lilbean05 Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 We started formally homeschooling my daughter when she was 4 and begging to do math and writing. My husband and I both come from accelerated/gifted backgrounds and have always been of the mindset that it would be prudent to continue homeschooling, but to also keep our minds open to GT schools or other accelerated opportunities, should they exist where we live. We recently applied for my daughter to attend a GT school in the area and are now faced with the dilemma of deciding if she should attend or not. We both have programmed into us a need to accept an offer to attend a selective school, both because of its selectivity and what it can provide to the child. However, we have really grown to love homeschooling and are really torn about what to do. We don't want to stick our head in the mud and think we can do better than a public school ever can, nor do we want to be blinded by the stigmatization of "if you are asked to attend a selective school, you accept!". So, in short, what sorts of experiences have you had with this? Any insight, thoughts, experiences that you want to share that you feel might bring a different perspective? TIA! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeanM Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 I think it really depends on the school, your dd, and other factors. I have a relative who is attending a public school for the gifted, and in addition he is placed ahead one grade. The school required a lot of writing before he was really ready for that, and he gets teased a lot for being short. He is not really being challenged academically, but school is challenging for him for other reasons. I don't know if this helps, I just thought I'd share his experience in a school for the gifted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jennynd Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 I probably will send her. I wish we have that kind choice. I think it will be good for the kiddo to learn with kids with similar capability. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bostonian Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 Since you are not sure what option is best, I suggest sending her to the school. Either (a) it will be great (b) it won't be as good as what you can provide at home, in which case you can resume homeschooling. Why not give the school a try? FWIW I am an afterschooler, not a homeschooler. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crimson Wife Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 I would give it a try for a semester, and see how it goes. If it works, great! If not, I'd pull out after finishing the semester. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AngelaNYC Posted April 17, 2011 Share Posted April 17, 2011 (edited) Our GT program was wonderful. It just wasn't a good fit for dd. She was 6 when she took the test. 25 elementary schools sent a total of about 600 first graders to test for 25 spots and dd made it in. Of course we all thought this was such a privilege and an honor as this was one of the best programs around. It's even called "The Academy for the Intellectually Gifted" :tongue_smilie: They offered so many enrichment programs: Art Studio, Science Lab, Piano Keyboard, Spanish, etc., for 2nd grade. Dd made a ton of friends but was bored with the academics. Over 2 years she'd lost her love of learning, her curiosity, her enthusiam, and all of a sudden had this I-don't-care attitude. The teachers thought she had ADHD and told me to get her tested and put her on medication "because it's so good for them and it worked so well for my own daughter..." :glare: . That's when we decided to homeschool. I really do think GTs can be fantastic for the child who can go with that kind of flow. My dd was more of an out of the box thinker, creative type who marched to her own drum. Homeschooling was what she needed. I'm glad I gave the program a chance, though. I think you should let her try it. You'll always wonder about it if you don't. Most kids do thrive in that kind of environment. You know you can always return to homeschooling if it ends up not being a good fit. No matter what, it's very exciting to be chosen. Congrats. p.s. She is now 14 and started going to school again - at another gifted school (with a 6% acceptance rate). This one is for both academics and performing arts. She LOVES it and is doing very well there. Edited April 17, 2011 by Abkjw01 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilbean05 Posted April 18, 2011 Author Share Posted April 18, 2011 Abkjw01--my daughter sounds a lot like yours, which is why I am apprehensive to send her. She will certainly give some of those teachers a run for their money, because she is ready to give a pretty solid argument for all of her "out of the box" thinking should she be told she is "wrong"! It is great that so many of you agree that it wouldn't be detrimental to give it a shot and just pull her out if it isn't working out well. I would hate for her to lose her spunk, which I think is one of my biggest issues with sending her, but I am sure if that sort of thing happened, a few months back into homeschooling could get her feeling normal again. Thank you for your words of experience and advice! I will throw them into the mix when DH and I sit back down and try to figure out what to do. (Bostonian--as a funny aside, I asked my daughter today if she would be okay going to the school even if it meant that she didn't get to do all of the outdoor science exploration and activities we do. Her response: "Oh, that's okay! We can just do it like we always do, just after I get home in the afternoon." Nice.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeatherInWI Posted April 21, 2011 Share Posted April 21, 2011 I'm not sure. I homeschool and live in a small town with no gifted program. My sister, whose children are near the same age and probably equally gifted, live in a city and are in special all-gifted classes. In comparison: Sister's children have more friends. Mine are content with a few. Sister's children have more peer pressure and conform to their peers more. Mine laugh at attempts at peer pressure. Sister's children have more arts/music opportunities. My children wish they could be in a band, choir, or play. Sister's children have more academic competition opportunities. Mine don't care much about competition. Sister's children get awards for sister to brag about. My children rarely do. Sister's children prefer their peers to their siblings. My children are best friends and hang out with the same outside friends. Sister's children are a year or two ahead of those in regular classes. My children are even farther ahead academically, I think in all subjects. Sister's children are in school all day, then have homework to do in the evening. My children have more time to pursue their own interests and