Is this acceptable for a Y coach?

[Mommamia]

I guess you would call him a coach. Maybe he is a teacher? My dc participate in a small homeschool gym class at the YMCA. The class is supposed to teach different sports skills as well as good sportsmanship. The children are between 7-9yrs old (6 of them). There are a couple of kids in the class who goof around in a way that is annoying to my dc. For example, today they were playing floor hockey. One of the boys grabbed my son's stick out of his hand, threw it in the goal net and yelled goal.:glare:

As we were signing out my son explained what happened to the coach. I was standing there...the coach said nothing. He sort of laughed and ignored my son. I told my son that we could talk about it in the car(which we did).

 

I feel that the coach should be correcting this behavior. Something like this happens every single week. One week, they were playing baseball. The other kids would laugh whenever someone struck out. Do you think the coach should be doing something? The coach looks like he just graduated from college. One more thing....when my dc came in today they said "hello Coach". He said nothing...just kept looking at his Blackberry. Eventually he said "oh, hey guys" very low key.

[lionfamily1999]

It's possible he was hired by the group (or is a parent) and has nothing to do with the YMCA beyond the hsing group.

 

When we have done the hsing PE at the Y it's been all about fun. There were some "sports" played and some group games and things, but the majority of the time was spent playing. It sounds like the other kids are just having a good time, not caring if they or anyone else strikes out, just frolicking, so to speak. Your ds sounds very serious (not a bad thing, my ds is too) and there's a chance that something more loose, like this group sounds, is not a good fit.

 

You could complain, and they might even change... but it could be that those other kids are having a great time and being more structured would kill the fun for them. Just something to consider. This is why we rarely do YMCA gym. Younger ds loves it, but older ds can't stand the way the rules are bludgeoned.

[phathui5]

It wouldn't hurt to talk to him about correcting the kids' behavior. He may not be comfortable telling people's kids what to do, but it's something that coaches need to do.

[Snickerdoodle]

The class is supposed to teach different sports skills as well as good sportsmanship.

 

Erm... sounds like the class is not meeting its intended goals.

 

Fail.

[Mommamia]

Yep, I think that is why I'm annoyed...because the class is not meeting it's goals. Honestly, I know that kids will be kids, but my dc don't like it when other kids tease(anyone) are rude or hurtful. They know that this happens, but we would rather not deal with this in a gym class.

 

The coach is on staff with the Y. He teaches many different classes. I believe he may not really know how to handle the situation and may feel uncomfortable about it. I overheard him talking to his boss about a cooking class for kids that he was about to teach. He stated that he doesn't even know how to cook. Ummm? I'm disappointed, but as long as my dc enjoy the class(for the most part) then we will continue.

 

I guess I can think of this as another "learning experience" for my dc.

[lionfamily1999]

Erm... sounds like the class is not meeting its intended goals.

 

Fail.

I'm guessing this is because they laugh at strike outs, but I have to wonder if this is laughing with or laughing at. If it's six kids, I am more inclined to believe it's laughing with... As in, it's so funny that none of us can hit the ball, or it's so funny that we have to swing wildly because our "coach" can't pitch the ball.

[Rosy]

In our experience, some of the Y staff are great and some are just ok. My kids used to go 2x/week to a PE/games class. Some of the staff would keep things going pretty well, enforce behavior standards, etc. Some just put in a minimal amount of supervision--enough to keep things safe, but not actually making sure rules were followed, etc. One would sit the kids down regularly and lecture them on their behavior. :glare: There are enough that do a good job that it's been worth it, but I don't really think of it as PE as much as a safe place to drop the kids off so I can work out. They're all in sports and we swim when we can and they play group games sometimes at co-op.

[cindergretta]

:glare: Our PE experience at the Y was less than stellar. You could certainly talk with the "leader." Do the parents typically stay during this session? If he is young, the coach/leader/teacher may feel uncomfortable saying anything.

