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Are Cotillions only for the weathy?


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No, they aren't. My dc have been in two - one in a previous city, and one in the area we live now.

 

The first one was sponsored by a dance studio which had a ballroom. They had a short series - 2-3 events per year, I think. They went over some basic etiquette rules - meet & greet type of stuff. And then they were taught very basic dance moves, and danced the rest of the evening.

 

The other one had 7 events per season. It followed a similar format. Teens from all walks of life were enrolled; it wasn't just for the wealthy. That said, however, it was expensive - about $200 per child per season. PLUS the cost of clothes. We were lucky that someone gave us a suit for ds' first year, and his second year he could wear one of dh' suits. For my dd it was trickier - she didn't want to wear the same dress every time, plus sometimes it was formal, sometimes semi-formal, and sometimes there was a theme. So she did a mix of new, borrowed, thrift-store, and home-sewn to have a variety of dresses for the 3 years she was in it. That's why when my dd graduated last year, I was a little relieved when my ds said he didn't want to do it. $200 saved for me. :)

 

Girls tend to enjoy it more than boys - but we know families with boys who love it. I think it's worth a try.

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Or a one time dance?

 

When I was growing up, and still today, there are these weekly classes called "teen cotillion" where one learns to dance and gets to practice social graces. When I was a teen, that meant that the girl (by way of example) had to wear gloves. That's what I most remember - the white gloves! But we also learned to do the fox trot and waltz and to wait to be asked to dance by embarrassed, zitty boys.

 

I remember our instructor telling us over and over how very very grateful we would be in the future when we attended weddings, where passing ability to perform the foxtrot would be mandatory for the well bred.

 

Anyway, I don't think it's really just for the wealthy. I didn't bother with my boys, but I know neighborhood kids and friends of my boys who have done cotillion for a fall or a spring semester, and most of them aren't really "wealthy" (though all of them can obviously afford the classes). I didn't think my boys would enjoy it since most of the kids would be strangers. Pretty much my entire teen cotillion class was kids I knew from school (private). I think a few stray kids from homeschool would have been uncomfortable back then, but today that may be different.

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The price point of a particular cottillion will give you a clue. Some of them are $200-300/season (generally 8 dances) and some are in the thousands.

 

this.

 

DD12 goes to Cotillion - once a month from Sept through Mar - then there is a 'ball.' The cost is $375. and I don't recall the amount to attend the Ball - maybe another $100.

 

Most of the Saturday monthly events are 'formal' and the outfits for that have not been inexpensive - thankfully, I love bargain hunting and I have found her wonderful dresses at huge savings.

 

Family friends sent their now college aged son to Cotillion -- a different one than the one dd goes to. They spent $10k - and that was not including the table they had to pay for at the actual Ball -- If I recall, they had to buy a table for 10 people at something ridiculous like $125 or $250 per person. They, however, didn't even flinch at the cost.

 

It has been great for DD - particularly as a homeschooler -- she has attended with some h/s co-op friends, has met other homeschoolers, has become reacquainted with former lacrosse team mates, has had a ton of fun, has learned that she is an excellent dancer, and has learned and practiced a fair amount of etiquette.

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EK did it the year she turned 13 and she LOVED it. It was through the NLJC (http://www.nljc.com/). We are definitely NOT wealthy; in fact, we are just the opposite. It was a strain for us to come up with the $250 fee. But EK did get to meet with other girls (and a few boys) about her age, and she learned some dances and party etiquette. They met once a month and had two dances, a Winter Ball and a Spring Ball. She thoroughly enjoyed it and wanted to do it another year, but there weren't enough people signed up to have another class.

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this.

 

DD12 goes to Cotillion - once a month from Sept through Mar - then there is a 'ball.' The cost is $375. and I don't recall the amount to attend the Ball - maybe another $100.

 

Most of the Saturday monthly events are 'formal' and the outfits for that have not been inexpensive - thankfully, I love bargain hunting and I have found her wonderful dresses at huge savings.

 

Family friends sent their now college aged son to Cotillion -- a different one than the one dd goes to. They spent $10k - and that was not including the table they had to pay for at the actual Ball -- If I recall, they had to buy a table for 10 people at something ridiculous like $125 or $250 per person. They, however, didn't even flinch at the cost.

 

It has been great for DD - particularly as a homeschooler -- she has attended with some h/s co-op friends, has met other homeschoolers, has become reacquainted with former lacrosse team mates, has had a ton of fun, has learned that she is an excellent dancer, and has learned and practiced a fair amount of etiquette.

 

The one your daughter did is similar to the one we have here. The girls do have to wear different dresses for the two balls as one is semi-formal and one formal. The boys wear a suit for the first, a tux for the second. Major social skills training is involved.

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… I remember our instructor telling us over and over how very very grateful we would be in the future when we attended weddings, where passing ability to perform the foxtrot would be mandatory for the well bred. …

 

You know, inquiring minds want to know - Are you grateful now? As as adult, have you danced the foxtrot at a wedding or other event? Do tell!

 

:bigear:

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