More from me today. Different subject though. Adopt-a-block

[Parrothead]

So, dh came in with a doorknob hanger at lunch today. I've been trying to decide how I feel ever since.

 

About 2 months ago there was a sign up at the corner for the organization of Adopt-a-block. A couple times I've seen women from this group enmass on Saturday mornings walking down the street handing out fliers. You know the type - perfectly dressed even in jeans. (Yeah, I have issues.)

 

Now my street is not in a bad area. There is a small block of subsidized housing apartments just down the road a piece. The vast majority of these have two working adults. Lots of school age children and one homeschooling parent and child.

 

Other than these apartments the houses on my street are older houses in good repair. There is one being rebuilt. Most were built about the same time c. 1900. Nothing smaller than 2400 sq. ft. Very middle middle class.

 

So this doorknob hanger says:

Harvest blessing

 

 

• Upcoming Local Events
  
• Trunk or Treat at One Denomination Church on Saturday Night Oct. 30
  
• Ladies Night Out a comedian So-and-So and lots of chocolate. No date given at Another Denomination Church Its FREE!!
  
• Movie Night To Save A Life at the local school. Free give-aways. Free admission. Date and time.
  
• Celebrate Recovery meets on Tuesdays at 6. Free Child Care Provided
  
• We will be coming door to door on Saturday October 16 with goodies for the children. If you would like anything specific give us a call by Thursday, and we will bring it if we have it.
  
• Breakfast at 8am
  
• Free clothing at Another Denomination Church from 11-noon. Just walk in the back door to the fellowship hall.
  

 

 

group phone

group email

Logo

 

So, I'm thinking I should call and request a king size Almond Joy be delivered Saturday. Then I'm thinking it is really rude to throw in the substance abuse support group info in their do-good notice. Along with "Oh, the back door." And the movie.

 

I'm really offended for the entire neighborhood. Especially the people who live in the apartments.

 

No, I didn't go to the organizational meeting. I have no idea how many people on the street did, if any. I so want to email this group and tell them that I don't need or want them to come to my house Saturday morning with goodies for my kid.

 

I know I should, and most likely will, ignore this group what they are doing. It just really puts my nose out of joint.

Edited October 11, 2010 by Parrothead

[bettyandbob]

I dunno. Is there any reason you shouldn't just put the flyer in the recycle bin and be done with it.

 

I get stuff put on my door all the time. None of it, I can use, not even the pizza coupons--my kids have celiac. It all goes in recycle.

 

If someone knocks on my door, I'm polite and brief about not needing what they have. Next weekend, you can treat these people the same way you might treat anyone you don't want to visit with. Mostly I say I'm busy, no thank you and close the door. Once on a very hot summer day I gave some LDS missionaries water because I could see how hot they were and there were no water bottles on their bikes (I was worried about them). Mostly, I just close the door.

 

In other words don't put a lot of energy being mad at them and making assumptions about their assumptions about you. It's just not worth your time or energy to devote thought to them. Recycle the flyer and forget about it.

[Jean in Newcastle]

It wouldn't bother me. I figure it's informational. If I can use or want any of what they are offering, great. If not, great.

[Parrothead]

I suppose the thing that bothers me is I don't live in the inner city. Which is what Adopt-a-Block is all about .

 

From their website:

 

How do you change a city that has been influenced by every form of crime, drugs, violence and sexual perversion?

 

I live in a mostly middle class neighborhood. I'm guessing a good half of the people on my street (which is 2 blocks long) are elderly. If I had to label the folks in the subsidized apartments I'd say working poor.

 

There is no crime or violence. It definately isn't the red light district. The town is so small there isn't a red light district.

 

And drugs are not limited to any one type of area. Drug users run the gamut from the very poor to the very rich.

[Amy loves Bud]

I suppose the thing that bothers me is I don't live in the inner city.

 

[snip]

 

There is no crime or violence. It definately isn't the red light district. The town is so small there isn't a red light district.

 

And drugs are not limited to any one type of area. Drug users run the gamut from the very poor to the very rich.

 

I don't really understand this. It sounds like you are offended that they are suggesting that your crimefree neighborhood could have problems like drugs or alcohol, but then you say that abuse can occur at all socioeconomic levels?

 

If it were me, I'd look at it, and if none of it was useful to me I'd throw it away. I'd hope that if anyone needed it they would take advantage of the services offered. Maybe one of your neighbors has a hidden addiction and they will get needed help because of this.

 

They are trying to reach out in the best way they know how, I doubt they are trying to suggest anything about your neighborhood, they are just trying get the word out about offered services for anyone who would like to take advantage of them.

[Parrothead]

I don't really understand this. It sounds like you are offended that they are suggesting that your crimefree neighborhood could have problems like drugs or alcohol, but then you say that abuse can occur at all socioeconomic levels?

 

If it were me, I'd look at it, and if none of it was useful to me I'd throw it away. I'd hope that if anyone needed it they would take advantage of the services offered. Maybe one of your neighbors has a hidden addiction and they will get needed help because of this.

