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Is this enough? What am I doing wrong?


Robin5kids
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This is my 3rd year homeschooling my son (2nd grade) and something is not right. He just seems well, bored. We do spelling from a workbook, 1 page and then practice spelling the words orally,

Writing with Ease 1 lesson,

A vocab book, 1 page,

Well Trained mind language arts, 1 lesson

1 chapter of Story of The World, fill out our map for lesson, and maybe do a craft.

1 Lesson of Math

 

Science is done almost every day, he writes in a science journal and listens to stories and might do an experiment.

I am still looking in to getting some art and music.

 

So anyway, he is bored. He finishes by 1 or sooner and then he wonders around the house bored. He wants me to play games with him and entertain him. I have to do all his school work with him,because it is all adult lead and I have a 4 y/o to worry about too.

 

Last year my son played on his own. Now that he is older he is no longer interested in playing. Am I not having him do enough. Do I really have to schedule all his activities, so he never is bored.

 

I need to have some time to do things of my own, but he is at my side every minute complaining.

 

We live in the country and so there Are NO friends. No hsing groups. We can't afford any outside activities. I am getting frustrated.

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I posted almost the same thing 3 weeks or so ago. I got tips here and what I've done was

got some legos from Goodwill

went to Michael's and bought some cheap crafts

got him a pocket knife and let him whittle

got some more puzzles

made a list of 'educational' computer games he can play for an hour

weird little projects~ today he's taking the kernels off an ear of corn and making cornmeal between two rocks like the Aztecs

I got some art books/learn to draw books from the library

We set some goals together such as each day do 3 laps of the field, try to do 10 push ups and 5 pull ups, that sort of thing. Try to make 5 basketball baskets in a row, etc.

Mine seems to just need a direction and then he can go on his own. He just can't seem to get started.

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All our kids have a quiet time in their rooms for 2 hours after lunch everyday. If this were not so, I would be in a mental hospital.

 

I got this idea from Elisabeth Elliot's daughter when my older children were young. I've heard SWB say the same thing, and you can watch how it plays out at her house on youtube's Peacehill Press channel.

 

They can do whatever they want in there -- crafts, books on tape or music, toys, puzzles, whatever. And they look forward to this. Some of my older kids have learned calligraphy and drawing on their own during this time. One daughter wrote a novel. My younger boys generally build stuff while listening to books, and my older boys read.

 

After rest time today, 7yos plans to dig a hole to the other side of the world. This should keep him busy for awhile. :001_smile: He's hoping to find King Tut's father's tomb while he's at it. I haven't told him yet that we're a long way from Egypt. I'll tell him next week.

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I have a second grader and a 4 yr old and they would play together all day if I let them. They are B/G so it's not a gender thing. Cultivate the sibling relationship and say GO PLAY! Seriously, we do almost the exact same schoolwork as you do. Suggest more reading, but other than that I'd just tell him it's play time of chore time, he can choose;)

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I have a second grader and a 4 yr old and they would play together all day if I let them. They are B/G so it's not a gender thing. Cultivate the sibling relationship and say GO PLAY! Seriously, we do almost the exact same schoolwork as you do. Suggest more reading, but other than that I'd just tell him it's play time of chore time, he can choose;)

 

This works for us too My two oldest will play together endlessly but when they start to fight, it's chore time. We also have a mandatory rest time for 2 hours each day. The oldest two play quietly or read while the baby naps. It's for my own sanity more than anything else. I had a friend who continued to do this with her kids even when her oldest was a teenager.

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Yep, I get it. My 7 year old has decided he can not entertain himself.

 

We have quiet time for 2 hours each afternoon. He has two younger brothers to play with and a bike that he can ride. I have given him the things he can do around the house if he can not find something then I will find a chore. I have yet to give him a chore a reminder seems to be enough.

 

To me it seems to be an age thing, they think that all of the sudden they are to old to play - well that is their job and I make it my job to inform my children that play is there job along with learning one small step at a time how to be an adult.

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It looks like enough, like you have all your subjects covered.

 

I wish we could finish by 1 .. seriously.

 

I just made a post that our day is lasting till 1 thirty, uggh!

 

I notice my 7 y/o DS wanting constant entertainment. I think it is an age thing.

 

Of course now that we are in school it isn't as bad.

 

On break, it was awful as I cannot be his full time activities director.

 

Sigh..

 

The only thing I can think of is to provide him with a variety of things (which I am sure you already do)

 

Sorry not much help except to say that my son also gets VERY bored when nothing to do! I hear what you are saying.

 

I mean there is always Something to do .. but when he has not found something to engage himself in.

 

Loretta (Ben DS 7)

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"Chores" seem to work here. Ds is SO HAPPY to be doing something useful and helpful. I think kids this age need to feel like they are contributing in some tangible way. :) I don't call them chores, btw. If I notice that he is bored, I just pleasantly ask him, "Oh, ds! Could you please xyz? That would help me soooo much! Thank you!" It's not a punishment for being bored, but an opportunity to be helpful and active :)

 

ETA... Thanking him before the job is even done almost ALWAYS results in a cheerful, positive response from him. Of course, I thank him afterwards, too, with plenty of hugs.

Edited by Medieval Mom
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There's nothing wrong with "bored" as long as he's not getting in trouble. When my kids are at loose ends, I just leave them alone. I strongly feel that kids now days want someone else to schedule their days and don't learn to take the initiative to find something constructive to do with their time. That's an important skill. Develops self-starters. But, they won't learn to do that unless they're bored first and forced to "find something to do!"

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I can relate. Mine isn't 7 yet, he's only 4 but I see him being the same way when he is 7. I have school for him to do but he finishes it quickly and at his age I don't want to make him sit for more than an hour doing school. Not to mention with 4 other dc, he can't be the center of attention. I'm in the process of creating activity boxes for him so that I don't have to constantly direct him in some activity. Each box will have a different activity in it. Such as playdough with cookie cutters, a muffin tin with foam beads to sort and count, rice with funnels, containers and spoons, magnetic pattern shapes, etc. I like the idea of the corn and rocks...I'll have to add that one. Someone in my post mentioned letting him take apart an old copier; I don't have one but I do have an old toaster that I thought about letting him take apart. I also got a large jar and wrote the names of his toys on slips of paper and put them in the jar. If I just say go play he whines but if he draws a paper out of the jar he feels like its some kind of prize to get to play with that toy.:confused: Just in the last two days I made a mandatory 'go to your room time' and he fell asleep both times so I guess he needs that rest time.

 

Good luck...I'm right there with you!

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My thoughts are that sometimes a bored child doesn't want more to do, he wants connection. So I try to balance the times I provide entertainment with the times I provide presence--they are not the same thing, but they can look the same.

I find my girl can go off by herself if she has had my full, undistracted attention (doesn't have to be just her, but she has to be involved) for a while. We often work on something side-by-side, too.

So much of parenting is the ministry of presence.

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I just want to second the thought that being bored might be just fine. It may be a necessary void that WILL be filled -- and the more creatively the better. And what looks like boredom is sometimes an important decompression/processing time.

 

That having been said, if your son seems bored during school time, I'd recommend finding ways to liven it up. I'm reading The Minds of Boys by Gurian right now and am getting some great ideas to make our school time more boy friendly.

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