Jump to content

Menu

Do you consult your spouse about Christmas gifts for the kids?


Recommended Posts

I have all three girls make up lists of ideas and then I talk with dh about what we ought to get the girls. I usually do all the actual buying. My dh usually also comes up with something all on his own that he buys online. Sometimes his idea is stellar (the netbook!), but other times it's a huge flop (battle bugs? where did that idea come from ?!?).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

We discuss budget and he looks at their lists and that's about it. He does like to shop for stocking stuffers, but shopping for gifts isn't usually his thing. I show him everything when I get home and before it's wrapped so he won't be in the dark on Christmas morning. :)

 

Unless there's a point of contention that you're aware of and you know that you need to consult him for some reason, then I wouldn't think it's a big deal. However, if my husband really enjoyed shopping for gifts, I would definitely involve him in the process.

 

It's more fun to call him when I'm finished shopping and have him meet me somewhere for coffee and dessert while Grandma watches the kids. ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My Dh decided years ago that he really disliked me doing all the shopping and he would have no idea what the kids were opening as he handed them a box. He wanted to be part of the whole process. We have done our shopping together for years now and it's wonderful. And yes, he does help with the wrapping too.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Of course! He tells me a combination of what he really thinks and what he thinks he's supposed to say. I tell him why he is wrong, and he agrees that I should do whatever I was going to do anyway! It's a ritual that works :tongue_smilie:

 

He's a weird guy who thinks Christmas presents are unnecessary and that the kids should have good Christmas presents unlike a lot of his experiences growing up. Someone that confused really needs to bow to the super-Christmas-shopper missus he has been blessed with :D

 

(Seriously, his mum put an orange in his stocking one year!)

 

Rosie

Edited by Rosie_0801
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Of course! He tells me a combination of what he really thinks and what he thinks he's supposed to say. I tell him why he is wrong, and he agrees that I should do whatever I was going to do anyway! It's a ritual that works :D

 

Rosie

 

I love rituals that work. :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I tell DH what the kids want and dither for ages about what I am going to buy. He agrees with whatever I say during each conversation. By the time I finally buy the presents, he is totally confused about what the kids are getting. I remind him on Christmas Eve.

 

I used to draw up an elaborate table with categories (books, music, art, videos, construction toys, pretend play, play sets, outdoor toys, stocking stuffers, toys all would share, and the like), fill it in with what I was going to get each child, along with the prices, so each child would get the same number of gifts, would have a gift from each category, and I'd have spent roughly the same amount on each. I'd present it to DH, but I doubt he ever did more than glance at it.

Edited by RoughCollie
Link to comment
Share on other sites

We used to go together to select the items. Perhaps it was because we only have a son. Don't know what dh would have done about daughters.

 

Now, it is becoming harder and harder because ds is 19. Today, I joked that we could always get him a gift card for gasoline.

 

Please help us to think of something better than this!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

We used to go together to select the items. Perhaps it was because we only have a son. Don't know what dh would have done about daughters.

 

Now, it is becoming harder and harder because ds is 19. Today, I joked that we could always get him a gift card for gasoline.

 

Please help us to think of something better than this!

 

 

How about a wallet with several small gift cards? Bookstore, movies, starbuck's, whatever he likes?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Now, it is becoming harder and harder because ds is 19. Today, I joked that we could always get him a gift card for gasoline.

 

Get his car serviced? Replace tyres? Guys tend not to think so much about safety or the maintenance required to encourage the longevity of their vehicle. At least that's my experience, your son might be an exception to that rule!

 

Rosie

Link to comment
Share on other sites

He doesn't have a clue what the girls are going to open for Christmas. I think it's the all girls thing...if we had a son then he would feel more comfortable/able to do it. Poor guy will periodically ask them if they want some semi boyish toy only to get shot down:) Plus he can't stand to go shopping,even for himself. It works out to be perfect since I LOVE doing all of it!! Well except for groceries:glare:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not much. Honestly, I hardly even think to. This is a man who can't come up with one item he wants from the grocery store when I do my weekly shopping, so Christmas gift ideas are not his forte. Last year, he did buy both kids BB guns without consulting me. He got a pink one for my daughter. They are only allowed to use them with him and he is very careful, so I'm okay with that.

 

Lisa

Link to comment
Share on other sites

We used to take one day and hit the toy store together. Now, I usually chatter about what I got for them after the fact. If I'm confused as to what to get, I might run stuff by him first. So, no, he really doesn't have much input. He thought my idea last year was awful. He was forewarned. We all took a trip after Christmas instead of gifts. He comes from a family that, imho, overdid Christmas. The thought of boxes not piling up to the ceiling was horrifying. It turned out to be a marvelous holiday!:D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

We shop somewhat independently for a few gifts, consult each other for the big ones, and usually do a "finish up" shopping trip together near the end.

 

Oh, and Rosie, an orange in the stocking is traditional around here! :D I mix it up for humor's sake--mango, chocolate orange, coconut, whatever.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If I see something I really want to get them, I just do. The reverse is true.

 

For a bigger present, we at least talk about it.

 

I learned my lesson one year when I pre-bought all of Christmas to be a good shopper. Had it all bought before December ever hit. A week before, dh felt left out and went shopping for them. The girls had an embarrassingly large Christmas that year. WAY over the top.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

DH loves to buy presents. He often gets them the "expensive" present...often something electronic like a PS2....and I get them "mummy presents" like clothes, books and art supplies (for my artistic dd). We tell them they are all from both of us, but they know how we do it and thank the appropriate parent :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sort of... Dh was a grinch when we first met. He hated Christmas. Our first Christmas was... stressful, because I'm Buddy the Christmas Elf ;)

 

Now that he has children he's gotten better and we have started shopping together and I do consult him before I go shopping solo, but I also buy a ton of stuff we haven't talked about :p I can't help it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well, in our case it would be Hanukkah gifts and what usually happens is my husband finds great deals online and orders cool things for the kids on his own. Then he'll tell ME what he ordered for them. And then I'll tell him if there are certain things I hoped to get for them or that they wanted and either he'll look online, or we'll go shopping together, or I'll go shopping on my own at some point to get the last of the things I want to get for them. (I usually do the 8 presents per kid thing, and they get to open one on each of the 8 nights of Hanukkah).

 

ETA: Oh and if I end up going on my own to get the last few things, no, I don't consult him first, I just pick them out.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest momk2000

I will let him know what I'm thinking about getting or have already purchased, but he's pretty neutral when it comes to stuff like this. He will respond, but I don't think it really matters to him what I get. We have girls, so he probably just doesn't get too excited about all the girl stuff. Even after I tell him everything I purchased for the girls, he somehow appears to be somewhat surprised on Christmas morning??? :rolleyes: :laugh:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

We do discuss it in passing-mostly to avoid us both buying the same Lego set or something, because he does a lot of Ebay shopping late at night after I'm in bed. Not that I think DD would mind having multiples of the same set, but because they're expensive.

 

I don't have to worry about him buying American girl doll stuff-that's totally in my jurisdiction :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hubby and I always talk about what to get our boys. Then we take a day off (date) and go shopping together. He does the wrapping and the majority of the stocking stuffing, but absolutely all purchases are made together - not just for our boys, but for the majority of our extended family too.

 

I love it - he says he does too.

 

We don't get each other gifts. We simply decide on one (more major) item we both want and get it for ourselves.

 

Otherwise, we rarely shop. Neither of us like it... I find it a chore even to go grocery shopping!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

He does most of the shopping as he is the one who can stand to go to places like Best Buy or Game Stop.

 

When they were little, I did most of the shopping online where I could buy sweet little wooden animals, Waldorf-y toys, and such.

 

I think last year was our last Playmobil year, too. :(

 

Although I do enjoy buying art supplies, books, and such. At any rate, we've always talked about what we're thinking of purchasing.

Edited by LibraryLover
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My dh usually lets me get whatever. Every couple years or so he'll come up with an idea we'll run with, like one year we got small air hockey and foosball tables.

 

When the boys were young I asked if there were any toys he'd ever wanted for them and he couldn't come up with one idea. So, I've had free rein for the most part. He's fine with that.

 

I usually spend one day shopping with my mom. :)

 

Gifts for the 19 yr old? Tools, fast food gift cards, shirts, jumper cables. :tongue_smilie:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

We consult on the budget prior to the season. And we consult on the big items ($100/each, or a combined gift around $200-300). Little things, he just says get them what they want or what I think they'll like. He'll go shopping with me if dinner out is included.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I feel like an odd-ball. DH and I do almost all the shopping for the kids together. The very few times I have done Black-Friday sales, he gets up too and we go together. We are usually after a few specific items so we plan where we will go and who will pick up what. I might pick up a few small things when shopping with my mom or if I happen to see something we have discussed prior that is a great deal. Our budget is too tight to not discuss it because we would end up each buying things and going waaay over if left to our own devices. LOL!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Nah. I tell him what I've got on their lists and buy it all, and then he usually tries to come up with a surprise for each kid and doesn't tell me, either. This year I did discuss DS's big gift with him because it's a laptop and he's the IT guy, and he found one he liked and has already bought it, turned it on, and set up the DNS protocols so there won't be any Internet shenanigans, but I think that is the most involved he's been since DS was tiny.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

nope. he hates shopping and doesn't have a clue what to buy for them... we'll chat about something bigger sometimes...like this year dd13 is getting a laptop - she was gonna buy a cheap one with her saved babysitting money, but we'd rather she have something that will actually work & last, so one of her presents will be a GOOD laptop ---- that said, it'll still be me doing the actual choosing & buying of that. ;)

 

overall though, it's my game.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Seriously, his mum put an orange in his stocking one year!)

 

Rosie

 

We always got an apple and an orange and nuts in our stockings. I do the same for my girls. My mother and her brother always got them growing up too. It is tradition here! Of course we put in goodies too though.

 

to the OP..

 

Generally I consult dh w/my ideas and let him know what I am planning. I do all of the budgeting in our family too, so it fits right in. He does go shopping with me though. We enjoy it. Sometimes (usually) he adds something that he picks up on his own too.)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

(Seriously, his mum put an orange in his stocking one year!)

 

Rosie

 

Aww, I have to go down memory lane for a minute here...when my beloved grandmother was around 9 yo (c. 1917), she wanted only one thing for Christmas--a doll. Well, she did get only one thing, but because they were so very poor it wasn't a doll. It was an orange. She said even that was a very rare treat.

 

Fast forward about 70 yrs....my sisters and I found an antique dealer who had a doll from the 1917 era and gave it to Grandma for Christmas! She was speechless!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shopping is not an enjoyable activity for my dh, especially with the crowds before Christmas. He happily lets me go off on my own to do that, either by myself or with a girlfriend. :auto:

And I make sure to take time to sit down with some yummy food to review my shopping lists.

I usually go over my list with him, to which he says "Yes, dear. Yes, dear. That sounds wonderful, dear." :D We do discuss a budget together, but I pretty know how much I can spend, anyway, as we do pay our bills together.

Now, if I am considering a larger item, that is something we discuss, and agree upon.

He will once in a while come up with a gift idea. When he does, I know to listen with an open mind. It's not usually something I would have chosen, but in the end will be a great gift.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...