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Censoring movies: What makes you say no?


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I was just thinking about what different parents censor in regards to TV/movies. Is it as clear cut as going by G, PG, PG-13, R and age, or more like we don't allow sensuality or sexual innuendo or violence or bloody violence or zombies, etc. Maybe you allow some PG-13 with kids under 13, but no bloody violence or sensuality? And so on.

 

Just curious. :001_smile:

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We let our kids watch many PG-13 things even when they were much younger. The basic guideline was that fantasy or battle violence was OK, but any of the other things to cause PG-13 weren't (s*x, nudity, language, gang violence). So that made Lord of the Rings acceptable. :D

 

Our dd is 18 now so she can see whatever she wants, but we have asked her to make wise choices. My dh and I have never been big fans of R-rated movies for ourselves, and we've explained why, so I hope she's taken that to heart.

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I can say it really depends on the movie/show. There may be a cartoon that has more violence, then a regular show, so I guess whatever it is, has to line up with our family values, not that we always make the right choices either.

:confused: but we try. So I guess, we just take each movie/ show as it comes. Alot of times we look up the focus on the family website (pluggedinonline) and they have pros and cons of different movies that are newer. Then we can make more of an educated choice on what to let our kids watch. The worse thing in the world to me, is being in the middle of a good movie, and having to turn it off, or feel guilty later that I didn't turn it off- been there:glare: , because of foul language etc..

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Our decisions are based completely on kid-to-content compatibility. :D

 

For example, our 13yo can handle movies with quite a bit of violence and inuendo in them because the inuendo goes over her head (or she's comfortable enough to either ask us about it or say, "that was a sex thing, right? then I don't want to know" :D) and she's so fascinated by how fantasy violence is created on screen or the this actually happened?! question in historically violent movies that she's watching it from a completely technical perspective. DD15 is just now ready for these types of movies from a maturity stand point. She's on a huge zombie kick right now, and eats these movies up (pun only slightly intended) but will be the first to say "too much" and turn off something she's not ready for.

 

Ds11 is very sensitive. He can handle fantasy violence pretty well, but historically-based violence makes him horribly sad. Ds8 isn't mature enough to distingush reality vs fantasy in many instances. We restrict their viewing much more.

 

That said, we are rather free in what we let our children watch (or so we've been told). This is probably because we have very open relationships with our kids and they are very comfortable discussing questions and concerns with us... something we are thankful for daily.

 

We pay very little attention to industry ratings.

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My kids are pretty young, so sex and really serious violence is out. I'm fine with fantasy violence. Language is not a litmus test (we hear m-f- just walking on our street enough that I can't even feel like it's worth bothering in a movie).

 

I feel like for young kids, it's more about theme than anything else. Will it be something that upsets them? And will it be something that really touches on their own lives? What's the end message and is it something they can comprehend?

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Here's the best way I can describe what we watch/allow our kids to watch, in regards to entertainment.

 

If Christ was alive in body on the earth, sitting next to me on the couch, would I feel completely comfortable watching what I'm watching? If not, then I shouldn't be watching it. (Because if the Holy Spirit lives inside me, then the Lord IS watching what I'm watching, iykwim.) And therefore, my children shouldn't be watching it, either. We do not have a 'This is ok for mommy and daddy to watch for entertainment, but not you kids' thing at our house. Either the program is appropriate entertainment, or it's not.

 

Which basically means we watch very little tv or movies.

 

Now, we have a slightly different way of thinking regarding things we watch not for entertainment, but for information. For example, the evening news. Dh and I may decide to watch a news program, but wouldn't likely let the little boys sit and watch it with us. There are regularly things on the news that we don't feel are age appropriate for them yet.

 

That's how it works for us.

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For our children (9 & 12yo) it is a no to...Actually Dh and I don't watch these types of movies either...

 

sex

sexually immoral behavior shown without negative consequences.

nudity (We are not going to freak out over a rear end but anything else is a no go)

swearing (1 or 2 words and we won't turn it off. More than that and it starts to grate on my nerves)

drugs

presenting evil as good or funny

vilifying or mocking our faith

mocking authority figures unless there are natural consequences shown in the movie.

Anything gory. No modern war movies for example, but my DH and DS watched a war movie from 1948 that was fine.

 

We are very careful with movies that present humanistic and false religious beliefs as well. If we are going to watch the movie, we make sure to take time to discuss the issue with the children.

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For our children (9 & 12yo) it is a no to...Actually Dh and I don't watch these types of movies either...

