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DH Wants Cable, I Want To Canel


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I just think cable t.v. is making my life harder then it needs to be. I feel like I am fighting with the kids about it too much and the shows they want to watch, I am not happy with. Nick is on all the time it seems being that it is SO hot outside and we are not currently schooling. They are wanting to watch iCarly, Big Time Rush, Spongebob. I just think some of the things on these shows are too grown up for a 10 year old on down. I have spoken to DH and he does not want to even try canceling cable SO what I think I will do is lock ALL channels and will allow one show a day when all school work is done of course.

 

And then there are video games.

 

What happened to the days when kids just played outside???

 

Any suggestions?

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Institute no screen hours. I do between 8 a.m. - 4 p.m. on weekday. And even during the times that screen are ok, they have to give me a ticket for time which they get for reading or doing chores. I turn on the timer and then make them go do something else. Weekends are open as long as a parent is watching/playing too.

 

It's not easy to manage. But most good parenting isn't. We've been doing it for awhile and really they love to earn the tickets but they hardly ever cash them in!

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I suggest going cold turkey completely, at least during the school week. Yes there will be a lot of griping at first, I am sure, but you will at some point be absolutely amazed at the improvement in your home I think. We have pretty much eliminated all TV in our house, except a little sports on weekends. We have realized what a time sucker the TV was, even though it was only turned on after dd7 went to bed.

 

We still have standard cable, but are thinking about canceling (although our phone & internet are also cable, and canceling the TV part doesn't save us much $).

 

The content on TV is in general very bad, but I think what is worse is that it is such a massive waste of time, for kids and adults alike. Two books that made me very aware of this were "The Plug in Drug" and "Amusing Ourselves to Death" (both by different authors).

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We don't have cable, but we do have Netflix and ILL etc. I used to think about cable before Netflix. I don't see the point of a cable bill when everything I want is out there for a far lower cost.

 

However, if your dh wants cable, I don't think you should tell him he can't have it. There are things available on cable that are not available on Netflix, or so I have heard. lol ;)

 

It might be time to figure out together what you all need as far as media. Have a plan that works for everyone.

 

Remember too, that it will not be hot forever.

 

Kids played outside when it was hot, they also worked. It was over 100 today and 3 of mine were out quite a bit today. (The 4th may have been as well, I don't know as he is at college ....but I imagine he biked to campus as he always does since he has classes today). I don't know why so many people don't go out *at all* when it's hot. I get laying low in the hottest parts of the day, staying hydrated , and not running marathons, but i don't get kids *never* going out.

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I suggest going cold turkey completely, at least during the school week. Yes there will be a lot of griping at first, I am sure, but you will at some point be absolutely amazed at the improvement in your home I think. We have pretty much eliminated all TV in our house, except a little sports on weekends. We have realized what a time sucker the TV was, even though it was only turned on after dd7 went to bed.

 

We still have standard cable, but are thinking about canceling (although our phone & internet are also cable, and canceling the TV part doesn't save us much $).

 

The content on TV is in general very bad, but I think what is worse is that it is such a massive waste of time, for kids and adults alike. Two books that made me very aware of this were "The Plug in Drug" and "Amusing Ourselves to Death" (both by different authors).

 

I think I will do just this. No tv during the week and a little on the weekends. My 10 year old LOVES video games, but they are so violent, even the rated T games. Never will I allow rated M. I think I will allow only some screen time for both tv and games for the weekend.

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I think I will do just this. No tv during the week and a little on the weekends. My 10 year old LOVES video games, but they are so violent, even the rated T games. Never will I allow rated M. I think I will allow only some screen time for both tv and games for the weekend.

 

T is for "Teen" and I take that to mean above 13. That's not appropriate for a 10 year old. We only have "E" rated games and they seem to be ok.

 

Good luck with the deprogramming!!! :grouphug:

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Remember too, that it will not be hot forever.

 

Kids played outside when it was hot, they also worked. It was over 100 today and 3 of mine were out quite a bit today. (The 4th may have been as well, I don't know as he is at college ....but I imagine he biked to campus as he always does since he has classes today). I don't know why so many people don't go out *at all* when it's hot. I get laying low in the hottest parts of the day, staying hydrated , and not running marathons, but i don't get kids *never* going out.

 

I suppose I should have worded my post differently. They do go outside but it just seems like the majority of their time they would rather sit in front of the tv. I am always turning it off and having them go out but then they are back in shortly after. Just tried of the battle so I will just explain the change which they will HATE!

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T is for "Teen" and I take that to mean above 13. That's not appropriate for a 10 year old. We only have "E" rated games and they seem to be ok.

 

Good luck with the deprogramming!!! :grouphug:

 

I know, and it was always E that we would allow. But he became a HUGE spiderman fan and the game was T. We viewed it and it seemed okay. And the only reason we got it for him was because of how much he loved spiderman. But now, it has just gotten so messy that he think he can play any game that is T. I need to up my good parenting skills big time!

