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so what made u to decide to homeschool your children


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I am currently not homeschooling. I afterschooling for many reasons.. the school is a joke and principal is a idiot.... I wanted to homeschool but have a job that I can't easily give up.. So what is your "final push" that made you decide to homeschool??

 

I was a teacher till DD was born. I tell people it's like a waiter who won't eat in his own restaurant. I saw too much stuff behind the scenes and I couldn't bring myself to putting my kids in that situation.

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I don't know about my final push, but my first nudge was attending a university with a huge teaching program, and finding that the majority of people going into teaching were basically those who couldn't handle the difficulty-level of any of the other majors. :glare: I was not impressed.

 

Also, Minnesota used to have awesome schools, but now we're sort of middling. I can do better for my dd than they can.

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I'm not sure if I can remember the straw that broke the camel's back. I think the biggest thing was the school's assumption that it had MORE right than I did to make choices about her education, and that they just plain knew better than my husband and I what was right for her.

 

I believe that a school should serve families, not rule over them. When it became obvious that the school teachers and admins were on a serious power trip and behaved as if all parents were neglectful, abusive idiots until proven otherwise, I quit.

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Being a homeschool grad, my dh and I leaned this direction anyway. However, we did our due dilligence and had a pre-K evaluation with the county's GT program coordinator.

 

She told us that my son would be incredibly bored academically, and that socially and developmentally (physical readiness) he wasn't ready. She said that if I wanted the best for my son, I would need to homeschool him.

 

He is still ahead of his peers academically, and still a bit developmentally immature.

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Well at first it wasn't that we were going to homeschool when we had kids. But when we did have children and started talking about schools we wanted to make sure when we bought our first home it wasn't too far from the elementary school because we are a 1-car family and dh works in the city so it's highly unlikely that I'd have transportation to get the kids so I needed it to be in walking distance to get take them and pick them up. So our first home purchase was 2 blocks from the elementary school. It wasn't until our oldest dd was 5 that we found out that elementary school didn't do kindergarten. Only did grades 1-6!

 

However...when we found out that the ONLY kindergarten school was across town we didn't have much of a choice by law but to homeschool because we didn't have family nearby that was reliable or friends that had children that were going to that same school. So I brought up the idea of homeschooling and dh thought it was a great idea for preschool and kindergaten. It wasn't until we were completing kindergarten that I decided to register my oldest with the same homeschooling academy that we found upon registering her for kindergarten for the following year. I found out about homeschooling more through the past church family we had as there were ALOT of homeschooling families. Sadly we were one of the only homeschooling families still when we departed from that church family and moved into a new church family, where we are the minority as well and PROUD!

 

We're now going on 4 years of homeschooling! For me it wasn't really a big shock because I will admit....I NEVER liked the idea of letting my kids get on a bus full of kids and drive to another location where they were in SOMEONE else's care ALL day!! AND in all that disaster of a mess were to learn and thrive and make friends...I felt and still do feel that NOT one person in the school can take care of my children like I can....even when it comes to teaching. Plus I never liked the teacher to kid ratio in a classroom! I mean..I have 3 kids and things happen ALL the time when I turn my head for an INSTANT and I can't imagine the things that are going on when the teacher is occupied with the 29 other students! Never appealed to me!

 

And for dh. It was proof in the pudding. He needed to see that homeschooling WAS working for not only the kids but for our family structure. And he wanted to see that I could handle the schooling as well as the housework. And I agreed that I could handle it and I do :) Somedays are better than others...:001_huh:but the laundry will not get up and move so it can sit for 2 additional hours while the kids and I finish baking french bread for our geography lesson! After all the "what if's" from dh and his doubt in the beginning..he's now 100% on board about homeschooling! BUT I'm also keeping it open to HIM that IF things don't work out we'll open the idea of public school (but between you and I....I don't want it to EVER have to come to that...and frankly now neither does my dh!)

 

It's SO rewarding not only to our homeschool but to our family and our marriage that we are on the same page. I can talk about school registration things, grades, deadlines for school fundrasiers our academy is hosting, curriculum and projects and he'll even give ideas and help with school!

Edited by mamaofblessings
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I decided life is too short for me to ship my babies off to a full time job at age of 5. We had no family time and my daughter wasnt being challenged because some of the kids in her 2nd grade class still couldn't read. The classes are at about 25 students to one teacher and much of the school day was spent doing NOTHING educational.

