poster regarding medication if the child is truly depressed - two of my three of my four kids have had varying degrees of depression, and Celexa (or generic version) has been used, as needed, by them. Our pediatric neuro says it is NOT one of the drugs that can cause worse symptoms in kids - it is a different class of drug from the problem ones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JessReplanted Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Is he involved in an activity? We signed my son up for swimming when he turned 8. He goes 3x a week and it is great exercise! He enjoys it and feels good about himself when he learns to do something new. It also gives him more of a chance to be around other kids. At this point in our lives, I feel like he needs swimming. We are all happier when he is going regularly. (And he is not a hyperactive kid at all.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyfaithe Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Is it possible there is an underlying medical issue that you aren't aware of? The first thing that came to my mind is when ds had Lyme disease. He was 8 at the time. The first thing we noticed were huge behavioral changes and then depression as well. My ds was depressed with Lyme as well. As he heals, he is no longer depressed. Also, if there are food allergies, he can be having a reaction to something. My dd has terrible allergies that always effect her behavior. Faithe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripe Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Is he involved in an activity? We signed my son up for swimming when he turned 8. He goes 3x a week and it is great exercise! He enjoys it and feels good about himself when he learns to do something new. It also gives him more of a chance to be around other kids. At this point in our lives, I feel like he needs swimming. We are all happier when he is going regularly. (And he is not a hyperactive kid at all.) I second this, in fact, I was just watching a show about the placebo effect on 60 Minutes and the researcher said for mild and moderate depression, antidepresseants have not been shown to work more than placebo (though for serious depression they do) -- in the UK they are now advicating exercise. I found this startling. My kids have also enjoyed swimming. The more chances they get to play, esp outside, the genuinely happier they look. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Negin Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 I second this, in fact, I was just watching a show about the placebo effect on 60 Minutes and the researcher said for mild and moderate depression, antidepresseants have not been shown to work more than placebo (though for serious depression they do) -- in the UK they are now advicating exercise. I found this startling.My kids have also enjoyed swimming. The more chances they get to play, esp outside, the genuinely happier they look. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Do you know if he happens to be on the "extreme" end of introversion/extroversion? I ask because if he is, if he needs interaction to renew or if he needs solitude, and isn't getting those, it can present as depression. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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