Toddler waking 2-3x a night - HELP

[sewpeaceful]

Our 17mo dd has never been the *best* sleeper. We discovered around 6mo she has/had gastric reflux. We also figured out she is lactose intolerant. Once we figured these 2 things out, her sleep got better, but being a baby, she would still wake 1-2x a night. Around 1yr we realized she didn't *seem* to need the gastric reflux meds anymore and dropped those. Shortly after, our crazy life started: moving from our home to a rental for 2.5mo, to a live in hotel for 2.5 weeks and now into our new house a month and half ago. Amazingly, the minute we started sleeping in the new house, the kid started sleeping through the night (praise God!).

 

Well, good sleep lasted about 2-3 weeks and she started teething, the lactose intolerance seemed to get more sensitive (she used to be able to tolerate yogurt, white cheese, etc but not as much lately). So we dropped all lactose from her diet, keeping only with her lactaid milk. The night SCREAMING stopped. But she continues to wake 2-3 times a night with fussing. We go in, pick her up, comfort her and can put her back down within 30 seconds to 2 minutes and she is off to dreamland again until the next waking. If we leave her to settle herself, she goes into crying frantically and ends up with gas (again) and we ultimately have to go in, give her Mylicon drops, settle her and then put her down.

 

The only things that have changed in the past 2-3 weeks is her older sister started dance which means I am not home at night for bedtime 1 night a week, which shouldn't matter since her daddy has put her to bed since 1yo. In fact, she won't go down without him. In addition, we have been church shopping so she keeps getting left in new Sunday School rooms. And on Tuesday mornings, the kids and I attend CBS, a bible study, so she is in a nursery class with other toddlers and adults (1:1 ratio), but the same setting for 3 weeks now. These past 2-3 weeks are the first time she has ever been without us. (It didn't happen in TX at our old church because her naptime did not line up with service time - the kid had enough issue with sleep, no need to mess with naps :001_smile:).

 

We ALL need sleep. Leaving to cry = gas = we have to go in anyway. Settling = we are up 2-3x a night. If it is emotional, I am simply sad and don't know what to do about it - the family's activities can't stop because of a baby - but how can I help her security level while encouraging a little independence here? I am tired of giving her Mylicon, endless doses of ibuprofen and tylenol (record long teether by the way). I am concerned about her health and continuing meds. I am concerned about everyone's sleep - it is critical to physical and mental health for everyone involved.

 

PLEASE, does anyone have any kind, loving, and helpful suggestions out there?

 

:bigear:

[Pippen]

I've been there, done that with one of mine for years before we had all the pieces figured out. I'm sure you're all very tired.:grouphug:

 

One of my kids was very tactile and slept far better next to a warm body. It wasn't until she was sick with chills that we discovered that a lofty mummy sleeping bag had the same effect. A weighted blanket also worked well.

 

Sometimes poor sleep habits are habitual due to circumstances like ongoing illness, but sometimes it's a sign there's something else going on so it's a good idea to do some detective work. Developmentally does everything else seem on target--speech, crawling, walking, motor skills, etc? Is she overly sensitive to things like sounds, lights, food textures, etc?

 

When she sleeps, does she move around a lot? There are conditions like Restless Leg Syndrome that are extremely disruptive to sleep and impossible for a young child to alert parents to.

[MelanieM]

Well, I have never had a baby that slept through the night as young as 17 mos, so waking a couple times a night at that age is normal in my world! Just so you know that it doesn't have to mean that something is wrong.

 

It does sound like it might be a combination of the teething and a little separation anxiety, which is completely normal at that age regardless of what is happening. So the pain takes her out of sleep, then she's aware she's alone and starts to worry and is soothed again by your presense. If it's too difficult to get out of bed at night to go to her, is it possible to move her into a room with someone else for a while?

 

The anxiety could be aggravated a bit by her being left with strangers. Could you skip the new Sunday School rooms for a while (i.e. no leaving her in completely new environments without you) and see if it helps her security levels a bit?

 

Lots of good sleep vibes for you all! (And for us, too!)

[Pamela H in Texas]

I wonder if you could skip the picking her up part when you go in. And if you can catch it early enough that she's not actually UP too? Then you could rub/pat her while she's lying down still. I guess the hope would be that she would depend less and less on you to soothe her, esp since it's such a short time she needs any help at all.

 

BTW, like Melanie, I don't think it's odd at all. Though my dd slept through the night at a couple weeks old (however, didn't sleep nearly as much as the average infant, toddler, preschooler, etc), my ds15 didn't sleep through the night for YEARS.

[sewpeaceful]

It does sound like it might be a combination of the teething and a little separation anxiety, which is completely normal at that age regardless of what is happening. So the pain takes her out of sleep, then she's aware she's alone and starts to worry and is soothed again by your presense. If it's too difficult to get out of bed at night to go to her, is it possible to move her into a room with someone else for a while?

 

 

I agree with your post. Hence the I keep going in to sooth her. I cannot in good conscience keep dosing her with ibuprofen or tylenol. The ped checked her out the other day and there are no signs of illness other than teething (not an illness). ANY ideas on pain management? She tends to cut several teeth at a time and they take a LONG time to come in. Heck, we can't get her to eat much meat right now because it is too painful for her to chew (she tries and then grabs her mouth and fusses). She has eaten a lot of scrambled eggs lately. :D Okay, so pain management suggestions?

 

Other ideas?

[Teachin'Mine]

Personally I think you're doing the right thing to go to her and comfort her - letting her get so upset to be crying doesn't solve anything. But I wouldn't think that all that medication is a great idea, as you don't either. As you know, teething is always the worst at night.

