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Would you move to be closer to activities


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This is and has been an issue for our family for a while. We live in a wonderful little small town. Great place to raise kids. Has a new library, little league, and parks. But that's where it ends for us. Many people actually move to this town for the school system. If my kids were in school I'm sure there would be plenty for them to do with all of the sports and after school clubs. The problem for us is that everything I would like to do with the kids is 45 or more minutes away. Homeschool groups, tennis (which we are making the drive for), any type of club sport, grocery, shopping, jobs (which is becoming an issue now that the two oldest are reaching that age) are all 45 min away. Another issue is that as the kids are getting older, one has his license, they want to make that drive on their own. It's highway driving most of the way. Soooo, we have been considering a move. Just not sure if this is a grass is greener on the other side issue, or if it would really make a positive impact on our family. Any thoughts?

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Dh has changed his LinkedIn profile to reflect a willingness to move to the Portland area. Between the homeschool center, secular hs groups, and the overall crunchy and secular feel, I'd seriously consider moving across the country.

 

I mean, sure, I'd have to GO and really check it out first, but it's a consideration.

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This is and has been an issue for our family for a while. We live in a wonderful little small town. Great place to raise kids. Has a new library, little league, and parks. But that's where it ends for us. Many people actually move to this town for the school system. If my kids were in school I'm sure there would be plenty for them to do with all of the sports and after school clubs. The problem for us is that everything I would like to do with the kids is 45 or more minutes away. Homeschool groups, tennis (which we are making the drive for), any type of club sport, grocery, shopping, jobs (which is becoming an issue now that the two oldest are reaching that age) are all 45 min away. Another issue is that as the kids are getting older, one has his license, they want to make that drive on their own. It's highway driving most of the way. Soooo, we have been considering a move. Just not sure if this is a grass is greener on the other side issue, or if it would really make a positive impact on our family. Any thoughts?

 

Yes, it is a move we are considering and preparing to make within the next 12 months. That's all the help I can offer, but yes, we are going to do it.

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If I knew then what I know now...

We live in a small town like the one you describe. 45 minutes away is a larger town with homeschool opportunities, shopping, and activities. We opted not to move and for years made trips two or three times a month to take advantage of science classes and such.

And then my kids fell in love with musical theater. We're entering year five of driving to that 'nearby' town three days a week(better than last year when it was four days a week!), and nine out of ten days in a row when show week arrives. We should have moved...but we kept telling ourselves that the kids would grow tired of the program. They're now 16 and 18, and ALL of their friends live in that town...or even farther east.

 

Years ago I would have never considered moving to accommodate the kids. But I look back on what the older two could have done if we'd lived there and how much we've spent commuting so the younger two could pursue theater, and moving would have been a good choice for us.

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We'd like to. It's 30 minutes to every ball practice/ co-op/ etc. But we cannot because we would have to downsize our house to live there. We have 4 dc and really need the room we have now. Even taking into account the gas money, etc. we just cannot afford the same size house in the bigger town.

 

It's tough, though. Now we are considering sending oldest to Catholic high school in the city 30 minutes away. If we could afford to move I would but it means downsizing from 2500 sq ft to 1100 sq. ft. I'm just not willing to do that right now.

 

 

Marie

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Well, we are in kind of the opposite position. We are looking to move and decided to stay near the town with the most homeschool opportunities rather than moving further out, even though the the communities had more to offer real estate wise and such. I would seriously consider moving.

 

Some of my relatives live in small communities where the only job opportunities were 30 minutes or more away. One cousin even had to drive 45 minutes away into a different state to find a fast food job. Today my aunts and uncles talk about how they wished they had moved. Every year a child they knew was seriously injured making that drive back and forth to work. With all the wear and tear on vehicles they really didn't make any money working. Now, as aging adults my aunts and uncles have to drive that far for medical appointments and any hospital care.

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I think it really depends on what you consider important for your quality of life. I know that there are certain activities that my kids will want to participate in no matter where we live - swim team, dance classes, homeschool park days, etc. Since I hate (HATE!) driving and traffic, it would definitely be worth it for me to move closer. Right now we are living in a smaller place because we chose location over size. For me, the trade-off is worth it.

