Faith Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I don't know what to think. How do you feel about this? http://www.litefm.com/cc-common/mainheadlines3.html?feed=421220&article=9738000 (The video does have some curse words in it.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dangermom Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I think he overdid it. Yeah, she was a snot online. That doesn't mean he has to be a worse snot right back, in public. He's not the immature teenager--she is. I think it would have been appropriate to take custody of her computer, and have an honest talk about what her expectations are and what the parents' expectations are. What if they really are asking too much housework out of her for her schoolwork to get done properly? This reaction is not going to bring them closer together. It may feel nice to see a smackdown, but I don't think it was a good idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elise1mds Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I think he acted out of anger rather than thinking things through. I applaud the fact that he defended the family friend who helps clean their house as well as standing up for the mother and stepmother, and I like the fact that he is taking action against the blatant disrespect that this girl showed, but I think he took the situation in a direction it should not have gone. There were many better ways to handle this. Posting a tirade on her Facebook wall shows that he's no better than she is. I personally would not like to be his daughter, and not just because she's grounded indefinitely. I think there are a lot of unresolved family issues demonstrated in the video. My two cents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hwin Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 Well, I have a few fb friends that have reposted it along with a "way to go!" sort of comment, but I thought it was over the top. The daughter obviously got her overreaction gene from her dad... Not to mention, he told her in the video that she might not even ever see it (since she's grounded from any opportunity to get on facebook). So what exactly was the point? Humiliating her as thoroughly as possible in front of her friends? On the other hand, she was asking for it. She bashed her parents publicly. I obviously have mixed feelings :tongue_smilie: I have no idea what my own father would have done ... because I never would have spoken about him like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AuntieM Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 Right though he may be, he has now humiliated her in front of her friends (well, virtually, anyway). I can't see that righting the wrongs in their relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsheresomewhere Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I did like the line about him working in IT and she should think about that. I loved what he did. I bet that this goes a lot further than what was said. I also liked that he stuck up for every family member and the friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 My view will not likely be in themajority here, but it sounds like they have given her many chanes, grounded her etc for continued direspectful behaviour. They paid for the laptop etc and given my current feelings about wanting to take a baseball bat to the main electronic source of contention in my home I like what the dad did. I think if he had donated the laptop to a needy family who would appreciate it rather than shooting it up would have been better, but I can say it is an object lesson for the girl to learn not to disparage and disrespect her parents online. They had previously grounded her, limited her access etc. THose measures didn't work, it appears that she posted garbage about her parents as soon as she got it back from being grounded off. She was a spoiled brat and perhaps doing without he laptop, or any extras until she pays for them herself will teach her some respect and make her realize how lucky she really is. The thing that struck me the most wasn't that he shot it up, but that the sounds of gunshots wheren't having people calling 911. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LisaKinVA Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 The venting was an age-appropriate pity party, the forum was not. I remember writing similar stuff in my journal or yacking to a friend or two... but posting stuff like that on your FB page, would be like taking out a billboard. His response is a public response to what she did... The parents owned the computer, so are free to do with it what they wish (we might have chosen to donate it rather than shoot it, but I definitely get the same feelings about the kids bringing their toys to our school area, especially WRT LEGO under my bare feet, when LEGOs have been banished to the basement) He made a promise and followed through... good parenting. Embarrassing his daughter like that, I have mixed feelings about. Personally, I would have said No FB without mom and dad as friends, and NO FB without us knowing the password. No e-mails come to my kids or are sent from my kids that don't get cc: to us. My KIDS are well aware of this. There is no such thing as a "private" FB account in this house. If one was found, all internet privileges would be suspended...indefinitely. I think someone who is in IT for a living could find a better way to deal with this than shooting the computer. Oh, and the only computers that have internet access are password protected by US, and are in full-view of a parent. No computers in rooms would have access to the internet. Some people have said that in CA or MA he'd be in jail...I don't know what the rationale is (maybe cyber-bullying?) One person called it child abuse. I don't think this rises to that level, either. It's a mixture. I get his feelings, but I think there could have been better ways to respond. