scrappyhappymama Posted November 2, 2011 Share Posted November 2, 2011 I have four boys ranging in ages from 2 to 9. While I think your sentiment is sweet, PLEASE DON'T send gifts for all! We are already swimming in gifts year round and having to declutter the toys often with four birthdays and one christmas and other assorted holidays. I already feel badly that my siblings with fewer children have to buy for all of my many children. I'd feel even worse if they were buying even more! I like for our birthday child to feel special on their day. And I think it is a wonderful lesson for his brothers to focus on making it a special day for him and not expect it to be about them! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KarenC Posted November 2, 2011 Share Posted November 2, 2011 Even for young kids, I wouldn't buy a present for each one. Karen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
higginszoo Posted November 2, 2011 Share Posted November 2, 2011 Just the birthday kid. If you bought for all 4 at each birthday, plus Christmas, that's like 20 gifts a year, which is a lot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happyhomemaker Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Birthday kid only. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AHASRADA Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 I am wondering if I should get something small/inexpensive for the other littles while the birthday child gets a birthday present... This. We have done this with our own children's birthdays, as well as those of the nieces and nephews. We do not send gifts to extended family, though. They only get gifts if we happen to be around on or near their birthday. It is so nice for the others to receive a little something, and may well prevent crying and whining from young children who don't understand what it is "fair" for their brother to have a gift on that day and they don't. Yes it does set a precedent, but so what? It's a fun precedent. Now that our dc are older, we don't do as much for birthdays in general, and so the "non-birthday child" only gets a couple very small items. It's more fun to watch them all open a little something on the occasion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garga Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Either way is fine in my book. Aunties are allowed to spoil their nephew/nieces if they want to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LMD Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 I have 3, it would not be necessary. My kids are plenty spoiled, trust me! And it does back fire - ask my mum, unfortunately she set a bit of a precedent and I'm trying to train my 4y/o that it's not appropriate to let the first words out of his mouth be 'what did you bring me?' :rolleyes: The other kids get to have cake too on their siblings birthday, isn't that enough? :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldskool Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 I vote only the B-day kid. It gives the kids a chance to have a day that is set aside just for them. My kids have to share every other day of the year and not having to for just one is kind of nice. IMO, if everybody is getting something the feeling gets a bit lost. Another bonus is that the other (non-birthday) kids get to know that not every event is about them either and sometimes another person gets the limelight. It is character building to let someone else enjoy being special without having to be a part of it. Lesley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twoxcell Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 I would want something for the Birthday child only.;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladydusk Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Please do not send presents to the siblings of the birthday child! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheApprentice Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Birthday kid only. It's their special day. And it will be the other child's special day another time. That's how it's done here. My boys comments are something like, "I can't wait 'til it's my birthday." It gives them something to look forward to and it's O.K. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WeeBeaks Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 My kids are very very used to the birthday kid only receiving gifts on his/her birthday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocketgirl Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 As a parent I expect that only my birthday child would receive presents from family so I do talk with my other children who are young, remind them it is her birthday, etc but I also stash something cool for them at the right moment like a treat bag before the birthday child opens presents at a party, etc. However, I must add that my dear sister, when sending a bday gift, always includes a little something for her siblings, like a pez, or dollar section toy, or coloring book & it is so special. We are states apart so have never :( celebrated my children's birthdays with her (so her package comes in the mail which is super special and even more so because there is a little something in there for everyone!) If she could come to a party, she wouldn't feel that other kids would be missing out because she would see that they are fine, having fun, having treats, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perogi Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Birthday kid only. If you live far away a little note and some stickers just to say hi to the other kids might be fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Birthday kid only...as long as you remember all the kids that year. If you wanted to buy for all, buy for all next time too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abacus2 Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 I agree with birthday kid only. This is partly because the volume of toys already received is overwhelming. For example, in my family, take 3 kids * 2 (birthday and Christmas) * 10 (typical number of gifts per child per occasion throughout the extended family) = at least 60 new toys per year. Add more if we have a birthday party with friends. Don't get me wrong, we are blessed and I appreciate everyone's generosity. However, I have toys overflowing everywhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momofkhm Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Birthday child only. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CalicoKat Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Birthday kid only. :iagree: Yup, the others know their turn will come. They may not like it, but this is life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Only the birthday kid. It really galls me that people think kids are so fragile that they can't handle seeing a sibling get a birthday present if they don't. And we wonder where kids get their entitlement mentality. Tara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 I think kids of any age can learn that sometimes someone else gets something when they don't. Right on. My dd17 was shocked the other day when we were at Target and I picked up a cute t-shirt for dd9 that was on clearance but wasn't going to get something for ds8. I knew dd would love it and the price was right, and I didn't see any reason to balance things by buying something, anything for ds just because dd was getting something. Dd17 said, "That's not fair for ds8." I looked at her and said, "If you still think life is about being fair, you have a lot to learn." I always tell my kids, "Sometimes you get something; sometimes it's your sibling's turn. That's life." They don't necessarily love it, but they don't expect to get stuff just for the sake of "fairness," either. On the rare occasions they whine about fairness, I tell them that next time they will get the exact same item without regard to personality, interest, or desire. That shuts them up right quick! In the end, they had pajama pants on clearance and ds needed a pair, so he got something, too. :001_smile: Tara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LidiyaDawn Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 I think that either option is valid. My boys adore my mom who always gets all three of my boys something on each birthday. She remembers fondly HER aunt who began this tradition when my mom was a little girl. I think that if you want to do that, you should be prepared to start a tradition. But in my mind, it is a good tradition. :) :iagree: It looks like many people are saying "birthday kid only" ~ but I think the important thing here is what YOU and YOUR family like to do. If you want to be the aunt who sends three gifts, then be the aunt who sends three gifts. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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