LauraGB Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 Often we hear that if one has a few drinks with dinner or after, and they do it often, they are alcoholics, or even useless alcoholics. This is not necessarily so. There is a vast difference between that person and the alcoholic. Or maybe not. Generally, from my experience with numerous family members and friends, an alcoholic almost always has some tragedy or ultra sensitivity they are trying to soothe. They are the ones who feel things just a little more than other people, they are the ones who just can't quite "get it", they are the ones who have had something terrible happen that they just haven't been able to deal with. An alcoholic has trouble coping with day to day life because of these troubles, and they begin diluting life's edgy feeling first thing upon waking. Alcohol is a way for these people to do what so many others do with a more acceptable "prescription" from a doctor (who, of course, knows how to treat these sorts of problems). Is alcoholism a disease? Of course. But it doesn't start out as one, any more than a dependency on rx drugs start out as one. It starts out as an easily recognizable symptom of something else...but because alcohol has been so demonized, the alcohol itself becomes the "treatable" problem, even though in the beginning it is far from that, and the real problem gets buried (just like the drinker wants it to). And by then, they have no desire to come back from the numbness. Today my uncle passed away from the effects of alcoholism - he was not the first to do so in my family, nor will he be the last. And I hear so many people say how sad it is that he "drank himself to death". But they all forget that he could have taken a different road and used any manner of prescribed drugs, prescribed by a "professional" in the area of psychological disorders big and small, and when his liver ceased to work because of those meds, no one would be making any sort of negative connection. I just really want to share this. So many, from both sides of my family, have died from the effects of alcoholism, and I'm quite certain several more will before my life is over. The problem is that all of these people have a similar trait of not being able to deal with things - an uber-sensitivity to things, trauma with which they were never really equipped to deal. Before you judge someone who drinks from sun up to sun down, consider why they might do this - who would actually "want" to live like that? Thanks for letting me vent a bit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadianmumof5 Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 :grouphug: I understand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lara in Colo Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 I agree. I knew the minute my brother became sober and had licked his alcohol problems. I spoke to him on the phone and it was as if he had a new personality! Whatever demon he needed to face (not always defeat) he was facing it instead of hiding. He had changed, and had become stonger. Lara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OLG Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 Points well taken. I 'get it'. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen in PA Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Another Jen Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 Vent away. You have put my thoughts into words. We too have many alcoholics on both sides of the family. It's not an easy road. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KathyBC Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 I agree, it can be a form of self-medication. It would be great if eveyone's focus was the real issues, rather than the alcohol use. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alenee Posted November 10, 2011 Share Posted November 10, 2011 :grouphug: My mom is a functional alcoholic. I remember the day I had to stand up to her and tell her that dealing with problems did not mean ignoring them and drinking. It means facing them head-on until they aren't problems any longer. THEN you can move on. This was my speech about why I was writing about my past. She couldn't handle it. She wished I could just "deal with it"...but I couldn't deal with it in her way... I had to face it ALL. I love her so much and wish that she could learn to face her own demons. I don't think alcohol would be that big of a problem anymore if she could do that. :crying: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraGB Posted November 10, 2011 Author Share Posted November 10, 2011 Thank you. And lots of :grouphug: to you all who understand what I'm saying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleIzumi Posted November 11, 2011 Share Posted November 11, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Alcoholism has caused much tragedy in my family line as well. We also definitely have some mental illnesses in our bloodline that require some medication, and often self-medication is the first choice. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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