What to do with a 6 1/2yr old who needs naps but does not always take them?

[Mom2J112903]

So my son is in his room screaming-this happens 99% of the nights that he does not take a nap. The other 1% of nights is when we have been on the go from morning to night.

 

Yes, he does get the opportunity to nap-he does not always take them. He is sent to his room, where there are no toys, for approx 2hrs.

 

When he does not nap, we start our bedtime routine at 6p vs 7p on these days.

 

He will sleep until between 6a and 7a.

 

I despise my child crying like this, but he is doing everything in his power to stay awake. I do not know what to do anymore.

[5LittleMonkeys]

:grouphug: I assume he is screaming because he was put to bed earlier than usual? How long does the screaming keep going? If it continues for longer than 15 minutes I would say there needs to be some consequences. Going to bed even earlier the next night or taking away a privilege or favorite toy. I know what my reaction would be if my almost 7 yr. old screamed for even a couple of minutes, but I know that probably isn't the most popular view on this board so I won't suggest it.;)

[Jean in Newcastle]

I give them Calms Forte. It is a homeopathic remedy that relaxes you and helps you to sleep and/or to calm down. It works for both of my kids.

[Mom2J112903]

No, he is screaming because he wants his Daddy home and he is *so* tired that he knows his crying will keep him awake. Daddy is in retail managment, so his shifts can be "open" and he be home around 4p or he can "close" and not be home until around 830p. Daddy has had this job for *many* years, so it is not new to him.

 

Ignoring him is the best thing to do-after I of course have layed with him for 5 minutes or so explaining things to him. He sometimes goes on like this for 20 minutes, other times only about 5 minutes.

 

This is not blood-curlding screaming or "bratty" screaming-this is overly tired and being sad that Daddy is not home type of crying. Trust me, J knows to cut the bratty as things do get taken away.

[Mom2J112903]

I give them Calms Forte. It is a homeopathic remedy that relaxes you and helps you to sleep and/or to calm down. It works for both of my kids.

 

He already gets 3mg of melatonin on nights he has not napped.

[SailorMom]

Well - both of my sons no longer took naps once they were 4. They would NEVER go to bed if they had a nap. Your son sounds like he only occasionally needs some extra sleep - and two hours is a long time to sit in his room if he is awake. If he doesn't fall asleep - then that is two hours he is doing nothing - not burning energy... which could also be a reason he doesn't go to bed well that night.

Every child is different, abd I certainly can't tell you your son has outgrown naps (although none of the children I have been around took naps after about the age of 5) but maybe it is time to change to a 7:30 or 8:00 pm bedtime with no naps - and be very consistent.

As for wanting Dad home - well - he is old enough to be told that crying won't change anything, and that even when dad get's home, if it is after his bedtime - he will not be seeing his dad. Sounds harsh - but this is from a military wife - so I can relate to horrible schedules and sons missing their fathers.

Just my $.02 - again, I am only coming at this from my own experience, and I will be the first to say that ALL kids are different.

[Jean in Newcastle]

He already gets 3mg of melatonin on nights he has not napped.

 

You can do the calms forte in addition to the melatonin. It is not a hormone like the melatonin is and so it will not affect him in the same way. But it may help to calm him down. It is pretty main stream. Most pharmacies and even our grocery store has it in the baby aisle or the sleep aide aisle. Of course health food stores will have it too. It is homeopathic so it is minute amounts of "active ingredient" that triggers your body into responding.

[dirty ethel rackham]

Rescue Remedy works great in our house. It is not about sleep, but about calm in an emotional or stressful situation. I use it on my kids and on me.

[hornblower]

I'd drop the naps. Push bedtime to 8:30. On eves when dad is late, push to 9. Let him sleep in the morning. My kids needed 11h at that age so I'd let him sleep till 8:30. One of the joys of homeschooling for my family is that we can start when we want to in the morning.

 

Kids who are over tired can be kept calm with gentle quiet activities, baking something together, listening to an audio book, a bath. Or I'd go for a drive or a walk together. Then have some quality, quiet talking & calm play time with daddy right when daddy gets home, for 20-30 mins.

[Forget-Me-Not]

At six and a half your kid still needs a nap? Maybe I'm in the minority, but my longest napper stopped around 3.

