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A few thoughts on home schooling, public schools, private schools...


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Thank you, for this in particular:

 

Yes. I work "for the government", and every time I hear someone say "the government" is working to poison us through our meat supply or whatever, I just laugh inside. If people only knew now plural humans are, how divided, how unmotivated for huge united movements until under dire threat they are! (And what saboteurs we are, how "well, we HAVE to do it this way? We will see about that" we are.)

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There have been a number of threads on the boards this week discussing public and private schooling options as well as home schooling. I'm a little disturbed by a few of things that happened in those threads...

 

1) Some home schooling parents objected to discussions of public schools on a home schooling board.

 

2) Some home schooling parents issued very strong blanket condemnations of all public schools.

 

3) Other parents responded to those blanket condemnations in a hostile and provoking manner.

 

....And several of the threads spiralled downward from there.

 

I want to weigh in with a few thoughts.

 

First of all, this is primarily a home education board, but it has a very strong secondary purpose--which is to support ALL parents as they educate their children. We do have an afterschooling board, but parents who are not "full time home schoolers" should be able to post questions and observations on any board without getting jumped on.

 

Second, I would like to express my personal point of view on public vs. private vs. home schooling. There is nothing to be gained by taking a strong ideological stance that one form of education is ALWAYS better in every situation than another. I hate to hear blanket condemnations of public education from home educators, just as much as I despise hearing blanket condemnations of home schoolers from public school parents and teachers. There is nothing helpful about this kind of conversation.

 

Some public schools are good. Some aren't. Some private schools are good. Some aren't. Some home educators are doing a good job. Some aren't. Could anything be more obvious?

 

And as far as the public school system being some sort of coordinated effort to indoctrinate children in a certain way of thinking: I don't buy it. Never have. I find the scare language and the alarmist tactics of groups that preach this to be very disturbing.

 

I could get sidetracked on this, but at the moment I won't; instead, let me just offer my final point:

 

Third, although I don't like blanket condemnations of public schools, we're not going to ban that sort of conversation on these boards. I have been to too many home education conferences where I was told, when picking up my speaker badge, that if I said anything in support of public education or charter schools, I would break the terms of my contract and forfeit my honorarium and have to pay for my own flight and hotel room. (I have never visited those conferences a second time, by the way.) There's no way on earth I'm going to exercise that sort of censorship on this message board.

 

It would be more useful for those of you who object to blanket condemnations of public schools to engage with the threads thoughtfully and carefully. So far, many of you have engaged with it with derision and hostility. NOT HELPFUL. (Also, please stop hitting the report button when someone says something you don't like.)

 

Hope people on both sides of this issue will read this and think about it.

 

SWB

 

I heart you for this. Thank you.

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Not entirely. I have felt that some of the ps posts/polls have an agenda behind them, like public schools are superior to homeschooling. Now maybe I am just being overly sensitive in this regard, but Feb. is a hard month for some hsers and I am very protective of new or burnt out hsers.

 

:iagree::iagree: 100%!!

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Susan,

 

I'm so grateful for your WTM book, this forum, and all your wonderful insight, as well as everyone elses thoughtful suggestions. We homeschooled DS for 3 years, and now he is in PS and thriving. Will he stay there? Who knows - whatever is best for him. But because of this site, our 3 years experience homeschooling, and knowing we can come here and jump back into being a hs family, we feel confident in that we can do whatever is best for all our kids.

 

Even though both kids are currently in PS, I lurk here knowing we will probably be back (happily) in one form or another over our HS/PS lives.

 

Thanks!

 

Kelly

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Thank you Susan Wise Bauer for your words. You are an inspiration as always.

 

I am not anti- private or public school, however I find it very discouraging when I come on here for support and encouragement and I find post after post about putting kids back in school or putting kids in school for the first time because it is so much better for them.

 

It is discouraging to think all of my time and efforts over the past 17 years could have been adequately taken over by the school system and I have just wasted nearly half of my life on this educational experiment and my kids would have been better off socially, academically and spiritually if I had just allowed them to go to Public School because of course they are more rigorous than my relaxed homeschool approach (which is not all that relaxed).

