Please tell me this is going to work out...

[Maddysmom26]

My almost 10 yr old, asked me last night if she could return to PS for 6th grade.. because she feels like shes going to miss all her old friends...

 

 

UGG...sigh...:confused:. We havent even started are first yr of HS'ing and she was on board with me from way before I made the decision and super excited when I did decide to let her HS.

 

Im having such anxiety about it.. Im starting to feel guilty.. even though I know Im making the right decision for us for the time being.

I wouldnt have a problem with her going to a better PS, its just we arent in the situation now for that. I do not want her going back to the district we live in, there are many reasons for that.

 

Please tell me this will all work out.. Im starting to second guess myself.

Im praying that in a few years financially we will be in a better place for her to attend a nice high school, if she so chooses. ( after homeschooling she may just change her mind right?? ) shes only going into 5th grade.. so we have time.

[Corraleno]

My almost 10 yr old, asked me last night if she could return to PS for 6th grade.. because she feels like shes going to miss all her old friends...

I think ALL kids feel that way when they transition from PS or private school to homeschool. My DD was quite the social butterfly and missed her school friends a lot when she first came home, so I made sure to set up a few playdates with her old school chums, and also enrolled her in activities where she would make new friends. She does Brownies, Tae Kwon Do, and group music lessons, and she's made new friends in each of those places. She has a new "best friend," with whom she has a standing playdate on Saturday afternoons. She's perfectly happy now (last year was her first year homeschooling) and she has no desire to return to school. As long as you provide your DD with plenty of opportunities to make new friends, she'll be fine. :001_smile:

 

Jackie

[Jean in Newcastle]

It will work out. Do you have e-mail addresses or phone numbers for her friends? Try to schedule a weekend playdate soon so that she can see them.

[The Girls' Mom]

I pulled my oldest dd out of PS kicking and screaming (not literally, but there were lots of tears and she did NOT want to HS.)

 

2.5 years later, she is very OK with it. Would she go back if I offered? Yep. But she doesn't resent it any longer, she has made new friends, and has stayed in touch with her closest PS friends. She's even hinted around that she may HS her own kids someday. Give it time. Show her the positive things about it, and always point out the things that she's doing that she couldn't if she were in PS. My dd now loves to rub it in a little (good naturedly) to her PS friends that she's doing such and such while they were 'stuck' at school.

 

I also think it helped that I didn't give her the option to change my mind. It was a final decision, and that was that. There wasn't the constant wondering if she could talk me into letting her go back.

[Catwoman]

My almost 10 yr old, asked me last night if she could return to PS for 6th grade.. because she feels like shes going to miss all her old friends...

 

...shes only going into 5th grade.. so we have time.

 

Don't worry! :) You've got an entire school year before you really need to be concerned about this, so treat it as a non-issue right now, and be non-committal with your dd.

 

Enjoy your school year, and remember that kids change their minds all the time, so you have no idea how she will feel about ps by next year ...or next month, or next week, or tomorrow, or after lunch... ;)

 

Cat

Edited August 20, 2010 by Catwoman
typos, as usual!

[....]

Can you do a co-op? Or take a class or two? My 2 oldest kids are taking classes at an enrichment center and they were glowing - they were so excited. Would something like that help your daughter's transition?

[Maddysmom26]

Thanks everyone! Im sure it will all work out.. I didnt make a big issue of it when she mentioned it to me, I simply said, well you have plenty of friends, and you have emails of your PS friends and you can call them and get together with them anytime. (We hadnt all summer because it just gets busy and really she didnt mention any of them)

anyway.. she has wanted to homeschool for awhile so I think it will be fine.. I think maybe because its getting so close to back to school,, it made her realize shes not going & the change is almost here...

 

we do not have any co-ops that I know of around. But she does have lots of cousins and other friends aside from school. And I reminded her that she can still play sports with her old friends.

Shes such a social bug that Im sure its going to be an adjustment, but Im going to try and get her into some activities at the local gym, so she can meet new friends there too.

 

Its just one of those things, that she mentioned to me last night and like I said , I didnt make an issue of it to her, but I took it to bed with me and then carried it on my mind all day today.. so I needed to get it out.

Im sure its normal transition for both of us to feel a little funny until we get adjusted. excited, nervous.. exctited ...nervous.. ;)

 

This forum has been such a great support for me! thanks everyone!:D

[hornblower]

In my house, at that age, it's not the kid's decision. Whether child is on board or not is only a minor concern, really. There are tons of kids who don't want to be going to school & whose parents shove them out the door because it's what they decided is right (or more likely it's all they know :))

 

My point is, you're the adult, make the decisions & don't start second guessing yourself with her. Tell her it will be all right & make it so.

[Margo out of lurking]

Please tell me this will all work out.. Im starting to second guess myself.

Im praying that in a few years financially we will be in a better place for her to attend a nice high school, if she so chooses. ( after homeschooling she may just change her mind right?? ) shes only going into 5th grade.. so we have time.

 

It's an anxious time--for both of you! It is scary. Of course she's worried she's going to miss her friends.

 

Take a deep breath. Instead of starting school when everyone else does, do something fun outside of the house with your dd, whether it's going on a picnic lunch, going out to lunch, spending the day away from home. Whatever it is, make it special.

 

I don't know your whole situation, but I would be sure to focus on the benefits of hsing for the next several months--not in words, but in your actions. Celebrate a pajama day, make pizza for lunch, do schoolwork outside, etc. Spend time together and enjoy the fact that your relationship WILL change as you spend more time with each other. Embrace it! The time you invest in this may be more important that what she's doing academically for the next few months.

 

I'd also encourage you to find some kind of homeschool group in your area. It will be nice for her to have the opportunity to build relationships with hs kids as she makes that tough transition from ps to hs. If you don't find a good match with a group the first time around, keep looking.

 

Really, the hardest part about this is often the transition. She's going from what she knows, and she'll miss it. She can imagine what everyone else is doing, but she doesn't know how things will go for her yet. You can make it easier, and this will be a great year for both of you.

 

:D

[NanceXToo]

I think ALL kids feel that way when they transition from PS or private school to homeschool. My DD was quite the social butterfly and missed her school friends a lot when she first came home, so I made sure to set up a few playdates with her old school chums, and also enrolled her in activities where she would make new friends. She does Brownies, Tae Kwon Do, and group music lessons, and she's made new friends in each of those places. She has a new "best friend," with whom she has a standing playdate on Saturday afternoons. She's perfectly happy now (last year was her first year homeschooling) and she has no desire to return to school. As long as you provide your DD with plenty of opportunities to make new friends, she'll be fine. :001_smile:

 

Jackie

 

Yep! My daughter went through a few months of "I like homeschooling, but I miss my friends." But it hasn't come up in a long time. It's a normal transitional thing but she will be fine, and you have nothing to feel guilty about.

 

Let her call her friends and invite them for playdates, make sure she's in some sort of situation where she can be around other kids, and just give her a little time to get used to the new changes.

 

My daughter was always a very sociable kid. We joined a homeschool group and go on plenty of field trips. My daughter is in Girl Scouts and we signed up for the homeschool bowling league and we do plenty of summer activities and we did 4H for a while and so on. This fall she'll be going back to Girl Scouts, she'll either be attending gymnastics or martial arts classes, we go to library programs, in the winter/spring we may join the homeschool bowling league again, and we'll continue group get togethers and field trips. After school, she plays with neighborhood friends. She's happy!