Opinions on baby names chosen in immigrant families?

[pgr]

If a family moves to the US from their native country, what are your thoughts as far as naming their baby (born in the US)?

 

ETA:

 

Adding to my original post, as my "explanatory" post may have gotten buried in all the responses. Thank you so much for *pages* of support for how I feel about this matter.

 

I was born in the US to parents from Northern Europe, and my DH is from the same country (I met him there; we've moved back to the US fairly recently). My own name is reflective of my heritage, as is that of my DH and our kiddos.

 

Having grown up here (and not there), I (we) put in a tremendous amount of thought and consideration into the names we chose, trying to balance heritage with something that wouldn't be a burden to the child, nor very difficult to pronounce/spell, nor translating into something vulgar, etc.

 

I've been really surprised by how rude some people can be, and a recent question posed by my coworker ("did you pick a name for the new baby?") left me both fuming and reeling. As I mentioned in a second post in this thread (somewhere on page 4? ;) ), she vehemently scowled both at the name itself and at the general idea of giving a child a name that pays respect to our heritage.

 

I've had to look at a fair amount of wrinkled noses from the people I am surrounded by regarding all 3 of our choices for names, and many have rolled their eyes and sighed - hence my poll. I phrased the options the way they've been presented to me by others in their comments about how we should be choosing our children's names. I did not explain my situation, because a)I was still quite upset when I first posted and b)I really wanted to know - does anyone here really think this way???

 

Let me reiterate that all are rather easy to pronounce and spell - only not generally known in the US, and clearly traditional to another country.

 

Yes, unless we are Native Americans, we are all immigrants. I read somewhere that the person who forgets his heritage when he steps off the boat not only robs himself, but America as well.

 

That's it. I'll stop now. I've been seething quietly and really wanted to know the opinion of this community - people who are comfortable in general with answers that don't fit the cookie cutter... :)

 

:grouphug:

Edited April 28, 2011 by pgr

[Rebecca VA]

They don't *have* to use Anglo-Saxon names, if that's what you mean. But it would be nice if the name was easy to pronounce and spell.

[LidiyaDawn]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

[Momling]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

:iagree:

[Carrie12345]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

:iagree:

[Sebastian (a lady)]

If a family moves to the US from their native country, what are your thoughts as far as naming their baby (born in the US)?

 

Fine to choose a name traditional to their country of origin or one that is similar in both languages.

 

But if a name is unusual in the US, they need to be easy going when people unfamiliar with the name don't pronounce it or spell it correctly.

[Desert Strawberry]

It's their decision, of course.

 

IME, recent immigrants usually choose *very* traditional American names for their offspring-like Kathy, Sarah, Nancy, John, Michael, etc. I'm sure it 's in part to fit in to the new culture, and in part a liking for the *new* exotic names.

[Tiff in TX]

I think that they should pick whatever name they like.

 

With that being said, if they plan to make the US their new home, they might want to stick with a name that isn't too hard for english speakers to pronounce. I have lots of friends who are first generation Americans and, for the most part, they have names that show their heritage, but they go by a shortened nickname that is easier to pronounce.

[Mimm]

Other? They can name their baby whatever they wish, no matter how ethnic? I like interesting names.

[coffeegal]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

 

Within reason, :iagree: (Just thinking of some of the 'What Were They Thinking?' name threads I've read on the board.) :D

[OnTheBrink]

I think that they should pick whatever name they like.

 

With that being said, if they plan to make the US their new home, they might want to stick with a name that isn't too hard for english speakers to pronounce. I have lots of friends who are first generation Americans and, for the most part, they have names that show their heritage, but they go by a shortened nickname that is easier to pronounce.

 

:iagree: I don't care what people name their children, but I would hope they'd choose something that's relatively easy to pronounce and spell, as well as not sound like an American slang word or something. For example, I saw the name Sukdeep in a baby book once. Not a good choice for a child you plan to raise in the US.