 

Here's a homeopathic remedy that worked wonderfully well for us. We'd give her one a few minutes before bedtime and occasionally during the day if needed. It's been a while, so I don't remember if she needed another dose during the night, but if yours does, it certainly wouldn't hurt. There are no negative side effects and it's no different to them to take than plain water - but it works!

 

http://www.amazon.com/Boiron-Camilia-Teething-20-liquid/dp/B00016QTPS

 

Also, couldn't she be with you during Bible study?

 

ETA: Lower prices are available on Amazon - under $4 for 20 doses. : )

Edited September 29, 2010 by Teachin'Mine
To put the right link - Boiron, not essay writing lol

[sewpeaceful]

 

Also' date=' couldn't she be with you during Bible study?

[/quote']

 

Theoretically, yes. Honestly, I NEED that time. I have referenced it has been a TOUGH year on our family, as it has for many/most. Being in a new town, out in the country, I don't get breaks. That 2 hours is my only break. And she doesn't cry in there and it is the same ladies every week.

 

I will stop putting her in new sunday schools until we decide on a church once and for all.

 

I will check into the teething drops. Do you know if they are the same as the Highland Teething Tabs from Walmart?

 

THANK YOU!!!

 

I feel like I am starting to make new friends out there. What a great feeling! I appreciate you ladies being so supportive, sympathetic, and constructive in your suggestions. Thank you!

 

Anyone else with other suggestions or ideas?

[Plink]

May I suggest that you borrow the book Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child from the library. I found it very helpful in understanding "normal" sleep. It intentionally gives tips for all parenting styles, from attachment through cry-it-out, and describes how to help your little one to sleep better.

[TheCoffeeChick]

Both my kiddos didn't sleep through the night until about 3 years old, but I did find something with my younger that worked most nights for her - teething tablets by Hylands.

 

They are homeopathic, so no side effects. They might be similar to what Teachin'Mine suggested. We actually still use them when dd has had a really full day. She gets so worked up when she wakes up that we try really hard to prevent it by giving her some before bed - she also wakes with growing pains about 2 or 3 times a month and we use them then also.

 

The teething tablets work just about instantly for her. She stops crying within a minute or two and can fall right back to sleep. If we let her cry it out it can take hours for her to settle down. She is a very DRAMATIC little girl. ;)

 

Hylands also has a tablet called Calm's Forte for kids that we are going to try next - it claims to naturally help kids sleep who are prone to growning pains and nightmares.

 

:grouphug: Hope you find a solution.

Edited September 29, 2010 by BramFam
Add info

[mnemom]

You might want to check out Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution (I think she has a book by the same title geared towards toddlers, too). It is the most "gentle" of the infant sleep books.

 

My first dd (now 5) was probably one of the worst sleepers ever. She did not sleep through the night even once until after the age of two. My second (now 16 months) is a better sleeper but is still up at least once and sometimes three times if she is teething or sick.

 

For my first, I would go in and nurse or soothe her every time she woke. She learned to climb out of her crib at 18 months so we had her in a twin bed after that and sometimes I would just sleep in there with her.

 

Have you tried co-sleeping? With my younger dd, I put a twin mattress on the floor of my room and when she wakes I can quickly scoot down and lie down with her for a bit (or the rest of the night). Or you could put her on a mattress and lie next to the mattress, so that way you're not disturbing her but you can easily reach up and pat her back or whatever to soothe her. I found it is much less stressful on me to reach over than to have to get out of bed, walk to the other room, soothe, then try to fall back to sleep. Sleeping on the floor stinks but if it gets me through the tough sleep times it is worth it for a few weeks or months. Still follow safety precautions for co-sleeping if you decide to do something like that, even though your baby is older at this point.

 

I know how horrible sleep deprivation can be. With my second I tried to be calmer about it and just accept that I was going to be up a lot and I did not constantly try to "solve" her nightwaking and accepting it did make it more bearable. You will get through it!

[Mert]

You might find that removing all dairy from dd's diet might help. My ds had similar symptoms as your dd when he was younger, but he couldn't handle any dairy even in my diet until he was 2.5 or 3ish. We had to read labels and make sure nothing had whey in it or other dairy ingredients. It was a little trying at times, but it made such a difference in ds's temperament during the day and his sleep. Might not be an issue for your dd, but it might be worth it to take her completely off any dairy (even the smallest sneaky little bit) for 3 weeks and then do a taste test. Also, ds couldn't use the Hylands tablets b/c of the lactose.

 

We found great teething pain success with an amber teething necklace. http://www.balticamberteethingnecklace.com/

[Teachin'Mine]

Theoretically, yes. Honestly, I NEED that time. I have referenced it has been a TOUGH year on our family, as it has for many/most. Being in a new town, out in the country, I don't get breaks. That 2 hours is my only break. And she doesn't cry in there and it is the same ladies every week.

 

I will stop putting her in new sunday schools until we decide on a church once and for all.

 

I will check into the teething drops. Do you know if they are the same as the Highland Teething Tabs from Walmart?

 

THANK YOU!!!

 

I feel like I am starting to make new friends out there. What a great feeling! I appreciate you ladies being so supportive, sympathetic, and constructive in your suggestions. Thank you!

 

Anyone else with other suggestions or ideas?

 

By all means take those two hours! :)

 

I think the "active" ingredient is the same, but I think that the one I mentioned has high reviews on Amazon and some mentioned that it works better than the Highland tabs. Wouldn't hurt to try the ones from Walmart, and if they don't work, then try the other. It was instant results for my dd too. :)