I'm sorry you feel that way Faithe :grouphug:

I think the important thing to remember is that when people put their kids back in school because it's better for them, well it's better for THEM, those kids, those parents, that situation. That doesn't make it better for you or your kids or your situation. I firmly believe that every active poster on this board does what they must do to do the best for their kids, even when the going gets tough. What is best is as individual as we are.

 

As a person who has put a child back in school I want to share it, because doing so was as hard, perhaps harder, than removing them from school in the first place. I've held my breath hoping that this last, desperate option for him will work, and the fact that it has worked has eased the burden on my heart for that child.

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I think the important thing to remember is that when people put their kids back in school because it's better for them, well it's better for THEM, those kids, those parents, that situation. That doesn't make it better for you or your kids or your situation. I firmly believe that every active poster on this board does what they must do to do the best for their kids, even when the going gets tough. What is best is as individual as we are.

 

As a person who has put a child back in school I want to share it, because doing so was as hard, perhaps harder, than removing them from school in the first place. I've held my breath hoping that this last, desperate option for him will work, and the fact that it has worked has eased the burden on my heart for that child.

 

:iagree:

When you absolutely love homeschooling and are sold on it, it doesnt mean you no longer believe in it just because you put a child back in school.

I dont think I failed my son just because I put him into highschool this year- I just felt it was what he needed. It doesnt mean I am not passionate about homeschooling, or that I think school is better for all kids- no way.

 

 

Susan, I love it whenever you write on the boards here. You have such a clarity and ability to cut to the core, and such common sense- I very much appreciate it. Thanks for much for being you and for providing these boards.

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....

Some public schools are good. Some aren't. Some private schools are good. Some aren't. Some home educators are doing a good job. Some aren't. Could anything be more obvious?

 

 

SWB

 

Thanks Susan. I have often felt like I do not belong anywhere. Most homeschoolers I know talk so much about the evils of public school and how horrible it is. Well, I taught school for 5 years before I had children. Was I trying to indoctrinate children? NOOOOO!!! Are the lovely women at my church evil because they give their hearts and energy to other children for very little pay? I am just not as conservative as most homeschoolers seem to be.

 

But I don't fit in with the ps people either who feel we shelter too much. Who are glad I can homeschool and there are very few people who could do it as well as I do. :confused: I am not a saint or superwoman!! I do have some concerns about what is going on in ps and they seem blind to them or think they just have to put up with it.

 

So basically, I just keep my mouth shut everywhere. Except here.

 

Thanks for providing a safe place where everyone can fit in.

 

Christine

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Thanks for that post, Susan.:001_smile:

 

...thinking through my posts a bit longer before I hit "Submit Reply"...

 

Same here. Thank you SWB for this life-giving, encouraging place that has made all the difference in the world to my family!

 

Blessings,

Lucinda

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Thanks Susan. I have often felt like I do not belong anywhere. Most homeschoolers I know talk so much about the evils of public school and how horrible it is. Well, I taught school for 5 years before I had children. Was I trying to indoctrinate children? NOOOOO!!! Are the lovely women at my church evil because they give their hearts and energy to other children for very little pay? I am just not as conservative as most homeschoolers seem to be.

 

But I don't fit in with the ps people either who feel we shelter too much. Who are glad I can homeschool and there are very few people who could do it as well as I do. :confused: I am not a saint or superwoman!! I do have some concerns about what is going on in ps and they seem blind to them or think they just have to put up with it.

 

So basically, I just keep my mouth shut everywhere. Except here.

 

Thanks for providing a safe place where everyone can fit in.

 

Christine

 

Well said, Christine! I can relate so much to a lot of what you are saying, especially the part about comments from dear friends who are ps parents to me, the hs mom. I don't feel like a saint or a superwoman either, and I'd like to be able to step down from this pedestal they like to put me on all too often. I believe that we are all doing the best we can for our dc, and each family has different needs, beliefs, goals and desires when it comes to raising our children.

 

Just for the record, any sentiments I've shared regarding ps are actually a reflection of my concerns over what is happening within our culture, which is not the fault of any school system. While I have firm convictions about certain things, I also believe that there are a lot of really good people that work in ps systems and/or send their dc to ps. I respect and love them just as much as I do anyone else.