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I wouldn't have done this in a million years. I don't parent that way. Also, we don't own any guns. That said, if you take the time to read his FB page, and all the updates and comments, you'll see that his daughter was initially outraged but now they are both joking about it. They've forgiven each other and they're both fine. (Actually, it seems they are an awful lot alike and get along pretty well.) Most of the derogatory comments toward him on FB are from teenagers clamoring about her rights to publicly dishonor her parents on the technology they bought for her. Imagine that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicMom Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 The chores he stated she had to do were not over the top. My kids would absolutely lose their Facebook and laptop, since posting anything like that is disrespectful and a misuse of social media. Also, she had previously been in trouble for misusing facebook. Shoot the laptop? Probably not, but gunshots where I live wouldn't be called into 911, either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AuntieM Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I wouldn't have done this in a million years. I don't parent that way. Also, we don't own any guns. That said, if you take the time to read his FB page, and all the updates and comments, you'll see that his daughter was initially outraged but now they are both joking about it. They've forgiven each other and they're both fine. (Actually, it seems they are an awful lot alike and get along pretty well.) Most of the derogatory comments toward him on FB are from teenagers clamoring about her rights to publicly dishonor her parents on the technology they bought for her. Imagine that. That's good to know. My teen dd would have given dad the silent treatment for a decade if he did something like that to her! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Princess Peach Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I really don't think it's a big deal what the father did. It's not what I would have done, but I think we're probably quite different. :001_smile: It's not abusive in any way and the gun is not a big deal. He used it safely. Where I grew up, no one would give a gunshot a second thought. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ravinlunachick Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 The thing that struck me the most wasn't that he shot it up, but that the sounds of gunshots wheren't having people calling 911. :lol::lol::lol: You are such a Canadian. ;) My neighbor across the way has apparently recently purchased a semiautomatic weapon, and we are treated to hours of gunfire every Saturday afternoon. Yay us. My first thought was that it was a shame he destroyed the laptop. I think he should have given it to "The Cleaning Lady." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silliness7 Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 The disrespect was bad and disobedience were bad enough. But this girl distributed the post in such a way that it wouldn't go to her parents. What a deceitful little snot. I would tend to think that this family has a lot of issues and though I don't think what dad did was wrong I do wonder what his plans are to restore the relationship. The fact that he was living on his own at her age (15) tells me that parent/teen conflict might be normal mode and you deal with it by exerting your power. "I'm in charge because I have more power...strength, money, smarts, whatever." She'll be out of there as soon as she can and won't look back. Perhaps what he did as a teen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Durriyyah Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 (edited) I'm also in the minority it looks like... I like what he did overall. It sounds like she had been acting disrespectfully often enough that a point needed to be made. He was obviously upset, but I didn't think he was raging in anger. For some people, a gun isn't a big deal, so I'm looking at it from what I think his perspective is... he could have put it in a lake or something else to make the same point. I guess I just see all too often kids walking all over their parents and the parents saying "well, kids will be kids." I like when I see a parent not putting up with it, without abusing their kid, of course. Edited February 10, 2012 by Durriyyah grammar! :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abigail4476 Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I think destroying the laptop and making her buy her own the next time is a perfectly reasonable consequence. Posting it for the world to see? NOT going to accomplish anything positive, IMO. I don't see the point in humiliating kids publicly. He could have thought it through a little better, though, and made her give her laptop to her little brother or to someone else who needs it. It was a shame to waste a good laptop. If he talks to his daughter all the time the way he talked in that video, I can understand him having a very frustrated, upset, rebellious kid. When you disrespect children and condescend to them like that, you will reap it in spades. In my