Missing KC,MO baby

[angela in ohio]

I live locally. There are still several different theories being tossed around.... all centered around either sold by the parents, or dead and the parents were somehow involved.

 

Parents HAVE moved back into the home. That happened a few weeks ago.

 

Parents are not accepting help from anyone. Several others with missing children have offered advice, support.... Lisa's parents have refused it all.

 

Lisa's parents told the people doing prayer vigils to go away.

 

Parents have not participated in ANY of the organized searches by citizens, since day one.

 

The KCPD has disbanded the special investigation group that was originally set up for Lisa's case. They are still working on it, of course, but leads had dropped to a level where they couldn't justify keeping all those officers away from their regular desks anymore.

 

:sad:

 

I really think I would do the same. When you enter the spotlight, even through something as tragic as this, I'm sure everyone wants to think they know you. It would be hard to have so many people in your face, not knowing who to trust and who is going to sell an interview with what you said to them, who just wants to say they are your friend or neighbor, who wants to play amateur detective with you, etc. I know at least in medical tragedies, so many people need to feel like they are "on the inside," and it is more about them and less about the person who is grieving/hurting/fighting for their life.

 

I would also tell the prayer vigil people to leave. How would you know who was there for the prayers and who wanted to harm you (and I'm sure there are plenty of people who want to)? Safer to clear the lawn. People can pray all day in their own home if they want; they aren't telling them not to pray at all.

[HeidiKC]

I really think I would do the same. When you enter the spotlight, even through something as tragic as this, I'm sure everyone wants to think they know you. It would be hard to have so many people in your face, not knowing who to trust and who is going to sell an interview with what you said to them, who just wants to say they are your friend or neighbor, who wants to play amateur detective with you, etc. I know at least in medical tragedies, so many people need to feel like they are "on the inside," and it is more about them and less about the person who is grieving/hurting/fighting for their life.

 

I would also tell the prayer vigil people to leave. How would you know who was there for the prayers and who wanted to harm you (and I'm sure there are plenty of people who want to)? Safer to clear the lawn. People can pray all day in their own home if they want; they aren't telling them not to pray at all.

 

:iagree: Completely. I was reading about one woman who does prayer vigils for any missing kids in the area (I think), and she's been leading these prayer vigils. I'm sure it's coming from a good place, but it seemed a bit odd to me - like she needed to be a part of it, and did not at understand their request for privacy.

[RanchGirl]

I really think I would do the same. When you enter the spotlight, even through something as tragic as this, I'm sure everyone wants to think they know you. It would be hard to have so many people in your face, not knowing who to trust and who is going to sell an interview with what you said to them, who just wants to say they are your friend or neighbor, who wants to play amateur detective with you, etc. I know at least in medical tragedies, so many people need to feel like they are "on the inside," and it is more about them and less about the person who is grieving/hurting/fighting for their life.

 

I would also tell the prayer vigil people to leave. How would you know who was there for the prayers and who wanted to harm you (and I'm sure there are plenty of people who want to)? Safer to clear the lawn. People can pray all day in their own home if they want; they aren't telling them not to pray at all.

 

:iagree: They have other children in the home. If Lisa was kidnapped, how ultra paranoid must they be feeling right now over their other children's safety?

 

I don't mean to insult them, but these parents didn't come off to me as, um, "together" enough to pull off a murder or selling the child without leaving some kind of evidence. Money or physical evidence or something. Was there any evidence of abuse or neglect or serious money issues?

[Donna A.]

Was there any evidence of abuse or neglect or serious money issues?

Serious money issues, yes. They're on welfare, and one reason Deb's still married to her ex-husband (who is NOT Lisa's father) is allegedly because they haven't been able to afford a divorce. (Deb's husband stated that in an interview.)

 

A few facts on their financial status: Deb is related to some very wealthy people in TX, and one of those is married to someone even wealthier who happens to be the benefactor who's offered up the $100,000 reward that's out there, as well as paying for the celebrity lawyer Joe Tacopino and the celebrity PD Bill Stanton (who's really serving more as a PR guy than anything). So as far as Deb and Jeremy being "together enough" to pull off something like a baby sale... by themselves, I'd agree with you, RanchGirl. But she in particular has a loonnngggg history.