 

If he usually falls asleep within 20-30 minutes of being put to bed, I'd say that's probably about the right bedtime. But if he's up for hours after you put him down, then maybe it's time to adjust bedtime back a little.

 

What about playing some soothing music or an audiobook to distract him at bedtime?

[Whereneverever]

Wow, he seems awful old to be napping! What about having him read or listen to books in bed?

[Julie in Austin]

Wow!

 

Mine all stopped napping before 3, and I think that is typical.

 

We allow ours to fall asleep as their bodies dictate, but they need to stay in their rooms doing something quiet, like listening to an audio book or playing with Legos.

[5LittleMonkeys]

Ignoring him is the best thing to do-after I of course have layed with him for 5 minutes or so explaining things to him. He sometimes goes on like this for 20 minutes, other times only about 5 minutes.

Sounds like you have your answer. If you aren't wanting to go the route of issuing consequences for his behavior then ignoring it is your only other option. I'm sorry you have to listen to it though. I know how hard it is to ignore. I'm not doubting that he is sad about not seeing daddy but he probably is trying to test you to see if you will eventually give in and let him stay up. At least that is the way my ds4 behaves. He is smart enough to use his sadness to his advantage. Hope you get some peace soon.:001_smile:

 

Edited to add that I agree with the others about maybe you need to give up the 2 hours of being in his room everyday. 2 hours of running around instead of building up pent up energy might make putting him to bed at 6 a breeze.

Edited August 4, 2010 by 5LittleMonkeys

[Mom2J112903]

Oh gosh if we kept him up until 8 or later, who wants him the next day? He wakes, no matter what time he goes to bed, by 7a at the latest. Even on the nights we have attempted to let him stay up he will be asleep by 830p out here on the couch. Up by 7a the next morning, quite a *lovely* child to deal with the next day. Even on New Year's Eve last year he somehow kept his little body awake until almost midnight-guess who was awake at 630a New Year's Day.

 

J has social anxiety and SPD-naps/rest time is his way of "destressing" from his enviroment. So, yes, he *needs* that time and 2hrs may seem like a lot to some, but on days he naps, he goes into his bed and is out like a light within 15minutes and sleeps for almost 2hrs.

 

For some reason he has down right screamed out of pure anxiety when you mention music in his room. From the day he was born until shortly before his 6th birthday there had been music in his room.

 

We do read bedtime stories, right now we are reading Stuart Little.

 

Bedtime, unless he has not slept, starts at 7p and he is out like a light by 730/745p-just depends on how long he stays in the shower. He likes long, warm, showers, just like Mommy :) When he was in Catholic school, every day-even over school breaks/summer, bedtime started at 6p-and we still had nights like this because he was simply overwhelmed.

 

Life is overwhelming for J, as stated above, so, yes, he needs his naps and bedtime, when he is not rested, everything just comes crashing down so to speak.

 

His pedi and OT are not stressed about the naps-he needs them, we homeschool, it works for us.

[Mom2J112903]

When we go to the pool, and we are there from 1p-5p, we still have nights like this. So, um, yes, the giving up of the 2hrs in turn for active time, doesn't work. I should also add we are at the pool, on average, 4 days a week. He also has OT twice/week, an ASL class once/week and will start gymnastics once/week-he is a very busy little man.

[Whereneverever]

Oh gosh if we kept him up until 8 or later, who wants him the next day? He wakes, no matter what time he goes to bed, by 7a at the latest. Even on the nights we have attempted to let him stay up he will be asleep by 830p out here on the couch. Up by 7a the next morning, quite a *lovely* child to deal with the next day. Even on New Year's Eve last year he somehow kept his little body awake until almost midnight-guess who was awake at 630a New Year's Day.

 

J has social anxiety and SPD-naps/rest time is his way of "destressing" from his enviroment. So, yes, he *needs* that time and 2hrs may seem like a lot to some, but on days he naps, he goes into his bed and is out like a light within 15minutes and sleeps for almost 2hrs.

 

For some reason he has down right screamed out of pure anxiety when you mention music in his room. From the day he was born until shortly before his 6th birthday there had been music in his room.

 

We do read bedtime stories, right now we are reading Stuart Little.

 

Bedtime, unless he has not slept, starts at 7p and he is out like a light by 730/745p-just depends on how long he stays in the shower. He likes long, warm, showers, just like Mommy :) When he was in Catholic school, every day-even over school breaks/summer, bedtime started at 6p-and we still had nights like this because he was simply overwhelmed.

