Do your kids do this?

[fairfarmhand]

If I spell things out for my dd 13 in detail telling her exactly what I expect I get "I'm not an idiot mom. I can figure it out" But if I don't do that, she won't do it according to my expectations and I get "well, you didn't tell me."

 

 

AAAUUUURRRGGGHHH!!!

[NicksMama-Zack's Mama Too]

:glare:

[lionfamily1999]

Yes.

 

Once they interrupt I say, "Are you sure you know what you need to do?"

 

At first they would always say yes, but then they had to do things over (the right way/my way). Now, they think about it a moment and normally apologize and ask me to finish explaining it.

 

Making them redo the whole thing the right way made a big difference. Also, I made sure that they acknowledged they had cut me off in the middle of the instructions. They can't very well say, "You didn't tell me" when they had refused to listen ;)

[newlifemom]

Yes.

 

Once they interrupt I say, "Are you sure you know what you need to do?"

 

At first they would always say yes, but then they had to do things over (the right way/my way). Now, they think about it a moment and normally apologize and ask me to finish explaining it.

 

Making them redo the whole thing the right way made a big difference. Also, I made sure that they acknowledged they had cut me off in the middle of the instructions. They can't very well say, "You didn't tell me" when they had refused to listen ;)

 

I like your thinking. :D

[AngieW in Texas]

I get this from my 17yo. I was about ready to strangle her when we went to the cc campus to get a copy of her transcript to send for her college application and also to pay for her spring semester classes.

 

I tried to go over what she needed to say while we were in the car on the way there because I wanted HER to be the one to talk to them. She said that, "I KNOW what to say. I'm not a baby. You don't have to tell me."

 

When we got through the line and up to the person at the desk, the lady asked my dd what she was there for and my dd said, "I don't know. Ask my mom." (all said in a horribly snarky voice)

 

We had a LONG talk in the car afterwards about how she was NEVER EVER going to do that again.

[lionfamily1999]

I like your thinking. :D

It took a lot of me pulling out my own hair to get there :lol:

[BakersDozen]

Oh yes, this sounds familiar! We've done what lionfamily does yet when my stubborn 13yos continued in his foolishness it took giving him 6 extra tasks that he had to listen to my instruction on without interrupting and do them to completion (meaning MY way, lol). I told him he was being given an opportunity to practice respectful listening and follow-through.

[WTMCassandra]

Mine try. I flip it around on them. "Okay, so tell me, what do I expect?" Then I let them tell ME. If they really do know, then fine. And if they don't, and they verbally trip all over themselves, they listen a little more humbly when I finish.

 

It actually works better when I just tell them to do something and ask straight up: What are Mom's expectations? Then we don't even start the cycle.