 

sex

sexually immoral behavior shown without negative consequences.

nudity (We are not going to freak out over a rear end but anything else is a no go)

swearing (1 or 2 words and we won't turn it off. More than that and it starts to grate on my nerves)

drugs

presenting evil as good or funny

vilifying or mocking our faith

mocking authority figures unless there are natural consequences shown in the movie.

Anything gory. No modern war movies for example, but my DH and DS watched a war movie from 1948 that was fine.

 

We are very careful with movies that present humanistic and false religious beliefs as well. If we are going to watch the movie, we make sure to take time to discuss the issue with the children.

 

:iagree:

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We don't really always go by ratings but we do censor, swearing, crude humor, sex scenes, innuendos, gore, heavy occult, nudity etc. My ds has seen quite a few action, super hero, fantasy type movies that are PG 13, but he does not scare easily. I also base my decision on the childs ability to handle violence and scary scenes. If it is rated PG 13 my dh and I will preview it first, and then decide if ds can watch. The other kids pretty much only watch G and PG. I have found more problems with many of the PG movies though for them(i.e. Mr Poppers Penguins:001_huh: My 3 year old learned a new word from that I did not appreciate. I should have known better since it was Jim Carrey). As far a R rated films my dh and I rarely watch them and the kids would not be watching any for a long time. I would not say that everything adults watch needs to be appropriate for kids but we as adults try to stay clear of much of what I listed above as well. Some movies I tell my ds are just adult movies not because they are bad persay but because they just are not intended for kids.

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For our children (9 & 12yo) it is a no to...Actually Dh and I don't watch these types of movies either...

 

sex

sexually immoral behavior shown without negative consequences.

nudity (We are not going to freak out over a rear end but anything else is a no go)

swearing (1 or 2 words and we won't turn it off. More than that and it starts to grate on my nerves)

drugs

presenting evil as good or funny

vilifying or mocking our faith

mocking authority figures unless there are natural consequences shown in the movie.

Anything gory. No modern war movies for example, but my DH and DS watched a war movie from 1948 that was fine.

 

We are very careful with movies that present humanistic and false religious beliefs as well. If we are going to watch the movie, we make sure to take time to discuss the issue with the children.

:iagree:

 

I'll also add:

 

Any show/movie that shows the parents as bumbling idiots and the kids as sarcastic brats is also not watched 'round these parts. Mostly because my boys seem to retain and imitate a lot.

 

Any movie showing cruelty to animals (non-animated). DS8 can't even watch those ASPCA commercials because it upsets him too much.

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The basic guideline was that fantasy or battle violence was OK, but any of the other things to cause PG-13 weren't (s*x, nudity, language, gang violence). So that made Lord of the Rings acceptable. :D

 

Pretty much this.

 

The big thing I'm against is s*x, sensuality. I'm not a prude, I don't mind it for myself:D. But I feel like it's pervaded every aspect of life, and I don't care to invite it into my living room or pay for my kids to watch it.

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We're pretty relaxed on movies. I've never said no to anything my kids have asked to see. My no go list would be anything with sex that gets it an X rating obviously, and I will warn them if there will be cruelty to animals portrayed.

I just saw Water for Elephants the other night and I had to shut my eyes a few times when that guy went after the elephant with the bull hook. Elephants are my favorite elephant and even though I know it was all fiction and the elephant wasn't hurt, I also know that many have suffered at the hands of those using hooks like that. My kids are the same way with animal stuff so I make sure to let them know if a movie may have it and let them decide if they really want to see it then.

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For us it would be anything with graphic sex scenes, or heavily implied sex situations, and something that has constant cursing in it. Violence isn't as big of a deal for us.

 

I'm the complete opposite! We're teaching our children that sex is pretty darn cool - WHEN YOU'RE OLD ENOUGH and we'll get more into that as they get older.

 

But violence? No. We don't do gratuitious violence. We did do LOTR movies but and we'll do history channel stuff on war but as for things slasher films, NO.

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Here's the best way I can describe what we watch/allow our kids to watch, in regards to entertainment.

 

If Christ was alive in body on the earth, sitting next to me on the couch, would I feel completely comfortable watching what I'm watching? If not, then I shouldn't be watching it. (Because if the Holy Spirit lives inside me, then the Lord IS watching what I'm watching, iykwim.) And therefore, my children shouldn't be watching it, either. We do not have a 'This is ok for mommy and daddy to watch for entertainment, but not you kids' thing at our house. Either the program is appropriate entertainment, or it's not.

 

Which basically means we watch very little tv or movies.