experience, respect in relationships--including the parent-child relationship--is the key to success. This video just made me sad. I have yet to see a family with that kind of dynamic whose children turned out whole and happy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faith Posted February 10, 2012 Author Share Posted February 10, 2012 I think destroying the laptop and making her buy her own the next time is a perfectly reasonable consequence. Posting it for the world to see? NOT going to accomplish anything positive, IMO. I don't see the point in humiliating kids publicly. He could have thought it through a little better, though, and made her give her laptop to her little brother or to someone else who needs it. It was a shame to waste a good laptop. If he talks to his daughter all the time the way he talked in that video, I can understand him having a very frustrated, upset, rebellious kid. When you disrespect children and condescend to them like that, you will reap it in spades. In my experience, respect in relationships--including the parent-child relationship--is the key to success. This video just made me sad. I have yet to see a family with that kind of dynamic whose children turned out whole and happy. See, this is the way I am leaning also. I mean I can see he got mad, I would too but publicly humiliating her is not really the way to do it. I also think there are many problems in their relationship that led up to her saying all that in the first place. It's so sad to me. I wasn't even able to finish the video. If my parents had done that to me, I'd never have spoke to them ever again. I don't think everything is fine now with them even though someone said they are joking about the whole thing now. Nope, there is much more going on in this relationship. So sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 :lol: You know, kids are just able to do so much more harm with FB now, then when we were kids. What could we do, call each other and kvetch? Now everyone on FB knows, it gets upleaded to youtube, and the next day it's viral and being read across the world and your tantrum/parenting is being made an object lesson in God knows where. I don't parent that way, but I can see that she needed a lesson on what you don't say online. Ever. Hopefully he now learned his lesson, too. ;) I'm glad they're laughing about it now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tess in the Burbs Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I like what he did. He said earlier he would, he followed through on his word. Personally if I had spent money on the computer I wouldn't put a bullet in it but sell it or keep for myself, but he made a good point. Kids today truly don't realize once it's online it's there forever. Delete means little in a digital age. Everything is archived online. As for chores...she has too little responsibility for her age! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stacy in NJ Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 The daughter's rant was irrational and overly emotional. The dad's response was similar. While I don't want to copy that dynamic within my own family, it might work for them. I'd want to know more about the relationship before I judged the dad's actions in a negative or positive light. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheila in OK Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 My thoughts exactly. I think he overdid it. Yeah, she was a snot online. That doesn't mean he has to be a worse snot right back, in public. He's not the immature teenager--she is. I think it would have been appropriate to take custody of her computer, and have an honest talk about what her expectations are and what the parents' expectations are. What if they really are asking too much housework out of her for her schoolwork to get done properly? This reaction is not going to bring them closer together. It may feel nice to see a smackdown, but I don't think it was a good idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skirch Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 It's kind of funny how he found out though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NotAVampireLvr Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 Treating fire with fire won't get much accomplished here. Clearly there is a power struggle going on in that house. I probably would've done everything he did though - other than posting to to Facebook. I instead would've left a copy of the video on a DVD where she keeps her laptop and have her watch it that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ohdanigirl Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 (edited) My view will not likely be in themajority here, but it sounds like they have given her many chanes, grounded her etc for continued direspectful behaviour. They paid for the laptop etc and given my current feelings about wanting to take a baseball bat to the main electronic source of contention in my home I like what the dad did. I think if he had donated the laptop to a needy family who would appreciate it rather than shooting it up would have been better, but I can say it is an object lesson for the girl to learn not to disparage and disrespect her parents online. They had previously grounded her, limited her access etc. THose measures didn't work, it appears that she posted garbage about her parents as soon as she got it back from being grounded off. She was a spoiled brat and perhaps doing without he laptop, or any extras until she pays for them herself will teach her some respect and make her realize how lucky she really is. :iagree: Sometimes parents need to be hard a$$es. My dad was. I would prefer that, to a beating any day. I didn't think so at the time, but it is true. Danielle ETA: Did you see this video response? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VnB-KtX45lE&feature=youtube_gdata_player Edited February 10, 2012 by USDGAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dobela Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 She took her rant to a public forum, and he replied in a public forum. She called someone the cleaning lady who in fact is not 'just' a cleaning lady but rather someone who is trading her hard work for other business. My guess is that many of this teen's friends know just who the lady is. The dad was right to correct misconception in a very public manner IMO. As well as to defend his actions and those of other family members who were disrespected in a public way. Without responding in a public way, his daughter and her misconceptions could have very much damagaed innocent reputations. I think what the dad did was just fine. I hope he actually follows thru and makes her work to pay for her own laptop. And that she stays grounded and has to do more chores than she has so far been given. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ma23peas Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I wish he could have filmed it without smoking..that bugs me. No self control or a crutch? I wish he would not have put that out there publically, I think it demeans their relationship...give respect, get respect. I think they both owe each other an apology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teachin'Mine Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 How do we even know that it's the daughter who's posting on her FB page? Might well be the mom or dad posting as if the daughter. Sad all around. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimber Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 She took her rant to a public forum, and he replied in a public forum. She called someone the cleaning lady who in fact is not 'just' a cleaning lady but rather someone who is trading her hard work for other business. My guess is that many of this teen's friends know just who the lady is. The dad was right to correct misconception in a very public manner IMO. As well as to defend his actions and those of other family members who were disrespected in a public way. Without responding in a public way, his daughter and her misconceptions could have very much damagaed innocent reputations. I think what the dad did was just fine. I hope he actually follows thru and makes her work to pay for her own laptop. And that she stays grounded and has to do more chores than she has so far been given. Ditto. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 She took her rant to a public forum, and he replied in a public forum. She called someone the cleaning lady who in fact is not 'just' a cleaning lady but rather someone who is trading her hard work for other business. My guess is that many of this teen's friends know just who the lady is. The dad was right to correct misconception in a very public manner IMO. As well as to defend his actions and those of other family members who were disrespected in a public way. Without responding in a public way, his daughter and her misconceptions could have very much damagaed innocent reputations. I think what the dad did was just fine. I hope he actually follows thru and makes her work to pay for her own laptop. And that she stays grounded and has to do more chores than she has so far been given. :iagree: Wolf thought it was fantastic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Princess Peach Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 It's kind of funny how he found out though. :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murphy101 Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 It's kind of funny how he found out though. That IS funny! I think wasting bullets and shooting at a just upgraded laptop is moronic. Donate it or sell or anything else other than just waste it. I don't care that he owns a gun and does firing practice on his property. I will say that was not safe use. It's always been my understanding that shooting point blank range at the ground (or flat plastic laying in the ground) is a risk for close range ricochet? A teen that gripes about chores and mutters some cussing is nothing new or all that much of a crisis situation. Meh. Being deceitful would have cost my teen computer access and FB. The cussing and disrespect of family and hard workers would have been harshly lectured here as well. (par for the course, but not acceptable none the less) Doing it publicly would have cost her a public reaction. Not for retaliation, but because sometimes a hardheaded teen refuses to believe you until they suffer what you have warned them about. Posting stupid carp on the Internet can bite her in the bum later. This was a rather mild lesson that they can laugh about years later vs still suffering the consequences of for years to come. However, I note the fact that he has spoiled his daughter and given her so much that she has nothing to work for is completely ignored. I applaud him for seeing this error and correcting it ASAP, but like in most relationships - there's likely some blame to go around. On the plus side, I made my teens watch it and they were aghast at both of them. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LucyStoner Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 It's not hard to see where the daughter got her sense of entitlement and proclivity for whining. Apple did not fall far from the tree here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renthead Mommy Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 She's a snot. And the fact that she tried to hide post makes it worse. What she's asked to do isn't the problem. It's more that she thinks, and she could be right, that her friends don't even have to do that much. Which is truely sad. I'd guess she has no appreciation for the things she has. I see that in my nieces and nephew. Lose an Ipad, expect mom to just replace like a lost mitten. Sometimes it takes really drastic measures. As for anyone that has issues with the gun, listening to his accent, plus the hat, makes me think he's in region where something like that isn't questioned. When we lived in Texas, that wouldn't surprise me at all. Culturally it would have been totally accepted by the 'natives'. Some of the military that lived there may have wondered, (mainly because we came from places other than texas or not from gun friendly cultures) but the native Texas never would have blinked. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Excelsior! Academy Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I did like the line about him working in IT and she should think about that. I loved what he did. I bet that this goes a lot further than what was said. I also liked that he stuck up for every family member and the friend. The chores he stated she had to do were not over the top. My kids would absolutely lose their Facebook and laptop, since posting anything like that is disrespectful and a misuse of social media. Also, she had previously been in trouble for misusing facebook.Shoot the laptop? Probably not, but gunshots where I live wouldn't be called into 911, either. I really don't think it's a big deal what the father did. It's not what I would have done, but I think we're probably quite different. :001_smile: It's not abusive in any way and the gun is not a big deal. He used it safely. Where I grew up, no one would give a gunshot a second thought. I'm also in the minority it looks like... I like what he did overall. It sounds like she had been acting disrespectfully often enough that a point needed to be made. He was obviously upset, but I didn't think he was raging in anger. For some people, a gun isn't a big deal, so I'm looking at it from what I think his perspective is... he could have put it in a lake or something else to make the same point. I guess I just see all too often kids walking all over their parents and the parents saying "well, kids will be kids." I like when I see a parent not putting up with it, without abusing their kid, of course. I like what he did. He said earlier he would, he followed through on his word. Personally if I had spent money on the computer I wouldn't put a bullet in it but sell it or keep for myself, but he made a good point. Kids today truly don't realize once it's online it's there forever. Delete means little in a digital age. Everything is archived online. As for chores...she has too little responsibility for her age! She took her rant to a public forum, and he replied in a public forum. She called someone the cleaning lady who in fact is not 'just' a cleaning lady but rather someone who is trading her hard work for other business. My guess is that many of this teen's friends know just who the lady is. The dad was right to correct misconception in a very public manner IMO. As well as to defend his actions and those of other family members who were disrespected in a public way. Without responding in a public way, his daughter and her misconceptions could have very much damagaed innocent reputations. I think what the dad did was just fine. I hope he actually follows thru and makes her work to pay for her own laptop. And that she stays grounded and has to do more chores than she has so far been given. :iagree:Wolf thought it was fantastic. :iagree: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scrappyhappymama Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I'm all for tough love parenting when necessary. However, she disrespects and humiliates her family in public and... he disrespects and humiliates her in public. She takes her grievances outside the family instead of dealing with them with her dad directly and... he takes his grievances outside the family rather than dealing with her directly. She cusses in her letter, which daddy disapproves of and... he cusses right back at her in his response video. She complains about her chores and what a waste of her time it is and... he complains about wasting half his day upgrading her computer. She needs to take more responsibility, and look for ways to earn money to buy the things she wants and... he demonstrates this responsibility by destroying an expensive, just upgraded laptop. I'm sorry. I wanted to love the video and cheer "Go Dad!" In another context, shooting the laptop would even be funny, in an Office Space sort of way. But, I don't think he's sending the message he thinks he is. In fact, I think he's reinforcing the effectiveness of the very behavior he wants to discourage in his daughter. "Do as I say and not as I do." Not my cuppa. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I did like the line about him working in IT and she should think about that. I loved what he did. I bet that this goes a lot further than what was said. I also liked that he stuck up for every family member and the friend. Me too! I didn't like the cursing though; he has no place correcting her language if he can't restrain his own. Other than that - and having a 15 year old daughter myself - I just LOVED the part where he enumerated her responsibilities, which were far fewer than she made it sound, as I fully expected. She said she had to "do all the floors", which conjures images of Cinderella, scrubbing on her knees. But no - he asked her to vacuum 2 rooms which would take 3 minutes. He asked her to wipe down counters IF they were dirty and empty dishwasher of clean dishes, not spend hours "doing all the dishes", as if there were a pile to the ceiling she had to wash by hand. He asked her only to make her own bed, but she said she had to "make all the beds". Poor thing - my kids make their beds before they even leave the bedroom in the morning to have breakfast. I'm not sure it will be helpful to the relationship, especially since he mentioned Mom and a stepMom, meaning a divorce situation, but she certainly will never forget not to disrespect her parents in public again. I'm kind of impressed with Dad, actually, though I'd rather have given away the laptop to someone than shot it. But it was dramatic and unforgettable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 My view will not likely be in themajority here, but it sounds like they have given her many chanes, grounded her etc for continued direspectful behaviour. They paid for the laptop etc and given my current feelings about wanting to take a baseball bat to the main electronic source of contention in my home I like what the dad did. I think if he had donated the laptop to a needy family who would appreciate it rather than shooting it up would have been better, but I can say it is an object lesson for the girl to learn not to disparage and disrespect her parents online. They had previously grounded her, limited her access etc. THose measures didn't work, it appears that she posted garbage about her parents as soon as she got it back from being grounded off. She was a spoiled brat and perhaps doing without he laptop, or any extras until she pays for them herself will teach her some respect and make her realize how lucky she really is. My thoughts, exactly. People seem to be missing the part about how she was warned repeatedly not to do this kind of thing. She won't forget or ignore it now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 LisaK in VA: Personally, I would have said No FB without mom and dad as friends, You are aware that with custom screening, you can just prevent Mom and Dad from seeing anything you like, even if they are friends. and NO FB without us knowing the password. This is the only way to see it unvarnished. I insist on this too. No e-mails come to my kids or are sent from my kids that don't get cc: to us. My KIDS are well aware of this. There is no such thing as a "private" FB account in this house. If one was found, all internet privileges would be suspended...indefinitely. Agreed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JessReplanted Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I'm all for tough love parenting when necessary. However, she disrespects and humiliates her family in public and... he disrespects and humiliates her in public. She takes her grievances outside the family instead of dealing with them with her dad directly and... he takes his grievances outside the family rather than dealing with her directly. She cusses in her letter, which daddy disapproves of and... he cusses right back at her in his response video. She complains about her chores and what a waste of her time it is and... he complains about wasting half his day upgrading her computer. She needs to take more responsibility, and look for ways to earn money to buy the things she wants and... he demonstrates this responsibility by destroying an expensive, just upgraded laptop. I'm sorry. I wanted to love the video and cheer "Go Dad!" In another context, shooting the laptop would even be funny, in an Office Space sort of way. But, I don't think he's sending the message he thinks he is. In fact, I think he's reinforcing the effectiveness of the very behavior he wants to discourage in his daughter. "Do as I say and not as I do." Not my cuppa. :iagree: with all of this. And, the cigarette was just weird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 Tibbie Dunbar: I wouldn't have done this in a million years. I don't parent that way. Also, we don't own any guns. That said, if you take the time to read his FB page, and all the updates and comments, you'll see that his daughter was initially outraged but now they are both joking about it. They've forgiven each other and they're both fine. That's good to hear. She will not mess with him again. (Actually, it seems they are an awful lot alike and get along pretty well.) Exactly. Most of the derogatory comments toward him on FB are from teenagers clamoring about her rights to publicly dishonor her parents on the technology they bought for her. Imagine that. Gag. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I liked that he called her out, picking apart her on-line rant, and posted it for her peers - who also saw her original rant - to see. So what if it embarrasses her - she SHOULD be embarrassed! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 It's kind of funny how he found out though. Oh, that is hilarious. And just what she deserved, the sneaky little snot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abigail4476 Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 It's kind of funny how he found out though. That is funny, and I also have to admit that I smirked when he shot the computer. I consider electronics for kids a completely unnecessary luxury, so I would have no problem putting an iPod, for instance, out of its misery. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 She took her rant to a public forum, and he replied in a public forum. She called someone the cleaning lady who in fact is not 'just' a cleaning lady but rather someone who is trading her hard work for other business. My guess is that many of this teen's friends know just who the lady is. The dad was right to correct misconception in a very public manner IMO. As well as to defend his actions and those of other family members who were disrespected in a public way. Without responding in a public way, his daughter and her misconceptions could have very much damagaed innocent reputations. I think what the dad did was just fine. I hope he actually follows thru and makes her work to pay for her own laptop. And that she stays grounded and has to do more chores than she has so far been given. Totally agree. She chose this public way to pitch her fit and he is totally reasonable to correct her deceitful rant in a public manner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faith Posted February 10, 2012 Author Share Posted February 10, 2012 I'm all for tough love parenting when necessary. However, she disrespects and humiliates her family in public and... he disrespects and humiliates her in public. She takes her grievances outside the family instead of dealing with them with her dad directly and... he takes his grievances outside the family rather than dealing with her directly. She cusses in her letter, which daddy disapproves of and... he cusses right back at her in his response video. She complains about her chores and what a waste of her time it is and... he complains about wasting half his day upgrading her computer. She needs to take more responsibility, and look for ways to earn money to buy the things she wants and... he demonstrates this responsibility by destroying an expensive, just upgraded laptop. I'm sorry. I wanted to love the video and cheer "Go Dad!" In another context, shooting the laptop would even be funny, in an Office Space sort of way. But, I don't think he's sending the message he thinks he is. In fact, I think he's reinforcing the effectiveness of the very behavior he wants to discourage in his daughter. "Do as I say and not as I do." Not my cuppa. :iagree: Sounds like we know where she learned it from..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kewb Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I think shooting the laptop was a bit over the top but it sounds like his daughter needed a wake up call to her behavior. However, I equate her facebook rant with the kind of venting I would have done in my diary and with my best friends. I would have used that language, too. The father was getting angry over something he wasn't ever supposed to know about. IMO, today's youth have no real understanding of proper time and place for these kinds of vents. Their lives are open books. Perhaps now she will choose her venting with more care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bang!Zoom! Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 This isn't going to be over in a week. That is going to follow her for the rest of her life. Job interviews, rent or background checks...college application time, friendships, association applications... "Oh, are you the same Susie Smith who's dad shot up that laptop?" The internet is forever. I'm not so sure Dad thought that part through. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hockey Mom Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 I liked that he called her out, picking apart her on-line rant, and posted it for her peers - who also saw her original rant - to see. So what if it embarrasses her - she SHOULD be embarrassed! :iagree: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ester Maria Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 This is so wrong on so many levels that I cannot even wrap my mind about this reaction. :001_huh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommyrooch Posted February 10, 2012 Share Posted February 10, 2012 This isn't going to be over in a week. That is going to follow her for the rest of her life. Job interviews, rent or background checks...college application time, friendships, association applications... "Oh, are you the same Susie Smith who's dad shot up that laptop?" The internet is forever. I'm not so sure Dad thought that part through. :iagree: I actually agree with what the dad did and his reasons for doing it. I don't agree with how he did it though. My reasons for disagreeing with how he did it aren't because of her embarrassment. She probably deserved to be embarrassed because she did appear to be a spoiled little snot that had no trouble embarrassing her family. I understand the need for the shock factor. However, this should have been done in a way that it would have only been a short term, in the moment kind of thing. My reasons for disagreeing with "how" the dad did this are the same as what was posted above. This could have some long term, damaging ramifications for this girl and her future. The internet is forever and what is done cannot be undone. This could follow this girl for the rest of her life. I also don't think that the dad probably thought that part through. :001_unsure: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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