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We always wanted to, but when our oldest son was born with down syndrome and then our younger son was dx with autism, we really thought we couldn't. We thought we HAD to put them in public school. To be honest, with the exception of one rough year for oldest ds (great teacher, not best classmates for him), his special needs preschool years and first 2 years of elementary school were incredible! He had wonderful teachers and made a ton of progress. Our younger ds had a terrible experience in preschool (teacher adamantly refused to acknowledge he had any problems and refused to work with him) but had an excellent kindy teacher and amazing 1st/2nd grade teacher. We found out 2 mos into the second year ds #1 had the worst teacher ever that we most certainly could homeschool and we haven't looked back. :)

 

Final straw for ds #1: went from star student the year before to class troublemaker (found out later it was the awful teacher that we had no idea just how bad she was at the time) plus he had totally and completely lost all the academic progress he had made, substitute cook refusing to follow his dietary restrictions (Celiac disease and lactose intollerance, he had special food the school purchased for him and this lady refused to prepare it), classroom staff more concerned about having to deal with ds's toilet accident (due to the food that was bad for him) than whether ds was okay or not.

 

Final straw for ds #2: the school's refusal to deal with the bullying and teasing and tormenting that ds was enduring daily. I'm sorry, but social skills to me are not leaving my son with autism on the playground to defend himself and him coming home in tears saying he never wants to go back.

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6 seemed too young to send the kids out to fend for themselves without Mamma there to look after them. I'd heard of homeschooling and researched it when I was pregnant with #1. The more I read, the more I thought it would have to be better than working my bottom off to afford to pay someone else to raise them. I had rotten pregnancies, so I figured I deserved to be around for the positive parts of childrearing! And my skills are better suited to this role than any paying job I could get. I kind of feel bad about that, but since I'm doing this, it is good I'm suited to it!

 

If I have responsibility for something, I like to have the power to (try to) accomplish it. That's about sums up the reasons why I'm doing this. Dh is doing this because I want to. He's an agreeable fellow :D

 

Rosie

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Dh hated public school and was told he would never amount to anything. He now has a masters degree in engineering and has been successful in the engineering field for 12 years. He would never put a kid in ps after what he went through.

 

It took me a lot longer. I ended up working with a bunch of people that home schooled. Over the course of several years I became a big home school advocate. I would be OK with a private school, but would much prefer to stay home and educate my dd now. I am very much enjoying motherhood as my second career.:001_smile:

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My son struggled. In 2nd grade, age 7, his teacher told me I would need to work with him at home to get his reading and writing up to speed, and she sat him next to a very advanced Asian boy who could write full paragraphs while my son struggled to write a legible word. This teacher knew nothing about learning difficulties and very clearly was biased towards the bright kids in the class. She jokingly told me she thought she had better read up on ADHD one day-she knew nothing about it. There was a group of boys of my son's ability in the class, and she did nothing for them at all.

 

I tried to work with him after school (we always read aloud before bed but I tried to do more), but when I picked him up after school he was wound so tight he would often explode in rage and/or tears at the slightest provocation. Every day. There was no way he could sit still and do schoolwork- he needed physical activity and relaxation. And, I figured, if he is doing so badly at school, and his self exteem is so low already and he is only 7, why don't I bring him home and just teach him one on one so that he also has plenty of time to run around and be a boy?

 

He agreed to try not going to school. On our very first day we met other homeschoolers in our local park- it seemed like a sign- they invited us to their weekly park days. Within 6 weeks my son was a different child- curious, bright, cheerful- innocent again. His dad was so taken with the change in ds's perosnality (and he was VERY skeptical about the whole homeschoolign idea)he insisted we also homeschool our dd, who was very happy in school. He recognised that the benefits were so much deeper than academics. So we did and here we are.

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I originally looked into homeschooling my son (in public school kindergarten at the time) because he was being pulled from class and placed with the special ed lady. Throw my daughter into the mix (who is gifted) and my other daughter (who was developing some really odd behaviors that sound like SPD) and I threw in the towel.

 

Two years later, my son doing very well and is actually trailing right behind my older daughter in math (he'll end up passing her eventually). Gifted Kid is able to "do her thing" and the kid with the odd behaviors is reading and writing me little stories (and she's 5).

 

We won't go back. Good luck to you.

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I sent my daughter to Kindergarten. It was a full academic day of lots of deskwork, nothing like the fun Kindergarten I remembered. She was frequently losing the meager 15 minutes of recess the kids got for "talking too much," yet these kids had "silent lunches" and almost no recess. And they were expected, at age 5, to just sit at a desk all day.

 

I sent her on to 1st grade, because that's what people do. It was more of the same, with lots of lost recesses, only this teacher also gave her a "demerit" for talking too much (she came home one day, looked at me, started SOBBING and said: "I got a demerit, Mommy. And I don't know what that is, but it's BAD!"). Said teacher also gave her an "F"- yes an "F" in 1st grade! for math one period. Why? Not because she didn't know the work. She did. Because she had some incompletes for A) being sick, B) being on vacation, and C) taking her time with the pictures when they were told to show illustrations for their work and not finishing on time. In the case of A and B, the teacher didn't have time to let her make it up in class and wouldn't send it home. You know, in case I cheated and did it for her or something.