 

Now, we have a slightly different way of thinking regarding things we watch not for entertainment, but for information. For example, the evening news. Dh and I may decide to watch a news program, but wouldn't likely let the little boys sit and watch it with us. There are regularly things on the news that we don't feel are age appropriate for them yet.

 

That's how it works for us.

 

This is very similar to how we do things, although DH still has a little ways to go on this issue. We do have "grown up only" shows, but not because I think something is inappropriate, but because I think the kids might be too young for something that may upset them. For instance, we have The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe on DVD, but the children are not allowed to watch it because I know the witch would scare my son. When he's ready though, I'd have no problem with him watching it. DH likes to watch Cops. I don't think this show is inappropriate, but it includes things that I don't want to explain to a 5 and 4 year old yet. When they are a little older and can understand more, I wouldn't have a problem letting them watch it. For them, we generally stick to G rated things. We avoid things with unnecessary violence and disrespectful attitudes towards adults or others.

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I'm the complete opposite! We're teaching our children that sex is pretty darn cool - WHEN YOU'RE OLD ENOUGH and we'll get more into that as they get older.

 

But violence? No. We don't do gratuitious violence. We did do LOTR movies but and we'll do history channel stuff on war but as for things slasher films, NO.

 

I'm not so sure that most films these days would depict s&x as a wonderful, intimate expression of love between two consenting adults.

 

One of the reasons I take such content into consideration when looking at which films I allow my kids to watch.

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We let our kids watch many PG-13 things even when they were much younger. The basic guideline was that fantasy or battle violence was OK, but any of the other things to cause PG-13 weren't (s*x, nudity, language, gang violence). So that made Lord of the Rings acceptable. :D

 

Our dd is 18 now so she can see whatever she wants, but we have asked her to make wise choices. My dh and I have never been big fans of R-rated movies for ourselves, and we've explained why, so I hope she's taken that to heart.

 

 

This is us too.

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I was just thinking about what different parents censor in regards to TV/movies. Is it as clear cut as going by G, PG, PG-13, R and age, or more like we don't allow sensuality or sexual innuendo or violence or bloody violence or zombies, etc. Maybe you allow some PG-13 with kids under 13, but no bloody violence or sensuality? And so on.

 

Just curious. :001_smile:

 

We generally pre screen everything.

If it has a G rating, we don't bother prescreening. :D

PG we don't necessarily pre screen, depending on what I find out on Plugged In. Sometimes I'll change my mind after we watch it (if I originally thought it would be too much, from the review). Other times not (obviously).

When we watch them ourselves, we basically just keep language, s*x/innuendo, and bloody violence in mind. For example, we watched Thor for ourselves, loved it and decided it would be fine for the boys, and took them to see it when it hit the dollar theater. When we saw Iron Man, we determined that it was not appropriate for them. We didn't see Captain America in theaters, but when we did watch it we also decided it wasn't appropriate for them.

So it just varies. They haven't seen anything R. They haven't watched LOTR. But they've seen all the Star Wars movies. :)

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We are more liberal than some, not as liberal as others. Like most things in our family, we're pretty much middle path.

With movies, that means some PG13. Fantasy violence is fine (so most Xmen, Thor, Iron Man, etc). Some of these movies also have a few questionable scenes. I just fast forward the 2 minutes here and there. Doesn't detract from the story at all. Ds11 has watched the first couple Twilights with me. We watch all the Harry Potters. Goonies is fine, too.

I have no problems with language. They've heard it all (from me!) and are at an age where they know better than repeat it. So, I would have been fine with letting them watch The King's Speech if I thought they would have been interested in it.

I don't do bloody violence, movies about deep, deep subject matters like war, child abuse, etc. No frontal nudity and no s*x scenes. They kids ask when they can watch a certain movie. I usually say 14-16.

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yeah it really depends on the show-I let zach watch some pg13 things but it just really depends (language-"real violence"-sexual inuendos)----hard to explain-we went to see the pirates of caribbean last year and I was afraid it would be too much for him and he's still talking about how he liked it....sometimes even cartoons have things in them that I don't want ds exposed to.....

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We don't do movies that use the R word.

 

I don't censor ds17 movie watching, except he has no job and must ask for movie money, so he doesn't go often.

 

I haven't had to censor dd14 movie watching. I'd probably not let her see a horror movie.She's never asked to do that.

 

Ds10 watches mostly G and PG animated films.

