Jump to content

Menu

A Parenting WWYD


What is your opinion of what these parents did:  

  1. 1. What is your opinion of what these parents did:

    • Acceptable
      1
    • Bizarre but still acceptable
      35
    • Unacceptable and borderline abusive
      185
    • Other
      35


Recommended Posts

Creepy, weird, and extremely dumb. Based on what you heard, these parents have some mighty poor judgement. I'm wondering, though, if you've got the whole story. A third hand account might mean something important was left out/added.

 

Exactly.

 

As the story was told, it doesn't make sense. We have to assume that there was a point to the wasabi, but we don't know what it was. Sounds like there was something lost in the translation.

 

If there was nothing beyond the original story, then it's a sad little story and the parents are grossly misguided. But my hope is that something was lost in the retelling of the story.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The twisted irony is that he tried to walk away from people who had power/influence and get away from something bad.

 

They wouldn't let him; but they expect him to do so with influential peers.

 

Sick.

 

:iagree:

 

What a way to teach a kid that his parents are more dangerous than his peers.

Edited by Rosie_0801
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I maintain that the "parents" of this boy broke the law by serving the boy alcohol. It is illegal to give a 13 year old child alcohol.

 

Call.the.police.

 

They placed a glass of alcohol in front of him. That is considered "serving a minor," at least in Michigan.

 

Actually, that is not the law in every state. I am familiar with a few states where it is legal to serve your own child alcohol. I would also argue that placing an alcoholic beverage in front of a child and instructing them NOT to drink it would not be considered serving the child alcohol. Otherwise, a parent could never set an alcoholic beverage down in front of a child. :confused:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Jean, do YOU know what the point of the lesson was supposed to be? Please share, because this is freakin weird!

 

I voted "other" for what the...?

 

I don't totally know. All I know is that the person who shared this with me is a relative of the parents involved and was quite upset at what went on. The parents (according to my friend) are not known for making good parenting decisions and this incident was sort of the icing on the cake.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't totally know. All I know is that the person who shared this with me is a relative of the parents involved and was quite upset at what went on. The parents (according to my friend) are not known for making good parenting decisions and this incident was sort of the icing on the cake.

 

My fear would be that this incident is representative of a pattern, paradigm, or dynamic. If it were an anomaly, that would be different. I might be able to frame it as an epic fail but motivated out of love and protection and searching for a dramatic way to underscore a point.

 

If it is a part of a whole of parenting, I'd be very concerned. Concerned to the point of considering appropriate intervention or further investigation.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I just heard the story of parents wanting to teach their 13 yob a lesson. They put two glasses in front of him, one with water, one with vodka and asked him to drink one (the one with water). He drank it. They then asked him to put the other liquid up to his lips, but NOT to drink and to say if he could tell the difference. The boy smelt it and said that he could tell it was different.

 

Then the parents gave him two spoons. One had quacamole and one had wasabi. He ate the guacamole and they told him to eat the other. He wasn't told what was on them. He knew it wouldn't be "good" and he didn't want to, so he said no and started to leave, quickly! The mom went after him, physically took hold of his arms and walked him back to the kitchen. She said that he didn't have a choice, that he had to eat what was on the spoon. The boy put it into his mouth and immediately spit it into the sink, then ran out of the room.

 

The boy had done nothing to be in trouble for. The parents wanted him to know the seriousness of what other teens do with alcohol since he was close to someone who got sick from experimenting.

 

The person who told me the story wanted my opinion on this, and after giving it, I wondered what other parents would say.

 

Very bizarre. No point to it whatsoever. Creepy. Don't know what they thought they were "teaching" him. Why not just talk about what happened to the other kid? Like I said, "Creepy." "Abusive" There was no reasonable point.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't totally know. All I know is that the person who shared this with me is a relative of the parents involved and was quite upset at what went on. The parents (according to my friend) are not known for making good parenting decisions and this incident was sort of the icing on the cake.

 

I would never trust nor even attempt to make an assessment of a situation based on third-hand knowledge.

 

My own parents regularly tell stories that are twisted to make people they don't like look terrible (or just to make themselves look better by comparison), while leaving out key, critical information. As an example - if a child got a 15 minute time out for sneaking large amounts of cake, my parents would relay the story as "child was put in the corner for hours because she was hungry and they didn't want to feed her."

 

Generally, if a story sounds completely bizarre and pointless, logic says that most likely there is something missing. I am not going to jump all over people I don't know for a story that may not be accurate (or even close to accurate).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I would never trust nor even attempt to make an assessment of a situation based on third-hand knowledge.

 

My own parents regularly tell stories that are twisted to make people they don't like look terrible (or just to make themselves look better by comparison), while leaving out key, critical information. As an example - if a child got a 15 minute time out for sneaking large amounts of cake, my parents would relay the story as "child was put in the corner for hours because she was hungry and they didn't want to feed her."

 

Generally, if a story sounds completely bizarre and pointless, logic says that most likely there is something missing. I am not going to jump all over people I don't know for a story that may not be accurate (or even close to accurate).

 

It's ok. I have absolutely no influence in how the relative responds to this situation (though I did give my opinion when asked). And my asking here was curiosity over how other people would have responded to the same story. My assessment was not professional nor was it represented as being professional.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I thought the idea was to present to the teen that just because 2 things look alike, it doesn't make them the same. The water looked like the vodka, but was definitely not the same. The guacamole and the wasabi were.... both green? but one is god and one is.... okay in small amounts with sushi.

 

IDK. I talked to the relative as well and gave my opinion, but it does frighten me for the child involved because I can see this as part of an abusive pattern of behavior.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm going to agree with Joanne: bizarre and abusive, not even borderline.

 

I cannot even imagine what those people were thinking. I mean, I can sort of form words in my head that makes complete sentences, but those sentences hurt my brain and have no meaning. :blink:

 

:ack2:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't really get what the lesson is supposed to be either. I don't really think it's abusive though, I don't think wasabi is *that* hot.

 

Agreed.

 

What if he had liked the wasabi? My son loves it. All that would do is tell him that although the Vodka stinks it probably tastes pretty good.

 

I think the whole scenario sounds stupid and unacceptable, but not abusive.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I wouldn't have done that. If I wanted to make that particular point in that particular manner, I would have told him to just smell it and put it to his lips like he did with the vodka.

 

I don't think torturing the child is going to keep him out of trouble. I think they accomplished breaking down his trust of them.

 

:iagree:And when he reflects on that experience, he's more likely to be depressed or angry -- he might even drink out of retaliation. And what were they doing with vodka in the first place, if they don't want him to go near it? I don't understand the logic of that exercise. :confused:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have no idea what the laws are in the state the person we're talking about lives in.

 

If this happened to MY kids though, I would be on the phone to the cops in a heartbeat. If the other parents did indeed break any laws in this, too bad for them.

 

This is abusive IMO and if it is indeed illegal, then it only HELPS the family to have this investigated.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think it's absolutely horrible and yes I would consider it abusive. You are forcing a young teenager, at an age when he is needing to feel some autonomy and respect, to put something in his mouth which is painful to him despite his protests! You could make an argument for this not being physical abuse I suppose (though I would disagree) but this is certainly emotional abuse and I can't imagine this situation being anything but damaging to his relationship with his parents. I really hope this story lost some details in the retelling. :(

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...