need parenting advice

[stylistmommy]

ok so i have a 8 year old dd amd a 9 year old ds who refuse to do chores because daddy doesnt do any which is ture when he was active duty air force he worked long shifts and i did everything now that he is out and mind you doing nothing except watiting on his school to start i now have to reteach the children daily chores (responcibilitys) and they act like its destrying there life takes 3 hours to put up laundry takes an hr to sweep the bathroom im at my end i need help with all 3 "children"

 

 

 

any and all advice would be helpful

i have tried bribing charts and yelling i need new ideas

[AlaskaGrownFamily]

I'd remove the fun stuff from their lives until the work was done, pleasantly and promptly.

[Chris in VA]

Yep, me, too.

 

And, gently OP, please use capitals and punctuation. It makes it easier to read your posts and offer advice.

[coffeegal]

Chores happen right before mealtime, especially lunch and breakfast. Each child may eat once their specific chores are done to your satisfaction. Also start small, say each child makes their bed + 1 extra small chore. Once everyone is into the routine, you can add additional chores. :001_smile:

[Jean in Newcastle]

At the ages of your children (and even at the age of my 13 year old) chores are much more fun if everyone does them together. Put on some fun music, and fold laundry together. My kids love it when we fold and put away laundry because we have laundry elves in our house. These elves love to grab the folded clothes and sneak them away to put away in the drawers. I've tried elf alarms (loud siren noises when I "notice" the missing clothes), elf traps (a hand under the folded t-shirt to catch them with), elf bombs (a colorful sock under the folded item that "blows up" with a loud boom (of course made by me!) Chores are fun!

 

For sweeping the bathroom floor,, make sure they know how - I know, I know, it sounds like a no-brainer but my kids needed to be taught how to go in the corners, how to make sure you get the entire floor and how to make sure you get the stuff into the dust pan. Once they know how, then make it fun. Get out the timer and play "Beat the timer"!

[Michelle in AL]

I would also explain that daddy's chore is going to work. He does work, just not inside the home. I'm sure you've probably already pointed that out though.

[Catherine]

Then, work on your "loving but firm" attitude. I just approach them very insistent, I don't yell or bribe or hit, I simply don't allow them to do ANYTHING until they've done what I ask. Prepare them for the new expectations with a conversation, let them ask questions, head off their possible excuses, explain you'll all get on best if they work quickly and cheerfully. And don't make them be perfect! Praise their first efforts. Recognize effort. The, we work on doing it with a good attitude. It's a long road.

[Pamela H in Texas]

"You may ______ (eat, play, watch tv, read, whatever) once your chores are done." State it in the positive and be friendly. They don't need you to nag or remind them. Just make sure you make it happen. If you give in, THEY lose (as well as you).

[Dawn in OH]

I'd remove the fun stuff from their lives until the work was done, pleasantly and promptly.

 

:iagree:

[learninearnin]

Are they getting an allowance? We use Dave Ramsey's idea about paying the kids commissions for their 'jobs' - no work, no pay. They also have other chores they have to do that they don't get paid for, it's just part of being a family. This has been very effective with our 2 that area your kids' ages. It also gives us the opportunity to teach them about tithing, saving, and how to budget for the items they want to buy. Just a thought!

 

http://www.daveramsey.com/article/top-3-kids-and-money-qa/lifeandmoney_kidsandmoney?atid=davesays

[mom31257]

:iagree:

:iagree: No work = no fun!