[Mom0012]

I think they should name their baby whatever they want to irregardless of what country they are from and what country the baby is born in. It should have no bearing on their decision whatsoever unless they feel it should.

 

Lisa

[Sherry in OH]

They should choose names they like and are meaningful to them.

 

People born and raised in the U.S. sometimes choose to give their children exotic names or names with invented spellings. Why should the standard for recent immigrants be different?

[Amira]

There can be some good reasons for choosing a name that might not be familiar to most of the people around you, but I can't imagine why anyone "should" choose one name over another in this situation.

 

We've dealt with this. My two oldest sons have typical American names and my youngest has a name that's common in the country we're currently living (all were born in the US). Everyone remembers the youngest's name easily; it's not so easy with the rest of our names. It's also nice when I meet someone with an Arabic name because I'm more familiar with Arabic names rather than Turkic.

 

But none of those reasons are good enough to determine what parents name their children. Maybe they can be a factor, as they were with our youngest son, but I'd never encourage someone to pick an American name just because they lived in the US.

[Harriet Vane]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

 

:iagree:

[FaithManor]

Whatever floats their boat. But, I do think that in honor of general compassion and consideration of the child, the name should require linguistic lessons to learn to pronounce, or three years in kindergarten in order to learn to spell it.

 

New immigrants should gently be brought up to speed quickly on some of the "idosyncracies of the language". Dh works with a team from Chanai, India and one of his collegues, new to American soil had a name so long and difficult to pronounce that it was suggested he choose a shortened version of his name for a nickname. His name was Chittibaboo plus about 13 or 14 more letters on that which I can't remember. So, he introduced himself at a meeting as "Chitti" but ch is said sh in Hindi and so with his accent, well, you can guess what came out! He spent half a day calling himself this until Dh managed to catch up with him and had a little talk. They settled on something more appropriate.

 

Faith

[Desert Strawberry]

I don't see how thier immigrant status has anything to do with their choice of what to name thier children.

 

I live in Cajun country. It's common right now to use Cajun French names. I'm not aware of any rules I must adhere to, just because we live here and I married into a Cajun family. If I want to name my kid Honore or Angelle, that's my business. I haven't, and that's my business, too.

[Dobela]

I know many people whose families have been in the US for many generations that chose unusual and hard to spell/pronounce names for their children. Why should we expect someone from another country to do any different?

[Jenny in Florida]

I can't imagine why I should have any say in what they name their own child.

[Mejane]

I think much depends on their goal as newcomers. Do they want to "blend", or do they want the fact that they are of a certain ethnicity to stand out? That said, I do feel badly for some of the kids that get saddled with some of the names I've heard.

Edited April 27, 2011 by Mejane

[Julie Smith]

Personally it should be a name that I can pronounce. I shall hence forth be the 'gold standard' that all new names and words will be measured against.

 

:)

 

Seriously I do have trouble with saying many things. I have a speech impediment and get tongue tied. But this can even happen on names that most people don't consider ethnic. You can name your kid anything you want. But just don't expect me to be able to pronounce it. Yes even if you tell me the correct way of saying it 50 times. I just have tons of trouble in this area.

 

I do thing some common sense should be used. But I wouldn't know how to 'enforce' it? But those cases are odd and usually because the parents are trying to be funny?

[Impish]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

:iagree:

Most unusual names I've heard are from many generation Canadians, including what names my brothers gave their sons.

[myfunnybunch]

I picked "Other" because, in the least snarky way possible, I truly think it's none of my business.

 

We host exchange students, and many of them choose "American" names while they are here because we can't pronounce their names properly. My ds's Korean friend has both an American name and a Korean name. I don't know which is his legal birth name, but he goes by his American name in the U.S. and his Korean name when he visits Korea.

 

I expect that most immigrant or non-native English speakers consider pronunciation and culture issues when they name their children, and choose names accordingly, but really it's their child(ren) so there isn't really a "should" or "shouldn't", IMO.

