Denisemomof4 Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 you ladies are so kind. Everyone who responded to my thread helped me to be strong, gave me peace, and showed me that I *can* meet with the coaches and not have an anxiety attack. I know I was fuming when I typed my post, and I know I called names. I don't care about the name calling, the coaches ARE b*tches and the kid is a brat. I don't feel bad about saying that at all. But I think I gave the wrong impression. I wasn't going to go in angry, name calling, etc. My post was about my not having an anxiety attack (the crying and shaking I mentioned) because I have such a hard time with confrontation. I feel peace about the meeting but I delayed it at least a week. I've been trying to get my dd in to see a specialist and needed to speak to my pediatrician, and because of my thread, I decided to ask him about dd in the pool. He told me he does not think she should be in the pool at this time. He doesn't feel it's safe. He said it would be best to pull her out until we know what's going on. Because of this, I've delayed the meeting. I have to get a timeline of medical events together for two specialists now, and I also want to prepare for the meeting. I took her out for the day yesterday because we both needed it. We spent the morning crying and we just needed to go away and forget about it all. Dd and I need to sit down and make a list of everything to make sure EVERYTHING is exposed before we leave. Having those cold hearted b*tches treat a SICK kid they way they did is incomprehensible. If you all could pray for us, I would really appreciate it. I really need good doctors for my dd. Her pediatrician is wonderful, but he is limited with what he can do for us. I need the specialists to helps us. I feel confident her issues aren't life threatening, but I do need doctors to properly diagnose, treat, and follow up with what's going on with her. Her weakness and shortness of breath is new, I need answers for this. I will keep all you wonderful ladies updated here. When we have our meeting, I'll let you know. If I find anything else out, I'll let you know. If you could pray for dd and I, I would really appreciate it. We both are very emotional. She's giving up her passion. She has always told me how she "feels alive, like she can do anything" in the water, how she wishes she could live in the water, that she's going to do synchro until she's out of high school or college, etc. This really meant a lot to her. I'm sad for her, but I'm also just so sad that I haven't been able to get her proper help yet. Please pray for us that I finally do. I am struggling with my faith, or lack thereof, but I don't know what else to do other than ask people to pray for us. Thank you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
celticmom Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 :grouphug: Denise, it is hard to give up a much loved sport. We had to take dd9 out of gymnastics because of finances and I know others who have had to give sports up because of serious injury. It is a grieving process. But in our own situation with dd, I've seen how God has taught us and dd through the situation and is now blessing her in other ways. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mabeline Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 Praying for you and your daughter. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted November 10, 2011 Author Share Posted November 10, 2011 :grouphug: Denise, it is hard to give up a much loved sport. We had to take dd9 out of gymnastics because of finances and I know others who have had to give sports up because of serious injury. It is a grieving process. But in our own situation with dd, I've seen how God has taught us and dd through the situation and is now blessing her in other ways. :grouphug: I do remember that. I'm sorry. :sad: I told dd that we will do other things that will make her happy. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clarkacademy Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 That is so sad! i am so sorry. Will she still be able to go swimming though at all? I mean on her terms just for fun not a team thing with coaches just swimming? I hope so because it sounds like when she is able she really enjoys it. I hope the docs get things figured out and you and your daughter are all right. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted November 10, 2011 Author Share Posted November 10, 2011 (edited) That is so sad! i am so sorry. Will she still be able to go swimming though at all? I mean on her terms just for fun not a team thing with coaches just swimming? I hope so because it sounds like when she is able she really enjoys it. I hope the docs get things figured out and you and your daughter are all right. no. The environment has become too hostile for her. I can't subject her to it, at least not for now. When we do have the meeting, I'm telling the coach and her supervisor that my dd will be back in the fall, but she won't be. I think I'm going to send the team an informational good-bye, telling everyone that dd is dropping out for health reasons for now, that anyone can contact her if they wish, but that also she had a very tough time with bad treatment and bullying by both a coach and a teammate, and if anyone witnessed anything, please either speak to the head coach or send in a note with a very detailed account of what they saw. I need to sit on this for a few days, though, because I do know I'm highly emotional about it all right now. I just can't believe an adult bullied a sick child and allowed their little brat to do the same. Edited November 10, 2011 by Denisemomof4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avila Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 I am sorry, Denise. I hope you get answers about her health issues and that she feels better soon. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKapers Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 Denise, I am glad you are getting support and looking into things with a doctor. It sounds so hard everything that is going on right now. :grouphug::grouphug: I am sorry that your daughter has to quit doing what she loves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Rain Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 I was just checking in to see how the meeting went. I hope this will be a time of healing for your dd and for you. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted November 10, 2011 Author Share Posted November 10, 2011 I was just checking in to see how the meeting went. I hope this will be a time of healing for your dd and for you. :grouphug: thank you so much. I delayed the meeting until next week so I could work on her medical timeline the doctors requested. I am really starting to think that I'm going to type everything out and have dh handle the meeting without me. I really don't want to see anyone there. I had so much peace about it until I had to delay the meeting. The way the supervisor is wording her words now is really starting to tick me off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clarkacademy Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 (edited) no. The environment has become too hostile for her. I can't subject her to it, at least not for now. When we do have the meeting, I'm telling the coach and her supervisor that my dd will be back in the fall, but she won't be. I think I'm going to send the team an informational good-bye, telling everyone that dd is dropping out for health reasons for now, that anyone can contact her if they wish, but that also she had a very tough time with bad treatment and bullying by both a coach and a teammate, and if anyone witnessed anything, please either speak to the head coach or send in a note with a very detailed account of what they saw. I need to sit on this for a few days, though, because I do know I'm highly emotional about it all right now. I just can't believe an adult bullied a sick child and allowed their little brat to do the same. I am so sorry. I know how you feel. It is no fun at all to be the kid who is bullied. I hope you guys can find something she enjoys as much if not more. I try to think these things happen for a reason and just maybe she will find another hobby and a talent that will be more meaningful for her. I am just so sorry. Edited November 10, 2011 by clarkacademy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted November 10, 2011 Author Share Posted November 10, 2011 I am so sorry. I know how you feel. It is no fun at all to be the kid who is bullied. I hope you guys can find something she enjoys as much if not more. I try to think these things happen for a reason and just maybe she will find another hobby and a talent that will be more meaningful for her. I am just so sorry. thank you. You're really so sweet. Can you please go back and edit my quote and take dd's name out? I hate it when I do that. ;) Today is a tough day. I look at this beautiful child with a heart bigger than the universe and it KILLS me that someone could treat her so badly and get away with it, both a child AND adult bullying her. I don't know how to take her pain away. She wants synchro so badly. We have friends there. But even once her medical issues are helped (hopefully solved) I just can't see allowing her being subjected to that coach and her kid again. :sad: She doesn't want to join the team 45 minutes away. She has seen their conduct and really......... it's just not worth it. I've seen the coaches scream and cry while in the midst of hundreds of people.:glare: I know it will get better with time, but this is very, very difficult. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clarkacademy Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 thank you. You're really so sweet. Can you please go back and edit my quote and take dd's name out? I hate it when I do that. ;) Today is a tough day. I look at this beautiful child with a heart bigger than the universe and it KILLS me that someone could treat her so badly and get away with it, both a child AND adult bullying her. I don't know how to take her pain away. She wants synchro so badly. We have friends there. But even once her medical issues are helped (hopefully solved) I just can't see allowing her being subjected to that coach and her kid again. :sad: She doesn't want to join the team 45 minutes away. She has seen their conduct and really......... it's just not worth it. I've seen the coaches scream and cry while in the midst of hundreds of people.:glare: I know it will get better with time, but this is very, very difficult. YAY I did it!!! I figured it to be much more difficult LOL! I am sure this coach has been a bully before, as her child. Those types of people don't do it as a one time thing so who knows, maybe next semester she will no longer be there. While I know your dd has health issues I have two that are special needs so I know how it feels for a kid to get bullied when they just can't help things. I hope something comes up for her i really do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted November 11, 2011 Author Share Posted November 11, 2011 YAY I did it!!! I figured it to be much more difficult LOL! I am sure this coach has been a bully before, as her child. Those types of people don't do it as a one time thing so who knows, maybe next semester she will no longer be there. While I know your dd has health issues I have two that are special needs so I know how it feels for a kid to get bullied when they just can't help things. I hope something comes up for her i really do. thank you so much! I'm sorry you know what this feels like. This coach and her kid were in a similar predicament last year but I don't know the details. I do think she's learned her lesson this time............ at my dd's expense. Thanks again!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted November 11, 2011 Share Posted November 11, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kim in Appalachia Posted November 11, 2011 Share Posted November 11, 2011 :grouphug: I hope you get answers in regard to her medical issues and I hope you are able to come to some sort of resolution with the people at swimming. Praying for peace. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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