 

I sent her on to 2nd grade, because that's what people do. It was okay- her teacher was very nice. No more losing recesses for talking too much- at 7 she was more able to keep still and quiet than she had been at 5. But they were ridiculously long days, she'd come home with like an hour of homework at LEAST and had like no time to just be a kid. And she'd tell me about a few instances of things kids had said or done on the playground or on the bus, which weren't all that appropriate, and I was thinking Really?! They're, like, 7 and 8 years old!

 

I sent her on to 3rd grade, because that's what people do. Again, she had a super nice teacher. But now came the standardized testing year and that was ALL the school focused on. To the point where the kids were so stressed out and nervous about it- my daughter had stomach aches nearly every single day. She was nervous. She thought she was going to "fail." It didn't matter how often I explained to her that the test was really more for the teacher than it was for the students and so on.

 

I finally just had enough. I happened to know of a family or two who homeschooled (we were in the same stay-at-home-mom's group together when my younger son was a baby and toddler) and I just started reading about it. I read everything I could online, then read some books, then talked to the moms I knew who homeschooled, joined their meetup group, started talking my husband into it...

 

...and finally toward the end of third grade, in March of that year, I pulled her out of public school, began homeschooling, and never looked back. My only regret is not doing it all along.

 

We are now more relaxed, have more fun, less stress, have bonded more together, get to do so many more hands on things and outings out there in the real world that we never had time for, read more books, do more projects, etc. We get sick less, don't need to revolve our entire day and life around a bus or school bell schedule, don't need to get "permission" every time we want to do something as a family on a weekday, and so on. We feel a lot more FREE!

 

My husband gets more time with the kids which was hard before due to his work schedule (he works from like 1 PM to 8 or 9 or 10 PM and every Saturday). And I get to worry less about the middle school "socialization" my daughter might have been subjected to- downright scary if you think about it!

 

I love homeschooling. And while I wish I'd never sent my daughter to public school to begin with, she's home with me now. And at least my son gets to stay home right from the beginning; he's 5 and has not been to preschool and will not be going to public school.

 

ETA: Oh I almost forgot to add- considering how much emphasis the school put on standardized testing, our school is not a very good one, and when the results came out in the paper the last couple of years for how they did compared to the state average on those tests- they were, in almost all cases, below state average.

Edited by NanceXToo
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The thought of sending my sweet five year old to a secular school made me nauseous. Couldn't afford a Christian school, so we kept him home.

 

Our faith is still the primary reason we homeschool, but it tops a list a mile long.

 

Just to throw it out there- I went to a private Catholic school one year in 10th grade despite the fact that our family was not Catholic/Christian, because my mother thought it would be a "better" school than the public school.

 

Yeah right!

 

Drug deals at lunch period, smoking in the bathroom, hiking up the little plaid skirts as far as you could get away with, bullying, and everything you would want to avoid in a public "secular" school were happening there in that religious school, too.

Edited by NanceXToo
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Even before we were dating, both dh and I were very adamant that no child of ours was going to ps in Louisiana. We had decided we were going to homeschool for K since we were living in Hawaii at the time and we knew the schools were awful. I got cold feet and enrolled her anyway because we didn't have a reason not to. It was awful.

 

We moved and same story. Heard schools were bad and wanted to hs but didn't because we didn't have a reason to. I pulled her out after 6 weeks. This went on a couple of times a year until this year. We'd move, I'd enroll and we'd have a bad experience. We've had every problem you can name from 2 hrs. of homework in the 1st grade to abuse. Sometimes I'd pull them out and sometimes I wouldn't. Finally I've given up and decided no school will be good enough.

 

Besides, if I were to put them in school every time we moved, my kids would be at their 10th and 8th schools by the ends of 4th and 2nd grades. There's a heck of a lot more consistency with homeschooling.

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My older 3 primarily went to ps. We brought my middle son home when he was a 7th grader and my oldest dd home when she was finishing her first 1/2 of her senior yr of hs. My oldest graduated from public high school. We brought the other two home because of stuff that was happening in ps with teachers mainly and after talking to the principal was told that there was nothing that could be done.:001_huh:After my ds came home my dd begged to come home.

Fast forward to adopting our two youngest some25+ yrs later? I knew from the moment we had them that if it was at all possible I would home school them. I wanted them to have a better education than any of my older kids got in pub. school. My dd when I brought her home could NOT properly construct a sentence say nothing about understand how to write a paragraph. SHE WAS GOING TO GRADUATE IN ANOTHER 4 MONTHS. :confused:

I also did not want my youngest exposed to so much of the yuck that is so prevalent in the schools now. I knew that home schooling was what was best for them and me.

It has not been easy but so much better than ps would be. I have had to learn what to expect of them and myself.