 

Life is overwhelming for J, as stated above, so, yes, he needs his naps and bedtime, when he is not rested, everything just comes crashing down so to speak.

 

His pedi and OT are not stressed about the naps-he needs them, we homeschool, it works for us.

 

I'm not knocking the quiet afternoon time- I have my 6 year old do 2 hours of it every afternoon. She rarely sleeps, though.

Do you have a really good bedtime routine? Is his melatonin dose too high?

I understand needing that downtime- not trying to sound like I didn't!

[SailorMom]

I took melatonin for a long time - and 3mg was a lot for me.... but I also woke up with horrific headaches. Like - hangover-bad headaches. This stuff is not benign. Also - I would sleep for 3 hours and then be wide awake....

Anyway - just a thought - but maybe the melatonin needs dropped?

[EKS]

I honestly have never heard of a 6yo who needs daily naps. My older son napped until he was 4yo and that was crazy old. My younger one dropped naps at 2yo.

 

Frankly, if he needs melatonin to sleep, maybe the nap thing needs to go.

[Mom2J112903]

We have played around with his melation-anything much lower it is like giving him water, anything higher and he acts drugged the next morning.

 

Our bedtime routine has been the same for 6 1/2yrs. Meds (he is on many for allergies, asthma and GERD), shower/bath, brush teeth, books, bed. The only thing that has changed is there is no more bottles, but those have been gone since he was 11 months of age. We always sing him his sunshine song, give hugs and luvs and shut the door.

 

I know a few other children, when given the chance, they still sleep-some are older than J. Shoot, you give me a chance to take a nap, and I will still. I do feel much better after a nap, I can imagine what it does to a little man that is overwhelmed with life at times. OT is helping and while I love the quite time, I know that in time, it will decrease and the naps will be gone. We will keep quite time, not as long, but um, Momma needs her time alone ;)

 

I honestly think a bedtime of 9p or later for a 6 yr old is too late-no matter what time they wake. DH and I are in bed by 10p-that only gives us an hour together. Yes, I want more than an hour with my DH alone. If that makes me a terrible Mother, than so be it. I love my son and he is my life, but it is nice to have some time with DH-alone.

 

I would have thought tonight would have went better-we walked out of the house at 9a and did not walk back in until after 2p. He had OT, his first of two allergy injections, went to Target, had lunch out, went to Aldi's and then to another local grocery store. He was practically asleep in the car on the way home, when we got home however, things changed. I heard thunder off in the distance and then the weather alarm started going off. That is all it took, J got scared and could not fall asleep. He needed that nap today, but could not relax enough to do so.

 

He was asleep fairly quickly tonight, once he let himself relax, that is all it took.

[Mom2J112903]

He doesn't get the Melatonin every night-only on nights like this. It helps him fall asleep.

 

The Calm's Forte has a milk ingrediant in it therefore we could not use it before since he had a milk allergy. We will definatly get some now as he just needs something to help calm his body down so he can sleep.

 

He sleeps like a baby once he is asleep. Always has :) He wakes up *very* rested and since his allergy testing and getting new allergy meds and allergy shots, he is resting even more peacefully.

 

Average age of children no longer napping is, per our pedi, is when they enter K-and even many K children still need naps. Hence why all day K has rest/nap time still.

[SailorMom]

I agree - 9pm is too late... but 7:30 or 8:00 with no naps is reasonable for his age - overwhelmed or not.

You're not a bad mom - and no one is suggesting that:grouphug:

Just trying to offer suggestions.

[Mom2J112903]

I agree - 9pm is too late... but 7:30 or 8:00 with no naps is reasonable for his age - overwhelmed or not.

You're not a bad mom - and no one is suggesting that:grouphug:

Just trying to offer suggestions.

 

 

Thank you. I feel that some are saying "what do you mean you *allow* your 6 yr old to nap?!" Suggestions are always welcome and I appreciate the ones I have recieved. I can't stand seeing him like this as I know what he is going thru, I just never had a Mother to help me thru it. I vowed never to have J go thru this.

 

I would love to get him starting our routine at 7p every night, no matter what, it is just not possible right now. I worry about him since he wakes with the birds that putting him to bed any later (starting at 8p) he will not get the sleep he needs.