special opportunities -- and they do. Sister's children have to put up with occasional poor teachers and bad curricula. My children can help choose curricula and change in mid-stream when needed. Sister can work full time and increase her family's wealth. I stay home full time and increase our family's relationships. That's the breakdown, and what's right for a particular family and child depends on their individual needs. If your daughter really wants to participate in competitive extracurricular activities, or feels the need to constantly be with peers, she'd probably prefer the gifted school. If she likes time and opportunity to pursue her own passions, home is probably better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crimson Wife Posted April 21, 2011 Share Posted April 21, 2011 Sister can work full time and increase her family's wealth. I stay home full time and increase our family's relationships. To be charitable, if your sister lives in a major city, her cost of living is almost certainly quite a bit higher than yours. She may very well be working to help make ends meet rather than because she's materialistic. Don't judge another until you've walked a mile in her shoes... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BabyBre Posted April 21, 2011 Share Posted April 21, 2011 Since you are not sure what option is best, I suggest sending her to the school. Either (a) it will be great (b) it won't be as good as what you can provide at home, in which case you can resume homeschooling. Why not give the school a try? FWIW I am an afterschooler, not a homeschooler. One thing to consider is that if you do decide it's not the right fit for her after she's become comfortable and happy there, she may be quite resistant to coming back home. Just decide if you're willing to make the executive decision if you need to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BabyBre Posted April 21, 2011 Share Posted April 21, 2011 I'm not sure. I homeschool and live in a small town with no gifted program. My sister, whose children are near the same age and probably equally gifted, live in a city and are in special all-gifted classes. In comparison: Sister's children have more friends. Mine are content with a few. Sister's children have more peer pressure and conform to their peers more. Mine laugh at attempts at peer pressure. Sister's children have more arts/music opportunities. My children wish they could be in a band, choir, or play. Sister's children have more academic competition opportunities. Mine don't care much about competition. Sister's children get awards for sister to brag about. My children rarely do. Sister's children prefer their peers to their siblings. My children are best friends and hang out with the same outside friends. Sister's children are a year or two ahead of those in regular classes. My children are even farther ahead academically, I think in all subjects. Sister's children are in school all day, then have homework to do in the evening. My children have more time to pursue their own interests and special opportunities -- and they do. Sister's children have to put up with occasional poor teachers and bad curricula. My children can help choose curricula and change in mid-stream when needed. Sister can work full time and increase her family's wealth. I stay home full time and increase our family's relationships. That's the breakdown, and what's right for a particular family and child depends on their individual needs. If your daughter really wants to participate in competitive extracurricular activities, or feels the need to constantly be with peers, she'd probably prefer the gifted school. If she likes time and opportunity to pursue her own passions, home is probably better. :001_smile: LOVE that! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cera Posted April 22, 2011 Share Posted April 22, 2011 (edited) Have you made a list of the pros and cons (I seem to do this for everything). What can the school offer that you can't? Are there art and music classes that you can't replicate? Special labs? Clubs or competitions your child could participate in? A network of friends that are truly her peers (similar intellect and age which can be hard to find) What would you be giving up to send her? Autonomy and flexibility definitely. Time together. What would you gain at home? More time to focus on the other kids. Money (if you don't have to pay for outside classes because she is getting those things in school) Would the school allow her to attend for a day and shadow a student so she could get a feel for it? I don't really see any drawbacks to trying it out for a semester as long as she isn't completely against it (in which case I doubt it would be a success). If it doesn't work out you can always withdraw her. eta: How does the admissions process for the GT schools work in your area? In ours kids can apply in 1st grade and then they automatically stay in the program each year. If kids want to apply in later years (after 1st) it is much harder for them to get in because they have limited spots (and kids already in the GT elementary schools have preference for the GT middle and high schools). Edited April 22, 2011 by Cera Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ORP Posted April 22, 2011 Share Posted April 22, 2011 Schools offer a lot. They say whatever they can to get you in. The issue is getting them to fulfill the promises that they make. If your child works faster than the other kids what will she be doing? Wasting years on busywork, volunteering, peer tutoring, ect? Depending on the the specific school, you may be in for de-acceleration. If your school won't hold up to what they sold themselves as, do not fall for more promises that the next year will be better. Actions are louder than words, your child is too important to put money in their pockets with good test scores and attendance. They want you there, so they need to provide. There are some phenomenal schools, and then there are the others... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeatherInWI Posted April 22, 2011 Share Posted April 22, 2011 To be charitable, if your sister lives in a major city, her cost of living is almost certainly quite a bit higher than yours. She may very well be working to help make ends meet rather than because she's materialistic. Don't judge another until you've walked a mile in her shoes... I'm not judging her -- we each make our own decisions. (And, btw, the cost of living in my area is significantly *higher* than in hers.) And since she is the main income earner in her family right now, due to our messed-up economy, I think it's a good thing that they decided, long ago, that she'd keep her career. I'm also very glad that she lives in an area where there are good educational opportunities for her children! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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