SuperDad Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I have been puzzling over this question for ages. :glare: Specifically as it applies to myself... I am friendly, loudmouthed, and I LOVE performing (I worked part-time in an improv troupe before becoming inundated with kids). However, I also really enjoy reading, just sitting thinking and turning inside myself (if that makes any sense???). If given the choice between working alone and working in a group - I would choose working alone, hands down. I have naturally poor social skills, which have taken a lot of practice to refine (and are still annoyingly weak). However... part of my dislike of being around people stems from my mood disorder, so that adds some spice to the mix. So, what think the Hive? In my situation, and in general. Is it truly possible to be naturally introverted and simultaneously outgoing? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AvasMom Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yep! This describes me very well too (but no mood disorder here). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SailorMom Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I am an introvert, but I enjoy people. I just have to recharge after spending time with a group. One on one I'm usually fine for longer periods. Introverted does not equal shy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momof3littles Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yes, I think it is possible. I was always confused about the introvert/extrovert thing, but the biggest clue for me is that introverts recharge by being alone mostly. I enjoy getting together with people, I'm very talkative, maybe not the most outgoing, but I am not shy. However, I find being in large groups or attending a party very, very draining. I enjoy it, but then I need to retreat and recharge by myself. If I socialize on a weekend, it feels like I need about 3-4 days to recover :tongue_smilie: I am definitely an introvert, but it confused me when I was younger because I am not particularly shy, and I do like hanging out with people. I just need to recharge afterward. by myself. ;) eta: LOL, crossposted with Sailormom! ITA! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperDad Posted February 27, 2012 Author Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yep! This describes me very well too (but no mood disorder here). * phew * I'm normal! Yippee! :D :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperDad Posted February 27, 2012 Author Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yes, I think it is possible. I was always confused about the introvert/extrovert thing, but the biggest clue for me is that introverts recharge by being alone mostly. I enjoy getting together with people, I'm very talkative, maybe not the most outgoing, but I am not shy. However, I find being in large groups or attending a party very, very draining. I enjoy it, but then I need to retreat and recharge by myself. If I socialize on a weekend, it feels like I need about 3-4 days to recover :tongue_smilie: I am definitely an introvert, but it confused me when I was younger because I am not particularly shy, and I do like hanging out with people. I just need to recharge afterward. by myself. ;) eta: LOL, crossposted with Sailormom! ITA! So just to clarify: The biggest difference between introverts and extroverts is that extroverts actually are energized by being around other people, while introverts can enjoy being around others but really need alone time too. AIR? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyfaithe Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yes. I am very outgoing....but, I am not very social. Not many people realize how introverted I am....but, I don't want to have a bff and I don't want to go out for lunch.....I don't mind chatting when waiting for kids at classes, or saying big hellos at the supermarket.....but I prefer to spend my real time....home, in my garden, reading, being creative and NOT engaging in conversation the whole time. Real social setting exhaust me. Faithe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momof3littles Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 So just to clarify: The biggest difference between introverts and extroverts is that extroverts actually are energized by being around other people, while introverts can enjoy being around others but really need alone time too. AIR? I'd say the extrovert is energized by socializing with others, but the introvert needs time to recover afterward ;) Introverts tend to recharge by being alone, even if they enjoy socializing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnitWit Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yes. I am very outgoing....but, I am not very social. Not many people realize how introverted I am....but, I don't want to have a bff and I don't want to go out for lunch.....I don't mind chatting when waiting for kids at classes, or saying big hellos at the supermarket.....but I prefer to spend my real time....home, in my garden, reading, being creative and NOT engaging in conversation the whole time. Real social setting exhaust me. Faithe I feel like you just described ME. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyof4ks Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yep! This describes me very well too (but no mood disorder here). This is me too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