 

I always wanted a child that slept-in, I didn't get one and neither did my sister. Her daughter is the same way, no matter what time you put the girl down, she is up with the sun-just like her Momma was. We just don't make babies that know what it means to sleep in, lol.

[Dobela]

So you think fatigue is causing the melt downs? I would ask the OT for something like a weighted blanket or vest to see if that would help him at nap time. It may be that on the days he doesn't sleep he needs that extra deep pressure to help him relax and center himself. When I was teaching we would use it with kids at naptime fairly regularly. If it works, you could even make one of your own fairly inexpensively. Does he maybe need a darker room or something like a fan blowing to help him refocus and relax? My son has some sensory issues and while he doesn't need the weighted blanket he cannot go to sleep unless there is air moving in his room and he has been very snugly tucket in.

 

My son also will not sleep with music on. He will however fall asleep whenever we play books on disc that we have checked out from the library. I guess it works because to really 'hear' the story, he has to be really still and quiet.

 

My son was very attached to his dad at that age as well. That is just natural. When dh was out of town or having to work late they still had a bedtime routine where dh would call and they would pray together over the phone and just spend a few seconds chatting. The time would vary some depending on what dh was doing at work, but it really meant a lot to ds. If your dh can't be available by phone, maybe he could be the voice recording some stories or something for ds to listen to as he is going to sleep. He gradually outgrew his need for this but it was a lifesaver at the time.

 

You may have to experiment some. My ds is now 10 and sometimeswhen he is over tired or overwhelmed sensory wise we still have to go lay down with him at night to get him to sleep. He needs that close physical touch and comfort to relax then.

 

If you think it is a behavior choice, then you will have to think of consequences for his behavior. If he is chosing to scream - penalties, whatever would be a deterrant like extra chores later. If he choses to be quiet-rewards of some sort he can work towards. Say __ days of no screaming then he can go eat a $1 sundae with his dad on his day off. Or whatever works for you.

[Mom2J112903]

Yes, fatigue. It is almost 90 outside still and my child has a rather heavy blanket on him. He does like the deep pressure. A bull in a china shop-that is my child. He LOVES weighted blankets but I have not been able to find one, inexpensive, and large enough for him. He wraps himself up like a catepillar in a caccoon. I am not a very crafty person, I have to handsew everything. I did make him a weighted blanket of sorts, but he *hated* it, not sure why, most likely because I was not able to get the weight distrubuted equally.

 

His room is *very* dark, we have black out curtains behind his me-maw made denim backed construction vehicle curtains.

 

We did find a bed tent (it really looks like a tent!) that encompssess the bed. I will order it before the end of the week :)

 

The fan is on at night due to the excessive heat outside and if we ran the AC any lower than it is right now we couldn't afford the utility bill. Our poor AC runs almost constant as is right now, at 82. It is miserable outside.

 

I really like the recording stories idea! I honestly do not know if J would listen to them or not though. Worth a shot!

 

We call Daddy every night, most nights J just lays there and lets Daddy speak and J doesn't say a word. Just knowing that Daddy is there is a comfort. Daddy works very close to home, so we do visit him often, which helps of course.

 

Those $1 sundaes are great "bribes" aren't they? ;)

[Sherry in OH]

Have Daddy record himself reading a book or singing a few songs. Hearing Daddy's voice may enable your son to relax enough to sleep.

[Paintedlady]

I can't fathom a 6 yr old actually napping. :001_huh: Both of mine refused to nap after about age 2, no matter how hard I tried. Sorry, other than put him to bed earlier, I don't know what to tell you. :grouphug:

[Lightly Salted]

I lie down with mine on those occasions - any excuse for a nap ;)

[LibraryLover]

Why not just do quiet time... quiet toys, books, simple art supplies, a calm movie, audio books etc? I don't know any 6.5 yr olds who nap on a regular basis. That is totally out of my realm of experiece.

[2squared]

My 6.5yo goest through periods where he definitely needs a nap, and often during those times, he will fall asleep on his own. He sounds a lot like the OP's son. He is a sensory seeker, and his body is always in overdrive. He gets overwhelmed when we are on the go. He loves to wrap himself in a blanket, and he needs his downtime.