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What first got me thinking about it was that I didn't want to send my 5 year old to full-time kindergarten. I went half a day and managed to read all the first grade books in kindergarten, and I guess played the rest of the time, and turned out fine. A full day is too much for a 5 yo, in my opinion. So I didn't want to do kindergarten. Then I started reading everything I could find, thought about my experiences as a social worker/mental health worker in the public schools and how the kids I worked with could disrupt the entire class so that the teacher spent time with them instead of the ones who wanted to work, and decided I wanted no part of that for my child. I also didn't want to drive 30 mins each way for private school, didn't want the pressures of it, and didn't want to spend an hour or more each day sitting in a carpool line. Figured I could get school done in the time I'd spend in the carpool line in the early days. I do wistfully think of the free government babysitting I'll be missing out on sometimes, though :glare:

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The short story is my DD developed epilepsy. She did better when she could work at her own pace and rest when she need to according to her medication schedule.

 

It also helped that I was/am an attachment parenting, baby-wearing, co-sleeping, extended breastfeeding mom...so it was on my radar all along. (I have no babies but that "mindset" of attachment parenting is still here. ;))

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I am currently not homeschooling. I afterschooling for many reasons.. the school is a joke and principal is a idiot.... I wanted to homeschool but have a job that I can't easily give up.. So what is your "final push" that made you decide to homeschool??

 

That makes it really tough. :grouphug:

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My oldest went to 2 years of preschool. I had never even considered homeschooling until I met a homeschool family at LLL. The mom was a former elementary teacher and said from what she saw when she was teaching she would never send her kids to school. Her oldest son at the time was around 7 and I was just the nicest kid and talked all about science and other things they were doing for school. It really peaked my interest so I started reading about it.

 

We were also in a crappy school district at the time. My neighbors 6 yo dd had been punched on the bus more than once and I knew I could not let dd ride the bus. We only had one car that dh took to work so transporting her would have been difficult so I just decided to keep her home that year and we haven't looked back.

 

This year is the first year we've used the ps at all. We live in another state in a different district from when we started and the schools are better than where we lived before. My oldest has had such a hard year I'm really hoping to have her at home next year. Plus they practice for the state mandated testing every day I don't know how much dd is learning. I always felt like I probably wasn't doing enough as a homeschooler but I'm finding that I was really probably doing okay. I'd like to have my dd back. She is always complaining about having headaches or being tired since she started school. She claims she doesn't like homeschooling either though. It's hard to know what to do sometimes.

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For me it was the last IEP meeting of last year where the school basically said they had no idea what to do with ds. It seems they had modified his work so much that going into the 7th grade he had the writing skills of a 2nd grader. They kept telling me he was going into advanced math but he had no idea about how to write a complete sentence.

 

I was floored. I had never gotten any returned papers the WHOLE year so I had no idea. And in my defense he was PASSING!! It's not like he was flunking language arts.

 

Add to that the fact that at least once a week I would have to pick him up from school because of him being bullied.

 

For my dd the reason is different. I've read a lot of books on gender bias in the schools and that combined with the fact her birthday is in Sept. so she will not be able to start kindergarten until the year after next also played a role.

 

I have 2 children still in the magnet school and they will stay there until middle school. I have nothing but good things to say about their school.

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The short story is my DD developed epilepsy. She did better when she could work at her own pace and rest when she need to according to her medication schedule.

 

It also helped that I was/am an attachment parenting, baby-wearing, co-sleeping, extended breastfeeding mom...so it was on my radar all along. (I have no babies but that "mindset" of attachment parenting is still here. ;))

 

DITTO!

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Seeing a teacher's issues effect my son's grades. Reading the opening of TWTM written by Jessie Wise and describing why SHE decided to hs. It sounded so much like what we were going through with ds and what dh had been through in school. We realized, we were looking at a situation that could have a life long impact on how our son saw education, learning, reading, excelling, and success. Having someone else tell us what we already suspected was true (smart kids can become nonlearners) put us into the situation of either ignoring what was going on and how it would probably turn out or getting off our duffs and parenting our sons.

 

I know that sounds over-the-top, but we knew then that this wasn't something ds would just move on from. We were setting him up to live our lives over again. Once we saw that, we couldn't UNsee it, iykwIm. Knowing that, our excuses for not hsing rang hollow. It all started to sound like we were just too lazy. I could not imagine my sons becoming non-reading nonlearners, because I was too lazy to start parenting them and, imo, that is what it boiled down to for us. We either did what was best, right and most difficult, or I moved into the principal's office and let my son languish while I tried to "fix" the system.

 

I figured out that the system meant way less to me than my children.

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There was a lot of build up for us. I had wanted to since my oldest was small, but NO ONE I knew did it. It was practically unheard of in my area, so to school they all went.

 

My oldest was a very advanced reader, and wasn't being challenged at all in 2nd grade (the teacher used her to help teach the other kids) So, I switched schools. (didn't really help) We had some good teachers over the years, but they couldn't overcome the system.

