PLease help me respond to these comments

[delaney]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

4. They won't get into colleges.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

Thanks for your help.

[kmacnchs]

I would want to comment for hours and defend myself but, as I have learned on this forum, all that is needed is...

 

PASS THE BEAN DIP!!!!!!!!!!

 

b/c they really don't want to know or care what your responses are so why waste your emotional energy, thoughts, or time trying to explain...

 

you know WE support you :)

[Daisy]

I will not have a battle of wits with an unarmed man/woman.

 

JUST KIDDING.

 

I usually say, "Thank you for your concern, but we are not really worried about it."

[OhM]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

4. They won't get into colleges.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

Thanks for your help.

 

OOOHHh - this looks like a fun game! Of course, the "pass the bean dip" is the only worthwhile response, but here are my "dream" responses:D

1. Oh, I certainly hope so!

2. Oh, I certainly hope not!

3. Yeah, like that Tim Tebow. Freak.

4. Pshaw.

5. If by real world, you mean a 30' x 30' room containing 20 of their peers and one adult who is there under duress, then I can live with that!

 

(And this is from someone who has and will allow my kids to return to ps in the future! I'm not hostile to ps - these are simply ridiculous and ill-informed comments.)

[Ellie]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

Ok.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

Yes, I am.

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

Oh, that's wonderful!

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.[/qutoe]

Oh, you mean social skills like the ones I see displayed on the playground? in the locker room? when the classroom students are passing notes and mocking the teacher? or relentlessly teasing their hapless classmates? Those social skills? Yeah, I'm not too worried about that.

4. They won't get into colleges.

Really? And yet I've read that many colleges actively recruit homeschooled grads because they do so well on college campuses, both academically and socially.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

You know, I've been living in the "real" world for lo, these many years now, and I'm pretty sure that nothing I learned in a classroom environment was anything like the real world.

 

Possibly I would give different answers on a day when I'm feeling less sarcastic.

 

Or not.:tongue_smilie:

[Mrs Mungo]

Well, let me put it this way. One day a gas station attendant asked if school was out because I was in there with my kids. I said (friendly-like) "oh, we homeschool." She started quizzing me in a really abrupt manner about whether it was legal whether I was qualified, how I was held accountable by the state and I finally said "right, because your public school education took you so far in life," and walked out. If people ask questions in a curious way, I give them answers. If people are rude to me, I'm rude right back. I just don't have it in me any more to put up with people's crap.

 

Here are some links with responses to and rants about critics of homeschoolers. Some are funny, some are straight-forward, some are well-researched, some are a little profane:

 

http://homeedmag.com/HEM/254/takingcharge.html

 

http://school.familyeducation.com/home-schooling/human-relations/56224.html

 

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071210075341AAVEIFW

 

http://docsdomain.net/blog/?p=756

[Margo out of lurking]

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

4. They won't get into colleges.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

 

#1. "No weirder than I am now! Do you have any plans for Superbowl?"

 

#2. "Have you seen the classrooms? I'm sure they'll be fine! Aren't you getting tired of all this snow?"

 

#3. "No weirder than they are now! So what are you doing for Superbowl?"

 

#4. "Trust me, colleges actively recruit homeschoolers now. There's nothing to worry about. Have you found any new sledding hills?"

 

#5. "Oh, you can bet we'll be out in the real world! Are you going to watch the Superbowl?"

 

That's how you "pass the bean dip," answer briefly and/or vaguely, then change the subject.

 

Since you're using ABeka, I'm assuming you prayed about this decision. I've answered comments in the past with, "God just really put it on our hearts to hs, so we'll be doing this as long as it's His plan for our family!" No one can really argue with that one.

 

For those closer family members who really don't understand and for whom you care to share with, you can be very reassuring, "I know you're concerned. But you know we wouldn't do this if it weren't in the best interests of our family. We can always change our minds later. For now, I welcome your support!"

 

Of course, you may still have people who disagree. It's always best to not engage. You're not raising your kids for them, you don't have to answer to them, and you probably would not make many of the same decisions as they've made in their lives.

 

And congratulations!!!!! Have FUN!!!! Hsing was one of the best decisions we ever made for our family. We had no idea it would turn out like this!!!

