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I did not have siblings, so.....


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I need your help! Ds5, my youngest, has become very melodramatic lately. If you look at him wrong...he goes and cries in the bathroom. Claims of "your being mean!" and "your sooooooo mean!!!!" and various others are consistenly coming from his mouth.

 

I'm losing my patience, and creativity in dealing with this. Sometimes he's right, and the olders are picking on him. Othertimes, they are completely sick of being manipulated by his "I'm telling!"

 

Ideas? Does this pass?

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This is our "general" rule, but I have made some exception for the 5 yr old, simply because the olders can gang up on him. It started that ds5 would react this strongly, because he was standing up to someone who is much more verbal than himself. Now, though it has taken on a mind of it's own :glare:

 

It's okay you can tell me if I am babying him to much ;)

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My brothers and I were very close to our cousins growing up and spent a lot of time together at our grandparents' house. My one cousin was the worst tattletale ever! The other four of us plotted to get away from her as often as possible, which only exacerbated her behavior. Is your 5yo being included? Does he understand that tattling will make him undesirable as a playmate? Fwiw, my cousin's tattling passed... after a year or so - sorry! :001_smile:

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I ask with all listening exactly what happened....must.speak.in.calm.voice....and if there are 2 different stories, I simply confiscate the toy in question or split up the kids and have them sit.sit.sit. No grace.

 

Given this is a 5yo, he may need some prompting in how to handle things if a sibling mistreats him. Your olders may need to be told that they aren't the parent and to come and get you or dh if (annoying behavior) occurs.

 

I'm sure they are all "at fault" and trying to look innocent about it...maybe trying to manipulate you into forcing the other sibling(s) into what they want.

 

I live this daily.:001_huh::tongue_smilie:

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I ask with all listening exactly what happened....must.speak.in.calm.voice....and if there are 2 different stories, I simply confiscate the toy in question or split up the kids and have them sit.sit.sit. No grace.

 

Given this is a 5yo, he may need some prompting in how to handle things if a sibling mistreats him. Your olders may need to be told that they aren't the parent and to come and get you or dh if (annoying behavior) occurs.

 

I'm sure they are all "at fault" and trying to look innocent about it...maybe trying to manipulate you into forcing the other sibling(s) into what they want.

 

I live this daily.:001_huh::tongue_smilie:

 

:iagree:

 

The 5 yo probably does feel picked on in their 5 yo POV. The olders do get tired of the tattling. It's really hard for the littlest to constantly watch the olders do things they can't yet and they get frustrated and they want to be a part of it and if tattling gets them in the group-that's what they do.

 

what time of day does this normally occur? My 4 yo doesn't take naps (not if I want sanity) but that means the last 4 hours of her day can be fraught with whining if the day isn't calm and easy by then. Are the olders cranky ans sensitive? I have one 8 yo that just is not as full of grace as her sister and if there's going to be any insult taken, it's going to be by her. 4 yo particularly loves to grate her.

 

the 5 yo hates to be parented by her siblings--that's a hard lesson to teach them and takes a lot of you stopping what they're going to correct. The 4 yo is told what to do by everyone-some days she just can't stand it anymore. ;) Those are habits to lay down-no parenting the younger and stopping them till they stop themselves.

 

Basically, the variables are limitless and you know YOUR kids. Yes, the little needs to stop tattling, and the olders need to lovingly include them more. How you get there is up to you.

 

And, the baby of the bunch is normally the one with the family Napoleonic complex. :-) I'm kidding. Kinda.

Edited by justamouse
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:iagree:

 

The 5 yo probably does feel picked on in their 5 yo POV. The olders do get tired of the tattling. It's really hard for the littlest to constantly watch the olders do things they can't yet and they get frustrated and they want to be a part of it and if tattling gets them in the group-that's what they do.

 

what time of day does this normally occur? My 4 yo doesn't take naps (not if I want sanity) but that means the last 4 hours of her day can be fraught with whining if the day isn't calm and easy by then. Are the olders cranky ans sensitive? I have one 8 yo that just is not as full of grace as her sister and if there's going to be any insult taken, it's going to be by her. % yo particularly loves to grate her.

 

the 5 yo hates to be parented by her siblings--that's a hard lesson to teach them and takes a lot of you stopping what they're going to correct. The 4 yo is told what to do by everyone-some days she just can't stand it anymore. ;)

 

Basically, the variables are limitless and you know YOUR kids. Yes, the little needs to stop tattling, and the olders need to lovingly include them more. How you get there is up to you.

 

Yup! This is it ;)

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I need your help! Ds5, my youngest, has become very melodramatic lately. If you look at him wrong...he goes and cries in the bathroom. Claims of "your being mean!" and "your sooooooo mean!!!!" and various others are consistenly coming from his mouth.

 

Ideas? Does this pass?

 

When I see melodrama in my house, I bust up laughing. My son can't resist a laugh, no matter how he tries, and his face gets all twisted up while he tries to hold it in. It makes me laugh even harder.

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I have the same.exact.problem with DS4. Everything is a big deal, everyone is looking wrong at him, everyone is "being a bully to me", everyone is "being mean!" On the other hand, they are constantly on his back, one or the other, is just trying to push his buttons. Then the flip side, he's WAY overreacting alot of the times.

 

It's hard, because neither is right in the situation.

 

I don't think I have found a good way to deal with it yet. I feel if the other DS's get in trouble ALL of the time for the little things that make DS4 mad, then it might become a power trip for DS4....but come ON , guys, do you have to bother him EVERY day!?!?! Can the poor kid have a break!?!?

 

So....:bigear:

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