 

We got to my oldest in 6th grade (middle school) and my twins in 3rd when it all started really going downhill.

 

My third graders were stagnating in classes that were scrambling to meet all the NCLB requirements. Because of the lack of activity and challenge, behavior problems in the classrooms were skyrocketing. One of my twins had the same teacher 2 years in a row. The first year she was awesome, and Miranda learned SO much. The second year she was frustrated, unable to teach like she used to, and Miranda wasn't learning anything. For 6 of the first 8 weeks, they had absolute silence days... 7 & 8 year olds made to be completely quiet ALL day, with often no recess. Sarah, the other twin, really disliked her teacher and also was learning nothing.

 

Then we had my oldest in middle school. She was learning a lot, but it had nothing to do with academics :001_huh: The final, final straw was when my dd's friends started getting beat up right in front of her, just because they were good kids. (like her friend getting his jaw broken because he told another boy that getting flashed by a woman was gross)

 

And you want to know what's REALLY funny. That town was named the best in TN to raise a family...and one of the qualifiers was a good school system...because you know, our test scores came up more than anyone elses.

 

We prayed about it, and felt that God was telling us to get our girls out of the PS system. We brought them home and haven't looked back.

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Dd was falling further and further behind. I knew she was smarter then that. She also seemed to have lots of stomachaches during the school year. I would see her come home looking so sad and crying when I got out any homework she had to do. Finally, I couldn't take it anymore and told my dh that I was going to homeschool her. He was doubtful but knew that dd was unhappy. We homeschooled her for 6 years and my only regret was I didn't homeschool her from the beginning.

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My kids were at a great private school. But I was missing out on them. I wasn't having any real time with them, just "do this, do that".

 

I started to pray about homeschooling. When I brought it up to my DH, he told me that he had been praying about it, too and was specifically praying that I would bring it up. He didn't want to tell me to do it; he wanted it to come from me.

 

We pulled them out mid-year and we are still happily (most of the time) homeschooling 3 years later. :)

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It was a mix of things for us.

 

I have a BSE music ed. I went through all of the education classes, and I student taught. I saw *exactly* what goes in a ps from the adult perspective. I was appalled to hear the way teachers talked about children in the teacher's lounge (not to mention the way those attitudes came through in student interaction). I was appalled at the lack of reading, writing and math skills of some Ed Dept. graduates...one of the things I said to dh (we went to the same college) to convince him to HS was, "Do you REALLY want ----- teaching your child to write a sentence?" His reply was, "Oh, NO!":001_huh::lol:

 

Still, when our first was a baby we decided we'd wait until it was time to enroll him in Kindy and evaluate every option we had. Private school was too expensive. The public schools were overcrowded and they bused kids all over, regardless of how close you live to an elementary school (over an hour on a bus, daily:glare:). I tutored a 3rd grader who went to the schools my dc would have attended...and was FLOORED-STUNNED-DISGUSTED by how behind she was. She couldn't tell me 2+3=5. The worst part of it was that her parents explained to me how the teachers said that knowing the basic math facts wasn't that important.:glare: 3rd grade. :banghead:

 

We had the pleasure of meeting several wonderful HSing families in that town (not surprised, considering the state of the ps's there LOL). We saw how this HSing thing could really work.

 

Reading TWTM might have been the nail in the coffin...in the sense that any classroom I might consider now has to compete with the awesome education I can give at home. It would have to be an amazing school/teacher to convince me to give up what we have going here.

 

Oh, the job/finances are a tough point.:grouphug: We sacrifice on that end. There are lots of things we can't do b/c we don't have the $. The bottom line is that I can't buy back these years later. When they are even 10-12yo, it will be too late to give them much of what I want for them. When they are 18yo, I might be able to pay their college tuition if I worked out of the home all of their childhood, but I can't give them the work ethic and academic foundation needed to actually DO the work of college and life. I realize that I am working myself out of a job and will see a day when my youngest leaves the nest, and that will leave me in want of a career to fill my days. Funny thing, having been a SAHM for almost 8 years now, I would NOT choose the career I chose as a 20yo.

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Drug deals at lunch period, smoking in the bathroom, hiking up the little plaid skirts as far as you could get away from, bullying, and everything you would want to avoid in a public "secular" school were happening there in that religious school, too.

 

Oh, I have no doubt, Nance!

Like I said, my list for homeschooling is now a mile long :lol:.

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Gifted dd in gifted school, bored to tears, and always getting in trouble. She had lots of friends (which helped her tolerated school), but soon closed off to any new learning and became indifferent about life. They killed her love of reading and writing, made her feel inadequate, and told me she had ADD-inattentive (she didn't) and wanted her on medication :001_huh: .

