Journey Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 could use some suggestions or advice. My 16 year old daughter got a job in a local pizza shop/resturant a few weeks ago. She works around 9 hours a week, could use more since she has a horse to help pay for. This is a child who I am very, very proud of. She's smart, very, very funny, pretty, confident and a perfectionist and herein lies the problem. She had to memorize the whole resturant menu, she even went so far as to write the items down on index cards to memorize them. Let me say that this place is not a very busy place and most of the delivery boys and "cooks" are known pot heads. The owners are from a different country and barely speak English and I wonder if they too smoke pot. Anyway, the one owner sat my daughter down tonight and said that the other owner is mad at her because she's not catching on quickly enough, and he was also upset for some other reasons and when my daughter asked what those reasons are the guy told her he didn't know. Well then, why are YOU talking to her, why isn't the other guy doing it? Anyway, he told her that she wasn't going to be fired but that she "had to pull her weight more". She thinks that one of the girls that she works with (who the other girls say is a jerk) is telling these bosses things about my daughter. I told her that she needs to go to the boss who is upset with her tomorrow when she goes in to work and talk to him and to stick up for herself. I also told her that if she wants to walk out after that then it is okay for her to do that. She doesn't enjoy going to work...she does ask alot of questions because she wants to make sure she's doing things the right way and apparently she's asking too many questions.....my boss is the type who tells me to ask questions, that I can never ask too many and that she'd rather me ask them than to do something wrong.....I just don't get it. So would this place rather have pot head delivery drivers and total snots at the front counter instead of a girl who takes pride in her job and only wants to do the right thing? The register has been coming up short and these owners told these kids that if it keeps happening that they would have to make up the money.....oh no, that is NOT going to happen. They need to give each employee a register number NOT have everyone dipping their paws into the register. By the way, my daughter's register has been coming up even these last few times after she went to them and told her that she wasn't comfortable paying for someone else's mistake. I am so angry with these owners. I just don't want her to take the easy way out but I also don't want people telling untruths behind her back. Thanks for letting me vent and if anyone has any advice or suggestions I would like to hear them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgehog Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 I'm sorry I don't have any great advice, just sympathy for your daughter; it sounds like a horrid situation to have to deal with. Maybe she could look about for another job??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barb_ Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 Red flags all over. She is an innocent it doesn't sound like they would have any problem having her take the fall for illegal activity. She may wind up arrested. She should quit yesterday before she is framed for something she hasn't done. Barb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gingersmom Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 Red flags all over. She is an innocent it doesn't sound like they would have any problem having her take the fall for illegal activity. She may wind up arrested. She should quit yesterday before she is framed for something she hasn't done. Barb :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 Quit now. Not worth it. The job I had when I was 17 had red flags all over it, but I ignored them until my boss grabbed me by the arm and shook me. If it doesn't feel right, it's not. Tara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldskool Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 Red flags all over. She is an innocent it doesn't sound like they would have any problem having her take the fall for illegal activity. She may wind up arrested. She should quit yesterday before she is framed for something she hasn't done. Barb :iagree: :iagree: Lesley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OrganicAnn Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 I've heard horrible things about young girls working places and people taking advantage of them. I would not let my daughter work somewhere like that. I've heard of managers what threaten to have kids arrested and not let them leave until they sign confessions that they stole money from the cash register. There was a local fast food place where they strip searched an underage girl. If you don't respect the managers, why would you let them have power or control over your daughter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anne in CA Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 I have made a career in the hospitality industry and I have to say that all of these things are unacceptable. Probably the owner is dealing drugs and that is why asking questions is not okay. Everything about this senario screams that this business is a cover up for a drug business. If this were my dd she would not enter the building again. My dh would pick up her last paycheck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brigitte Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 Red flags all over. She is an innocent it doesn't sound like they would have any problem having her take the fall for illegal activity. She may wind up arrested. She should quit yesterday before she is framed for something she hasn't done. Barb :iagree: Get her out of there ASAP. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Journey Posted September 22, 2010 Author Share Posted September 22, 2010 Organicann...they don't have power or control over my daughter, actually. She is free to walk out of there anytime she wants as I'm pretty sure they don't tie their employees up! Anyway, she is going to talk to the other owner tomorrow and fill out applications too (she just filled one out for another place down the road). I actually just told her that she doesn't have to go back there but her response was "well I need a job because I can't let you pay for my horse yourself." That's how responsible this child is. Since it's only 9 hours a week, I think I may let her stay until she finds something else...I hate to say this but with her looks, she can get a job at any one of these places...sad to say but true...when she started filling out apps a few weeks ago, she got two calls the same day the applications were filled out....but that is a whole 'nother' "problem" that she has to deal with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckens Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 I'm sorry that your daughter is in such a terrible situation as a teen worker. Get her out of there and reassure her that there ARE good bosses that will appreciate the intelligent, hardworking employee that she is. Her current employers will never find someone as good as she again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Journey Posted September 22, 2010 Author Share Posted September 22, 2010 Thank you so much. I know, I really do want her out of there but she wants to stay because of her horse. Oh my gosh, I don't know what to do...I will be praying....can you guys be praying too? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brigitte Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 Thank you so much. I know, I really do want her out of there but she wants to stay because of her horse. Oh my gosh, I don't know what to do...I will be praying....can you guys be praying too? Absolutely! Is there no job available besides this one for her? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OrganicAnn Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 The girl that was strip searched (told to undress down to her underwear) was in the managers office with the door unlocked. They don't need to tie them up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barb_ Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 Thank you so much. I know, I really do want her out of there but she wants to stay because of her horse. Oh my gosh, I don't know what to do...I will be praying....can you guys be praying too? Her safety trumps paying for the horse. If you feel this situation is unsafe, it would be wise to let her know that maturity and responsibility sometimes means deferring to experience. Reading your post made my scalp tingle. If she winds up spending the night in jail because the potheads and/or the b*tchy girl steal from the till and blame your daughter, the horse really won't mean so much anymore. Barb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imprimis Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 There is no way I would allow my daughter to go back to work (even one more time) at an establishment where I KNEW that kind of activity is taking place. Why chance it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 I think your plan is a good one: have her politely and directly approach the boss who is upset and tell him she hears there is a problem and that surprises her because she is working very diligently. And yes, I think it is fine to quit if things don't change. Some other restaurant owner will think he died and went to heaven with an employee like your dd. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cin Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 Thank you so much. I know, I really do want her out of there but she wants to stay because of her horse. Oh my gosh, I don't know what to do...I will be praying....can you guys be praying too? Your daughter is a teenager and probably inexperienced. The voices of experience, and mom's intuition should reign supreme. I would tell her flat out, she is not to go back and that I take care of the horse until she finds another job. Her safety should be supreme. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
parias1126 Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 (edited) Organicann...they don't have power or control over my daughter, actually. She is free to walk out of there anytime she wants as I'm pretty sure they don't tie their employees up! Anyway, she is going to talk to the other owner tomorrow and fill out applications too (she just filled one out for another place down the road). I actually just told her that she doesn't have to go back there but her response was "well I need a job because I can't let you pay for my horse yourself." That's how responsible this child is. Since it's only 9 hours a week, I think I may let her stay until she finds something else...I hate to say this but with her looks, she can get a job at any one of these places...sad to say but true...when she started filling out apps a few weeks ago, she got two calls the same day the applications were filled out....but that is a whole 'nother' "problem" that she has to deal with. I'm sorry for your daughters problems with her current job. I would NEVER allow my DD to work anywhere there are "known potheads". My DD 17 is having some issues with her current job as well (all of which we are trying to straighten out (most are money related though). The fact that your DD can get a job anywhere because of her looks is honestly not something to be bragging about. The whole reason my DD took the job she took is because it was the only job she was offered where everyone in the place was female! I was more comfortable with this considering every other place she interviewed at (including a very popular local chicken fast food place), even men in their 40s would comment on how beautiful she was. I dont want my teen DD to accept a job based on her looks! It's just creepy! Edited September 22, 2010 by parias1126 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoughCollie Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 Red flags all over. She is an innocent it doesn't sound like they would have any problem having her take the fall for illegal activity. She may wind up arrested. She should quit yesterday before she is framed for something she hasn't done. Barb :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 It is called "dump on the low man on the totem pole" and I got it in restaurant work as well as in residency. I would be busy applying to classier places. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LND1218 Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 I have seen a situation like this go bad really fast. She needs to quit NOW - seriously. She could get charged for something she didn't do. What if someone planted something in her stuff? The company you keep matters - working at place like that can bring trouble. A former coworker of dh's is in prison serving a 15 year sentence for something he didn't do - a coworker at a different place - after he left dh's employer - left drugs in his car. He knew the guy used, but it was a friend and and and.... 6 years later he is still sitting in jail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Journey Posted September 22, 2010 Author Share Posted September 22, 2010 One of you mentioned that I said my daughter could get a job anywhere because of her looks. Well, I NEVER said that, what I think I said was that because of her looks it is easier for her to get jobs....being good looking (and trust me, I would NOT know about this!) is as much a deterrent as being overweight (as my other daughter is). I want my children to get jobs based on their abilities, not on their looks...good or bad. Both of my girls (who are total opposites) are very hard workers, even to the point of it making their co-workers mad (hence why I think this one girl is lying about my daughter) and instead of getting a pat on the back for it they are getting blamed. She is going to talk to him tonight and if need be, she will walk right out the door. All of these things are good for teaching lessons and most of you are right, she does need to (and will be finding) a new job but I want her to be the adult here and talk to the owner and let him know that she is not going to let people walk all over her. I think she needs to do that to prove to herself that she isn't the problem. You would think, that with so many teenagers being the way they are these days that these people would be thankful to have a hardworking, HONEST person working for them. Wow....utterly amazing what some bosses these days are willing to hire. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LND1218 Posted September 23, 2010 Share Posted September 23, 2010 Organicann...they don't have power or control over my daughter, actually. She is free to walk out of there anytime she wants as I'm pretty sure they don't tie their employees up! Anyway, she is going to talk to the other owner tomorrow and fill out applications too (she just filled one out for another place down the road). I actually just told her that she doesn't have to go back there but her response was "well I need a job because I can't let you pay for my horse yourself." That's how responsible this child is. Since it's only 9 hours a week, I think I may let her stay until she finds something else...I hate to say this but with her looks, she can get a job at any one of these places...sad to say but true...when she started filling out apps a few weeks ago, she got two calls the same day the applications were filled out....but that is a whole 'nother' "problem" that she has to deal with. One of you mentioned that I said my daughter could get a job anywhere because of her looks. Well, I NEVER said that, what I think I said was that because of her looks it is easier for her to get jobs....being good looking (and trust me, I would NOT know about this!) is as much a deterrent as being overweight (as my other daughter is). I want my children to get jobs based on their abilities, not on their looks...good or bad. Both of my girls (who are total opposites) are very hard workers, even to the point of it making their co-workers mad (hence why I think this one girl is lying about my daughter) and instead of getting a pat on the back for it they are getting blamed. She is going to talk to him tonight and if need be, she will walk right out the door. All of these things are good for teaching lessons and most of you are right, she does need to (and will be finding) a new job but I want her to be the adult here and talk to the owner and let him know that she is not going to let people walk all over her. I think she needs to do that to prove to herself that she isn't the problem. You would think, that with so many teenagers being the way they are these days that these people would be thankful to have a hardworking, HONEST person working for them. Wow....utterly amazing what some bosses these days are willing to hire. Bold added - Personally, I am not sure exactly what you mean by these statements, but I can see where others interpreted it they way they did. That's not they way I took it, but it's easy to see how it was taken that way. Thanks for clarifying. :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dangermom Posted September 23, 2010 Share Posted September 23, 2010 Your daughter is a teenager and probably inexperienced. The voices of experience, and mom's intuition should reign supreme. I would tell her flat out, she is not to go back and that I take care of the horse until she finds another job. Her safety should be supreme.That's what I was going to say. She is too young to properly realize the problems with this situation, and it's your job to keep her out of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Sherry Posted September 23, 2010 Share Posted September 23, 2010 She's working in a situation where the other employees are known to be drug abusers and someone is stealing from the teal ? It's never a good thing to associate with people involved in drugs. Just being in their company can get you in trouble, such as them blaming you for things. I wouldn't let her go back. Really,there are people who have spent time in prison because of being framed for things by their drug friends. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TammyinTN Posted September 23, 2010 Share Posted September 23, 2010 Honestly...she would have to quit. To me this is a dangerous situation and she doesn't need to be there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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