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Annoying experience with local HS group


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Ove the summer an email was sent out by a local HS group looking for volunteers for a 'Field Trip Committee'. I offered to help.

 

A few months go by with no word about it. Then, over the weekend I received an email from someone on the committee. The gist of the message was:

 

 

  • here is a list of who is on the committee,
  • we are trying to coordinate a meeting for this committee,
  • here is a list of dates and times that work for everyone else,
  • do any of these work for you?

I explained that I am a full-time student and am in class half a day, every day Monday thru Thursday. Between my classes, homeschooling, and the kids' activities, Monday thru Thursday are just busy, busy, busy for us. I am available any Friday or Saturday, any time. I even offered my home as a possible meeting location.

 

So last night I get a call from someone on this committee saying that nobody really wants to meet on a Friday because people like to have their Friday's open. She asked if I'd be willing to skip class one day so that they could have the meeting at a more convenient time for everyone else.

 

I said no, that I couldn't skip one of my classes to attend the meeting. Then she asked if I could do a meeting after 8 p.m. one night during the week (I can't, my dh just returned from deployment and he begins night classes next week). She said that they will probably have the meeting without me then and I should just think up some ideas an email them to her.

 

Just :glare: :001_huh: :glare:

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I can understand your frustration, but honestly, it sounds like she did her best to accomodate your schedule. From experience, I know as a leader of a group, it's hard to find times that work for everyone and sometimes you just have to take the majority and run with it. Everyone is so busy that it's almost impossible to find times that will suit everyone's schedule.

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Everyone is so busy that it's almost impossible to find times that will suit everyone's schedule.

 

But that's not what the response said. She was told that no one WANTS to meet on Friday because they like to keep their schedule OPEN. So, they are placing their desire to be free on Fridays against her desire to attend school, suggesting that she skip school so they don't have to skip their free time. Sounds to me like they really don't want to OP's help.

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i think i would send a message to the effect that i appreciated their attempts to accommodate my schedule, but as that was not working, and you would not be able to attend meetings at all this year that you thought it best for you to resign so they could find someone who was free when they were meeting.

 

you have enough on your plate without this, too.

ann

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But that's not what the response said. She was told that no one WANTS to meet on Friday because they like to keep their schedule OPEN. So, they are placing their desire to be free on Fridays against her desire to attend school, suggesting that she skip school so they don't have to skip their free time. Sounds to me like they really don't want to OP's help.

 

Yeah, it's ridiculous that they would ask her to skip a class so they could do nothing on Friday, lol!

Op, maybe they're doing you a favor. It would be fun to help, but if the others have already formed a united front in how they are going to work, it might be more of a headache than you thought.

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  • here is a list of who is on the committee,

  • we are trying to coordinate a meeting for this committee,

  • here is a list of dates and times that work for everyone else,

  • do any of these work for you?

 

 

Just :glare: :001_huh: :glare:

 

This alone, would have me declining to be on said committee. Obviously they have all communicated on this matter earlier, and didn't bother to include you sooner. I would let them know that I would not be helping this year. I wouldn't want to work w/ these people.

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i think i would send a message to the effect that i appreciated their attempts to accommodate my schedule, but as that was not working, and you would not be able to attend meetings at all this year that you thought it best for you to resign so they could find someone who was free when they were meeting.

 

you have enough on your plate without this, too.

ann

 

:iagree: that was my first thought, this could be a headache all year long.

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I'm sorry you are disappointed. I'm surprised it was suggested that you skip class. But I can understand the rest of the group not wanting to schedule this on Friday's. It sounds to me like you have a lot going on already without adding this in too. It seems to me that if you did go to these meeting you would not have time to study that day or get other things done at home you need to be doing. It would be tiring.

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This alone, would have me declining to be on said committee. Obviously they have all communicated on this matter earlier, and didn't bother to include you sooner. I would let them know that I would not be helping this year. I wouldn't want to work w/ these people.

 

:iagree:This was my thinking too! Take away everything else, and this would still bother me!

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I would respond something like this:

 

I had looked forward to serving in ---- capacity this year, but it sounds like my schedule is opposite to the schedules of others in the group and that it won't work out for me to be on the committee officially. Skipping class--for either dh or me--incurs a penalty (and explain what that is). I appreciate your attempts to include me, but it doesn't sound like a match.

 

Here are some suggestions that I have for field trips:

 

And leave it at that.

 

I both understand your feeling of being dissed by everyone else working out their free times first and then asking you and I also understand that free Friday nights and Saturdays would be difficult times for most people for regular meetings. Unless you can suggest an alternate time, I would just leave it.

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As I read along through your post, I thought, Wow! How cool for you to offer to help with a field trip committee even though your plate is pretty full as it is.

 

And then they suggested you "skip a class" to volunteer? :001_huh: (This is a homeschool group, right? You know, a parent-led group all about educating the the children?)

 

Hmmm.

 

I think you did your part. Were it me, the field trips would be organized sans Busy Me. May they have fun.

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As I read along through your post, I thought, Wow! How cool for you to offer to help with a field trip committee even though your plate is pretty full as it is.

 

...and I'm thinking, "Wow, she's nuts to take on one more thing under the circumstances." :001_smile: I'd bow out gracefully. It's perfectly reasonable for everyone else to want to keep their Fridays free...asking you to skip a class is questionable but I'd give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she's thinking you are simply too busy, but is uncomfortable coming right out and saying it. There are seasons in life. This isn't your season to volunteer. Nothing wrong with that.

 

Barb

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