 

As far as them being concerned about someone else just trying to make money off an interview.... that's laughable, considering that Deb and Jeremy have gotten paid for every interview they've done with ABC, who has exclusive rights to interviews in this case. And that their lawyer Joe Tacopino "owes ABC a favor". (I personally read about that last statement when I did some research on Joe Tacopino. ABC also had exclusive rights at one point when he got involved with the Joran van der Sloot case in Aruba.)

 

FTR, I didn't say that a baby sale is *my* opinion of what happened, either. OR that if it was a baby sale, that Deb was even involved. Someone asked for an update, so I posted what I know from local chatter, and from a bit of research I've done myself on various people involved. (A baby sale is only ONE of the possibilities. Of course, IIRC, others in this very thread have speculated the same thing.)

 

As far as neglect, the very fact that the baby disappeared (or died?) right from under her nose while she was out on the front porch getting drunk has got to serve as some sort of neglect. And that IS my opinion. :confused:

 

There are a LOT of strange people involved with this family. There are so many possibilities of what could've happened to Lisa.... with or without Deb and Jeremy's involvement.... It's no wonder the local PD had to shut down their special investigation room for this case. (And FTR, I didn't say I blame them.)

 

Hey, I'm just a messenger. Except for one paragraph in this post, I didn't say what MY opinion is on ANY of it at this point in the game. :tongue_smilie:

[Donna A.]

I really think I would do the same. When you enter the spotlight, even through something as tragic as this, I'm sure everyone wants to think they know you. It would be hard to have so many people in your face, not knowing who to trust and who is going to sell an interview with what you said to them, who just wants to say they are your friend or neighbor, who wants to play amateur detective with you, etc. I know at least in medical tragedies, so many people need to feel like they are "on the inside," and it is more about them and less about the person who is grieving/hurting/fighting for their life.

 

I get what you're saying, but do you really think that parents who've lost their own children who are literally knocking on their door offering their advice and support really just want to sell an interview? One woman who lives locally lost both of her children a few years ago when her ex-husband kidnapped and killed them. But she went for TWO YEARS (or thereabouts) not knowing where they were, or whether they were alive or not, before their bodies were found. She was trying to help Deb and Jeremy (assuming their innocence) when the accusations starting flying about them being involved in Lisa's disappearance. She just knocked on their door and asked if she could talk to them. She wanted to encourage them to step up and DO something to try and help find their own daughter, because they haven't. After the first three days, Deb and Jeremy went into hiding except for exclusive (paid) interviews done with ABC. (And not even that after the lawyer got involved.)

 

In that example, the woman trying to help really DOES know what they're going through with having had her own children go missing, as far as dealing with the media, the insults and accusations coming from the public, etc. She completely empathizes with them.... if in fact they really don't know what happened to Lisa. She would be a perfect person whose support *I* would certainly if my child went missing. I sure wouldn't be yelling at her through the door to go away and call the police on her! :glare: (That was on camera, btw.)

[elegantlion]

Where did you hear a theory about the baby being sold? Is this a theory of the police or some detective, etc.? Or just random people on FB or something? I haven't heard anything about that.

 

 

 

Apparently one of the people at the party or in the neighborhood bragged about selling the baby. Of couse, it could be all talk.

[MrsBasil]

Some of the people at the prayer vigils were vocally hostile to the parents. I'm not convinced of the parents innocence or guilt, but I wouldn't people yelling things at me while gathered on my front lawn. Particularly with 2 small children in the house. The parents asked them to stop the vigils on their front lawn, not stop altogether.

[Donna A.]

Some of the people at the prayer vigils were vocally hostile to the parents. I'm not convinced of the parents innocence or guilt, but I wouldn't people yelling things at me while gathered on my front lawn. Particularly with 2 small children in the house. The parents asked them to stop the vigils on their front lawn, not stop altogether.

 

Yes, I did say they told them to go somewhere else. ;)

 

The reason the people were vocally hostile to the parents is because of the parents' lack of involvement in searching for their own daughter. Even the fact that they refuse to be interviewed separately is odd.

 

I don't really have a problem with them not wanting people on their front lawn all the time, at all hours of the day and night. That said, Deb and Jeremy could do something to stop the accusations of not caring about finding their dd, but they won't.

[AuntieM]

Echoing Donna, the parents' so outside-the-range-of-expected behavior has, all along, caused much of the public to feel very little sympathy for them. The case of the two children missing for years was a memorable event here. Turning away the support of that mom in such a crass way was the last straw for many who were trying to grant the parents the benefit of doubt.