 

We had a large group at our Y homeschool PE program. It was run by two young females who liked to have the kids run laps. It was boring and poorly run. They were too uptight with the older kids and too uncontrolled with everything else. (They like to stand around and talk to each other. Whateva!)

 

We quit going to the group thing and now just take our dc on our own for rock-climbing, swimming, racquetball, etc. :)

[Snickerdoodle]

Well, goofing around isn't really good sportsmanship either. If you're paying for a team experience, then the kids should focus on learning to play the game as a team effort. If half the kids are goofing around, maybe they're better served by a playdate at the park.

 

JMHO, as usual.

[lionfamily1999]

Well, goofing around isn't really good sportsmanship either. If you're paying for a team experience, then the kids should focus on learning to play the game as a team effort. If half the kids are goofing around, maybe they're better served by a playdate at the park.

 

JMHO, as usual.

I see your point ;)

 

My middle ds would have blown his top, but he doesn't have much of a funny bone (youngest would've howled with the best of them :lol:)... maybe that's why I see it differently.

[Snickerdoodle]

:D

Edited October 27, 2010 by Snickerdoodle

[Mommamia]

I'm guessing this is because they laugh at strike outs, but I have to wonder if this is laughing with or laughing at. If it's six kids, I am more inclined to believe it's laughing with... As in, it's so funny that none of us can hit the ball, or it's so funny that we have to swing wildly because our "coach" can't pitch the ball.

 

Nope. It was 2 siblings who were doing the laughing . They were laughing at the kids who struck out. Definitely not with. These are nice kids, I'm guessing they don't know any better. My dc are trying to learn the games and play fair. Having a hockey stick torn out of their hands, getting laughed at, or bear hugged during a game is not ok.FYI-I sit in the hall reading a book while they are at class so I hear it all.

[Mommamia]

In our experience, some of the Y staff are great and some are just ok. My kids used to go 2x/week to a PE/games class. Some of the staff would keep things going pretty well, enforce behavior standards, etc. Some just put in a minimal amount of supervision--enough to keep things safe, but not actually making sure rules were followed, etc. One would sit the kids down regularly and lecture them on their behavior. :glare: There are enough that do a good job that it's been worth it, but I don't really think of it as PE as much as a safe place to drop the kids off so I can work out. They're all in sports and we swim when we can and they play group games sometimes at co-op.

 

Thanks for this info. This was our first time. I'm thinking that my expectations were too high.

[Mommamia]

:glare: Our PE experience at the Y was less than stellar. You could certainly talk with the "leader." Do the parents typically stay during this session? If he is young, the coach/leader/teacher may feel uncomfortable saying anything.

 

 

We quit going to the group thing and now just take our dc on our own for rock-climbing, swimming, racquetball, etc. :)

 

I'm the only parent that stays. I'm leaning toward doing our own thing too.:001_smile:

[Mommamia]

Well, goofing around isn't really good sportsmanship either. If you're paying for a team experience, then the kids should focus on learning to play the game as a team effort. If half the kids are goofing around, maybe they're better served by a playdate at the park.

 

JMHO, as usual.

 

I know. I feel like I am just paying for babysitting.

[HeidiKC]

I work at the Y, and I think what you should do is WRITE a letter to the Center Director. I would probably send an e-mail, so you know it gets to him. I would very nicely list all your concerns (bullets! I'm big on bullets, though). Maybe throw in some things you really do appreciate about the YMCA. Ask him to call you to discuss it.

 

It just sounds ridiculous. I'd be concerned that here is a young guy who the kids probably think is some kind of role model, and he doesn't even have basic manners or respect the kids. I feel like phones/palm pilots/etc. should not even be VISIBLE when he is welcoming a group of kids to class. That shows disinterest, lack of respect for the kids, and plain bad manners. Same with him just laughing at your son and not responding.