 

So I got fed up with the whole elementary/middle school system (with no choice of schools). After 5 incredibly successful years of a child-led education (where she soon regained her love of learning, enthusiasm, and drive), she was accepted into a fantastic high school and is making excellent grades. Homeschooling was the best decision we've ever made.

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I had always said "I'll never homeschool!" I grew up in and now live in the

"best" school district in our area. Graduated valedictorian, and figured that school would be just fine for my boys. HA!

 

First grade was wonderful - fully engaged, excited, motivated teacher who really cared about the kids' learning.

 

Second grade - wasted year. Teacher was retiring that year, and did the bare minimum. Chastised my son for reading The Lord of the Rings instead of the "classroom books" she wanted him to read (on grade level). Son's personality started changing - became more unsure of himself.

 

Third grade - wasted year. Brand new teacher! Very nice guy, but he was new to the classroom, and had at least 5 very disruptive kids in the class. He missed a lot of days because of a very ill child, and was trying to rebuild his house to deal with mold issue that caused the illness. I sympathized with his issues, but I could see my son falling farther and farther behind. I tried afterschooling, but by the time ds got home, he was fried emotionally and physically. I felt like I was losing my son - he was literally withdrawing, and was not responding to my efforts to connect with him.

 

Fourth grade - I realized that this had to be a turning point for us, and was forced to face my fears of homeschooling. Private school was not an option, and the public school had no interest in partnering with me to help meet ds's academic needs. Administration was very friendly until you, God forbid, had a need or concerns.

 

We jumped into homeschooling, and haven't looked back. The feeling of freedom was amazing - no more bureaucrats to please (except for the state of PA :glare:). We read lots and lots of books, and he was free to pursue his passion of history. No more viewing Disney's Pocahontas and calling it history, like his 3rd grade class did.

 

A defining moment for me in our homeschool journey was having my ds tell me that he was glad we started to homeschool, because "now I feel like I know you."

 

Over the past 7 years, I've realized that the valedictorian label I earned, I earned for playing the school game, not actual learning. Interacting with and observing my boys while they delve into subjects, I realize that they aren't cramming and then forgetting. They have learned more and retained more than I ever crammed and forgot.

 

Homeschooling has been an absolute blessing to my family, and I'm afraid my family would look very different today had we not taken on the challenge.

 

Sorry for the rambling! I truly regret not starting out with homeschooling, but on the other hand, perhaps I wouldn't have fully appreciated it's benefits had we not experienced the PS.

 

I'm glad to be part of the journey, and hey, I get to buy more books! :lol:

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When my older daughter was 2, I read WTM. Spent over a year wondering if I could do it, and eventually decided to take the plunge. So my kids have never been to school. We've had some serious financial troubles, and so now we belong to a homeschooling charter and I have a little part-time job, but we're hanging in there.

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When our oldest was 5 we lived in L.A. We visited several schools. One had "great Americans" week featured. Not one white man in the lot. One had their playground across a 4 lane street, next to a city park and high school. They (the K-6th gr) "struggled" with drug issues. One (another k-6th) had several pregnancies among their "older" students.

We knew that we'd only be in L.A. a couple more years and knew enough about education to get through phonics.

 

I also wrote a Master's thesis around that time on "Why Parent's Homeshcool." It was a small case study (this was 20 yrs ago and homeschooling wasn't widely accepted yet). The study showed that those who homeshcooled from the beginning did so for academic reasons. Those who pulled their kids out at a later date did so for because of social role selection reasons (i.e. their kids were being bullyied, ostracized, failing). In other words, their kids were being pigeon holed.

I'm curious if these outcomes would be the same with the growing acceptance/population of homeschooling.

The Lit Review for my thesis was on the History of Education in America. Given what we learned about the goals, vision and methodology of government school we decided that it wasn't something we could agree with.

Edited by laughing lioness
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My gifted dd didn't learn one SINGLE thing academically in kindergarten that I didn't teach her myself (she did manage to pick up a few unpleasant behaviors, though :glare: ). They were still working on the alphabet while she was reading novels. The teacher refused to modify for her at all. I was incredibly intimidated by the idea of homeschooling, though, and kept waiting it out, trying to make things better.

 

Every teacher I know socially that saw what she was capable of doing asked me if I'd ever considered homeschooling. :lol: But I still agonized over the decision.

 

Then the government announced that they were switching to full-day K in my province. Kindergarten here is two years, starting the year you turn 4, but had always been half day. It wasn't going to affect my dd, who was just about done with K, but I took one look at my toddler son and knew there was no way, just NO WAY I'd ever be willing to put him in full-day school starting several weeks before his fourth birthday.

