swimmermom3 Posted November 17, 2011 Share Posted November 17, 2011 Lisa made this comment on another thread: "Approaching this from a different perspective; 1) does your kid get regular, hard exercise? In my experience regular, hard work-outs clear the brain fog of adolescents, and teach them diligence in a way that seat work outs don't. Dh and ds job several times a week. When ds isn't jogging he is more tired, less motivated, more grouchy. 2) does your ds contribute "real" work = real value to your home/life in tangible ways? We've had ample opportunities to show our kids the value of their work in the last couple of years (we heated with wood for ahwile- "every 12" log of ash you haul= 45 min of heat for the house"- that's real world accomplishment. Now we are re-buildling our house- our 11 just primed an entire room alone. He knows he did a real world job. In my experience kids who feel a sense of real world accomplishment (I drywalled part of the basement!) vs. staged accomplishement (I'm on level x of angry birds) have a greater ability to see the need for hard work and what it can earn. My observation is that lots of kids today have a LOT of stuff (middle class rocks) without having to do anything for it. Thier parents have leisure time while earning a decent wage. They have health care and regular vacations and cars that run. What they observe is that a middle class life-style is available to all with little effort." Lisa, I hope I have not put you on the spot, but I would appreciate discussing what you talk about here. For me, it seems very relevant to the problems we are having with our oldest son and to a certain degree with our younger one as well. The thought occurred to me the other day as I was raging (in my mind) about my ds's habits, that he truly has no compelling reason to work hard for anything. I am wondering if we have made life too easy here. My daughter has had times where she has felt like a contributor to the family, but I don't think the boys have had that experience. How does one go about doing that when the kids are in their teens? I think I am asking how one turns a a cruise ship on a dime in the middle of a raging storm? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.