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Graduation announcements--etiquette?


Michelle in MO
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Another question came up this week in regards to graduation announcements.

 

I received a graduation announcement from a friend that I graduated with from high school. I've not spoken to her nor exchanged letters for at least 10 years (no hard feelings; just busyness and different lives).

 

What would be the right way to handle this situation? Would you send a card with money or a gift card, or just a graduation card congratulating the new graduate?

 

I will also be sending out announcements. Do you send out announcements to a wide variety of friends and relatives, or only close family members and friends? If I do the former, is there a polite way to state that no gift is necessary--that you just wanted to announce the graduation of your ds or dd?

 

Personally, I don't want to send out announcements that could in any way be construed as a request for gifts.

 

Any thoughts or suggestions on the matter? I thought this might be the right forum to address this subject.

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I would be inclined to send a card to your friend (or is it to her child?) with your congratulations. I would not feel compelled to send a gift.

 

When we sent out announcements last year, I sent them to everyone to whom we send holiday cards. I also sent a few additional invitations to local friends to whom we don't normally send holiday cards and to some local friends of my daughter.

 

If you feel strongly about not receiving gifts, I would include a very small "No gifts, please." at the bottom of your announcement. We found that only a few of our very closest friends gave a gift along with a couple of my daughter's teachers and friends. I suspect that a "No gifts" note would not have deterred them.

 

Regards,

Kareni

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we are printing two different kinds: the invitations already went out, and next week I'll send a few announcements to dear friends and family who are far away and wouldn't come anyway.

 

Aside from family, we only sent to people who have meant a lot to us personally or to dd, encouraging her and/or having a role in her life. Many people did not receive an invitation or an announcement.

 

I asked the same question re. whether to put no gifts please a coupld of weeks ago. If you search by my board name, you'll see that I got varying advice, including Miss Manners' recommendation NOT to put anything like that. Dh and I finally decided that people are going to do what they want to do anyway, so I'd let them do whatever they feel led. Several people have already sent cards only, so I'm glad we went with that. Clearly people aren't uncomfortable just sending their congrats. :)

 

hth

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  • 2 weeks later...
Do you send out announcements to a wide variety of friends and relatives, or only close family members and friends? If I do the former, is there a polite way to state that no gift is necessary--that you just wanted to announce the graduation of your ds or dd?

 

Personally, I don't want to send out announcements that could in any way be construed as a request for gifts.

 

Any thoughts or suggestions on the matter? I thought this might be the right forum to address this subject.

 

A couple of years ago (I think) someone shared here on the boards what she had written for the occasion of announcing her child's graduation. It was really well-worded, and I was impressed--but I can't remember who it was. :tongue_smilie:

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  • 2 weeks later...

For your friend...I concur. A card only should suffice. For your announcements, send them to whomever you like! I sent out quite a bit, some sent gifts and some did not. I simply wanted people that I considered to have been a part of this journey, or a part of our lives to know that our ds was graduating. I did not expect gifts from everyone and did not get gifts from everyone! I do like the guideline someone said about your holiday card list and then others that you feel you need to include. That is a great suggestion! :D

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