 

Because this is a site provided by champions of the hs movement, I think it can be confusing at times to some people that come here to learn about hs'ing, or to receive much needed support and encouragement from others when they read some of the discussions. This, combined with the issue of the time of year it is, have created a perfect storm. The answer? Weigh our words carefully. Be respectful and kind to people even when they have different beliefs, values and opinions. Understand and remember that neither homeschooling, private schooling or public schooling can meet the needs of all people all of the time.

 

Blessings,

Lucinda

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Although we homeschool, we very possibly will do public/private school some day, and the threads you referred to have made me cringe. We do what is best for our children and our family at this time. I assume others do likewise.

 

And to those discouraged because the ps discussions make them second-guess themselves...that is the feeling some ps parents and teachers have when they are faced with a die-hard our-way-is-best homeschooler. "Am I really doing the best for my children/students?" Let's all make the assumption that everyone is trying to do their best.

Edited by linders
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Susan, I love it whenever you write on the boards here. You have such a clarity and ability to cut to the core, and such common sense- I very much appreciate it. Thanks for much for being you and for providing these boards.

 

:iagree: Thanks, Susan.

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I'm for school choice. You choose what's best for your child, your family, the current situation you find yourself in. I rejoice with my friends and family who find a school that their child is thriving in, be it homeschooling, public or private school. If my input is asked, I certainly give it and state my bais upfront. After 6 years of homeschooling, my dd is in a christian high school. She is thriving and it was the right choice for her and our family.

 

Thank you Susan for your post and your wisdom. It is because of your book and these boards that I had the courage to step out of my comfort zone and homeschool for those 6 years.

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I've been on a frantic cleaning spree all week and I have to say that I'm glad I missed most of the dramatic threads. I love this board for the inspiration and ideas I get, the wealth of information around here on any given topic is amazing to me. But if it's not fun to be around, I go do something else (even if that's cleaning). :p

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Some public schools are good. Some aren't. Some private schools are good. Some aren't. Some home educators are doing a good job. Some aren't. Could anything be more obvious?

 

 

Absolutely! As a mom who has homeschooled, put her children in a private school and now has her children in public school...while each experience has been different, none has hurt or harmed the kids.

 

I chose a classical private school after homeschooling, while the kids got Spanish and Latin, they were pushed academically to do way more than even I was pushing (quantity) but I felt it was good, esp. for my oldest who got to start in 3rd and finish the year in 4th to being 5th in public school the next year.

 

Ultimately I had to choose public school due to costs and the kids were not a part of the 'inner' group of the private school. Time and time again I saw them being excluded from invitations because they didn't grow up with the kids that had been in this private school from its inception (part of church group that developed a private school).

 

I made sure to put the kids in the best public school district in our area, one that I graduated from. The kids both my dd10 and ds6 are doing well and I have solid, open communication with their teachers even moreso than the private school.

 

Do I get upset at what other kids expose my kids too? Sure! But we learn about how to deal with new information, attitudes, etc. instead of just saying that's right/wrong. Life is full of different people, attitudes and values- I cannot shield my children from that for too long b/c then they are at a disadvantage in how to deal with those situations in a healthy way.

 

I used to judge private/public school parents b/c I wanted to feel that I made the superior choice in homeschooling but then I've also come across homeschool parents who don't invest in their child's education, where the children would be better off with a different schooling choice b/c of the lack of involvement of the parents.

 

I know now that in my current life situation, public school is the best choice for our family. I would LOVE to homeschool again, I miss it but it is more the time spent exploring and learning with my children that I miss rather than the educational philosophy and knowing what next step to take to further my child's educational development. I CAN be the parent who explores and learns with her children more so than I can know for sure what the best next step is in their educational development. I'm okay with that.

 

Just my 2 cents thrown in...

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Thanks Susan. I have often felt like I do not belong anywhere. Most homeschoolers I know talk so much about the evils of public school and how horrible it is. Well, I taught school for 5 years before I had children. Was I trying to indoctrinate children? NOOOOO!!! Are the lovely women at my church evil because they give their hearts and energy to other children for very little pay? I am just not as conservative as most homeschoolers seem to be.