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I wish I knew how to quote because there have been so many things said that are exactly how I am feeling! It just really seems scary to move. But I don't want to end up staying here and regretting it. Like another poster I HATE to drive too. So, yes, it does impact my quality of life. And I suppose the kids too.

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I guess my answer is no. We live 45 minutes to an hour from gymnastics, which is every day. 45 minutes to baseball (I have to leave in about an hour from now!), and about the same to dance. It really is a trade off. My 17yo has a car and drives himself where he needs to go. My dh has businesses in several locations, so his drive can be anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour and a half.

 

Our place is on acreage with streams, a big barn, and trails through the woods. Home is peaceful. It is worth the driving to us. :001_smile:

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If I knew then what I know now...

We live in a small town like the one you describe. 45 minutes away is a larger town with homeschool opportunities, shopping, and activities. We opted not to move and for years made trips two or three times a month to take advantage of science classes and such.

And then my kids fell in love with musical theater. We're entering year five of driving to that 'nearby' town three days a week(better than last year when it was four days a week!), and nine out of ten days in a row when show week arrives. We should have moved...but we kept telling ourselves that the kids would grow tired of the program. They're now 16 and 18, and ALL of their friends live in that town...or even farther east.

 

Years ago I would have never considered moving to accommodate the kids. But I look back on what the older two could have done if we'd lived there and how much we've spent commuting so the younger two could pursue theater, and moving would have been a good choice for us.

 

:iagree:

But here I am still 1.5 hrs from town. I can't afford to buy or rent a house in town. Living so far away is a blessing for the freedom it offers young kids, but living so far away becomes a curse for the teen who wants to have more social interaction, do more things. The isolation of distance coupled with homeschooling pushed my sons out of the house and into town to live with friends before they were 16--not a good situation from a parent's perspective. Neither one of my sons want to raise a family so far from town. Whether they will home school their children is up for debate. Interestingly, none of the kids want us to sell the land and move to town. They still want to come home to hunt and fish.

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We're aiming to move to a smaller town that is an hour and ten from the capital city and forty mins south of a large rural city. There is public transport, though. By the time our kids are teens, and requiring more than a weekly, or at most twice weekly, trip north, they'll be old enough to catch the bus. There isn't much that is unavailable in the rural city to drive them down to the "big smoke" so I don't anticipate they will require anything there until they are in their senior years or maybe even uni aged. By then they'll probably want to move out anyway. But for us, a 40 min commute is quite reasonable. Where I grew up, it took 20mins to get to anywhere and when I was a teen, it was a 3km walk to from home to the train because the buses didn't run on weekends.

 

If I were you, I'd move. It sounds like you've reached that stage of life.

 

Rosie

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This is and has been an issue for our family for a while. We live in a wonderful little small town. Great place to raise kids. Has a new library, little league, and parks. But that's where it ends for us. Many people actually move to this town for the school system. If my kids were in school I'm sure there would be plenty for them to do with all of the sports and after school clubs. The problem for us is that everything I would like to do with the kids is 45 or more minutes away. Homeschool groups, tennis (which we are making the drive for), any type of club sport, grocery, shopping, jobs (which is becoming an issue now that the two oldest are reaching that age) are all 45 min away. Another issue is that as the kids are getting older, one has his license, they want to make that drive on their own. It's highway driving most of the way. Soooo, we have been considering a move. Just not sure if this is a grass is greener on the other side issue, or if it would really make a positive impact on our family. Any thoughts?

 

We did it and have NEVER regretted it. Of course, there were a lot more issues going on. We gained much more out of the move than JUST closer to activities although when I broached the idea to dh that's all I wanted was a small move to be closer to stuff but he could still commute to work. I thought it would be easier for him to drive the 45 min. to and from in a small car than it was with me in the gas guzzler with all the kids. He went for broke, found a new job and relocated hundreds of miles away. It is the BEST place for us and we love it!:D

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We made such a move two years ago and have never looked back. As my kids became teens, not participating in our small town's school system became very isolating. By the time we moved, we were driving to a city an hour away nearly five times a week for music opportunities for my 3 dd's.

 

The city is a much better fit for us. Now my dh drives the other direction for work several times a week. :001_huh:

 

Beth

Edited by Beth in OH
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