staceyobu Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 So, what are you if you recharge being with one or two friends but find large groups absolutely exhausting (even if comprised mostly of people you know)? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I'm sort of that way. I love performing, which I don't do now except in front of ds (goofiness). I worked retail for years and actually enjoyed the people interaction. If I don't get my alone time, however, I'm horrid and edgy. I do better in planned situations or situations where there is an expectation of behavior. I don't do spontaneous get togethers with people I don't know well. I know the art of chit-chat and polite conversation, but it drains me. I also worked for a vet for five years. The best part of the job was I got to interact with animals more than people. Animals are easy, people are hard. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 My dh said a friend told him years ago he was a gregarious introvert. Oxymoron? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halcyon Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Describes me very well. I need a LOT of alone time and quiet time, but when I am with other people I am not shy--I am outgoing and friendly, for the most part. But it exhausts me! I really need recovery time after socializing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jennsmile Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yep! Describes me as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I am an introvert, but I enjoy people. I just have to recharge after spending time with a group. One on one I'm usually fine for longer periods.Introverted does not equal shy. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3Blessings Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 So, what are you if you recharge being with one or two friends but find large groups absolutely exhausting (even if comprised mostly of people you know)? I think you would count as an introvert, too. I am this way. I love small groups- I find them energizing (also love my alone time). Big groups are overwhelming. I can do it for an hour or so, but I'm always the first to leave. :) OP, my husband is absolutely the same way. His gifts are with big groups, he loves to be "on stage", etc. But he prefers working alone, loves his down time, and if asked about group work, he avoids it like the plague. He considers himself an introvert since he sees alone time as energizing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HiddenJewel Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Introverted doesn't mean you don't like being around people. It just means you need time to yourself to get re-energized. Other people get energized from being around other people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 My youngest two are major introverts but both love improv and performing on stage. When not on stage, they are very quiet, like to be home, don't have with tons of friends, etc. But when it's show week, or an improv show, they're like different people. Outgoing, loud, high energy. It's weird to see. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elise1mds Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I am both. I have actually had others comment on how much it seems like I am almost two people in one body. I adore being at home and will go weeks without going anywhere, and I will be perfectly content. When I get out with my friends, though, I come home completely relaxed and energized and can conquer the world. I can even meet strangers in those situations and enjoy it. That being said, these extroverted and introverted phases come and go. I can't be both at the same time very well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathmom Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yes, it's possible. Have you ever taken a Myers-Briggs test? I am INFJ, and one description I read of this type says that they can be mistaken for extraverts because they are so interested in other people. My dh is constantly teasing me that I am actually an extravert, but I'm not. I also enjoy speaking in front of groups and used to enjoy acting as a teen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura Corin Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 How do you recharge your batteries? When you are tired, do you get energised by going back out amongst people, or by being on your own? I'm very happy to be social, but I need alone time to recharge. I'm an introvert. Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simka2 Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yes, it is possible. I am fine in front of groups, but I love living in the middle of nowhere and having time to myself. I am another INFJ, but was pretty borderline on the other one that is very similar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donna Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 My dd is very outgoing, social, and loves to perform but when she needs to "recharge" she takes time to go off by herself and do something quiet like crafts or read. We did personality testing a couple years ago as part of a full evaluation and she came out right in the middle of the introverted/extroverted scale. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in Neverland Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I am an introvert, but I enjoy people. I just have to recharge after spending time with a group. One on one I'm usually fine for longer periods.Introverted does not equal shy. :iagree: Most people think I am an extrovert but I am not... I just play one on TV. :tongue_smilie: In my job I have to be able to fake it really well so I have gotten very good at it but it exhausts me and I need lots of alone time to recharge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zebra Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yes! Being an introvert only means you get worn out by socializing, rather than energized. Some of the kindest most thoughtful people I know are introverts, and they never get credit for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ErinE Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I'm an