[HeatherM2]

Well, let me put it this way. One day a gas station attendant asked if school was out because I was in there with my kids. I said (friendly-like) "oh, we homeschool." She started quizzing me in a really abrupt manner about whether it was legal whether I was qualified, how I was held accountable by the state and I finally said "right, because your public school education took you so far in life," and walked out.

 

:lol: Thanks for the laugh!

[delaney]

#1. "No weirder than I am now! Do you have any plans for Superbowl?"

 

#2. "Have you seen the classrooms? I'm sure they'll be fine! Aren't you getting tired of all this snow?"

 

#3. "No weirder than they are now! So what are you doing for Superbowl?"

 

#4. "Trust me, colleges actively recruit homeschoolers now. There's nothing to worry about. Have you found any new sledding hills?"

 

#5. "Oh, you can bet we'll be out in the real world! Are you going to watch the Superbowl?"

 

That's how you "pass the bean dip," answer briefly and/or vaguely, then change the subject.

 

Since you're using ABeka, I'm assuming you prayed about this decision. I've answered comments in the past with, "God just really put it on our hearts to hs, so we'll be doing this as long as it's His plan for our family!" No one can really argue with that one.

 

For those closer family members who really don't understand and for whom you care to share with, you can be very reassuring, "I know you're concerned. But you know we wouldn't do this if it weren't in the best interests of our family. We can always change our minds later. For now, I welcome your support!"

 

Of course, you may still have people who disagree. It's always best to not engage. You're not raising your kids for them, you don't have to answer to them, and you probably would not make many of the same decisions as they've made in their lives.

 

And congratulations!!!!! Have FUN!!!! Hsing was one of the best decisions we ever made for our family. We had no idea it would turn out like this!!!

Actually I am not what you would call religious but am using it on rec from another HSer. I am hoping that it will help enlighten me and bring me back to feeling more in touch with my religious roots-KWIM?

[smrtmama]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

4. They won't get into colleges.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

Thanks for your help.

 

1. "Get" all weird? I'm very flattered you don't think they're weird now!

2. College classrooms are very different from public school classrooms. Our children will adjust very well to the more reasonable, mature expectations of a self-directed college classroom.

3. "Social skills" these days often involve being able to interact via online multi-user games. Yes, our children might lack in those areas. We're ok with that.

4. Colleges are accepting more homeschoolers than ever. We're confident that our children's well-rounded education will make them suitable candidates for college admission.

5. The real world seldom takes place inside a carefully controlled classroom environment, as modeling in public and traditional private schools. Our children are learning to learn in a more versatile environment.

[elegantlion]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

4. They won't get into colleges.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

Thanks for your help.

 

Okay, I'll play too.

 

1. Why would we be any more weird now? (followed by blank stare and silence)

2. Great, this will give us time to get adjusted to being a family.

3. (A blank stare and silence)

4. Really? Have you checked the statistics on homeschoolers attending college? (another blank stare and silence)

5. No, we'll be able to go out into the real world during the day now, like normal people or weird people.

 

Or an all encompassing statement: Really? (followed by a blank stare, silence, and then smile)

[sunshine]

I have been asked the exact questions, different people at different times and what has worked for me has been:

 

Laugh out loud like they just told a joke and then look at them and say

"oh wait, I am so sorry, you weren't just kidding were you? You must know nothing about homeschooling, let't go get a coffee and I will fill you in"

 

To date I have corrupted over 7 families into homeschooling. No kidding, 7 and I have a cousin who is praying she will be able to homeschool her 2 yr old when it it time.

[myfunnybunch]

I want to answer with well thought out answers.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

4. They won't get into colleges.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

 

How about this?

:001_rolleyes:

 

Or this?

:smilielol5:

 

Oh, wait, you wanted well-thought-out.

 

A smile and a confident, "We're really looking forward to this exciting journey."

 

Then add (choose one or more, lol):

"Don't worry, we'll stay just as weird as we are right now."

"Most classroom behavior, such as sitting still, taking turns to speak and listen, or following directions is simple courtesy and common sense, and they've already got that."

"I'm not worried about their social skills."

"Many colleges accept or even seek out homeschooled students."

"Our children will have so many opportunities to experience our community and interact with many different people."

 

And finish with, "So, how about the weather?" (Or topic change of your choice.)