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I don't have any little kids. My youngest is 15. At home, we don't watch sex themed shows or shows with lots of sexual innuendos. We do watch some shows which show natural or legal consequences like COps where the johns are being arrested or where the prostitutes are being arrested. OR some shows like World's Dumbest Car chases which again show natural consequences. None of us like stupid sex comedies so we don't watch anything like that. All those movies that have tons of sex jokes and poo and pee and vomit jokes are not ones we watch. We have no problems with war movies or thrillers.

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We don't go by ratings here. Dds have watched some R movies. We don't watch anything with gore or heavy, true to life violence. We don't do anything that's heavy sexually. We don't do any horror although they do like the Paranormal Activity movies. The paranormal stuff doesn't faze them because they feel it's all so fake. It has the most/worst swearing of any they've watched but they know all those words and I've never heard them say them and they know they shouldn't.

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We don't do movies that use the R word.

 

I don't censor ds17 movie watching, except he has no job and must ask for movie money, so he doesn't go often.

 

I haven't had to censor dd14 movie watching. I'd probably not let her see a horror movie.She's never asked to do that.

 

Ds10 watches mostly G and PG animated films.

 

:confused: What's the R word?

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With our daughter, we always said we censored for quality more than for content. If it was a quality film and she had interest, we pretty much allowed her to watch. She never liked anything with much violence or cruelty. So, we never worried much about her.

 

For my son, we've had to be more careful, specifically about violence or even lots of "action" in films. We notice a distinct difference in his behavior when he watches violent or weapon-heavy movies or TV shows and have to weigh carefully what is appropriate. He has also always been more sensitive to creepy or scary films.

 

I can't recall any instance in which we censored for what I would term "healthy" sexuality. As long as the intimacy featured or implied is consensual and not too graphic, it has never bothered us. As my husband puts it: We hope with all our hearts that neither of our children ever has a reason to kill or seriously harm another living being, but we do hope they have healthy, happy sex lives in their adulthood. That hope colors all of our decisions about media.

 

We're also relatively unconcerned about "language" in films. Our kids know those words exist, and they know it's not considered polite to say them in every situation. But, as far as I'm concerned, they're just words.

 

We've never relied much on MPAA ratings. Instead, we usually look up reviews of films on sites like www.screenit.com, which give details about the potentially problematic content in a movie. Then, we can decide whether a particular films is appropriate for either or both of our kids.

 

Of course, our daughter is now pretty much beyond asking for our approval or permission to see a movie.

Edited by Jenny in Florida
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For me it's more about context and intent.

 

I'm not a fan of gratuitious, but in general I don't mind relevant smatterings of innuendo, nud!ty, language, gore, violence, or vices (drug$, etc.) We see and listen to lots of Broadway, which exposes the kids to much of the above in one form or another but not in a gratuitious way. We discuss context a lot. We also discuss when it is and isn't appropriate to sing Broadway songs (around most of our homeschooling friends, it's a no-no, but when vacuuming or showering? Have at it!)

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We have littles. My oldest is 7yo and she is very sensitive. They watch mostly G rated, and even some of those do not work out due to mean people or scary scenes. She has not even watched several of the Disney princess movies because she cannot handle the bad character. My boys seem less bothered by intense scenes (they are 3 and 5yo), but we watch as a family, so it has to work out for all. They all like watching anything Jane Austen with Mom, though:lol:

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I'm not so sure that most films these days would depict s&x as a wonderful, intimate expression of love between two consenting adults.

 

One of the reasons I take such content into consideration when looking at which films I allow my kids to watch.

 

Really? I can think of about 20 right off the top of my head. What the heck are you watching? :lol:

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I don't like women acting like bimbos, the wrinkliest old men getting the hot young chick (really not pleased when Warren Beatty or R. DeNiro with neck waddles of age still getting the 19 year old), glorifying the suffering of drug addicts (e.g. Sid and Nancy .... they were just stupid), whiz/bang non-stop computer generated action, or weepy sufferers who are their own worst enemy being portrayed sympathetically. I care less who Frenches whom, who dies, or if there is a bloody sword involved.

 

If it is mindless, I prefer it to be comedy.

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Generally speaking I stick to the age guidelines for TV, Movies and books. Music is whatever I find acceptable. Pretty soon my daughter is going to start putting lyrics together and I'm going to have to explain a lot of Tori Amos music! LOL

 

Since my daughter is only eleven she hasn't seen many PG-13 movies. She's seen the most recent Start Trek movie once, Harry Potter movies too many times to count, and the Twilight movies all once.

 

One big area I was not too good about was TV. I still won't watch Criminal Minds around her, but she was raised with CSI in the background (original only). One time when she was four she took a DNA swab from me with a q-tip/ She even bagged it!