 

But I don't fit in with the ps people either who feel we shelter too much. Who are glad I can homeschool and there are very few people who could do it as well as I do. :confused: I am not a saint or superwoman!! I do have some concerns about what is going on in ps and they seem blind to them or think they just have to put up with it.

 

So basically, I just keep my mouth shut everywhere. Except here.

 

Thanks for providing a safe place where everyone can fit in.

 

Christine

This for me too! I also taught and never tried to put kids into a mold. What drove me away from teaching was the testing and guidelines that were thrust upon me to conform to. What a joy it was to finally see the light and realize that I could teach at home! I have 2 kids in PS as well but this only makes me more of an advocate for their rights and individuality.

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Not entirely. I have felt that some of the ps posts/polls have an agenda behind them, like public schools are superior to homeschooling. Now maybe I am just being overly sensitive in this regard, but Feb. is a hard month for some hsers and I am very protective of new or burnt out hsers.
:iagree::iagree: This is happening on other homeschool boards too. I'm not for censoring either, but it IS hard enough to homeschool and remain positive about it and believe we are doing the best thing for our kids when I see more and more posts praising how much better ps, private school, CC, co-ops, online etc. etc. than 'just' homeschooling every time I turn around. Sometimes it's really hard to even say "Homeschooling is still the best choice" on ANY homeschool board without getting kind of beat up for it, KWIM? But of course----any discussion about all of our options should be civil and kind for sure ;)

 

I believe the attached article concerning astroturfing and persona management software would support a more sinister explanation than just the weather...

 

http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/georgemonbiot/2011/feb/23/need-to-protect-internet-from-astroturfing?CMP=twt_gu

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I believe the attached article concerning astroturfing and persona management software would support a more sinister explanation than just the weather...

 

http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/georgemonbiot/2011/feb/23/need-to-protect-internet-from-astroturfing?CMP=twt_gu

 

How very interesting. Of course, for all we know, you yourself could be a "managed persona," Barry. ;)

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:confused: I was speaking about the onslought of pro-PS threads as the prior posters (which I quoted) alluded to...I'm not following you, sorry.

 

I was making a joke. Sorry :). I just meant that any pro-this or anti-that posts could be suspect, then.

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Barry Goldwater, are you trying to tell us that you are an astroturfer? :lol:
:lol:

 

I have to admit that a soon as I hear the word "agenda" applied to those who simply don't share our viewpoint, my eyes glaze over. Think Occam's Razor folks. I feel for anyone who is feeling the February Blues -- and I know I am -- but it's not the job of other people on this board to coddle you. I've seen no one be disrespectful of homeschoolers or homeschooling (at least if they've been at it long enough :tongue_smilie:), though there has been plenty of disrespect in some other threads. I'd counsel anyone whose anxiety is being heightened by hanging out here to avoid the threads that upset them. I do that with certain political threads, and my world has not yet been turned on its axis.

Edited by nmoira
typo
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Excellent. Much better than :willy_nilly: Nobody agrees with me! It must mean they've all been abducted by aliens!!

 

I just noticed we here at WTM do not have a tin foil hat smilie, which is a shame...:D)

 

I actually really care about all of you here. Well...not those of you with fake personas trying to sell me Denim Jumpers.

 

:lol:

 

I have to admit that a soon as I hear the word "agenda" applied to those who simply don't share our viewpoint, my eyes glaze over. Think Occam's Razor folks. I'm feel for anyone who is feeling the February Blues -- and I know I am -- but it's not the job of other people on this board to coddle you. I've seen no one be disrespectful of homeschoolers or homeschooling (at least if they've been at it long enough :tongue_smilie:), though there has been plenty of disrespect in some other threads. I'd counsel anyone whose anxiety is being heightened by hanging out here to avoid the threads that upset them. I do that with certain political threads, and my world has not yet been turned on its axis.

Edited by LibraryLover
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We'd be throwing the windows open and playing outside without jackets if it made it to 40! Just saying, it's all in the perspective.