 

Cat

[Mrs Mungo]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

 

Fine to choose a name traditional to their country of origin or one that is similar in both languages.

 

But if a name is unusual in the US, they need to be easy going when people unfamiliar with the name don't pronounce it or spell it correctly.

 

:iagree: With both of these.

[redsquirrel]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

 

That is the closest I can come to an opinion on this

[....]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

 

:lol:

 

My kids have very ethnic names. Even though a family's been in the country for a few decades, a lot of them have the tradition that it's a huge honor to pass on a grandparent's name or a parent's name. One of my daughters has Mi-Hwa in her name. No one will know how to spell it or say it, but the grandma almost fainted when she found out she was going to have a namesake (in a family with absolutely no girls, too - Lol).

 

On a sad note, my husband had his name legally changed to an Anglo-Saxon-sounding name when he was in 8th grade. So, his family calls him by his real name and he also has the legal name he goes by at work/for business, etc. If you think about it, it's kinda sad.

 

Well, off to co-op, Peeps. :auto:

[Crissy]

If a family moves to the US from their native country, what are your thoughts as far as naming their baby (born in the US)?

 

Without sounding rude or insensitive, I have to say this is such an odd question. Maybe it has to do with the way you phrased the question and the poll choices.

Or do you really believe people should be held to some baby-naming standard because they were born outside this country?

[Jane in NC]

Question on an option in the poll: What is "an American name"?

[Dawn in OH]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

:iagree:

[vonfirmath]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

:iagree:

[mommaduck]

Agreeing with previous posters:

 

What is an "American" name? What business is it of anyone's what someone names their child? What does immigration have to do with it? I could name my child a very, and truly, AMERICAN name (Unalega...and you'd have fun trying to pronounce that one unless you understood Cherokee), and I my youngest child has a very Gaelic name for one of her names (Maoliose...also not pronounced how it looks).

[Caitilin]

I can't imagine why I should have any say in what they name their own child.

 

:iagree: exactly.

[Ester Maria]

This is why I like "standard", international names, or at least not too exotic ones - they are easily adaptable and one can even officially name their child one thing and call them another thing. That is a tactic many Jews I know use, with kids being Benjamin and Eve in official documents, but Binyamin and Chava at home / in the community setting / etc. Not that there is something inherently wrong with just naming a kid Chava, but it will be hard to get Anglos pronounce the CH which comes from the throat and, quite often, they may mispronounce it like regularch ch, so the poor child may end up called chay - va, or something like that.

 

So, I know such "name couples" of Juliana / Eliana, Vito / Chaim, Gloria / Hila, Laura and David with altering pronunciations, Andrea / Andrew (since the Italian version sounds "feminine" to Anglo ears), Genevieve / Ginevra, etc. Not in all cases it is applicable, but quite often it is a way to satisfy all parties - not to "mark" the child with a foreign-sounding name if one decided to permanently settle in a new place, but at the same time, to be able to call them by a name that fits your language too. My kids have several versions of their names too, they regularly "anglicize" their second names for their friends in the US, and "de-italianize" their Hebrew names when needed too.

[....]

Question on an option in the poll: What is "an American name"?

 

Yeah, exactly!

[Brindee]

Without sounding rude or insensitive, I have to say this is such an odd question. Maybe it has to do with the way you phrased the question and the poll choices.

Or do you really believe people should be held to some baby-naming standard because they were born outside this country?

 

Question on an option in the poll: What is "an American name"?

:iagree:

 

Where did this question come from? I'm not getting why it would even matter to me if, for example, Crissy, from a foreign country, chose to name her child Ndfioefzlvc! Would that not be Crissy's choice? (sorry to use you as an example Crissy, it was just convenient since I quoted your post :001_smile:)

 

And I agree also, what is an American name? If you look up origins, most "American names" are NOT American! What would we do to people who chose to name their child Ndfioefzlvc? Why would there ever even need to be any "rule" about this?