outgoing introvert. I like talking to other people and don't feel shy in an unfamiliar setting. However, I need time alone to recharge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinder Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 So just to clarify: The biggest difference between introverts and extroverts is that extroverts actually are energized by being around other people, while introverts can enjoy being around others but really need alone time too. AIR? That's how a friend described herself to me. She's quite outgoing, not shy, enjoys being around people. But then she needs time alone to re-energize. After a big co-op event at her house she told me it would take her about a week before she was ready to be in that kind of group setting again. That she loved having people over, but needed significant down time afterward. Until I met her I didn't really understand the difference between introverts and extroverts. I had thought all introverts were shy, like me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I think extroversion/introversion is on a scale. Some people are more to one end of the scale than others. I've done the Myers-Briggs a number of times and I've come out as extroverted and introverted on that test depending on the day. When I'm with big crowds day after day, I crave some alone time. When I'm isolated for a while, I crave people! Right now I'm feeling a little isolated actually and would love to even banter regularly on e-mail with another adult. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jjins Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Yes, it's possible. Have you ever taken a Myers-Briggs test? I am INFJ, and one description I read of this type says that they can be mistaken for extraverts because they are so interested in other people. Me too... I love this description: http://www.personalitypage.com/INFJ.html I often have people who do not know me well think I am extroverted. Then as they get to know me better and try spending DAYS at a time with me, they think I am a B!^@%. However, those who really know me, my family and SUPER close friends know that I have to, MUST and will not function unless I get my time alone. I will sacrifice sleep for time alone on a daily bases. Strangely enough though, LARGE social activities that I have two help with will crash me so hard I have to SLEEP to recover. I am talking coming home from a 4 hours co-op and falling asleep at the drop of a hat. However, I go place and chit chat with people all the time. I feel drawn to those who I sense are struggling emotionally, I want to help them. My DD is clearly the same... DS very close, like DH. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AuntieM Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I agree there's a "scale," and I may be biased but I think the hardest place to be is right in the middle. I took an online quiz once that scored me as 51% introvert, 48% extrovert. Acquaintances and family members are always a bit taken aback when my introvert side rears up and I become hermitish. If I were closer to either end of the spectrum I think they would have an easier time understanding me. :001_smile: MFS has been very good about linking "How to Care for Your Introvert" type articles on this board (thanks, MFS!). I always forward them to my dh and oldest child. They have come to have a much better understanding of me. Now if I could only get those extended family members and church committee-formers to see the light.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LisaKinVA Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 Having taken several Myers-Briggs type tests over the years... yup. I'm a conflicted I&E; S&N; T; J&P. Depending upon how I'm feeling on the day of the test, I can lean one way more than another. I am more an I than an E... a big difference is that I prefer substantial interaction vs. just a lot. My mom is energized by a lot. I am energized by substantial (along with some alone time). I woke up the past couple of days feeling incredibly energized. I had real, meaningful interaction with a friend...I felt like I could be myself and talk about things that were important to me (vs. just chit-chat). It was invigorating and exciting. It's something I have really been missing. I also got some quiet time. A by-product of that could be seen on Sunday, where I found it much easier to chit-chat with Girl Scout moms with whom I have much less in common. So, because the "introvert" in me was invigorated, I was able to relax and be more "extroverted" without feeling incredibly drained afterwards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sassenach Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I am definitely an outgoing introvert. I think that it's a myth that to be introverted, you have to be shy. I need alone time, but I don't need to be alone all the time. We have one extravert in our family, and she seriously withers away when she is isolated. The rest of us are happy to be around people, but will wander off to be by ourselves for awhile at the end of the day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 I am definitely an outgoing introvert. I think that it's a myth that to be introverted, you have to be shy. I need alone time, but I don't need to be alone all the time. We have one extravert in our family, and she seriously withers away when she is isolated. The rest of us are happy to be around people, but will wander off to be by ourselves for awhile at the end of the day. :iagree: I also have a shy extrovert. Yes, it's true. She craves time with others and recharges by being with others but she has had selective mutism - just shutting down completely if she's in the spotlight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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