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I know, and it was always E that we would allow. But he became a HUGE spiderman fan and the game was T. We viewed it and it seemed okay. And the only reason we got it for him was because of how much he loved spiderman. But now, it has just gotten so messy that he think he can play any game that is T. I need to up my good parenting skills big time!

 

Oh no! I never thought of that they would start to think T is ok across the board. I think we have one T rating that is a Star Wars game but they are only allowed to play that with Daddy, so maybe it won't be confusing? So you aren't the only one! I just haven't had to make up for the mistake yet!

 

I will tell you the TV "detox" is no fun!!! Be prepared to stand your ground. They ALL ganged up on me the first couple days. I wanted to move out!

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Pretend that cable is canceled whenever DH isn't home. The tv simply stays off.

 

Institute certain hours for game playing and stick to those hours only. Use a timer.

 

Remove the offending games into a box hidden in the basement. (Until the kids are old enough for them.)

 

Give the kids advance notice of the changes. Today is Wednesday. I'd tell them that the changes will go in effect on Monday, and let them watch/play like normal until then.

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Cancel the cable!!! It was the smartest thing I ever did. No more discussing can we watch, when can we watch, I want to watch, please can we watch, blah blah blah.

 

My daughter has rediscovered her love of knitting and sewing and has already done 2 scarves and sewn two pairs of pajama pants.

 

Everyone is reading more and we have rediscovered our love of music.

 

I wish I had done it sooner.

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Cancel the cable!!! It was the smartest thing I ever did. No more discussing can we watch, when can we watch, I want to watch, please can we watch, blah blah blah.

 

My daughter has rediscovered her love of knitting and sewing and has already done 2 scarves and sewn two pairs of pajama pants.

 

Everyone is reading more and we have rediscovered our love of music.

 

I wish I had done it sooner.

 

I'd do it in a heartbeat. Problem is DH. He has his favorite shows and doesn't want to cancel.

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You should both get what you want. Let him get the cable, but let him know ahead of time that you'll be cutting it. :lol:

 

No seriously - you win. :D

 

Cut the cable and you'll be amazed how everyone adjusts - it just takes time. Be prepared for some really weird happenings though - like conversation, and game playing, and reading, and ...

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You should both get what you want. Let him get the cable' date=' but let him know ahead of time that you'll be cutting it. :lol:

[/quote']

 

I wish it worked that way, but it doesn't. It's a marriage and there has to be compromise. I have the same issues with my dh.

 

My dh works hard and is very active with the kids, and his one way to relax and chill is to watch some favorite shows on tv. He doesn't sit there like a lump, drinking a beer, while the rest of of work. He records things he would like to watch and then watches them while he does dishes or laundry (yes! seriously!).

 

While I would love to save the money on cable, it would be cruel to take his one goofy pleasure away from him.

 

That's why I suggested to the OP that she just pretend cable is cancelled whenever DH isn't home. Then she gets what she wants and he gets what he wants and the kids get (a bit) of what they want. It's win-win for everyone.

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I detest satellite TV, but dh needs it to get NFL Sunday Ticket. So, since he pays for it and watching football is the one thing he does just for himself, we have it. And he has every right to enjoy TV. However, the TV is not allowed on during school hours; no argument, it stays off. It is on for a few hours in the evening. Certain channels are locked out. There are shows we watch together as a family (Animal Planet, Discovery). Other than that, I look forward to the end of football season.

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I'd do it in a heartbeat. Problem is DH. He has his favorite shows and doesn't want to cancel.

 

Pretty much everything on TV can be gotten either online or on DVD. Why not suggest a trial of no cable/satellite? If he really misses it that much at the end of the trial, you can always re-subscribe.

 

We have been cable/satellite free for 5 of the past 6 years (2 years w/o, 1 year with, then 3 years w/o).

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I wish it worked that way, but it doesn't. It's a marriage and there has to be compromise. I have the same issues with my dh.

 

My dh works hard and is very active with the kids, and his one way to relax and chill is to watch some favorite shows on tv. He doesn't sit there like a lump, drinking a beer, while the rest of of work. He records things he would like to watch and then watches them while he does dishes or laundry (yes! seriously!).

 

While I would love to save the money on cable, it would be cruel to take his one goofy pleasure away from him.

 

That's why I suggested to the OP that she just pretend cable is cancelled whenever DH isn't home. Then she gets what she wants and he gets what he wants and the kids get (a bit) of what they want. It's win-win for everyone.