 

I'm not trying to be snarky either, I just have no idea why this question would be posed???

[kchara]

I agree with all of the PPs who said it's none of my business. I personally enjoy ethnic and unusual names. I do try to have my kids' names be some what pronounceable by Americans, though. For example, I wanted to name one of my twins Ceili, which is the Gaelic word for gathering or party, but I knew that no one would EVER get it. (It's pronounced kay-lee.) Instead, we opted for Caeleigh, which still looks pretty cool written out, IMHO, and she wouldn't have to explain. As much.

 

My family has lived in the US for over 100 years on both sides. DH's family came over in his grandmother's generation. Since we both have a common heritage, though, we decided to name our kids based off of that heritage.

[NanceXToo]

Choice E: I couldn't care less what they name their baby. It's their baby. There is no "they should" or "they should if."

[pgr]

Help! I don't know how to add an option on the poll. :confused:

 

I haven't been able to read all the replies yet - I didn't think there would be this many so quickly!

 

I'll be back later this PM as I have to get to an appt right now.

 

I want to say THANK YOU, though - I tried to make the question/poll as non biased as I could as not to "sway" the results.

 

We are that family, and I am getting a bit irritated with the number of people commenting on our kids' names. Especially since I was born in the US and have an ethnic name myself - we (as did my parents) made a very conscious effort not to choose names that are cumbersome, really out of this world (in a bad way) sound funny, are impossible to pronounce/spell, or sound like curse words in English....

 

Yesterday my coworker asked what we planned to name the baby on the way. I told her. She asked to write it down. Then she wrinkled her nose and said "well, I guess he'll just have to get used to it and live with it" and threw the piece of paper in the trash. :glare:

 

I've gotten similar comments on my own name, as well as the names of my kiddos. I was starting to wonder if it's me, or if I'm just dealing with people who are comfortable only in their familiar little world....

 

 

ACK! Gotta run - but thank you all for the replies.

I

[stripe]

American names? Like, of Algonquin, Cherokee, Hopi and Nez Perce origin?

 

Everyone keeps promoting "When in Rome," but I must have missed the part of history when British people who moved to India, East Africa, and so on all named their children Lakshmi and so forth.

 

Why not make Asian immigrants get eye surgery and Mexican immigrants bleach their skin to look "American"?

 

When did "being American" start to mean that someone doesn't get to contribute to what being American means? When did it become a process of only receiving culture, and not participating in it??

 

I see a great deal more openness to names from other languages than when I was a kid, when immigrants' kids were all named Bob and Jane.

 

Though I do have a Chinese neighbor who purposely named his child something very common in English so he would "be an American."

[nmoira]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

:iagree:

 

What is an "American" name anyway? Do you mean Native American?

[Ester Maria]

American names? Like, of Algonquin, Cherokee, Hopi and Nez Perce origin?

 

Everyone keeps promoting "When in Rome," but I must have missed the part of history when British people who moved to India, East Africa, and so on all named their children Lakshmi and so forth.

 

Why not make Asian immigrants get eye surgery and Mexican immigrants bleach their skin to look "American"?

 

When did "being American" start to mean that someone doesn't get to contribute to what being American means? When did it become a process of only receiving culture, and not participating in it??

You're taking it way too far.

 

It is a "measure" to adjust linguistically first and foremost, and in every place, if not an official language, there is a de facto language, the language of documents, the language of education. An attempt to make your life easier rather than sweat the unusual spelling you have to explain each time does not mean "betraying" your culture, HAVING to call your child by the Anglo variant at home, blending in absolutely in all circumstances under all costs... Just an adjustment from a linguistic point of view, and many times a compromise of the kind is perfectly possible, especially when it comes to more common, international names, or names which can be "translated" to what sounds like a name in the new culture.

 

Not that people have to do it, but I see nothing wrong with "when in Rome" when it comes to this and permanent settling in a place. Quite often it is just a matter of spelling and minimal compromise, yet you make your life and the kid's life easier.