 

They are trying to reach out in the best way they know how, I doubt they are trying to suggest anything about your neighborhood, they are just trying get the word out about offered services for anyone who would like to take advantage of them.

I suppose. But hidden addiction or alcoholism is one thing. I'm not getting why, when there are worse areas in town (well, really only one), that this group choose my little two block area.

 

I suppose my OP was simply a vent.

 

It is a small town. There is a very small area that the police visit regularly. It is the typical area in any town - low income, known drug users, a call girl or two.

 

But these ladies from the Adopt a Block didn't go into that area to do their ministry. They picked the two block long street with about 8 kids total to save from crime, drugs, violence and sexual perversion. They really didn't go anywhere but their own back yard.

[Guest Dulcimeramy]

I once lived in a targeted neighborhood.

 

The "haves" coming to rescue the "have-nots" can be quite off-putting, even though their motives are probably good.

 

Miss Manners calls it "Annoying the Poor."

 

The free services are nice because many people are in need, and I don't want to suggest that people shouldn't extend themselves to others.

 

The extenders often make very rude assumptions about the extendees, that's all.

 

For example, they don't ask if you are Christians before they commence with the saving and rescuing. They assume you are not, for reasons I do not comprehend. I once called a church and asked them to stop offering my children candy as they stood in front of my house to lure them onto their church bus on Sunday mornings.

 

As I told the secretary, my children were standing in front of my house because they were waiting on the rest of the family to come out to get in the car....to go to church. So stop offering candy and telling them they need to come learn who Jesus is. They know who Jesus is, thanks.

 

The lady said, "You live there, and you already go to church? We didn't know of anyone in your neighborhood that did."

 

I then pointed out that no matter what I believed I would call it kidnapping if they did get my kids to come aboard their bus. She said they'd found that mothers in my neighborhood were happy to have a break from their kids. And they'd give the kids free breakfast and lunch at church.

 

:001_huh:

 

Or door-to-door proselytizing. They don't ask if you go to church. They begin with telling you why you should consider it, assuming that you never have.

 

Being helpful is a grand thing, but annoying the poor is not.

[Parrothead]

I once lived in a targeted neighborhood.

 

The "haves" coming to rescue the "have-nots" can be quite off-putting, even though their motives are probably good.

 

Miss Manners calls it "Annoying the Poor."

 

The free services are nice because many people are in need, and I don't want to suggest that people shouldn't extend themselves to others.

 

The extenders often make very rude assumptions about the extendees, that's all.

 

For example, they don't ask if you are Christians before they commence with the saving and rescuing. They assume you are not, for reasons I do not comprehend. I once called a church and asked them to stop offering my children candy as they stood in front of my house to lure them onto their church bus on Sunday mornings.

 

As I told the secretary, my children were standing in front of my house because they were waiting on the rest of the family to come out to get in the car....to go to church. So stop offering candy and telling them they need to come learn who Jesus is. They know who Jesus is, thanks.

 

The lady said, "You live there, and you already go to church? We didn't know of anyone in your neighborhood that did."

 

I then pointed out that no matter what I believed I would call it kidnapping if they did get my kids to come aboard their bus. She said they'd found that mothers in my neighborhood were happy to have a break from their kids. And they'd give the kids free breakfast and lunch at church.

 

:001_huh:

 

Or door-to-door proselytizing. They don't ask if you go to church. They begin with telling you why you should consider it, assuming that you never have.

 

Being helpful is a grand thing, but annoying the poor is not.

I suppose I wouldnt' mind if it if we were poor. I wouldn't mind it if the neighborhood was poor. One would almost expect it if that were the case. I know there isn't a family with children on this street that couldn't afford to take themselves down to the downtown area and buy their kids "goodies" from the candy story if they wanted their kids to have goodies.

Edited October 11, 2010 by Parrothead

[Stacia]

Perhaps they have chosen your block because they want to pat themselves on the back, but not really face an actual dire situation (areas w/ high drug abuse #s, gangs, etc...)? By getting your block, they can feel that they are 'doing good' w/out having to actually deal w/ the outright poor, the outright needy, the outright scary situations... kwim?

 

So, I can understand your ire at the situation. :glare:

 

Sometimes I think 'do-gooders' like that don't understand that their actions can come across as very offensive & rude. If the situation were reversed & some group came to their neighborhood to 'help out/clean up/haul their kids away/convert' others, perhaps they might understand that it's not always a welcome feeling to have strangers descending (& condescending) to do that....

[Jean in Newcastle]

Are you reacting to the actual organization? Because the flyer itself offers trick or treating (that doesn't seem tied to the poor or those on drugs), a ladies night out with a comedian (that doesn't seem to target call girls), a movie (that might annoy me if it were a movie with a set agenda but I'm not familiar with the movie so I don't know), a Recovery meeting (but as others have pointed out there are addictions in all demographics), goodies for kids (our Chamber of commerce brings around Christmas candy every December, I figure this is something like that but probably Halloween candy), a breakfast (again not targeted at the poor, addicted or criminal) and free clothing (and in today's economy people are struggling even in nice neighborhoods).

