fairfarmhand Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 with me, my kids can be annoying. Dramatic. Sassy mouthed. Rude. Hateful. Argumentative. Then someone from church or other classes they take (where I am not present) tells me, "Your children are wonderful! They have such great manners, they are so kind to the other kids." If I ever mention that we have a problem at home they something like, "Well, I just can't ever imagine her doing that!!!" (not that they think I'm fibbing, they just can't picture it) WHO ARE THESE KIDS THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT????!!!! AURGH!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BakersDozen Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 My dc hear this from me quite often: "Too bad you don't act like this in front of the people at church/at the store who say how wonderful you are!" :glare: There was one Sunday when my dc started to squabble as soon as the van door closed and I jumped out, flung open the door and said LOUDLY, "Please keep arguing so everyone can hear!" They shut up fast and stayed that way all the way home (smart kids). :glare: (again) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Margo out of lurking Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 Isn't it a blessing to know that your kids will come through when it counts?! We see our kids at their worst--just as they see us. It's impossible to be perfect all of the time. For them to know when it is important is good enough for me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 Well, that is wonderful. Unfortunately, my 12 year old got in trouble last week at the church we were visiting! Sigh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirch Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 My dc hear this from me quite often: "Too bad you don't act like this in front of the people at church/at the store who say how wonderful you are!" :glare: There was one Sunday when my dc started to squabble as soon as the van door closed and I jumped out, flung open the door and said LOUDLY, "Please keep arguing so everyone can hear!" They shut up fast and stayed that way all the way home (smart kids). :glare: (again) :lol: Love that--too funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 I think this can be good and bad. Certainly, it's normal for all kids to be on their best with others and on their worst behavior at home. Think of the consequences if they acted in public like they do at home! The fact that they can behave in public demonstrates that you have taught them good values and they have the skills to act on those values. That is what will help them be successful in the academic and business world and in general social relationships. However, I think the bad news is that the way our kids act at home is predictive of how they will behave at home as adults, too---just a grown-up version of their kid self. Of course, not as pronounced, but the echoes could be there. I think a lot of teenagers don't give this the thought they need to. Not "fighting fair" with mom or dad, being dramatic or manipulative to get your own way--all these things bear potential seeds of relationships to come. It's not a 1.0 correlation, but it is something for them to think about. (This isn't directed at the OP; I'm simply musing about things in general.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sasharowan Posted January 26, 2011 Share Posted January 26, 2011 Then on the other hand, they can sit through 4-5 hours of funeral and wake helping their best friend bury her father and be strong and helpful to her and save the bickering for later at home when it doesn't add to the stress. So there is a good side to having kids that are wonderful in public. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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