 

Cat

[MariannNOVA]

Well, let me put it this way. One day a gas station attendant asked if school was out because I was in there with my kids. I said (friendly-like) "oh, we homeschool." She started quizzing me in a really abrupt manner about whether it was legal whether I was qualified, how I was held accountable by the state and I finally said "right, because your public school education took you so far in life," and walked out. If people ask questions in a curious way, I give them answers. If people are rude to me, I'm rude right back. I just don't have it in me any more to put up with people's crap.

 

This is me to a "T." And, that is what I would have said to the gas station attendant.

[Mrs Mungo]

This is me to a "T." And, that is what I would have said to the gas station attendant.

 

For the record, my children were aghast. They are better socialized than I am. I went to public school, after all. ;) <--- this winkie denotes humor.

[....]

To date I have corrupted over 7 families into homeschooling. No kidding, 7 and I have a cousin who is praying she will be able to homeschool her 2 yr old when it it time.

 

I have also committed this crime. There is a neighbor-family in MO that now homeschools because I made such a compelling argument one day. :D

[Slartibartfast]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

4. They won't get into colleges.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

Thanks for your help.

 

"Crack kills"

[Sebastian (a lady)]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

4. They won't get into colleges.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

Thanks for your help.

 

First I would try to be gentle spirited in my answers, because some of your friends, especially anyone you know who still has kids in the school, may feel that there is an unspoken criticism from you that they aren't homeschooling.

I also think that it's worth trying to discern who is being genuinely interested/concerned from those who are being nosy. (FWIW, three different families from one local class have pulled kids out to homeschool in the last couple months. I'd like to think that my being willing to talk about the pluses and minuses of homeschooling has helped at least a couple of these families in making that choice.)

 

Here are some of the answers that I might use.

 

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

A. Oh, you know that I've been weird for a long time.

B. If weird means choosing what is best for your family, I guess so.

C. No, I'm saving that up for menopause.

(Seriously, what sort of a question is that? Homeschooling is weird. There are something like 2 million homeschoolers and that doesn't count kids who move in and out of homeschooling for various reasons like conflict with a specific teacher, changing grades, or moving school districts.)

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

A. I don't think that will be any more difficult that adjusting to the real world after being in classrooms for 13+ years.

B. There are several qualities of classroom learning that I hope they are never comfortable with, (insert some of the dissatisfactions that led to your pulling them out), that's why we weren't satisfied with their classrooms in the first place.

C. Really, like what? (Sometimes just making the questioner justify what they mean is enough to make them see that they are being sort of silly).

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

(See answers to #1)

A. I don't think you have to be homeschooled to be on a different place on the social spectrum. Or are you saying that no one from schools are weird or sometimes socially awkward?

4. They won't get into colleges.

A. Actually most colleges are more than willing to accept qualified homeschooler. Certainly there are some homeschoolers who have worked harder and taken their education more seriously than others. But isn't that true of all teenagers? Did you know that some elite colleges even actively recruit homeschoolers because they feel that they make excellent college students?

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

A. I think they're more likely to encounter the real world outside of the restrictions of a classroom and the behavior management restrictions that you find there. Classrooms have to use play food and dishes. We can actually cook a meal with real food. Classrooms have to show videos; we can go to the zoo or the beach or the park. Remember how you wanted to go outside and sit in the sun to do reading or math? We can do that.

For all the talk of diversity, a classroom segregates kids by age and limits encounters to only kids who live in that school's area. We are free to go from one end of town to another. (I love to mention a great field trip here.)

 

Having said all of that. I think there are few people who you owe an explanation to. If you feel uncomfortable or that someone is out of line, remember that you're the mom, not them. You wouldn't let them tell you what appropriate medical treatment or diet for controlling allergies was unless they were an expert you were consulting (and even then, you'd be right to weigh what they advised against other expert advice). Surely education is at least as important as this.

Be courteous. Be confident. Don't ever be afraid to pass the bean dip.

[Pamela H in Texas]

"Thank you for your concern. Isn't it awfully early in the year for butterflies?"

 

or any other comment that you can come up with about what is going on around you or that you've seen/done in the last week

 

If people ask honest questions, answer them briefly then move the conversation on to something else. But the above statements are inappropriate and don't warrant much in terms of answers. If someone pushes it, you could say, "I'm so glad you care about our family. We've done our research and we're very pleased with our current choices." Then, again, change the subject.