 

BTW, -5 oF this morning for church. At least a month before we can hope for a thaw, and then we get a major flood for the THIRD year in a row. Sandbag Season started last week around here!

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I see more and more posts praising how much better ps, private school, CC, co-ops, online etc. etc. than 'just' homeschooling every time I turn around.

 

For some families, in some situations it absolutely is better than 'just' homeschooling.

There is no way on earth I can teach my son AP Calculus BC. No Way. So our family uses the local public school in addition to our homeschooling.

 

I love knowing I am welcome to share my frustrations and successes here even though our method is different than most.

Edited by Crissy
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However, I guess I missed all the ps bashing. Most of what I have seen in the last few days seems to be closer to hs bashing ex- we probably aren't doing as good as ps etc.

 

:iagree: I haven't seen the ps bashing either. I'm surprised that would be the focus in Susan's comments here. I guess having read Susan's viewpoint here, I'd have to say that this board's general perspective and attitudes actually do seem to reflect her position pretty well.

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:iagree: I haven't seen the ps bashing either. I'm surprised that would be the focus in Susan's comments here. I guess having read Susan's viewpoint here, I'd have to say that this board's general perspective and attitudes actually do seem to reflect her position pretty well.

 

:iagree: It's good to know!!

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I think it is hard to give a personal opinion based on personal circumstances without coming across as bashing the other side. If I have had a bad experience with my local public school and I share that, it will be difficult to not sound like I'm bashing public schools in general. Kind of like the working mom verses stay at home mom discussion. All I have to do is choose one or the other and I'm making a statement that offends someone.

 

:iagree: Despite our poor results in our local public school there are others in the district that are doing a great job. I don't think there is a one size fits all solution for all kids because I think all kids/families are different. And if I win the lottery there is a local private school I'd run to put my youngest in. :D

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I agree that there shouldn't be wholesale bashing of any one choice. I do hope that this board can continue not just to support the choice to home educate, but to champion it. At the beginning of my homeschooling journey, I remember reading The Lost Tools of Learning in which Douglas Wilson specifically discouraged parents from trying classical education at home. He argued that the classroom would do a much better job than parents could do. How disheartening.

 

I do think the posts on this board have changed over the past 10 years, reflecting changes in the homeschooling population.

 

Lisa

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I have really only recently started to post on these boards, but my overall impression is that in an attempt to be supportive of all educational choices, there really isn't support for those who are firmly committed to homeschooling. Homeschooling is a tremendous amount of work, and can be very tiring. Those of us who are homeschooling need encouragement. Honestly, I think it is very important to have a board that boosts those who may be temporarily discouraged. Perhaps there should be a homeschool encouragement section for those of us who need to hear or are willing to give words of encouragement. I have had my own "yellow school bus days", in which I feel tempted to send the kids on that bus the following day, but have been blessed with friendships IRL to help me remember my original reasons for choosing homeschooling. It would be nice for those who don't have much local homeschooling support to find that inspiration here. If that is not okay here these boards perhaps someone could direct me to another board where that is permissible.

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I have really only recently started to post on these boards, but my overall impression is that in an attempt to be supportive of all educational choices, there really isn't support for those who are firmly committed to homeschooling. Homeschooling is a tremendous amount of work, and can be very tiring. Those of us who are homeschooling need encouragement. Honestly, I think it is very important to have a board that boosts those who may be temporarily discouraged. Perhaps there should be a homeschool encouragement section for those of us who need to hear or are willing to give words of encouragement. I have had my own "yellow school bus days", in which I feel tempted to send the kids on that bus the following day, but have been blessed with friendships IRL to help me remember my original reasons for choosing homeschooling. It would be nice for those who don't have much local homeschooling support to find that inspiration here. If that is not okay here these boards perhaps someone could direct me to another board where that is permissible.

 

I think you are perfectly fine coming here or going somewhere else for encouragement. The problem is when we use the word "encouragement" to mean "everything about the ps is evil." That is probly not the best motivation to Homeschool, or if it is then another forum might be better.

 

My undestanding, is that this forum is dedicated to Classical Education. If that is thru homeschooling, afterschooling, or alternative schooling...all should be welcome to get encouragement for the Classical education they are trying to provide.

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