 

Honestly, my ds would be overwhelmed being in so many activities and on the go as much as you are. That would cause meltdowns, not the napping. If we have been quite busy during the day (which can be only a few hours out of the house), my ds is prone to meltdowns. If we are busy for a couple days in a row, I know he will struggle. So....are you sure it's the naps that help him or could it be that he is more rested and relaxed just because he is at home and not dealing with the sensory issues that are found when you are out & about?

 

FWIW, my almost 4yo is required to nap once or twice a week still. When his behavior ramps up, I know his body is needing extra rest. I require my 8yo to nap when her behavior is needing it to. Naps are good things in our house!

[LibraryLover]

I lie down with mine on those occasions - any excuse for a nap ;)

 

 

LOL Yes! I was going to suggest that....but I know some moms like their quiet time without kids. Me, I like quiet time, however I can get it. If a snuggle or nap on my bed will do it, great. An audio book or peaceful movie is also right up my alley. I can't tell you how many times I feel asleep to Winnie the Pooh and The Blustery Day, or The Snowman. Loved it. Miss it.

[LibraryLover]

His tantrums could also be from lack of protein. He could be hungry. He could be having blood sugar crashes.

[Dobela]

Yes, fatigue. It is almost 90 outside still and my child has a rather heavy blanket on him. He does like the deep pressure. A bull in a china shop-that is my child. He LOVES weighted blankets but I have not been able to find one, inexpensive, and large enough for him. He wraps himself up like a catepillar in a caccoon. I am not a very crafty person, I have to handsew everything. I did make him a weighted blanket of sorts, but he *hated* it, not sure why, most likely because I was not able to get the weight distrubuted equally.

 

Those $1 sundaes are great "bribes" aren't they? ;)

 

Sounds like you are trying lots of good things. One of the best weighted blankets I saw someone make was just an ordinary thin comforter/blanket with huge metal washers sewn on at regular intervals (4 inches maybe??) It took the mom forever to make it because each one was handsewn on securely. To make sure her son wouldn't pick one off and to make it easier to wash she then covered it with a sheet and sewed squares (criscrossing straight lines) on it to make it look quilted. Maybe MeMaw can do something like that to help you?

 

I also just remembered that sometimes my son sleeps best on top of a beanbag with a heavy blanket on him. It looks very uncomfortable to me but it works.

 

Would running his fan during nap time help him as well? I understand heat - our high today was 107 with a heat index of 113. We can't keep the house cool at all making us all miserable.

 

Have you ever looked into fragrances? I don't know much about them but a mom on another list swears by using essential oils with one of her kids. I can't remember what she uses but she swears by them.

 

Maybe you can look up some sensory room ideas that work for children with severe sensory sensitivity. Our last OT has a sensory room with slow moving Christmas lights, a bubble machine, and other things that really would calm down some of the kids she worked with.

 

:grouphug:

[MelanieM]

The other day I was having a conversation with a health practitioner that I hold in high esteem and she commented that melatonin can have serious side effects for children. She specifically mentioned hyperactivity and reliance on the substance after prolonged use. I don't really know much about this (it wasn't the primary subject of the conversation, and wasn't directly relevant to me) but thought I would pass that along in case it's something you'd like to look into.

 

No advice to offer that hasn't already been posted, but thought I'd share this about melatonin in case it's helpful and somehow related to your struggles. Sending lots of well-rested vibes your way!

[SilverMoon]

Bach's Rescue Remedy works pretty well for my kids in that situation, and doesn't have dairy. :)

 

One thing that worked for my little ds when he was so tired he couldn't get to sleep, was laying behind him and hugging him tightly. He'd push against me at first, then fall into it and be out cold within a couple minutes.

 

For what it's worth, my kids, SN or NT, have taken daily naps until 5-7 years old. I can't imagine a 3yo not napping. :001_huh: Today my 6.5yo ds declared he was also going to take a nap when his sisters were put to bed for their daily nap (they're 2.5 and nearly 5). He grabbed a book and did just that. He hasn't napped regularly since he was 5, but obviously that booster is still needed at times. :001_smile: My husband remembers teachers scolding him for falling asleep in school all the way through first grade. My oldest two kids napped through their first grade years too. *shrug*

[Whereneverever]

His tantrums could also be from lack of protein. He could be hungry. He could be having blood sugar crashes.

:iagree: Good call!