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I answered a similar question from a previous thread this way:

 

This is a hard one to explain for me because we are sort of all over the place.

 

1. I can live with profanity (words are just words) EXCEPT when they use G-d Da--. I hate that. That's when words are NOT just words.

 

2. I can live with "fantasy" violence. My kids have seen LOTR. But not blood and gore violence like the Saw movies. Those are pointless and disgusting.

 

3. I am most strict about sex. I do not believe in "awakening" those desires before their time. The last thing my 13yo hormones-raging ds needs to watch is a movie with sex scenes. He is trying to keep his thoughts pure and it is my job to help him.

 

4. I also have issues with and will not allow tv shows/movies that portray the father as a bumbling but lovable idiot with a long-suffering wife who just smirks at what a moron he is. I am trying to raise boys into godly men who will lead their family and these shows don't help.

 

 

.

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For us it has really depended on the movie and what was the purpose/theme. There were some G rated movies that I didn't want my preteen seeing because of the theme.

 

NOW the bigger issue for one of my kids is how he reacts to "spiritual" things and how it may affect him more emotionally. There are just some movies that child should never ever see that may never affect other people. I really have talked to him about it. BUT alas he is now an adult so what do I know. Except he has called me in the last year, asking for prayers since he went to a stupid movie that he shouldn't have even looked at the stinking commercials.

 

 

For a semi example. Hotel Rwanda. We were missionaries in Uganda. We went to orphanages, we held babies, we loved on the children. I knew that whole movie would have a huge negative affect on him. He finally did watch it, but he was probably in college before he saw it.

 

OH another one was Simon birch, OH my that was a rough one.

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I answered a similar question from a previous thread this way:

 

This is a hard one to explain for me because we are sort of all over the place.

 

1. I can live with profanity (words are just words) EXCEPT when they use G-d Da--. I hate that. That's when words are NOT just words.

 

2. I can live with "fantasy" violence. My kids have seen LOTR. But not blood and gore violence like the Saw movies. Those are pointless and disgusting.

 

3. I am most strict about sex. I do not believe in "awakening" those desires before their time. The last thing my 13yo hormones-raging ds needs to watch is a movie with sex scenes. He is trying to keep his thoughts pure and it is my job to help him.

oh my this was an issue for us in that Simon Birch movie, they showed it at church one Sunday. We did watch it with our son at home alone. And the sexual overtones were just too much for the pre teen nevertheless all the other issues that movie had for him.

4. I also have issues with and will not allow tv shows/movies that portray the father as a bumbling but lovable idiot with a long-suffering wife who just smirks at what a moron he is. I am trying to raise boys into godly men who will lead their family and these shows don't help.

 

 

.

Oh that is a pet peeve of mine too. I hate Chitty Chitty Bang Bang now as an adult. LOVED THE BOOK whish is so much better

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I am pretty lax about movies. No violence or horror. No graphic or crude sex or sexual inuendos. I am ok with brief passive nudity, people being shown in bed today as long as it is not very steamy. Allusion to sex such as Kitty and Red constantly running upstairs on the '70s Show are perfectly acceptable.

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Recently I let my 10 and 12 years olds watch The Help and King's Speech both are rated R I believe...def some deep stuff and language issues. A week or so later a friend very much wanted my 10 year son to watch Transformers. The only one available in our little town was the second one, I think. We had never previously watched any of the Transformer movies. I turned it off. My stomache was upset. I was apalled. It was raunchy, for lack of a better word (I should say in my opinion). It wasn't the language or the adult themes, in my opinion, it was just mindless raunch for no other purpose but to be crude and shocking and, I suppose, funny...which it wasn't. Making fun of suicide, horrible name calling, etc.....

 

 

I only allowed my children to watch the Incredibles once....the dad put his hands on a woman, a much smaller woman and he lied to his wife....I just felt like those were serious issues that weren't taken seriously......

 

so, I guess for us it is not about rating but about purpose of the film. Our time is so very limited that at the end of the movie I want to feel uplifted, or smarter, or kinder, or more understanding, or thoughtful...not yucky, confused, dazed, mindless........

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I believe she was referring to Retard used in a derogatory way.

 

Yes. I don't have a problem with the full term used in a clinical manner, but the current slang is hurtful to a large group of people.

 

if we go to movie where the N word is used I will discuss the context with dc. Oldest was 12 when we saw Glory Road and we discussed the context ahead of time.

Edited by betty
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