 

This case, on the local scene, is virtually a dead issue. No media coverage whatsoever. I do understand their stance on the prayer vigils in the front yard, there are many more appropriate venues for prayer without potential for problems. The stupid part, to me, is the lack of any action whatsoever on the part of the parents. At this time of year when so many are out and about with holiday activitites, I for one would want my missing child's face plastered all over the place - TV, malls, grocery stores, hotels - any where that child might be spotted. I would find my kid or die trying.

Edited December 19, 2011 by AuntieM

[angela in ohio]

Yes, I did say they told them to go somewhere else. ;)

 

The reason the people were vocally hostile to the parents is because of the parents' lack of involvement in searching for their own daughter. Even the fact that they refuse to be interviewed separately is odd.

 

I don't really have a problem with them not wanting people on their front lawn all the time, at all hours of the day and night. That said, Deb and Jeremy could do something to stop the accusations of not caring about finding their dd, but they won't.

 

I don't think they have a responsibility to do what we or the press want. I just don't. I would be concerned if they were doing things purposefully to make people stop accusing them. I'd prefer they act naturally. (Of course, I think they probably did it, but it scares me that I would act the same way they are and be accused if I was innocent.)

 

In another thread, a woman's child committed a crime, and she was advised to seek an attorney, stop talking, have him lie, etc. It was all about how the "system is out to get you." I just wonder why people don't think the parents are reacting just like that. I sure wouldn't be sitting through hours of police interviews while they grilled me and asked me the same questions over and over or separated me from my dh. I'd tell them what I know and then go home to my other dc who needed me. I wouldn't care what the media or the rest of the world thought; I would act in the way that worked best for my family.

 

And no, I probably wouldn't want to talk to someone whose dc had ended up murdered. That would be the last thing I wanted to think about or hear about while my dc was missing. I get that that mother feels like she needs to do something to make something positive come out of her dc's death, but it's not help if they don't want it.

[RanchGirl]

Serious money issues, yes. They're on welfare, and one reason Deb's still married to her ex-husband (who is NOT Lisa's father) is allegedly because they haven't been able to afford a divorce. (Deb's husband stated that in an interview.)

 

By serious money issues, I was referring to a large, sudden, urgent need, something that would make a family lose their minds in desperation. Such as uncovered cancer treatments or owing money to a loan-shark. And if they had a sudden influx of cash, there would surely be some paper trail or change in spending behavior that would be a huge red flag to police.

 

As for someone coming to the door offering to be my support -- I would throw them out too.

 

Honestly, I am really not on any side in this case, I don't know why I'm trying to find reasons to defend these people. If there is evidence that they hurt or sold their child, they should be prosecuted, jailed, scorned, vilified. But I just haven't read anything that made me conclude it was even likely. It's such an atrocious thing to hurt your own child, I would like to think it is rare.

Edited December 20, 2011 by RanchGirl

[HeidiKC]

Even the fact that they refuse to be interviewed separately is odd. .

 

I don't think this is odd. I read that when the police interviewed Jeremy alone, they told him that Deb had confessed to them. Well, just imagine that you are innocent...and the police pull that one on you. That must have messed Jeremy (and Deb) up for sure. If that happened to me I can't even imagine how upset and angry I'd be (if innocent). I wouldn't find it productive and would be so frustrated that the police were wasting hours on me when I was desperate for them to be spending that time doing what would seem to me (if innocent and broken-hearted) the REAL search.

 

I think it's easy to assume they are guilty and so to chalk their odd behavior up to guilt. But imagine if they are innocent, we have NO idea what we'd do in their shoes. Maybe they're odd, make bad decisions about who to talk to, who to hire, etc., maybe they've got standard money problems. But none of that makes them guilty. I think it's interesting to try to look at some of their reactions imagining we were in their shoes...and innocent. Maybe it seems more likely then. As a pp said, I can see them turning Tina Porter away since her children did not have a happy ending and it isn't at all what they want to think about. I'm sure they're just a mess, and maybe even somewhat unstable. That could also explain some bad decisions they're making, even turning Tina Porter away.

[katilac]

I do not fault the parents for not participating in the searches -if the baby were found that way, it would almost certainly be as a dead body. I can understand not being able to face that.

[AuntieM]

I do not fault the parents for not participating in the searches -if the baby were found that way, it would almost certainly be as a dead body. I can understand not being able to face that.

 

 

Of course you are right. But to limit the publicity on the case, to not keep her face front and center in the public eye as long as possible/necessary? I personally have great trouble understanding that.