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Kids say the darndest things...


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Yesterday I was driving with my 2 daughters in the back seat playing Barbies. Here's a snippet of their conversation:

 

DD5 - Why did my prince leave? Doesn't he want me?

DD8 - You have to go to the man's cave. There are lots of princes there! That's where they keep them.

 

:lol: I have no idea where they come up with these things.

 

Have your kids said anything funny lately?

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LOL! That is too cute! I love how kids say the funniest things!

 

DD3 is always saying something funny. Here's a few of hers:

 

She had the hiccups. I said "Boo, where did you get those hiccups?"

"Wal-Mart", she replied.

 

During the winter time she refused to wear a jacket. She informed me that she has fur, like a tapir (which actually does not have too much fur LOL), and that she didn't need a jacket. A few weeks later, we were out and about and she was cold....she asked for her jacket. She exclaimed "The puma ate my fur and now I'm cold!!" :D What in the world? LOL!

 

DD6 (when she was 5) walked up to me with her chest puffed out and said "See my boobies?" My sister was standing there with me and said "No, I don't see anything." DDthen5 replied with "Well, that's why I need to exercise them.....so they'll get bigger."

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Mine (5yo dd) told me last week that I had the biggest bottom she'd ever seen.

 

:glare:

 

(really, I seriously doubt that....I wear a size ten and we know lots of people bigger than me)

 

My son told me once that I looked like the people on The Biggest Loser. Ouch! I know how much I weigh and how much they weigh and I'm about half their weight when they start.

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DD is always saying something off the wall. A few days ago while we were visiting the grandparents I was talking to my dad about how early we'd have to get up once school started and such, and DD spoke up and said "Mommy, I can't get up that early, don't you know I'm not-turnal?"

 

You're WHAT? "You know, not-turnal. I sleep all day and stay up all night".

 

LOL. Nocturnal. I have no idea where she learned this word, but she sure has a good grasp on it!

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Yesterday 5yo dd had a hard time pulling her tshirt over her head. She was rather put out by it and exclaimed, "Mom my head is giant and this shirt is tiny!" Her head is average-sized and the shirt is her regular size. I just laughed and laughed at her indignation. She finally added, "Mom, you can stop fake-laughing now." :lol:

 

Cinder

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My 2 yo was being a little naughty the other day. I told him to stop, and he didn't. Now, at our house, one of the derailing techniques for littles is to stop and ask them who's the boss. So, I ask him.

He says, "Dad."

I say, "yes, and who else?"

He says, "Mom. But it not matter!"

 

 

The little turkey! :lol:

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My youngest dd was begging to listen to Radio Disney in the car. I turned it on and of course, the music was wildly inappropriate for a 7 yo so I quickly changed the music to an 80s station. It happened to be a song she had heard remade recently ( I can't remember what song it was) and she was shocked. "Mom, I thought you only listened to old-timey music. I didn't know you liked good stuff!"

 

Yup, that's me, the old-timey mom.

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Listening to NPR on the way home from the gym early one morning I heard a woman being interviewed. Her viewpoint was so conspiracy-theory out there I couldn't take her seriously. Sitting at breakfast a few minutes after getting home I said to dh, "I heard the stupidest woman on NPR this morning..." My ds (then 6) interrupted me, "Mommy we don't say stupid.":glare:. I tried again, "I heard the most brainless woman..." Again ds says, "Mom, what does brainless mean?"

me: "It means she doesn't have a brain."

ds: "But she has to have a brain or her body wouldn't work, she wouldn't be alive."

At that point ds the younger (then 3) looks up calmly from his plate and says, "She should go see the wizard." and takes another bite of breakfast.

:lol:

 

I never did get to finish my story to dh......:)

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I hesitate to share this because it's quite a bit TMI, but just 20 minutes ago, PDG prayed the blessing for our food at lunchtime. This is almost verbatim to what she said:

 

"Dear Lord, thank you for this lunch. And please help Mommy's p*eri*d to be done soon so she won't be grumpy anymore. Help it to be done faster than any other lady's. Amen."

