BMW Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 So, this is NOT to negate what others feel who do not relate... because, I, too, used to feel the same way myself... Once upon a time I was a stay at home mom, homeschooling and poured myself out daily in my home for my husband and children... and I thought it was sad that parents would say that they couldn't wait for school to start again... and, truth be told, it is sad... in a way... BUT... several years later... and having 2 sons with adhd (it is hereditary in this case, dh has it and so does grandpa and it can drive several of us batty)... ... and after having children who are in school (I never knew what it was like to have a quiet day alone those many years ago...)... I have to say that just today I said (privately, in my bedroom) that I was ready for school to start again the very day that it got out for Christmas break! I really love my children. I am CRAZY about them. They can break my heart, yet, I still see the best in them and dream for their futures... And while I am glad that my son didn't hear me say that I wished he was still in school... I will say that there are some really great parents out there who do know what it feels like to get excited for school to start because that means they get a break... a break from the kids who have challenges that are difficult to manage and easy to lose patience over... and, perhaps, several teens, all boys by the way, have become bored after several days of sleeping in and nerf guns have lost their charms and maybe mom misses a few hours of quiet.... Anyway, I see BOTH sides. And, after my confession, I will reiterate that I try, very much so, to not say these things out loud to my sons!!!! I love my sons.... I love my sons... I love my sons... (How many days until school starts?) (And when school starts, my one son will have a lot more physical activity and I know that will help him with his male attitudes...) (I think I will send that son on an extended run tomorrow!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatCyndiGirl Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 I get it. I hate the parent-bashing that goes on when people hear that. There were times during this deployment when I seriously reconsidered not homeschooling. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 I can totally relate, just as I could relate to that commercial about "the hap-happiest time of the yeeeeear!" during back to school shopping. I am just about to start on homeschooling, but I've been a SAHM for over 9 years and I absolutely NEEDED this break (having DS in full time ps K) that I've had from September until Christmas. For the past 5 years, I've pretty much done this whole parenting thing on my own. Between work-ups, deployments, trainings, and DH's current job (he has not had leave in THREE years, and rarely has a day off), I've done it ALL ON MY OWN. We do not live close enough to family, and as a matter of fact, we've moved twice in the past three years, so I don't even know anybody well enough to "bug them for help". This past year is the closest I've ever lived to my family by far, and they are still 3 hours away, in another country. If I hadn't had this past couple of months to recharge, I can honestly say that there is no way I would/could even be considering homeschooling, even if it is the best for our family. I have not been a very good mom/wife/person for about a year before that. Burnout. A very real and debilitating condition and not one I ever care to re-visit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pink Fairy Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 I feel you. :grouphug: BUT... I think it is one of those things that should be left unsaid, or only said to a close friend or dh. Or to us. :lol: Not posted on facebook or discussed in front of the kids who are currently making us crazy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
venusmom Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 :001_smile: Makes me smile...I love homeschooling - and I'm very comitted to it so please don't think because of what I'm about to say that I'm not happy doing this...but secretly - how many times I smile inwardly and ask myself if I'm sure I wouldn't enjoy the peace and quiet of sending them to school...but truthfully - it was just as much work when they were in school. There is a lot involved with raising children - however you educate them. When they are in school you have relationships with different teachers to become familiar with, homework, special events, etc, etc, etc. Homeschooling is another huge comittment. Whatever you do - you love your kids and that is what matters. And by the way - teenage boys - oh my...I just got a few out of the house - and as much as I miss them - I'm so glad for the peace...did I just write that? I have two more to go - no idea what I'm in for - but in the meantime - sometimes - I ask myself if I'm sure - wouldn't it be nice to send them to school and at least have an occasional day where I could choose to do something for my dh or me!! Everybody's family is different - I think you should be supported in your endeavors - and keep on loving those boys..I've got 4 and boys are so special to me! Now...my last one - is a little spitfire - and I surely have some adventures ahead with her!! My oldest daughter is a stepdaughter so this is my first go-round with a girl - I didn't get my stepdaughter till she was 15...so I feel like I know boys well and my daughter surprises me all the time!! Just thought I'd say - I'm not in your place, but sometimes it crosses my mind! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BMW Posted December 30, 2011 Author Share Posted December 30, 2011 You see, I totally agree, Momabegood! It's something we think or feel, but I wouldn't purposefully hurt my kiddos with it... But, I see the humor in it... I can laugh about it... even with my kids... because they are at the age now that we all know we irritate each other from time to time and like a break... And... about those boys... yeah... I love 'em.... Like I said, I see both sides.... I used to only see one side... life has a way of teaching us... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unicorn. Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 Totally understand! I also have multiple kids and a dh w/ ad/hd. In fact dh is a ps teacher, so sometimes when I think "I can't wait for school to start back up" it's about him, and not ds! I too had that thought on the first day they were home, but now am wishing I had another week before dh and ds have to go back. Next year I will have 2 in ps, and only one of the twins at home...maybe. I am looking forward to the day when they are all in school, but will also be sad that they are gone. But oh! the quiet, and things staying where you put them, even for a few hours! Yep, I get it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 Yes. Sometimes I'd just like a little break from my kids, especially from dealing with Asperger's. And the fighting over toys. I understand it even more after watching my sister's kids for a week. She has one with autism and who needs surgery for cleft palate but is too skinny for the surgery. She doesn't like to eat, so you basically have to force feed her all day. She has one with ADHD, severe hearing loss and he needs growth hormone shots every day because he's missing a part of his brain that controls growth and impulse control. Her youngest daughter has ADHD, vision problems and a lung disease that requires the same treatments as a person with CF. She also has many processing disorders. One day with them is physically and emotionally draining. She NEEDS them to go to school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassy Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 I find being with my kids much easier now that I am with them all day than I did when they went to school. I've always loved having time to myself, and relished those hours when they were all out at school/nursery. I did not, generally, look forward to picking them up and the aftermath of tired, loud, cross, demanding kids. I can honestly say that now they're at home all day I never, ever think that I'd like a few hours to myself. I'd like a few more hours in each day, that would be nice, but the kids being around all that time no longer bothers me at all. Cassy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iquilt Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 Yes and my solution this year has been a regular sitter who comes once or twice a month. She substitutes and manages a light school load in the morning, then plays games or makes crafts with them in the afternoon. I get some only me shopping, or lunch out, or quiet time at the quilt store and everyone is happy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyfaithe Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 Yes and my solution this year has been a regular sitter who comes once or twice a month. She substitutes and manages a light school load in the morning, then plays games or makes crafts with them in the afternoon. I get some only me shopping, or lunch out, or quiet time at the quilt store and everyone is happy. This is what I do as well. My dd is finally old enough to babysit the younger boys....so I go out once a week....by my very lonesome. Lately, it has been for doctor appointments:glare: But still, I make the best of it...and bring a book:D My kids are growing up and out.....and I realize now how quick it goes. My 4 th ds will graduate this spring.....and my youngest dd will start high school level classes! YIKES!!! Pretty soon, we will have an empty nest...which feels half full already......I am in no rush to see them go. Faithe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ErinE Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 I find being with my kids much easier now that I am with them all day than I did when they went to school. I've always loved having time to myself, and relished those hours when they were all out at school/nursery. I did not, generally, look forward to picking them up and the aftermath of tired, loud, cross, demanding kids. I can honestly say that now they're at home all day I never, ever think that I'd like a few hours to myself. I'd like a few more hours in each day, that would be nice, but the kids being around all that time no longer bothers me at all. Cassy Agreed! What Cassy said! I need and request my alone time, but I prefer our time together now as opposed to dealing with the after school rush. I've found I have more patience. I understand the joys of sending the kids back to school. But like pp said, I can't stand it when parents say such things in front of children. It makes it seem like the kids are such a burden and the parents hate to be around them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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