 

It was sort of the straw that broke the camel's back, I guess. Dd finished out her year and we sent in our notice of intent to homeschool. It's worked out so well and I'm glad something finally pushed me to do it. ;)

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I considered homeschooling before my oldest entered kindergarten. However, we had just moved across the country and purchased a house mainly for the school district. I decided to send her off to half-day kindy and see how it went. It was fabulous! The school was full of devoted teachers and aides who really wanted the kids to excel. Dd is a bright child and they met her at her level. Parents were encouraged to volunteer in the classroom. I was there as often as I could be. I felt like the school was my partner in my child's education. Discipline problems we few and far between. The principal, a warm friendly lady, dealt swiftly and effectively with those issues. That school was everything I could have hoped for in a school. Dd was there from kindy through most of 2nd grade. Then we moved:glare:.

 

Our new school was nothing like the old one. I put dd into 2nd grade to finish out the year. Even though she should have been a month behind (old school went from Sept-June, new from Aug-May), she was way ahead. I pushed aside my apprehensions and ignored my gut feeling. The next school year I enrolled dd in 3rd and ds in K. Before school started I spoke with ds's K teacher and told her he had taught himself to read at 3, was doing addition and subtraction problems with ease, and was reading chapter books. She blew me off, because obviously I had no training in how to properly assess my child's abilities. Of course, one week later she told me ds was done with K and had nothing left to learn there. I had to bite my tongue so hard to keep from saying "I told you so" I think it bled. I wondered why he couldn't just move up to first. We spoke to the principal about it. She was completely wishy-washy, gave no straight answers, and refused to commit to anything. I was in that office at least twice a week trying to get that woman to do something, ANYTHING, to no avail. Everyone ignored my concerns. Meanwhile, my ds was given books to read in class and extra math while the other students were learning to write their names. Also, dd was being used as an unpaid teacher/paper checker because she was so far ahead. Parental involvement was discouraged as it was thought to be disruptive. Discipline was completely out of control. A 3rd grade classmate of my dd's told a substitute to "F-off" and absolutely nothing was done about it. The library was a joke and doubled as the music room, the cafeteria was also the gym, but the high school football field was state-of-the-art. I pulled them out over Thanksgiving break and have never looked back. My kids will attend those schools over my cold dead body.

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I work in our local public high school subbing for mostly math and science classes (my specialties). When my oldest reached the point where he'd be going there, I pulled all three out. I have few regrets about them being in younger or being pulled out when they were. (Some things I wish had changed, but overall, it worked out well.)

 

For reasons other than academics, my youngest is in our high school now in 9th grade. While he's at or near the top of his class, I still wish he'd be willing to homeschool again. Instead, we're after schooling him in order to see that he gets a decent education.

 

Ironically enough, our principal came on the announcements this morning with "in-school" testing from Sept and Dec. 9th graders (overall) improved 2 percentage points 75% --> 77%. 10th graders DROPPED 11 percentage points 81% - 70%. Juniors DROPPED 14 percentage points 74% - 60% (testing for proficiency or advanced status on reading alone as per our state standards). In other words, only 60% of juniors are at least "proficient" at reading on grade level, yet 74% were when they started this school year.

 

I'm still wondering how that happened, but I'm not all that surprised.

 

The lack of desire to learn in this high school is appalling.

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For us it was reading the Well Trained Mind when my older son was 2. He had started preschool at 18 months and though it was very hard for him to separate from me I was completely on board with making him independent, the socialization at school being the key to success, etc. When I read WTM I got a vision of a different kind of education. I started looking around and in the area I live there are so many activities there would be no lack of "socialization". DH still wasn't on board and by now ds loved preschool so much I didn't think he would like the idea of homeschooling. Then when ds was reading well and dh started thinking of what the heck he would be doing in school (learning the alphabet), and I mentioned the idea to ds and he was very happy to not have to go to school, we decided to just go for it. We had signed ds up at the elementary school down the street and called the Thursday before school started to let them know he wasn't coming in case another child needed his spot. I continue to have thoughts of sending him to school because I worry what he is missing out on, ironic because my school experience was dreadful.

 

Now my younger ds was in preschool 3 years and just started homeschooling. He was in a great private preschool with 3 teachers and lots of other adults facilitating social interactions. I am now realizing that he is a bully magnet and so many kids aren't very nice to him that I am very grateful we are homeschooling. He is a mix of advanced academically but not very mature socially, plus very active and loud. School would be a disaster. I just will not allow him to be bullied by kids OR adults and so I anticipate homeschooling him for quite a while. I am finally seeing the light about the negative socialization that can happen in schools. I think my older son would probably do great in school socially, but not my younger.

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Family time was becoming less and less as my boys got older. School and after-school activities got the best part of the day and my husband and I got the crumbs. Plus I knew I could do a better job educating them.

 

I had a similar experience. I was a teacher in ps before my oldest was born. Then I started a company and sent my kids to private school. I wasn't happy with that b/c we seemed to be chasing our tails most of the time. Then, I decided to start a CM/Classical hybrid as an extension of our church. As Principal then HOS, I spent too much time there and my kids were in after-school for too many hours. Our days were 12 hours long and that is when I was led by the Lord to quit. Homeschooling has been wonderful (most days) and has changed our lives for the better immensely. No regrets and no turning back!!!