 

Sorry you are having to deal with this. If you write the letter and nothing improves after a few weeks, I think I'd call the director again. If you are not satisfied with his response, call your local association or get the e-mail of the head dude and e-mail him. Sounds kind of harsh, but it will get results and you'll be doing lots of other members a favor! Hopefully it won't come to that, though. My guess is the Center Director will get on it immediately.

 

Good luck!

[Mommamia]

I work at the Y, and I think what you should do is WRITE a letter to the Center Director. I would probably send an e-mail, so you know it gets to him. I would very nicely list all your concerns (bullets! I'm big on bullets, though). Maybe throw in some things you really do appreciate about the YMCA. Ask him to call you to discuss it.

 

It just sounds ridiculous. I'd be concerned that here is a young guy who the kids probably think is some kind of role model, and he doesn't even have basic manners or respect the kids. I feel like phones/palm pilots/etc. should not even be VISIBLE when he is welcoming a group of kids to class. That shows disinterest, lack of respect for the kids, and plain bad manners. Same with him just laughing at your son and not responding.

 

Sorry you are having to deal with this. If you write the letter and nothing improves after a few weeks, I think I'd call the director again. If you are not satisfied with his response, call your local association or get the e-mail of the head dude and e-mail him. Sounds kind of harsh, but it will get results and you'll be doing lots of other members a favor! Hopefully it won't come to that, though. My guess is the Center Director will get on it immediately.

 

Good luck!

 

Thank you so much!! Great advice.

[lionfamily1999]

Nope. It was 2 siblings who were doing the laughing . They were laughing at the kids who struck out. Definitely not with. These are nice kids, I'm guessing they don't know any better. My dc are trying to learn the games and play fair. Having a hockey stick torn out of their hands, getting laughed at, or bear hugged during a game is not ok.FYI-I sit in the hall reading a book while they are at class so I hear it all.

Well, then I was just on a whole different planet with what I thought was going on :p

 

Sorry!

 

And Heidi's advice sounds very sound :D

[mirth]

( 

 

[In The Great White North]

The coach looks like he just graduated from college

 

I guess I can think of this as another "learning experience" for my dc.

 

I think this is a learning experience for the coach too. And no one is giving him any guidance.

 

I work at the Y, and I think what you should do is WRITE a letter to the Center Director. I would probably send an e-mail, so you know it gets to him. I would very nicely list all your concerns (bullets! I'm big on bullets, though). Maybe throw in some things you really do appreciate about the YMCA. Ask him to call you to discuss it.

 

It just sounds ridiculous. I'd be concerned that here is a young guy who the kids probably think is some kind of role model, and he doesn't even have basic manners or respect the kids. I feel like phones/palm pilots/etc. should not even be VISIBLE when he is welcoming a group of kids to class. That shows disinterest, lack of respect for the kids, and plain bad manners. Same with him just laughing at your son and not responding.

 

Sorry you are having to deal with this. If you write the letter and nothing improves after a few weeks, I think I'd call the director again. If you are not satisfied with his response, call your local association or get the e-mail of the head dude and e-mail him. Sounds kind of harsh, but it will get results and you'll be doing lots of other members a favor! Hopefully it won't come to that, though. My guess is the Center Director will get on it immediately.

 

 

This is a great idea, if the director is a competent leader. If he is only concerned about the bottom line, he may just fire the kid and hire another inexperienced, just-out-of-college type. If you don't think the director will actually mentor the instructor, you may be more effective mentoring him yourself.

 

A few well placed comments like "The kids appreciate it when you greet them as they come in," "It sets a bad example when you're on the phone when they come in," "You know, kids have a strong sense of right and wrong, so they get stressed when you, as an adult in their lives, don't enforce it. It really bothers the kids when you allow them to laugh at people who strike out," "They really don't know anything about good sportsmanship unless you tell them," etc. You can't dump it all on him at once - he'll just blow that off. It takes a little more time and effort than just dropping off the kids, but you could have a big, positive impact on his life, and end up with an instructor you really like.

 

How important is this to you?