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Dealing with noisy neighbors - Help!


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The townhouses (all rentals) where we live had the basements converted into apartments years ago. Because of this, there is little to no soundproofing between the floors. When the guy downstairs moved in I went down and told him politely that we could hear his music in our home. He was nice and I thought that would be the end of it. Nope. I have called management on him and he calls management every time we bang on the floor to let him know he is disturbing us.

 

For some reason management is on his side. They say that if he turns it down to a level that we can't hear, then he can't hear it either. :glare:

 

Today it was so loud it bothered DH, who normally is not bothered. He banged on the floor so hard they probably thought the ceiling would cave in downstairs. Guy calls management. Management calls DH. Management holds to it's argument that he can't hear it if he turns it down. DH repeated says "So you are saying that we just have to listen to his music?" Their only solution is to have a meeting with guy, which DH says will not solve anything. They as us to stop banging on the floor at guy.

 

So what can we do? He doesn't play it late at night (which wouldn't bother us since we would be upstairs where we can't hear it). It's always in the afternoon or evening when we want to spend time together downstairs, having school, watching TV, etc.

 

I'm thinking about calling every time he plays his music loud since he calls whenever we bang on the floor and they don't want us to do that anymore. I wish I had a way to measure the decibels to show how loud it is in my home.

 

And no, moving is not an option for us at the moment.

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Could management install acoustic ceiling tiles in his apartment, and a thick carpet in yours?

 

Buy him quality earphones?

 

Play old Carpenters or other music back at him - see how he likes having to listen to someone else's taste in music?

 

PS - odds are, if you can hear his music, he can hear your tv, etc. Management really should do some soundproofing.

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I would think thickly padded carpet would help - or even thickly padded area rugs.

 

I do think that he is entitled to listen to music in his home at a reasonable volume at reasonable times of the day. It sounds like the real problem is that there is no soundproofing. If he's really cranking it, you have a legitimate complaint, but if it's really just that all the sound travels, I'm not sure there is much you can do.

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My brother had a similar problem with an upstairs neighbor playing his piano at 10pm midnight and later. We used to bang the ceiling with a broom handle and the guy would bang back at us.

 

Management was of no use and eventually he moved.

 

Unfortunately I think these problems are common in apartments/townhouses.

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It's too bad you already have a bad relationship with the neighbor, because what you really need to do is get together and speak with management about the problem, and ask them to install some soundproofing in his ceiling. Honestly, the problem isn't the neighbor unless he is blaring his music at 4am; it's the building.

 

If there's that much noise between his apartment and yours, there's a good chance that the building wasn't appropriately fireproofed, and that could be a violation of your local building codes. You may want to visit your local town hall and ask about that, because if the building isn't up to code, that could be a real nightmare for the management, and they may be more than willing to rectify your noise problem to keep you from filing a complaint against them.

 

Cat

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I can hear my neighbors' "noise" (music, arguments, four wheelers, cars at 3am, dogs, kids, etc.) most of the time and I don't live in an apartment. I wouldn't complain about music or any other noise during normal hours - only night hours. As someone else pointed out, he can hear your footsteps all day, too. Why would that be okay, but noise from him isn't?

 

It's part of living in attached housing.

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opera?

 

Or

?

 

Generally, though, I agree with some of the others. Some tolerance is necessary. It really depends upon how loud it is inside your apartment. The guy who lived above me in college had a band, he played the drums and they regularly practiced in his apartment. I never banged on the ceiling, but I did go knock on his door in my pajamas at 3 am several times.

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I have tried being tolerant, but some days it's very hard. Yesterday evening i could hear guitar music over my son's screams from a bad bump on the head. And if I can hear it over the TV, doesn't that constitute too loud?

 

Yes, I would think that would be considered too loud. But again, the problem may not be the guy as much as the building. He has to be allowed to make some noise, just as you should be protected from hearing a good part of it.

 

Cat

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I lived in an appt once where I could hear which toys the children were playing with.:glare: Thankfully, we were on good terms with the neighbors, our dc were the same ages and we could coordinate nap times most days. LOL

 

It stinks though! I agree with calling management and keep pestering them until they install some soundproofing.

 

Another thought: he might be just as annoyed with "kid sounds" and the music might partly be to drown that out.

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If you can hear him then I would say he could hear you. Perhaps he is attempting to drown out the noise of a crying child, your tv, foot steps or conversations. I can see both sides getting very frustrated :grouphug:. Ideally the management would help solve this dispute by helping with soundproofing some. Until they do you could always dance and sing loudly to the music:).

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It's too bad you already have a bad relationship with the neighbor, because what you really need to do is get together and speak with management about the problem, and ask them to install some soundproofing in his ceiling. Honestly, the problem isn't the neighbor unless he is blaring his music at 4am; it's the building.

 

If there's that much noise between his apartment and yours, there's a good chance that the building wasn't appropriately fireproofed, and that could be a violation of your local building codes. You may want to visit your local town hall and ask about that, because if the building isn't up to code, that could be a real nightmare for the management, and they may be more than willing to rectify your noise problem to keep you from filing a complaint against them.

 

Cat

 

:iagree::iagree:

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I remember a situation years ago when I lived in a similar housing arrangement. There were complaints of noise back and forth. One day one of the neighbors stood in my apt. and realized it wasn't us just being loud just the normal stuff seemed much louder when traveling through the duct work.

 

My sister who lived in an apt. where you could hear things and conversations often. The tenants would frequently turn their music up when they were entertaining dates.

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Do you hear him except for the music? If you do, then maybe the popular response of "if you can hear him, he can hear you" is correct. I don't agree with that though, if all you are hearing from the neighbor is loud music. Sometimes my neighbors, who are a good distance away, blare their music and I find it disturbing. I can guarantee you they cannot hear us at all and I can never hear any of their activities other than the music.

 

As for what to do about it, I have no idea, but it would drive me batty too.

 

Lisa

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I have tried being tolerant, but some days it's very hard. Yesterday evening i could hear guitar music over my son's screams from a bad bump on the head. And if I can hear it over the TV, doesn't that constitute too loud?

 

Maybe he was trying to drown out the screams and tv noise coming from your apartment?! I mean, sound travels both ways.....

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How miserable for you both! I hated living in apartments, and sometimes we would get a neighbor that was unreasonably loud. I remember when two young men moved into the apartment behind us. We shared a wall in every. single. room. Their love of very loud rap music with major bass was almost the death of me and my dh. I think I was only about 23yo or so, but I felt like an outraged grandma when the more, ahem, adult lyrics would come through the walls. Good times, those.

 

Anyway, is moving a total impossibility? If management isn't sympathetic, I can't see that you have any other recourse.

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Maybe he was trying to drown out the screams and tv noise coming from your apartment?! I mean, sound travels both ways.....

Yep. I used to live next to a guy in a band. Got to hear him practice occasionally (he tried not to practice most of the time in the apartment, but elsewhere) and found out that he could hear my Phantom of the Opera cd's even though I did not have them up that loud. We laughed over it.

 

The worst was living in one duplex where the other gal's bed was against a wall that my kids' bunkbed was against. She'd have male company over and when that bed got a'rocking, the headboard sounded like someone was trying to tear down the wall! My kids would wake up crying not knowing what was going on. Dh and I had to switch rooms with the kids. We put a tv near that wall and turned it up when need be.

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PS - odds are, if you can hear his music, he can hear your tv, etc. Management really should do some soundproofing.

 

Not necessarily. In our rowhouse, I can hear the people on one side regularly, but they apparently rarely hear us. And I rarely hear the people on the other side, but they apparently sometimes hear us. I think it's to do with the set ups of things and how the rooms are positioned - which way TVs and people are pointed and so forth.

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The townhouses (all rentals) where we live had the basements converted into apartments years ago. Because of this, there is little to no soundproofing between the floors. When the guy downstairs moved in I went down and told him politely that we could hear his music in our home. He was nice and I thought that would be the end of it. Nope. I have called management on him and he calls management every time we bang on the floor to let him know he is disturbing us.

 

For some reason management is on his side. They say that if he turns it down to a level that we can't hear, then he can't hear it either. :glare:

 

Today it was so loud it bothered DH, who normally is not bothered. He banged on the floor so hard they probably thought the ceiling would cave in downstairs. Guy calls management. Management calls DH. Management holds to it's argument that he can't hear it if he turns it down. DH repeated says "So you are saying that we just have to listen to his music?" Their only solution is to have a meeting with guy, which DH says will not solve anything. They as us to stop banging on the floor at guy.

 

So what can we do? He doesn't play it late at night (which wouldn't bother us since we would be upstairs where we can't hear it). It's always in the afternoon or evening when we want to spend time together downstairs, having school, watching TV, etc.

 

I'm thinking about calling every time he plays his music loud since he calls whenever we bang on the floor and they don't want us to do that anymore. I wish I had a way to measure the decibels to show how loud it is in my home.

 

And no, moving is not an option for us at the moment.

 

 

Put on your own music at a level that will drown out his?

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Have you asked management to go to his home and be there with the music at a reasonable volume, and then, while the music is the same volume....go to your home. That way they can check the validity of both tenants.

 

If lack of soundproofing is the problem....can you move to another apartment? Since you have kids, preferably one on the bottom level so their playing won't be a bother to someone else.

 

Maybe investing in some rugs or foam mats would help? Or a white noise machine?

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Yep. I used to live next to a guy in a band. Got to hear him practice occasionally (he tried not to practice most of the time in the apartment, but elsewhere) and found out that he could hear my Phantom of the Opera cd's even though I did not have them up that loud. We laughed over it.

 

The worst was living in one duplex where the other gal's bed was against a wall that my kids' bunkbed was against. She'd have male company over and when that bed got a'rocking, the headboard sounded like someone was trying to tear down the wall! My kids would wake up crying not knowing what was going on. Dh and I had to switch rooms with the kids. We put a tv near that wall and turned it up when need be.

 

:001_huh:

 

I think I would have gone over and knocked on the door and told her to move the @#$%^ bed! Sheesh!

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:001_huh:

 

I think I would have gone over and knocked on the door and told her to move the @#$%^ bed! Sheesh!

I had seen her room...she has heavy wooden furniture and there is no way she would have taken time to rearrange. She eventually moved and we had a lovely Rastafarian family move in.

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