Ottakee Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Just thinking of this last night as dh's parents have been ill and in and out of the hospital a lot. FIL has end stage kidney failure and is on dialysis 3 times a week, is legally blind, has had multiple heart attacks, just had 1/2 lung removed due to lung cancer, etc. and on and on. MIL is a kidney transplant patient and recently had 2 intestinal infections that hospitalized her. Dh and I are running ragged as he is the only living child (his other sibling, a brother was murdered 18 years ago). His dad is an only child with no extended family and his mother's siblings aren't able to help. Just got to thinking though of what dh and I will do someday when we become older and need help. We have 3 special needs children, likely none will marry and have children. One might drive at some point but likely the other 2 will never drive......or even be able to live on their own. I told my friend last night that she could take care of me.........but she is 11 years older so we will see :-) Anyone else think of this? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie Smith Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 We have two boys, no special needs - who knows what the future holds with them. The future plans involve professional care, a nice old age home - or the new fun future-istic old age home. I of course hope my boys visit often. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Anyone else think of this? Yes, more than I should. :tongue_smilie: My dh and I both have long term care insurance policies, legal documents up to date, etc. (That's a really fun afternoon...sitting around a conference table at a law office and letting them know if you want oxygen, feeding tubes, etc.) As the saying goes, we're hoping for the best but planning for the worst. :grouphug:I'm so sorry that you and your dh are having such a difficult time now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 My parents are in an assisted living type place. They currently are in the independent area, but they have paid in so that they will have long term care if needed. My concern is the distance. They are 2,000 miles away. Moving here would be very costly as they would lose out on what they have paid into there. Not sure they could even afford it. As for Dh and I needing assistance.....no idea. It will so depend on where my kids are, etc.... Dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chiguirre Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 Good topic and one that haunts me sometimes. Luckily my parents bought long term care insurance and my sister lives a couple of hours from them. My in-laws have 5 sons so we can share the burden. I worry about dd. She'll have to be GW's guardian and keep an eye on Geezle. We'll buy long term care insurance, but she'll probably be the only fully capable adult to take us to doctor's appointments and help us understand. Geezle may be able to drive, he reads well enough for the test already and can ride a bike responsibly so I do have some hope that he'll get there. I'm not alone in this situation, a lot of my asd mom friends have all or all but one of their kids on the spectrum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarreymere Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 I can see my kids all arguing and expressing different opinions and getting frustrated with each other but not wanting to let us know they disagree about something. That bothers me. As for us, well I've done per diem at our county home and it isn't a bad place. Our family doctor is actually the main doctor there. They have assisted living too. Dh works in human services so we don't have the income to invest in anything like long term care insurance, but on the plus side working in human services means he knows the system. We would be very content with very little, also. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 I am in the process of trying to get my parents to move closer to me. My mom is on board and wants to be in the same neighborhood. I would love that. It would make so easy to casually check in on them or really be with them if it is needed. My dad will be 80 and is in perfect health. He doesn't really want to move, but knows it would be better to move now rather than later out of neccessity. All of his friends have moved or gone to assisted living. I hope the example I am setting for my kids will mean they will do the same for me one day. My youngest dd has a servant's heart and wants to become a nurse. So I naturally think she will be the best candidate for us. My middle dd hates to help and gets scared around sick or injured people - I don't think she will be reliable. My son, really it will depend on his wife... I have been thinking about this a lot; thanks for giving me the place to think aloud. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterPan Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 Well honestly, I think it's an argument for why it's so important to make your own health a priority. Might not be financially possible or timewise easy or whatever, but that's what I think. I made my kids a priority, sacrificed my own health, and now I'm back to working on it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.