kfeusse Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 have the same number of gifts for each child? OR spend the same amount for each reguardless of the number of gifts? My kids are 7, 9 and 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Marple Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 When our kids were young and didn't understand the concept of money, we just bought whatever we wanted. Once they were old enough to understand, we decided to spend the same amount of money. The ages really made a difference, though, because when ds1 was 12 his youngest brother was 6. The 6 year old was into quantity and the 12 year old was into quality. So for the 6 yo we just got a lot of "stuff" and in reality it amounted to less money than what we got for the older boys. Now that they are much older, we go by the "spend the same amount" rule. Interestingly, though, they are now getting to the point that they don't really care a lot about gifts but would prefer a family gift such as a ski vacation, pool table, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AK_Mom4 Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Actually, neither. When the olders were little, they often shared a larger family-type gift and that worked well. Now that they are older, they usually get their own gifts. I have a budget for gifts, but I don't divvy it up equally or make sure they all have the same number of items. I try to buy something that each person will enjoy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amy g. Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Neither. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danybug Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 I was just pondering this the other night. I focus more on spending the same. But I was thinking about it, because with my oldest 11, obviously he has very little for the same amount of money. I am counting on him being able to see that. :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayne J Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Mine are young enough that same number is the most important thing. They can count, but have little idea how much things cost. (Generally though, we end up at about the same amount spent on each child.) Later when they begin to understand money better, we'll switch to the same amount of money each. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pam L in Mid Tenn Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Same number of gifts. Approximately same $ spent. Within $10. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeaganS Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Yeah, mine are so little that I just buy them what I want them to have and they pretty much share it anyways. I think I have a few more years of that. After that...I don't know. I'm having a hard time thinking of things for my 1 year old because she doesn't care and is just as happy playing with big sister's toys. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evergreen State Sue Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 When the kids are young, the number is important. There is nothing worse than having one kid open a gift while another is just sitting there noticing they don't have anything else left to open. I always tried to have them open like things at the same time - clothes, video, special gift, gift cards. Now that our kids are in their teens, the same quantity isn't as important. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenny in Florida Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 We try to make sure there are roughly the same number of packages under the tree. I've honestly never added up or compared the total amount of money spent on each one. I suspect it comes out fairly close, but it's not especially intentional. Usually what happens is that my husband and I buy stuff and tuck it all away in our closet(s). Sometime before we put up the tree, we sit together and survey everything we have on hand. We divide it up into packages for each kid, combining similar items or wrapping individual things separately so that it works out to the same number of things for each one to open. We wrap a few things at that time, because our tradition is to put one or two presents under the tree each night from the time it goes up until the 23rd. Then, we put the rest out after the kids are in their rooms on Christmas Eve. We always intend to do more wrapping ahead of time, but usually end up sitting up late on the 24th finishing. At that point, we check the balance of packages one last time and adjust if necessary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silliness7 Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 We do the whole 3 gifts thing from the Three Wise Men's gifts. I heard that somewhere way back when and thought it was a cute idea. Also thought it was a good way for me to control myself as I tend to get a little nutso at Christmas. So they have the same number of gifts. I am a bargain hunter extraordinaire as well so the gifts will not total the same. But I do try to make them the same value regardless of what I spent on the thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2squared Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Neither. We try to get all the items at the top of their lists (after brainwashing them so their lists are reasonable). We use fabric bags for the gifts, so some bags have more in them, and some have less. All the dc usually have a similar amount of filled bags. Many gifts (usually the most expensive) are left unwrapped under the tree so they are family gifts. I expect this year we won't have many individual gifts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plucky Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 We do same number of gifts here. We each take turns opening presents, and ooh and ahh. It would be awkward to have to skip someone. I do try to make the dollar amounts fairly equal, but the older kids are always going to have the most expensive gifts. My kids get this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 We usually have the same number of gifts per child for the younger set: A small gift from Santa and a couple gifts from Mom and Dad. The teens, we try to spend approximately the same amount, but I am more interested in getting thoughtful gifts than in making sure that everything is exactly "fair" (whatever that is). :) Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plucky Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 We usually have the same number of gifts per child for the younger set: A small gift from Santa and a couple gifts from Mom and Dad. The teens, we try to spend approximately the same amount, but I am more interested in getting thoughtful gifts than in making sure that everything is exactly "fair" (whatever that is). :) Cat You can do both. :) I try to keep things fair, but it will never happen completely. I also buy very thoughtful gifts. I start planning early and have everything done by Thanksgiving so I can give more of a non-stressed mom to my kids. It all works out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 You can do both. :) I try to keep things fair, but it will never happen completely. I also buy very thoughtful gifts. I start planning early and have everything done by Thanksgiving so I can give more of a non-stressed mom to my kids. It all works out. I do think I do both :) : Try to make sure things are balanced and thoughtful. I just let go of the idea that I have to count gifts or spend exactly the same amount of dollars. I realized that if my focus is on making sure no one feels cheated or let down at Christmastime, that will be their focus too. Sounds like we shop the same too! There is too much to do and enjoy at Christmastime to spend the time shopping and wrapping. My Christmas closet is getting full. Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plucky Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 I do think I do both :) : Try to make sure things are balanced and thoughtful. I just let go of the idea that I have to count gifts or spend exactly the same amount of dollars. I realized that if my focus is on making sure no one feels cheated or let down at Christmastime, that will be their focus too. Sounds like we shop the same too! There is too much to do and enjoy at Christmastime to spend the time shopping and wrapping. My Christmas closet is getting full. Cat Yep, the only bad thing I experience is I sometimes want to buy something else in Dec. Ugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kfeusse Posted November 8, 2011 Author Share Posted November 8, 2011 Yep, the only bad thing I experience is I sometimes want to buy something else in Dec. Ugh. THAT has always been my problem too...and more often than not it is becasue of you gals find the coolest thing that one of my kids would LOVE and I can't not get it....so then I am off to try to "equate" it with the other 2 kids...so, STOP sharing all of the great ideas AFTER Thanksgiving...do it BEFORE!!!!:001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dakarimom5 Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 I usually end up buying 3 of the same thing for all my boys. Last year it was DSI XL's. DD had more under the tree but it didn't even come close to the amount spent on the boys. This year I'm trying to not spend more than $100 on each, not including all the educational games and books in my amazon cart right now;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rafiki Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer3141 Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 I do the same number of boxes. There are times when I cram something into a box to make it fit with something else. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plucky Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 Same number of presents to open. We open gifts one at a time so everyone can see and the present opening lasts. We do 12 presents each, only 3 are "bigger" the rest are more stocking stufferish. The things my youngest enjoys do not cost a lot, we put the money not spent on Christmas towards something bigger for his birthday a week later. Do you guys forgo the stocking then? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shinyhappypeople Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 have the same number of gifts for each child? OR spend the same amount for each reguardless of the number of gifts? My kids are 7, 9 and 11 Same number of gifts. Bonus points if they're also similar size. Dollar amount doesn't matter at all. My DDs are 6 and 8, fwiw. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 when my kids were young, I could "spend the same/same number of gifts". I just had one (ahem) child say s/he wanted to go back to that system. I said it wasn't practical. I do try to spend "about" the same. I try to have similar numbers of items in the stockings. they're old enough, sometimes school/other needs are given as gifts and that can vary between kids. Last year, one received a gift that was equal to several years worth of entire christmas budgets (and that was a discounted rate :eek:) - but it was a *very* important gift for that particular child and will go with him the rest of his life. my husband will do what he wants and doesn't seem to care about budgets sometimes. (since he's the finance whiz, he can get away with it.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rwjx2khsmj Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 I try for both. Obviously the more I spend on one gift, the less I can spend on others. Last year, my olders got several presents that were much less costly, like socks and lipgloss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kari C in SC Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 We try to make sure there are roughly the same number of packages under the tree. I've honestly never added up or compared the total amount of money spent on each one. I suspect it comes out fairly close, but it's not especially intentional. Usually what happens is that my husband and I buy stuff and tuck it all away in our closet(s). Sometime before we put up the tree, we sit together and survey everything we have on hand. We divide it up into packages for each kid, combining similar items or wrapping individual things separately so that it works out to the same number of things for each one to open. We wrap a few things at that time, because our tradition is to put one or two presents under the tree each night from the time it goes up until the 23rd. Then, we put the rest out after the kids are in their rooms on Christmas Eve. We always intend to do more wrapping ahead of time, but usually end up sitting up late on the 24th finishing. At that point, we check the balance of packages one last time and adjust if necessary. This would be me. Sometimes I spend more on one kid than another, sometimes it is pretty even. I don't do the exact number of gifts, but somewhere close. It all works itself out. I do the survey of gifts staring in September because my two youngest have birthdays a day a part at the end of Sept./beginning of Oct. When I am pulling out their birthday gifts - I will start to take notice of what I have been putting away for Christmas too. I have been known to have too much stuff for Christmas and stash some of it away for Easter! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misidawnrn Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 In the past, I just bought "stuff" to fill the space under the tree. My 7 year old would play with the first 2-3 things then didn't care about the rest. 2yo doesn't care either way. This year I am adopting a policy that I saw on here. Something you want, something you need, something you wear and something you read. I love the idea! In fact, I am almost done already. I am not doing this with my 2 step daughters though because they get gift cards to the mall every year and they LOVE that. I have no fricken idea on what to buy a 19 and 17yo girls so they get that and love it. (we discussed this when their dad and I got married and they thought it was great) My oldest son usually gets a gift card also, so he can pick out what he wants...easy peasy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 I've always tried for the same # of gifts. It wouldn't do to have one girl still opening presents while the other one twiddles her thumbs. This is the first year we're setting a $ amount per girl and I'm hoping that the # of presents is pretty even too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joker Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 I usually go for the same number and they usually get three gifts from us. One year older only asked for one thing and it was a bit costly. Younger only wanted one thing and it was super cheap. We purchased what they both wanted and then got older two inexpensive items and purchased younger two nicer things. They would have been pleased with just what they asked for but there were things I wanted to get them.:tongue_smilie: Honestly, I think the gift giving is more for me than them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joker Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 I've always tried for the same # of gifts. It wouldn't do to have one girl still opening presents while the other one twiddles her thumbs. This is the first year we're setting a $ amount per girl and I'm hoping that the # of presents is pretty even too. :D I get each of mine three but still end up with the thumb twiddler. I could probably get younger only one and then they would end at the same time. Younger really likes to draw out the suspense! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sukale Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 Our girls are 13 and 3. The little one gets a lot more gifts. I still spend more on the 13 yr old though. Santa brings them each 1 main gift. This yearr it will be an Ipad and a Leapfrog leappad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eternalknot Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 have the same number of gifts for each child? OR spend the same amount for each reguardless of the number of gifts? My kids are 7, 9 and 11 I don't do either. I just buy what I want to buy, and I don't worry about keeping things fair in terms of amount, money, or appearance. Some years you're on top, some years you're on the bottom; but every year you're thought of and bought for, so you're welcome ;). (That's what I'd say if any of the kids ever commented on the unfairness -which is pretty obvious some years- but none of them ever have. I think not going to school and having most of their friends be extended family -same family culture- helps in that they're not really around people comparing notes and whatnot. It also helps that they're just easygoing kids.) My kids are 6 and 11, and I live with nephews and neices ranging in age from two to the mid-teens that I buy for as though they were my own. My parents did the same thing with us for birthdays and such (we're not Christian) and none of us are scarred over it so I figured I'd continue the tradition LOL. Kids are still young, so the jury is still out on whether it'll prove a success or failure :D. If I were going to chose, though, I think -as a recipient- I'd rather have someone spend the same amount of money than I would want the same number of gifts as someone else. I think it'd be a better value for me in terms of getting what I want rather than getting a token gift that fit into someone's bigger plan, you know? As a gift-giver, though, it'd be way easier to give everyone x-number of gifts: one book, one outfit, one x,y, and z, etc. So my default answer would depend on whichever side I'm on! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan in TN Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 I'll admit that I avoid both like the plague, even though it's hard sometimes. Dh grew up with parents who "had to make sure everything was absolutely equal and the same" for all 4 of their kids. Down to the year they got a bicycle and wedding engagement gifts. You would not believe how even as adults they carefully eye everything that is given/done for their siblings and REMEMBER for a very long time if they are not eventually given something at least equal to it. I was told when we were married some of the things I should be expecting as gifts in the future. It's pathetic. Kids are smart. Adults, sometimes not so much. (In all fairness, dh is not like his siblings, partially due to the fact that he moved far, far away from home as soon as he graduated from high school. :D) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lynn Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 My 2 oldest are old enough to where it just does not matter. My oldest would be fine with 1 envelope with money in it. My middle son would rather have a couple things to open but it would not matter that the 2 youngest had more. My youngest son is 11 but I still match number of gifts to what we get dd(6). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.