[fairfarmhand]

My 5 yr old only occasionally needs a nap and I know what you mean about being up with the birds, well rested or not. My kids don't really sleep in, they just wake up and act like ogres all day. But each child is SO different. If he needs the quiet time, he needs it.

 

What about a back rub? Would that help him unwind?

 

And I had one child that would just cry to unwind at the end of the day. I figured out that rocking, laying down with her etc, just prolonged bedtime and made her more tired and stressed, but if I put her in the bed, let her cry for five minutes, she'd be out like a light.

[Mom2J112903]

This is J to a "T" I can go to the pool, OT and his allergy shot, no problem-add in *anything* else, watch out. I am really nervous about this fall when he will have gymnastics and soccer the same night.

 

Even on days that we are home, if he does not nap, he is just overwhelmed.

 

My 6.5yo goest through periods where he definitely needs a nap, and often during those times, he will fall asleep on his own. He sounds a lot like the OP's son. He is a sensory seeker, and his body is always in overdrive. He gets overwhelmed when we are on the go. He loves to wrap himself in a blanket, and he needs his downtime.

 

Honestly, my ds would be overwhelmed being in so many activities and on the go as much as you are. That would cause meltdowns, not the napping. If we have been quite busy during the day (which can be only a few hours out of the house), my ds is prone to meltdowns. If we are busy for a couple days in a row, I know he will struggle. So....are you sure it's the naps that help him or could it be that he is more rested and relaxed just because he is at home and not dealing with the sensory issues that are found when you are out & about?

 

FWIW, my almost 4yo is required to nap once or twice a week still. When his behavior ramps up, I know his body is needing extra rest. I require my 8yo to nap when her behavior is needing it to. Naps are good things in our house!

 

Naps are a *very* good thing in our house as well.

 

I lie down with mine on those occasions - any excuse for a nap ;)

 

I do lay with him, but I can't and want him to find the ways to comfort himself. I can't be with him when he is a grown adult and married, now can I? ;)

 

His tantrums could also be from lack of protein. He could be hungry. He could be having blood sugar crashes.

 

Blood sugars are fine, they are checked regularly as we thought in the past that this was the problem. Nope, just a sensory kiddo.

 

Sounds like you are trying lots of good things. One of the best weighted blankets I saw someone make was just an ordinary thin comforter/blanket with huge metal washers sewn on at regular intervals (4 inches maybe??) It took the mom forever to make it because each one was handsewn on securely. To make sure her son wouldn't pick one off and to make it easier to wash she then covered it with a sheet and sewed squares (criscrossing straight lines) on it to make it look quilted. Maybe MeMaw can do something like that to help you?

 

I also just remembered that sometimes my son sleeps best on top of a beanbag with a heavy blanket on him. It looks very uncomfortable to me but it works.

 

Would running his fan during nap time help him as well? I understand heat - our high today was 107 with a heat index of 113. We can't keep the house cool at all making us all miserable.

 

Have you ever looked into fragrances? I don't know much about them but a mom on another list swears by using essential oils with one of her kids. I can't remember what she uses but she swears by them.

 

Maybe you can look up some sensory room ideas that work for children with severe sensory sensitivity. Our last OT has a sensory room with slow moving Christmas lights, a bubble machine, and other things that really would calm down some of the kids she worked with.

 

:grouphug:

 

J adores his beanbag and more than once I have found him snuggled up on it with a pretty heavy blanket. I actually have done this myself when he is not around, it is pretty cozy :)

 

I will definatly talk to his OT and see what we can put in his room to help him wind down. I bet J would get a kick out of some slow moving Christmas lights. He is *very* visual.

 

Haven't thought about essential oils-even though we love candles around here. J loves the smell of the fall ones, so hmm...maybe I should just get a pumpkin or apple candle and stick in his room.

 

The ceiling fan is on whenver he is in his room, it is not only cooling things off, but a white noise as well. He also has his air purifier running 24/7.

 

My 5 yr old only occasionally needs a nap and I know what you mean about being up with the birds, well rested or not. My kids don't really sleep in, they just wake up and act like ogres all day. But each child is SO different. If he needs the quiet time, he needs it.

 

What about a back rub? Would that help him unwind?

 

And I had one child that would just cry to unwind at the end of the day. I figured out that rocking, laying down with her etc, just prolonged bedtime and made her more tired and stressed, but if I put her in the bed, let her cry for five minutes, she'd be out like a light.