[Parrothead]

Perhaps they have chosen your block because they want to pat themselves on the back, but not really face an actual dire situation (areas w/ high drug abuse #s, gangs, etc...)? By getting your block, they can feel that they are 'doing good' w/out having to actually deal w/ the outright poor, the outright needy, the outright scary situations... kwim?

 

So, I can understand your ire at the situation. :glare:

 

Sometimes I think 'do-gooders' like that don't understand that their actions can come across as very offensive & rude. If the situation were reversed & some group came to their neighborhood to 'help out/clean up/haul their kids away/convert' others, perhaps they might understand that it's not always a welcome feeling to have strangers descending (& condescending) to do that....

Now, there is an idea.

 

Of course if I organized something like that it would backfire in my face. :D

 

I'm not against helping people who need help or providing free substance abuse services. I'm not all that fond of being told to go to the back door to get my free stuff. Or having the free movie entertainment being faith based. (I mean seriously. Did you check the movie link?) And if they really knew anything about the neighborhood they'd know there are no teens on the street to go to the movie.

[Danestress]

Maybe these are churches trying to draw closer to the communities in which they are actually located.

 

If the churches are across town, it does seem a bit off.

 

If they are trying to do outreach and get to know the physical neighbors of the church, that seems very sweet. If they are expecting lots of children and end up knocking on doors and finding elderly shut ins, than what a great opportunity for ministry that might be.

[Sebastian (a lady)]

I seem to remember several threads where "the church" is criticized for not being of service to the larger community. The flyer you have mentions several things that might be of interest to people who aren't familiar with the church(es).

The back door reference is likely intended to direct interested people to the part of the church where the clothing closet ministry is located, so that they don't feel like they are wandering around an unfamiliar building not knowing where they should go. I doubt that there is a "use the unwashed servants' entrance" intention to that direction.

 

If you don't find it helpful, toss it. But I don't see the purpose of getting angry that a group of people is offering information about their church or the activities and/or helping hand ministries they have planned.

[Amy loves Bud]

I suppose. But hidden addiction or alcoholism is one thing. I'm not getting why, when there are worse areas in town (well, really only one), that this group choose my little two block area.

 

I suppose my OP was simply a vent.

 

It is a small town. There is a very small area that the police visit regularly. It is the typical area in any town - low income, known drug users, a call girl or two.

 

But these ladies from the Adopt a Block didn't go into that area to do their ministry. They picked the two block long street with about 8 kids total to save from crime, drugs, violence and sexual perversion. They really didn't go anywhere but their own back yard.

 

It is absolutely your prerogative to vent and be bothered. I just want to point out that you don't really know their motives, so perhaps you could give them the benefit of the doubt until they give you a reason to do otherwise. Or not. I don't always do that, so I get it if you don't! :D

 

One other thing I want to mention, because I can see where it sounds bad but probably isn't, is the back door thing. Every church I have ever attended have front doors that lead to the foyer and sanctuary that are kept locked during the week. The offices where the church employees work usually have a separate entrance - usually in the back of the building. I think that's all there is to that statement. I could be wrong, but I'd be willing to bet that that is the case.

 

Have a good night!

[Guest Alte Veste Academy]

 

• We will be coming door to door on Saturday October 16 with goodies for the children. If you would like anything specific give us a call by Thursday, and we will bring it if we have it.

 

 

 

This is the part that is the most offensive to me. It is beyond presumptuous. I find the rest insinuating but tolerable.

 

I suppose I wouldnt' mind if it if we were poor. I wouldn't mind it if the neighborhood was poor. One would almost expect it if that were the case.

 

I've worked with the poor. I imagine it would actually bother you more. It's much harder to injure the pride of those who can roll their eyes in irritation and righteous indignation than it is to injure the pride of those often berating themselves daily for not being able to get ahead. :(

 

For what it's worth, I would be irritated too.

[RoughCollie]

The doorknob hanger, I would just toss if I wasn't interested in their offers.

 

But coming to my house on Saturday? That would bother me, especially if I didn't invite them or want them to come, which would be the case. I would think that is presumptuous and take umbrage at it.

 

I'm not too thrilled about do-gooders offering or trying to force their help upon me. If I need help, information, or candy from strangers, I'll ask for it.

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

The doorknob hanger, I would just toss if I wasn't interested in their offers.

 

But coming to my house on Saturday? That would bother me, especially if I didn't invite them or want them to come, which would be the case. I would think that is presumptuous and take umbrage at it.

 

I'm not too thrilled about do-gooders offering or trying to force their help upon me. If I need help, information, or candy from strangers, I'll ask for it.

 

:iagree:

[LisaMarie6]

Another perspective.

 

We (my family) are considered the working poor, but we are often the ones on the giving end.

 

For example, for Halloween my dh wants to go door to door giving away light bulbs. He thinks it would be nice to give something to people rather than ask for something. We are not taking the time to find out if people are poorer than us or make the same or more money. Our giving has no economic restrictions. We just want to show the love of Christ to our neighbors (without proselytizing).

 

Isn't it possible that these ladies aren't looking at how much you earn, but instead just want to do something kind for the neighborhood? I agree with another poster who said, assume the best intentions.