 

This had me laughing immediately...I guess her prayer was answered. I have been really grumpy (again) today!

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That's rich. :lol:

 

 

I hesitate to share this because it's quite a bit TMI, but just 20 minutes ago, PDG prayed the blessing for our food at lunchtime. This is almost verbatim to what she said:

 

"Dear Lord, thank you for this lunch. And please help Mommy's p*eri*d to be done soon so she won't be grumpy anymore. Help it to be done faster than any other lady's. Amen."

 

This had me laughing immediately...I guess her prayer was answered. I have been really grumpy (again) today!

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LOL! That is too cute! I love how kids say the funniest things!

 

DD3 is always saying something funny. Here's a few of hers:

 

She had the hiccups. I said "Boo, where did you get those hiccups?"

"Wal-Mart", she replied.

 

During the winter time she refused to wear a jacket. She informed me that she has fur, like a tapir (which actually does not have too much fur LOL), and that she didn't need a jacket. A few weeks later, we were out and about and she was cold....she asked for her jacket. She exclaimed "The puma ate my fur and now I'm cold!!" :D What in the world? LOL!

 

DD6 (when she was 5) walked up to me with her chest puffed out and said "See my boobies?" My sister was standing there with me and said "No, I don't see anything." DDthen5 replied with "Well, that's why I need to exercise them.....so they'll get bigger."

 

That last quote is something my girls would say...! Hey, I just visited your lovely blog :)

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Yesterday my youngest DD and my DS were running in circles around the kitchen island for some reason. My son ran into the cabinet and fell out in the floor. Immediately he said, "See?! You should have told me to stop doing that!"

 

:glare:

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I was teaching a kid once that really struggled. One day he was getting every answer right on new material. He asked why and I said, "You have great instinct."

 

Poor kid! He flew out of his chair and yelled at me, "Mrs. Laura, I DO NOT STINK!!! My aunt makes me take a bath every night so the smell will go away!"

-----------

My grandmother died in May. When we were at the cemetary my ds 10 realized that a backhoe was used to dig the grave. He has been allowed to dig on my dad's small backhoe with my dad's close supervision in the past so he looked at my dad and asked, "Did you pay someone to dig that hole? You know I would have done it for you and great grandma for free if you had asked me."

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Yesterday my youngest DD and my DS were running in circles around the kitchen island for some reason. My son ran into the cabinet and fell out in the floor. Immediately he said, "See?! You should have told me to stop doing that!"

 

:glare:

 

:lol: This reminds me of another story about a friend. She was standing on a chair decorating for something at church when she fell off and immediately knew she had broken something. While at the emergency room, her ds 6 calmly says, "Mom, that's why we don't stand in chairs."

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I had my 2 grandsons overnight Monday as it was their parents wedding anniversary. I was snuggling with the almost 4 yr old watching Gaither on TV. It was a show featuring the Bill and Gloria including old footage from the 70's of them singing Because He Lives and He Touched Me. I was explaining to my grandson that they wrote those songs and had been singing them a very long time. He said: They should quit singing and go to bed when it gets dark out!

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Yesterday my youngest DD and my DS were running in circles around the kitchen island for some reason. My son ran into the cabinet and fell out in the floor. Immediately he said, "See?! You should have told me to stop doing that!"

 

:glare:

 

:lol: Love it!

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My 4 y/o announced to a room full of people at my nephew's birthday gathering this evening:

 

"I'm a c*ock!"

 

To which everyone started laughing, which only encouraged him to repeat it over and over. And over.

 

This stemmed from us eating lunch in a chinese restaurant a few days ago and my 9 y/o reading that paper menu that tells you what year you are... like year of the dragon, the ox, etc. I guess you already know what year my son is.

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