 

Back rubs are enjoyed by everyone in this house :) What he *really* likes is being rocked while held tightly (and I mean TIGHT) or bounced. Remeber those chairs that vibrate for babies-anyone want to make me one for a 6yr old. Yeah, he CRAVES that feeling. So, DH (when he is home) and I take turns literally bouncing him on the bed.

[2squared]

Have you tried therapeutic brushing with your ds? My sensory seeker loves the brushing, and I have been doing it before schoolwork and bedtime. It seems to feel like a massage to him.

 

I have my little sensory seeker on a rather structured routine. He gets lots of outside play in the morning, schoolwork in the afternoon, and then quiet time. Do you have your little guy on a routine that includes long stretches of time at home most days? I have found that my little guy needs a lot of time at home, he needs a lot of outdoor play climbing trees, swinging, etc (not structured activities), and he needs his days to be predictable. I run down the next day's schedule at night and then again in the morning. In fact, I give him schedule checks all through the day. If we have an outing planned, I start telling him about it a couple days in advance.

 

I have chosen to severly limit his social activities b/c honestly, he's only 6. He needs to learn about his body and have daily success rather than participate in structured activities.

[Mom2J112903]

We *just* started the brushing in the last week at OT. I need to ask his OT about getting a brush for here at home. I do think that would help.

 

Yes, very routined here.:) We do one subject, then playtime, sometimes that is 15 minutes, sometimes that is closer to an hour. It really depends on what *I* need to do and how J is reacting to the day.

 

We do gymnastics and soccer for his motor planning skills-his motor planning skills are at a level of a 4.6yr old. Yes, he does need both gymnastics and soccer for this. He would be LOST without soccer! The child thrives during soccer season.

 

Telling J about an activity days in advance only hightens his anxiety-not a good thing.

[fairfarmhand]

 

 

 

Back rubs are enjoyed by everyone in this house :) What he *really* likes is being rocked while held tightly (and I mean TIGHT) or bounced. Remeber those chairs that vibrate for babies-anyone want to make me one for a 6yr old. Yeah, he CRAVES that feeling. So, DH (when he is home) and I take turns literally bouncing him on the bed.

 

 

 

They make these cushions that do vibrate....

 

http://www.target.com/s/178-4550446-4281348?_encoding=UTF8&CPNG=Health%20Beauty&LID=5232525&search-alias=tgt-index&keywords=vibrating%20cushion&ref=tgt_adv_XSGT1644&searchNodeID=1038576|1287991011&afid=google&searchPage=1&LNM=vibrating_cushion

[LibraryLover]

:iagree: Good call!

:lurk5: (Too many carbs in this smilie lol) Blood sugars can vary daily. Hourly. Ask me how I know. lol I know my sensory kid depends on frequent protein.

[5LittleMonkeys]

I came back to this thread to see if you were able to find a solution and read this

J has social anxiety and SPD

. I'm not at all trying to be snarky but I wish you had put that in your original post. You probably could have skipped having to wade through all of the comments of people who were assuming this child was just being a stinker. Including me (or maybe just me:tongue_smilie:).

I have no experience with a child who has special needs like your special little guy and feel really bad for making the suggestion that he need to be punished in some way for his behavior. I wanted to apologize for my assumptions.

I do hope you can find something that will help both of you have more peaceful evenings.:001_smile:

[Mom2J112903]

It was mentioned on the 2nd page, and frankly it should not matter (in both DH's, myslef and the OT's) if the child is SN or not. A child should not be looked down upon because they need a nap or not. Children need to learn to comfort themselves and that is the ultimate goal with J.

 

I too am not being snarky, but we have never said "oh, J is a SPD kiddo we can't do xyz because of it" instead we say "J has SPD, what can we do so that J enjoys life to its fullest and just like a "normal" child".

 

Yesterday we had a playdate with our homeschool group-outside in the heat for over 2hrs. Then had our ASL class with them in the evening. I took him to see Daddy at work-he did not cry but he kept himself up until DH got home AFTER 830p! He knew that he would not get to see Daddy much today, DH is out of town on bussiness, so guess who was awake *before* the birds!

 

So far today, J is tired but focused, he has OT again today and I *pray* he takes a nap because otherwise, you will find my child up the flag pole :tongue_smilie: