FB age limits--would you be comfortable with this?

[Julie in CA]

We're having a lean year (like most people), and I've been looking around for gifts that I can give my dc that are free.

 

Dd age 14 has asked me in the past for a Facebook page, and because she's very responsible, I'm going to wrap that up as a gift for her. She already has email.

 

Dd age 12 (will be 13 in June) has asked for an email and/or FB. I seem to remember that maybe there's an age minimum of 13? (Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong...) What if I sign up for a FB as "Amy (& mom)", and then only allow her to post/chat with my approval and participation each time. Is that following the rule, or circumventing the rule? :confused: My dd's would both be very thankful for that gift--and it's free. ;)

[LidiyaDawn]

If you sign up that way, FB might end up closing it - if it "looks" like it's just her.

 

Are YOU on fb? why not just let her chat with people using YOUR account? One of dd14's friends does this (actually all the kids use the mom's FB account)... if she (friend) leaves a comment using the mom's account, she just signs it at the end with her nickname.

[astrid]

Hi Julie,

GREAT ideas!

 

I cant' help with the age requirement question. Dd (13)does not have a FB account, but that's mostly of her own choosing. She's really active on a knitting forum (Ravelry) and has teens with whom she chats about knitting, life in general, etc. It seems to satisfy her "social networking" urge without going whole-hog into FB.

 

That said, DH and I both have FB accounts, and we probably would allow her a FB account under her first name if she asked, with express control such as you describe. I also know several of her friends, and little sisters/brothers of those friends who have their own FB pages with strict parental controls/supervision. One mom I know allowed her 4th grader to have an account so she could play Farmville with some of her cousins who live abroad, and keep in touch with them.

 

If I were you, dear Santa, I think I'd allow them both the privilege with your watchful eye.

 

Merry Christmas!

astrid

[Dawn in OH]

For the kids under 13, they have Togetherville. It's connected to Facebook, in fact you can control your child's Togetherville account via your Facebook account. I don't know a whole lot about it, I just started looking into it. You might want to take a look at that.

[Julie in CA]

For the kids under 13, they have Togetherville. It's connected to Facebook, in fact you can control your child's Togetherville account via your Facebook account. I don't know a whole lot about it, I just started looking into it. You might want to take a look at that.

Ooohhh....I didn't know about that. Thanks! I'll check on that.

[JoyfulMama]

Dd age 12 (will be 13 in June) has asked for an email and/or FB. I seem to remember that maybe there's an age minimum of 13? (Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong...) What if I sign up for a FB as "Amy (& mom)", and then only allow her to post/chat with my approval and participation each time. Is that following the rule, or circumventing the rule? :confused: My dd's would both be very thankful for that gift--and it's free. ;)

 

To quote FB's Terms:

You will not use Facebook if you are under 13.

 

HTH!

[DaffodilDreams]

I won't get into the semantics of FB's own rule, but I will say that there must be a way around it. I know of at least 6 young ones that have their own accounts, and they are not yet 13. One of them is 9. I will say that most of the young ones I know have the accounts listed under fake names (and obviously fake - like some of our names on this board), so that must be a compromise between the children and parents. Thank goodness for that, anyway! My dd began asking for her own account at 6, but I have not given in. I don't know when I might begin to consider it, but certainly not for awhile. One of my rules is that she must master proper spelling and grammar first, so I have a few years still before the question should come up again! :tongue_smilie:

[astrid]

Ooohhh....I didn't know about that. Thanks! I'll check on that.

 

Me neither! Thanks for the info!

 

astrid

[Julie in CA]

With what I have in mind, is it really her using it, or is it me using it on her behalf? The name will be both of us, the profile picture will be both of us, and I will be the one creating the profile info. I will post messages/updates for her, but will allow her to compose them with me. She will get to chat with grandma, cousins, and anyone else from the friends list that I will approve, during times that I'm with her in the room.

 

I have an overworked sense of guilt though, and I'm not sure I can allow myself to break the rule, even just by bending it. :001_huh:

 

It will be a very very stingy Christmas if I don't give this gift though. :001_unsure:

[Emmy]

With what I have in mind, is it really her using it, or is it me using it on her behalf? The name will be both of us, the profile picture will be both of us, and I will be the one creating the profile info. I will post messages/updates for her, but will allow her to compose them with me. She will get to chat with grandma, cousins, and anyone else from the friends list that I will approve, during times that I'm with her in the room.

 

I have an overworked sense of guilt though, and I'm not sure I can allow myself to break the rule, even just by bending it. :001_huh:

 

It will be a very very stingy Christmas if I don't give this gift though. :001_unsure:

 

FWIW I think this is *fine* and I would not allow yourself any guilt over bending.

[phathui5]

It will be a very very stingy Christmas if I don't give this gift though

 

Are you part of a church? Maybe they could help?

[LisaKinVA]

For the kids under 13, they have Togetherville. It's connected to Facebook, in fact you can control your child's Togetherville account via your Facebook account. I don't know a whole lot about it, I just started looking into it. You might want to take a look at that.

 

Thank you for this! I had no idea. I'm getting my dh to set up my kids' a "togetherville" account, with our @lastnamefamily.com e-mail addresses!

 

GREAT Stocking "stuffer.":D

[Julie in CA]

Are you part of a church? Maybe they could help?

:D I may be beyond help!

I prefer to think of myself as strongly ethical, rather than hopelessly neurotic. :lol:

[Princess Peach]

I believe the reason for the no one under 13 rule is due to COPPA. That's why Facebook is so strict with it, at least on paper. I know my 10 yo niece has one. :confused:

[In the Rain]

Hmm, I didn't even realize there was a minimum FB age. I have several young relatives with their own accounts. One is only 7. Some have fake names, others don't.

[joannqn]

I know a couple of kids under 13 who have Facebook accounts; however, a while back two of them suddenly disappeared. Based on one mom's comments, I think Facebook deleted them because she certainly didn't.

[Hoggirl]

I believe the reason for the no one under 13 rule is due to COPPA. That's why Facebook is so strict with it, at least on paper. I know my 10 yo niece has one. :confused:

 

I am a strict rule follower myself, so I probably wouldn't do it. Sounds like the Togetherville is your answer!

 

When my ds went through confirmation at church (grade 6, all the kids were 11 and 12) the director of our children't ministry set up a group for the confirmation class! Ds was not on fb, had not asked to be on fb, etc. until that point. I copied and pasted the fb rules to her via e-mail and also said that I felt like she was undermining my parental authority by encouraging joining fb. Her reply? A passive-agressive nothing.

 

Sorry. That story was totally irrelevant.:tongue_smilie:

[milovany]

I won't get into the semantics of FB's own rule, but I will say that there must be a way around it.

 

Yeah, the parents (or child) types in a birth date that makes them at least 13; that's the only way around it.

[littlefurfamily]

I just signed my children up for Togetherville too!

[Word Nerd]

The big sister in me would say getting a Facebook account would be a more special gift to your older DD if she were the only one who got one now--especially since your younger one isn't technically old enough yet. The Togetherville account sounds good, though.

Edited December 22, 2010 by WordGirl

[Deb in NZ]

Ds#2 wants an FB account. As I refuse to let him lie about his age, he's been told that he can set up a FB account on his 13th birthday. He was disappointed at first.

 

Dh & I feel that choosing what rules to follow & what rules to ignore isn't what we want for our dc. If we allowed them to lie to get FB, what's stopping them from lying to get into bars before they're legal if "everyone" does it.

 

JMHO,

[Elisabeth in IL]

I made an account for my son who is 11 to keep in touch with friends who live 1/2 to 1 hour away. I gave an incorrect year for his birthday. It was the only way for him to have one that I could see.

[Julie in CA]

Ds#2 wants an FB account. As I refuse to let him lie about his age, he's been told that he can set up a FB account on his 13th birthday. He was disappointed at first.

 

Dh & I feel that choosing what rules to follow & what rules to ignore isn't what we want for our dc. If we allowed them to lie to get FB, what's stopping them from lying to get into bars before they're legal if "everyone" does it.

 

JMHO,

Umm...technically, she's not getting a FB account, nor is she lying to do it. It would be *me* getting a FB and posting content that includes her, and allowing her to read the home page and help me compose updates. I'm also not at all hesitant to say that it's really nothing like lying to get into a bar before they're legal because "everyone" does it. Equating those two things actually makes me :lol:. As ethically bound as I tend to be, even I can see that underage bar-hopping and lying to do it is not the same thing as sitting next to your mom and chatting with grandma on FB! :D

[Hannah C.]

Umm...technically, she's not getting a FB account, nor is she lying to do it. It would be *me* getting a FB and posting content that includes her, and allowing her to read the home page and help me compose updates. I'm also not at all hesitant to say that it's really nothing like lying to get into a bar before they're legal because "everyone" does it. Equating those two things actually makes me :lol:. As ethically bound as I tend to be, even I can see that underage bar-hopping and lying to do it is not the same thing as sitting next to your mom and chatting with grandma on FB! :D

 

The way you're phrasing it, this sounds to me like it would be okay. It could be seen as "bending" the rules, yes..but if *you* are the one controlling it, and you are directly supervising all her actions on it, and you are the one whose birthdate is on the profile -- basically, if you're always there whenever she's on it -- then it's your account, not hers.

 

The official Facebook rules are that no one under the age of 13 can have a Facebook account, because of COPPA. You have to put in a birth date that makes you at least 13 in order to register at all. In addition, people can report accounts with false birth dates, and parents can have their under-13-yo's accounts removed through a similar process. So this is probably why some underage people's accounts have disappeared.