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My daughter always struggled in school, although she tests at a very high IQ level. She was labeled as...I don't know...troubled, or something, very early on. She never fit in, was misdiagnosed with ADHD, then properly diagnosed with Asperger's at about 10 years old. Meanwhile, she hated going to school, had no friends, was often bullied and, at age 12, was clinically depressed.

 

She was neither gifted nor developmentally disabled, but clearly didn't learn the same way everyone else did, so she fell through the cracks.

 

In the spring of 7th grade one of the very popular girls handed my daughter a knife in the middle of Health class (God knows where the teacher was) and with a very red face told my child if she didn't take the knife she (the knife giver) was going to stab some other kid. DD took it, not knowing what else to do, but some kids witnessed her giving it back in the bathroom after class and turned her in. Both girls got 10 days of suspension. And while I understand the rules, there is no common sense with this, as the school has no ability to exercise any in the one size fits all environment.

 

So, I decided to try something new, and we've been home schooling since the beginning of 8th grade. It hasn't been perfect, but it has done wonders for her both academically and in helping her gain her confidence. She still struggles greatly with time management, and also socially, but she has actually asked to go back to public school next year, which to me is a positive sign (although I'm internally cringing about it).

 

I've since found out that her troubles began in Pre-K when someone (not sure if it was teachers or other kids) would lock her in a dark bathroom if she didn't behave (her perception...who knows what the real reason was), and I'm mortified by that. Absolutely gobsmacked. I cannot fathom that I didn't know that was happening to my sweet girl and it breaks my heart.

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Initially, son was coming home from Kindergarten in tears, real meltdowns that last half an hour. Then he'd have another one before bed knowing he was going to wake up and go to school. And then the begging in the mornings not to send him. He was later diagnosed with Aspergers so we finally figure out what was going on with him.

 

For youngest dd, I was prepared to homeschool her since her brother was home, but she insisted on going to school. After her teacher forgot my dd was in the library and she missed lunch twice, I brought her home. The teacher had given her an unlimited pass to the library because there was nothing in the classroom for her to learn. My dd spent hours every day in the school library.

 

Since then she's tried school numerous times. It just never works out. Oops, forgot to add that the last time we withdrew her was 5th grade. At least half a dozen classmates taunted her that she was going to hell because she wasn't sure about God. We live in the south.

Edited by Night Elf
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Thank you so much for all your replies. The thing is, with my afterschool experience, I quickly realize that there is no teacher can be better than me teaching my boy. my son is very bright. he is very quiet and reserved. Because of that, I think teacher pays very little attention on him even they know he is way above his grade level. He wasted his K and 1st grade this year bored out his mind. ( he reads RL6 book and doing fraction multiplication/division at this point). I have no choice but to afterschool him to keep him challenged (he is also getting bit arrogant and think he knows everything).

I was not educated in this country until graduate school. I really was not impressed with the teachers I met so far, I don't see the confident in them like the teachers I had when I was little. I hate how they teach, I hate the teacher insist this ridiculous finishing 50 addition/sub qs in 2 mins.. I just loss all my confidense with the teachers at is point.. but my job.. what I gonna do wih my job.......

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Thank you so much for all your replies. The thing is, with my afterschool experience, I quickly realize that there is no teacher can be better than me teaching my boy. my son is very bright. he is very quiet and reserved. Because of that, I think teacher pays very little attention on him even they know he is way above his grade level. He wasted his K and 1st grade this year bored out his mind. ( he reads RL6 book and doing fraction multiplication/division at this point). I have no choice but to afterschool him to keep him challenged (he is also getting bit arrogant and think he knows everything).

I was not educated in this country until graduate school. I really was not impressed with the teachers I met so far, I don't see the confident in them like the teachers I had when I was little. I hate how they teach, I hate the teacher insist this ridiculous finishing 50 addition/sub qs in 2 mins.. I just loss all my confidense with the teachers at is point.. but my job.. what I gonna do wih my job.......

Boredom is so common :( Have you read TWTM? If the new one still has Jessie Wise talking about her son becoming a non-learner, you should read it (you should read it anyway :p, but Jessie's opening will speak voumes to you).

 

As for your job... Can you change your hours? Do you have a spouse, would they help?

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Moving from the city school to the county school system. Seeing that all the kids and teenagers who belonged to said county school system were not at a level of education to have them equal with kids from other systems. Hearing things that were happening in schools, especially the middle and high schools that made my skin crawl. (our local middle school is not allowed to give zeros. So kid can NOT do their homework, not put any effort in their work, because they no the teacher is not allowed to give a zero) Recent graduates saying they never realized how unprepared for real life they were.

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