Jump to content

Menu

Science Story: Bee 2 by 9 year old boy (nothing to do with bees)


nitascool
 Share

Recommended Posts

Science Story: Bee 2 by 9 year old boy

My 9 year old son wrote this story after being asked to write a Gymnosperm Mini-book about Trees. He was to use the knowledge he had learned in Lesson 10 of Exploring Creation with Botany. This is entirely his work. The Mini-book didn't lend to paragraphing.

 

One quiet night there was a little seed. It was light like any seed. But this seed wasn't any ordinary seed. It was a Red Wood seed. And it was very small, like I said. It wasn't an ordinary Red Wood. This was the time of the flood. Sence the seed was so small it was obvious that this was the tree named after someone in the Bible but first it has to go through many stages for it to grow into a full tree. First it gets its roots. Then the roots reach the top. The tree begins to grow as a small seedling. After a while it gets taller, It turns a bright red and starts to look like wood. It starts getting leaves, like three feet long. Like I said in my last book leaves can grow maybe an inch taller then that. Then finally it is a fully grown tree. Now you can see that it has branches 100 feet Leaves fall in autumn. In winter nothing changes, in spring it finally grows it's leaves back and it is the finest tree you've ever seen.

Edited by nitascool
Link to comment
Share on other sites

This is an example of what he can do now. The exercise took him 45 minutes to complete. I don't really know if he's where he "should be" at his age. He does have writing (penmanship) issues that slow him down significantly so we don't do rewriting with him at this point. I couldn't say if this is typical of an average 9yo.

 

He's had some grammar instruction using First Language Lessons 1&2. We did some creative writing lessons last year using Write Source. We just started using MCT's Grammar Island two weeks ago. I hope to see some improvement in his writing skills as the rest of the year progresses.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It is a very nice mini book. He did a good job going step by step through the stages of the tree's life. I was a tiny bit confused by a couple of things. I didn't understand why this tree was named after someone in the Bible (despite him saying that it was obvious!) And the roots reach the top of what?

 

He had a couple of spelling mistakes that I would work on during a re-write but I understand why you don't do rewrites right now. There were also a couple of punctuation mistakes. In an older child (or for a a re-write) I would list them all but I don't think you need me to do that right now.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This is an example of what he can do now. The exercise took him 45 minutes to complete. I don't really know if he's where he "should be" at his age. He does have writing (penmanship) issues that slow him down significantly so we don't do rewriting with him at this point. I couldn't say if this is typical of an average 9yo.

 

Now this is fairly typical, or even advanced, for a 9yo I think. He should leave out the "like I said" statements. He is also thinking a minibook must be a story, but science writing should be informative. There are a couple of sentences that make me scratch my head and wonder what he means..like why was it obvious the seed is named after someone in the bible :confused: But then I saw where he has penmanship issues. Okay, that makes sense. He loses his place while trying to form the letters and forgets what he was talking about. Have him dictate to you, type it up, then allow him to copy it on paper. Takes the pressure of penmanship off the composition. Too many things at once to remember otherwise. That's probably where all the "like I said" statements are coming from. He isn't reminding the reader, he's reminding himself.

 

I like how he steps us through the stages of the tree and has a solid beginning and ending. If this is his own spelling and grammar, he's making good progress in those areas.

 

Barb

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The author talked about a bristle pine tree that was a little more then a thousand years old called Methuselah. That was what he was referring to. However he was confusing a bristle pine (Methuselah) with a redwood. I asked him about the "obvious" statements and he said that it made the story more interesting. He insisted that they were necessary. :glare: And I asked him about "reaching the top" and he really didn't seem to know how to fix that sentence. We talked about how to make things more clear in his writing. I'm not yet seeing it in the writing. The spelling, grammar and punctuation was all his work, though he did ask how to spell a couple words.

Edited by nitascool
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Your son deserves congratulations for working so hard on this assignment -- 45 minutes for someone who struggles with writing! He steps through the growth of the seed in a logical progression. I especially like the concluding image -- "it is the finest tree you've ever seen."

 

To help him recognize that some parts are confusing, you can put the minibook away for a while until it's no longer fresh in his memory. Right now he knows all the "backstory" to his mini-book so it's hard for him to see that details are missing. After he no longer remembers the context of the writing, take it back out and have him reread it and see if he can accept that some parts don't make sense.

 

Since handwriting makes rewriting difficult, how about editing on the computer? He (or you) can type the passage, and you can do edits together on the computer.

 

Finally, I'm really curious, since it is a minibook, does he have illustrations to go with the text?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...