misscometa Posted November 17, 2010 Share Posted November 17, 2010 My ds is so unmotivated, he takes ages to finish his work, especially Math, and then the "careless mistakes" it's driving me insane. Is it the age? or the fact that he's a boy? Please help, I am at my ropes end... :confused: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 17, 2010 Share Posted November 17, 2010 Find what makes him happy and take it away. Seriously, dd was getting horrible about getting done on time and doing her work fairly neatly. One day last year at the beginning of the year I choose to let her miss dance (it is what she does) one day. I didn't have any problems the rest of the year - especially on dance days. This year at the beginning of the year, like the second week, I had to keep her home from karate as a reminder. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted November 17, 2010 Share Posted November 17, 2010 What is his age? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarreymere Posted November 18, 2010 Share Posted November 18, 2010 DD7 does that. If I am in the mood I bake cookies and tell her she can't have any unless her work is done, in a reasonable amount of time and neatly. It kills her to watch DS3 eat cookies and laugh at her. I'm also not above giving her a whack on the butt with my 'rod of power' (wooden spoon) and she knows it so if I get out the 'rod of power' and carry it around with me she usually starts getting busy. If she is taking too long (usually with math) I set a timer for how long I think she should need and tell her if it goes off and she isn't done she gets spanked. It usually works. Some days she has to test me, and yes I will whack her on the butt two or three times to help her get focused. That happens maybe once or twice a month. I did have one (now grown) that refused to be intimidated by the spoon, that one just hated having to sit in the corner with nothing to do (made her nuts). You have to find out not only what he likes and take it away like the previous poster said, but also to find out what he fears or hates and offer that too. Geez, this sounds like 'Machiavelli's guide to homeschool'! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Tara~ Posted November 18, 2010 Share Posted November 18, 2010 (edited) Yeah, what's the age? My guess, due to current similar problems, is 13. Though my 11 yr old has some moments as well. But this is definitely my 13 yr old boy. Ugh. And apparently he doesn't like anything enough for *that* tactic to work. Edited November 18, 2010 by ~Tara~ can't punctuate properly ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NancyNellen Posted November 18, 2010 Share Posted November 18, 2010 I have a trick that works with my dawdler - I assign the evens of a math assignment. If it gets done by the assigned time and he gets no more than x wrong (based on the number of problems - usually 2 for every 20) he doesn't have to do the odds. If he dawdles and makes too many careless mistakes, he does the odds. He has learned that it benefits him to be diligent :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tohru Posted November 18, 2010 Share Posted November 18, 2010 Yeah, what's the age? My guess, due to current similar problems, is 13. Though my 11 yr old has some moments as well. But this is definitely my 13 yr old boy. Ugh. And apparently he doesn't like anything enough for *that* tactic to work. lol! I know, huh? Everything is complacent at this age, nothing is important. Grumpy, grumpy, grumpy. Gotta love this age! :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garga Posted November 18, 2010 Share Posted November 18, 2010 It probably won't help, but my son was dx'd with ADHD (and it's no mistake--the child is waaaaaaaaaay more hyper than other kids his age. It was downright embarrassing), and when we gave him medicine to help him focus, he started doing all his work quickly and accurately. Overnight. It was pretty remarkable. It probably doesn't help you, but am just throwing it out there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misscometa Posted November 18, 2010 Author Share Posted November 18, 2010 What is his age? 10, almost 11. 5th grade. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misscometa Posted November 18, 2010 Author Share Posted November 18, 2010 Yeah, what's the age? My guess, due to current similar problems, is 13. Though my 11 yr old has some moments as well. But this is definitely my 13 yr old boy. Ugh. And apparently he doesn't like anything enough for *that* tactic to work. His 10, and I'm with you, I've already taken something he likes, and does not work... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misscometa Posted November 18, 2010 Author Share Posted November 18, 2010 I have a trick that works with my dawdler - I assign the evens of a math assignment. If it gets done by the assigned time and he gets no more than x wrong (based on the number of problems - usually 2 for every 20) he doesn't have to do the odds. If he dawdles and makes too many careless mistakes, he does the odds. He has learned that it benefits him to be diligent :-) I tried this, and it's not working either... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eternalknot Posted November 18, 2010 Share Posted November 18, 2010 If it's an otherwise decent kid, I'd take a few weeks off and recharge the batteries. I know even I can become unmotivated at times -- bored, needing a chance of pace, etc. We do year-round school because of this; it just fits our personalities better. We always do math and latin/grammar, but for a few weeks here and there throughout the year we'll skip the other subjects and do a unit study or something. Still school-ish, but not school-y. Science experiments, arts/crafts, building, boy scout badges, field trips, etc. It works for us because I know my kid is a good kid, a decent student, and he won't grunt TOO MUCH when we get back into the groove of things LOL. He's just a lot like his mama, and needs a breather every now and again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misscometa Posted November 18, 2010 Author Share Posted November 18, 2010 DD7 does that. If I am in the mood I bake cookies and tell her she can't have any unless her work is done, in a reasonable amount of time and neatly. It kills her to watch DS3 eat cookies and laugh at her. I'm also not above giving her a whack on the butt with my 'rod of power' (wooden spoon) and she knows it so if I get out the 'rod of power' and carry it around with me she usually starts getting busy. If she is taking too long (usually with math) I set a timer for how long I think she should need and tell her if it goes off and she isn't done she gets spanked. It usually works. Some days she has to test me, and yes I will whack her on the butt two or three times to help her get focused. That happens maybe once or twice a month. I did have one (now grown) that refused to be intimidated by the spoon, that one just hated having to sit in the corner with nothing to do (made her nuts). You have to find out not only what he likes and take it away like the previous poster said, but also to find out what he fears or hates and offer that too. Geez, this sounds like 'Machiavelli's guide to homeschool'! :lol: You made me burst in laughter, thank you, I needed it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misscometa Posted November 18, 2010 Author Share Posted November 18, 2010 It probably won't help, but my son was dx'd with ADHD (and it's no mistake--the child is waaaaaaaaaay more hyper than other kids his age. It was downright embarrassing), and when we gave him medicine to help him focus, he started doing all his work quickly and accurately. Overnight. It was pretty remarkable. It probably doesn't help you, but am just throwing it out there. Thank you Garga, I did had him seem for ADHD, but guess what? he ended up being gifted instead...:001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mysticamethyst Posted November 18, 2010 Share Posted November 18, 2010 I have one like that he is 16. He has long days when he pulls this. More than 3 wrong and we do it all over again and electronics are gone for 24 hours. This works wonders and he is a techno junkie like his dad. I will not lie tho, it is a constant struggle to get him to do anything; he is extremely unmotivated to do anything. I always have to hold his electronics over his head to get the work done. I hope you find something that gets your guy moving.:grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted November 18, 2010 Share Posted November 18, 2010 My ds is so unmotivated, he takes ages to finish his work, especially Math, and then the "careless mistakes" it's driving me insane. Is it the age? or the fact that he's a boy? Please help, I am at my ropes end...:confused: After three prompts to focus, tonight, I told my son there would be one more math problem for each purposeful pencil drop, etc. We did two extras. It ate into his swim time. I am betting he will do better tomorrow. :) When my son was younger and didn't focus as well as he does now, I realized he marched on his stomach. If he did VERY well, he got ice cream after dinner AND we knocked off math 10 minutes early. If he did well, he got the ice cream. If he didn't do well, no ice cream. Man does ice cream motivate him! Now, it is usually getting to the gym or playing chess with daddy or reading with me. If we are working late (like the three Rs and a science project) I'll let him watch a documentary when we are done. He is hot to get extra time on that, too. So, I'm more of a rewarder, and less of a punisher. However, kiddo does not have electronic games, free screen time, etc, so such things are rewards, not rights taken away. HTH. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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