 

We cut the cable years ago, and it was a mutual decision. Both of us really enjoyed watching TV at night after our dd was in bed, but we both gave that up for the better good. For us, the programming available was objectionable and even when we were watching something family friendly, like Wheel of Fortune or Jeopardy, as an example, the commercials that came on and trailers for movies were not acceptable to us. It was hard at the beginning, but after a month or so, it wasn't missed. We still buy DVD's and borrow them from the library, so we're not totally deprived of movies and all, but we can control what's watched, and when, a whole lot easier than when it was coming in the cable. And yes, I know that there is some really good programming too. :)

 

Some things in a marriage do require compromise, and other things you just do because it's the right thing to do for your family. Each family and each decision is different. I was just giving my opinion in a weird way since I seem to have a weird sense of humor. :tongue_smilie:

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My dh works hard and is very active with the kids, and his one way to relax and chill is to watch some favorite shows on tv. He doesn't sit there like a lump, drinking a beer, while the rest of of work. He records things he would like to watch and then watches them while he does dishes or laundry (yes! seriously!).

 

While I would love to save the money on cable, it would be cruel to take his one goofy pleasure away from him.

 

How is it cruel to have him watch the same show on DVD instead from the DVR?

 

My DH also likes to watch TV to relax. He has said that he only rarely misses cable/satellite.

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I'd do it in a heartbeat. Problem is DH. He has his favorite shows and doesn't want to cancel.

 

No need to cancel your husband's subscription. Just tell the kids, "No."

 

Make a new rule, effective immediately: No television or video games during the daytime hours. A little tv while Mom is cooking dinner will be allowed. Some video game play on the weekends will be allowed.

No complaining or arguing, or the evening shows and the video games on the weekends will be off the table for the next two weeks.

 

We have plenty of cable channels because I like the History channel while I fold laundry, and my husband watches the sports channels at the end of the day.

Just because it's there doesn't mean it has to be used. Everyone around here knows that the television isn't something we use during the daytime hours.

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Yep, no screen time during certain hours. We fell into a bad habit several years ago after a move and I was pregnant. TV was a babysitter (even if it was only PBS.) I saw a big change in attitudes when they had too much, so we did a cold-turkey for a week and a moratorium during school hours. Can't even be on.

 

:iagree: I cut off all tv and internet use (except for school and email) last Friday. Changes in attitude have been drastic! Even dh came home last night and commented that everyone seems happier. I will be allowing screen time as of tomorrow, but it will be very limited, and only during certain hours, and when all school work has been completed. They will also have to choose which screen they want that day- internet, or tv. :001_smile:

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How is it cruel to have him watch the same show on DVD instead from the DVR?

 

My DH also likes to watch TV to relax. He has said that he only rarely misses cable/satellite.

 

 

Well, he likes to watch lots of science shows and weather shows. (He has a master's of science and particularly loves to study the weather.) Are those available on DVD? Can you get copies of shows like "Ice Road Truckers" on DVD?

 

He also likes to record old movies to keep forever. He's recorded every single Doctor Who episode available--there are over 700 (yes Seven Hundred) episodes. The old ones run about $20-$30 per episode. Recording them from satellite has been cheaper than buying all those episodes. :tongue_smilie:

 

The satellite is also bundled with the phone and internet, so when you think of the phone, internet and odd old movies/tv shows that he likes (that are expensive to buy outright), I think it's a better deal.

 

Personally, I could probably just get rid of tv entirely, but dh enjoys his shows and I see nothing wrong with it.

Sure, I'd love to save the money. Sure, the kids ask to watch (since it's there.) But we just tell them no. :)

Edited by Garga
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I have wanted the same thing, but I realize that it's not fair to expect my dh to give up something he truly enjoys (football!). We actually love Food Network and watch a lot of the challenge type shows together as a family. We had our own version of "Chopped" with some best friends this summer.

 

I realize I just need to buckle down and make managing it a priority. I don't let them watch during school hours, but I'm not good at managing it after.

 

Find what amount you are willing to let the kids watch, then stick to it (preaching to myself here, too!).

 

I'm actually thinking about looking at the tv listing and having the kids choose for the week what they want to watch. I realize it might not be the same amount of time each day.

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Never heard of the show before, but apparently one can get seasons 1-4 on DVD. ;) Netflix has seasons 1-3.

 

Weather Channel stuff, I'm not sure.

 

I love it that you checked for me!!

 

We've been married for 18 years and we've had this conversation for about 17 of them. I want to just stop paying for tv...he wants to keep it.

 

At least he's watching pretty benign shows or sciency stuff.

 

After 17 years of going round and round with him...I'm starting to understand his point of view. Now, if he was watching all the trash out there, I might fight harder. But a few reality shows about truck drivers and his science shows and Doctor Who episodes aren't worth fighting over.

 

Thanks for trying to help! I've been trying to get him to switch to NetFlicks for the past couple of months, but he keeps waffling. I've just about given up (but don't tell him, yet!)

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