[kchara]

Help! I don't know how to add an option on the poll. :confused:

 

I haven't been able to read all the replies yet - I didn't think there would be this many so quickly!

 

I'll be back later this PM as I have to get to an appt right now.

 

I want to say THANK YOU, though - I tried to make the question/poll as non biased as I could as not to "sway" the results.

 

We are that family, and I am getting a bit irritated with the number of people commenting on our kids' names. Especially since I was born in the US and have an ethnic name myself - we (as did my parents) made a very conscious effort not to choose names that are cumbersome, really out of this world (in a bad way) sound funny, are impossible to pronounce/spell, or sound like curse words in English....

 

Yesterday my coworker asked what we planned to name the baby on the way. I told her. She asked to write it down. Then she wrinkled her nose and said "well, I guess he'll just have to get used to it and live with it" and threw the piece of paper in the trash. :glare:

 

I've gotten similar comments on my own name, as well as the names of my kiddos. I was starting to wonder if it's me, or if I'm just dealing with people who are comfortable only in their familiar little world....

 

 

ACK! Gotta run - but thank you all for the replies.

I

 

 

Sounds like you're just dealing with especially rude and narrow minded people. I'm sorry you've had to experience that. :grouphug:

[dirty ethel rackham]

I don't think anyone should be limited to "American sounding names" regardless of their country of origin or ethnic background. What a boring world it would be if everyone was "Bob", "Mary", "Jeremy", or "Emily." If they choose a name that is difficult to pronounce or spell, then they and their child will deal with the consequences for the rest of the child's life. But, that's their business.

 

I don't like "trendy" names, but I do like unusual names. My Orthodox friends have chosen some beautiful, meaningful names for their children based upon saints I am unfamiliar with. I am inspired by the thought and effort they put onto the names. I was in a different place on my faith journey when we were having our 2 older children, so my boys names were chosen because we liked them, didn't know anyone we didn't like with those names and they appealed to dh's "gotta be a man's name - one syllable - easy to remember and shake hands with" kind of name:) I put my foot down with dd and chose her name because it was meaningful to us and for the religious significance.

[OLG]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

 

:iagree:

[Brindee]

Sounds like you're just dealing with especially rude and narrow minded people. I'm sorry you've had to experience that. :grouphug:

:iagree: :grouphug:

 

Now that I understand where you (OP) are coming from by asking this, it makes more sense. Wish you would've put that background on your first post!

 

From what I've experienced, most Americans are fine with ethnic names, or any name someone chooses for their child.

 

I have a friend who named one of their sons Milwaukee. People were surprised at first, but got used to it. And actually, another friend of mine named their son Jacob....and got comments from a couple of people who didn't like that name for one reason or another! :confused:

 

I voted other, but I do agree that they need to be careful of how it comes across in English, as a PP said. That's the only "restriction" I could think of, and think it's VERY rude for people to treat you the way they have! Move out here, people are certainly more open to that it sounds like! :001_smile:

[nukeswife]

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

 

:iagree:

[*Inna*]

I can't imagine why I should have any say in what they name their own child.

:iagree:

For my children we chose the names that would be easily pronounced and spelled in all 3 languages we speak and both sets of grandparents will not have a problem with them.

 

I don't think we should consider anyone else's opinion on the matter, though.

[jujsky]

It's no one's business what people name their children. There are plenty of Americans who choose weird names that are both difficult to spell and pronounce. Why should immigrants have to conform in that way when Americans do not?

[Tammyla]

:iagree: Name your child what you want. Have your baby and be happy.

 

My "thoughts" are that it isn't anyone else's business what names a family chooses for their children.

[HeathenMom]

i really don't have an opinion on this poll, but it made me remember this:

 

my brother used to play soccer with an Indian boy whose parents had immigrated here. His name was Presley and his little brother was named Elvis. they were all about America, and a really awesome family. :)