[rubyinprogress]

Do what is best for your family. Don't stress about strangers who don't know what they are talking about. You can always put it right back in their laps. "You should research that, I think you'll be surprised!" (If they really care they'll look into it, if they don't they probably won't continue the conversation.) Just FYI I have a degree in social and behavioral sciences. The definition I learned for "socialization" is adults influencing children to become productive members of society. This is not the meaning of "socialization" in pop culture. I have found it useful to educate concerned people on this issue. Other times I mention the social activities my kids are involved in (church, clubs, sports, etc). Answering a question with a question works too. What social skills have your children learned in school?

[mcconnellboys]

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you? "Why yes, darling, as weird as we want to be! Vive la difference!"

 

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

 

Ummmm, haven't they been in your home their entire lives? Were they able to adjust when they first went to school? If they did that, why on earth wouldn't they be able to do it again? Are adults who go back to college after years away able to "adjust to classrooms"? That's a completely absurd comment. Does one forget how to swim? how to ride a bicycle? Just absurd.....

 

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

 

Do they have social skills now? How did they arrive at those? Isn't it the job of the parent to teach things such as social skills? Or am I missing something and that's now been delegated to the state....

 

Most publically schooled kids I know are at least somewhat lacking in "social skills" such as empathy, good manners, and other sorts of polite behaviour - unless they happen to have very strict parents who have stayed on top of that issue throughout their school careers. In those cases, they have social skills in spite of their school careers, not because of them....

 

What social skills would you say your children have learned from school thus far? Are they things that you cherish? Are they things that you can instill, yourself?

 

Is "being weird" determined by what sort of school we attend, really?

 

 

4. They won't get into colleges.

 

Perhaps you should visit our sub-board for college age students off our high school board. I believe there's a current list going of all the various colleges and universities which have admitted - along with merit scholarships that have been issued - our current seniors thus far this year.... I've seen no trouble with admissions, from ivies through state universities of all sizes.... Not in this or any other of the 11 years I've been homeschooling, anyway....

 

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

Hmmmmm, is your home, perhaps, suspended within some other dimension? That would be awesome for science experiments, but barring that fact, I believe, my dear, that you LIVE in the real world. Do you plan to suspend normal life with your children, lock them to a bed post, shut them in a closet for ten years or so? If not, then I suspect you will continue to live in the "real" world.

 

Would you really consider warehoused schools the "real" world? Do you think that once your children grow up and go into the workforce they will have jobs in factories where they'll be locked up all day with 30 or so other same age people, all supervised by one older person? "School" as we know public schooling today, is not like any real world experience that I can envision.....

 

Perhaps if you just laugh at these sorts of comments - and laugh, and laugh, and laugh - then those who make them will have time to begin to think about what they've said and realize how very ridiculous such statements are....

Edited February 3, 2010 by mcconnellboys

[Hedgehogs4]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

Well, as a matter of fact, I am planning to. Guess you'd better decide now if you still want to hang out with me.

 

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

I hope not.

 

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

My kids are already weird. I was hoping to keep it under wraps, that's why I brought them home.

 

4. They won't get into colleges.

Oh really? Oops.

 

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

Have you heard of the Matrix?

 

Thanks for your help.

sorry, but people who make comments like that don't deserve serious answers from me. you may be nicer and more patient with such people, but i tend to give snarky, tongue in cheek answers. just have a little fun with it, even if you don't say it directly to their face!

[elizabeth]

Read The Well Trained Mind by Susan Wise Bauer and Jessie Wise. There are excellent chapters addressing many of these concerns. Usually ppl have no idea what a vast range of choices exist that were unthought of even a decade ago!! It is a wonderful book and the next time someone begins to question your plans you can watch their eyes glaze over as you discuss different methods of sentence diagramming, latin or greek, history topically and chronologically and why it matters and so on. My late Aunt, a loving and well intentioned person with a doctorate in education from USD was agog, jaw hanging open, when I shared my various lesson plans and syllabi for the year along with the book lists and various curricula for just one year. She had never seen anything along these lines and was used to homeschooling as" school in a box" at its best and negligent abscence of any education at all at its worst. She had no idea what hsing today was like with the ability to do online coursework, coop learning , college courses, AP , etc. The model she was basing her opinions on was one stereotype that likely existed 25 years ago and might still be used today but by choice, not because real alternatives do not exist. Become well read about the options that make it a better choice for your family. Some will still refuse to accept your choices but that is their issue. I often have found that sharing information helps dispel untrue generalizations. If not they must really not have enough to think about in their lives . I have no time to tell others how to raise their children because I am too busy trying like the dickens to do the best I can do for our family. Please read the book as it really will give you the support and information you need to raise your confidence and the lists of resources alone are well worth the time and money saved by avoiding things that you will know are not workable for your needs.

[MariannNOVA]

]For the record' date=' my children were aghast.[/color'][/size] They are better socialized than I am. I went to public school, after all. ;) <--- this winkie denotes humor.

 

DD10 would be aghast -- the twins would elbow each other and laugh. I was educated in private schools......but I'm old and tired.I LOVE how you made an arrow!!!!!!!!!!:D

Edited February 3, 2010 by MariannNOVA

[Charles Wallace]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

 

Thanks for your help.

 

Here are my answers! I'm more about the smartalecky comeback, though, than the well thought-out answers -- that is, to people whose real agenda is not to express genuine concern or interest, but to use questions as a form of foregone-conclusion-style criticism.

 

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

**You mean I was normal before?

 

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

***Option 1: Thank God!

***Option 2: I'm having special bathroom passes made right now just so he won't miss out.

 

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

***Normal people rarely make history.

 

4. They won't get into colleges.

***I'll be sure to tell that to Harvard. And Stanford...and Yale...

 

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

***Option 1: The unicorns and fairies are way cooler in OUR world ANYway.

***Option 2: That's why once a week, I beat him up on his way to the bathroom, steal his lunch, and try to sell him drugs.

 

Hope this helps!

[Audrey]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

4. They won't get into colleges.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

Thanks for your help.

 

 

1. No, I won't. It makes me even more bland actually. It's unbelievable how much homeschooling cuts into your political protest and goat sacrificing time.

 

2. I've got that covered. Part of our curriculum includes cornering him in the bathroom for a beat down and stealing his money. And we already always pick him last on the playground.

 

3. No problem there. His career goal is research scientist. No social skills required.

 

4. Maybe I should clarify that "research scientist" actually means "mad scientist." We'll lock him in the basement for 10-15 years and call that college.

 

5. Do you mean the 'real world' where people ask you questions so obnoxious that you have to answer with caustic sarcasm?

 

 

Or alternately.... you could simply respond with "you might want to save your commentary for someone who actually cares what you think."

 

And, I'm not kidding. I have verbally ripped a strip off of people who ask obnoxious questions or feel they need to give their obnoxious commentary on homeschooling to me. I will do it again if need be.

Edited February 3, 2010 by Audrey

[Mynyel]

DD10 would be aghast -- the twins would elbow each other and laugh. I was educated in private schools......but I'm old and tired.I LOVE how you made an arrow!!!!!!!!!!:D

 

Here are my answers! I'm more about the smartalecky comeback, though, than the well thought-out answers -- that is, to people whose real agenda is not to express genuine concern or interest, but to use questions as a form of foregone-conclusion-style criticism.

 

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

**You mean I was normal before?

 

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

***Option 1: Thank God!

***Option 2: I'm having special bathroom passes made right now just so he won't miss out.

 

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

***Normal people rarely make history.

 

4. They won't get into colleges.

***I'll be sure to tell that to Harvard. And Stanford...and Yale...

 

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

***Option 1: The unicorns and fairies are way cooler in OUR world ANYway.

***Option 2: That's why once a week, I beat him up on his way to the bathroom, steal his lunch, and try to sell him drugs.

 

Hope this helps!

 

 

ok you two and Mrs. Mungo (sp?) are fast becoming my favorite people!

 

:grouphug::grouphug:

[MariannNOVA]

ok you two and Mrs. Mungo (sp?) are fast becoming my favorite people!

 

:grouphug::grouphug:

 

 

AWWWWWW...seriously, thank you!

[Aubrey]

Oooh, ooh, how about:

 

"Have ya seen that movie w/ Brendan Frasier, Blast from the Past? We've decided to model our child's education after a kid raised in a fallout shelter."

[Remudamom]

I have just this week pulled my DS from school and will not be sending the 2 girls back next year. (oldest DS is in HS and loves it and the DS I just pulled will go on to middle school next year).

Anyway here are the comments I am getting and I want to answer with well thought out answers.

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

4. They won't get into colleges.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

 

Thanks for your help.

 

Ooookay. Here's my reply, but keep in mind I'm sitting here drinking rum!

1. Not as weird as YOUR kids.

2. Tough ^*%&.

3. See #1 or #2.

4. ^*&% yes they will. Remudamom's kids got in and are doing great. (scholarship, brilliant grades, etc.)

5. Praise the Lord.

[MariannNOVA]

Oooh, ooh, how about:

 

"Have ya seen that movie w/ Brendan Frasier, Blast from the Past? We've decided to model our child's education after a kid raised in a fallout shelter."

 

EXCELLENT!

[StephanieZ]

Change the subject (i.e., the famous WTM "pass the bean dip" strategy)

 

And. . . give it time. In a few months, the queries will slow down. In a few years, everyone who knows you and cares for you will (mostly) approve of and appreciate your hs'ing b/c they will see the positive results in your dc.

 

Whatever you do, don't get your hackles up. Just breathe deep, move on, and find people to talk about hs'ing with who *support* your journey.

[Mrs Mungo]

Oooh, ooh, how about:

 

"Have ya seen that movie w/ Brendan Frasier, Blast from the Past? We've decided to model our child's education after a kid raised in a fallout shelter."

 

If you're going to do that, you might as well do it right. Just say (totally deadpan), "you'll see it differently when the revolution comes."

[eternalknot]

I want to answer with well thought out answers.

 

:) There's a time for sarcastic responses, and a time for thoughtful reply. Most times and audiences call for a marriage of the two. I think you have some 'street cred' as a teacher turned homeschooler that will lend weight to well-thought out answers. I'd play that part up LOL:

 

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you?

That's actually part of the appeal! We're opting for a breather because our kids need/want/would most benefit from some individual academic attention. It would be more weird to ignore my intuition and keep trucking just for the sake of doing what's more socially acceptable.

 

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you.

I have faith/confidence/trust in their abilities to adapt, as demonstrated by their annual adjusting to a new teacher/new school/new coach/new sibling/new school material/etc. They're resilient and looking forward to this adventure; I wouldn't tamper with their well-being if they were as delicate as some children are treated/thought to be. Honestly, we consider it great training for their character to experience and overcome perceived challenges. If there is a re-adjustment period to classroom school, it will be a "real world" experience that can only better prepare them for college and/or the workforce. Better to learn before there is tuition/scholarship or a job on the line, right?

 

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird.

[i'll go against the grain here and say that this is a somewhat valid concern. There are definitely weird homeschoolers who lack social skills. But the two are not mutually inclusive, and that's what you need to address.] They're not going to leave their social skills at the schoolhouse door! They'll continue to do x- sports/church/music/etc. in their free time, that won't be changing. And as a teacher, I can honestly attest to how much of a school day is spent reminding kids that we're there to learn - NOT TO SOCIALIZE! We would hope friends prove themselves true by continuing to socialize with us, regardless of our differences in faith, culture, color, or .. even educational choices. We're bringing the kids home to do school; we are not shipping them off to a remote island, never to be seen or heard from again.

 

4. They won't get into colleges.

If their test scores and transcripts prove them worthy and competitive college candidates, they absolutely will. I'm not sure why anyone would presume otherwise. OR wait, - are you suggesting they won't keep up to par with (or exceed) the education they would receive at X Public/Private School? If that's the case, I'm miffed/offended/hurt by the implication.

 

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world.

Define "real world" -- my perception must differ from yours, and I want to be sure we're on the same page. Homeschooling offers one-on-one/three/etc tutoring. With that kind of efficiency, we're able to expose the kids to the Real World on a very regular, integrated, and very real basis while other students are still in classrooms or working on homework. We're not shoving the kids into a bubble or locking them in the tower for the eight hours their peers are at the schoolhouse; we're actually streamlining one aspect of their lives (education) so they can, in fact, gain MORE and truer exposure to the "real" world!

 

 

Snarky remarks feel SO GOOD sometimes, and I'm sure there are instances when they are truly called for. But generally, I trust that most people are doing what we ALL do -- going by passing stereotypes we have no real investment in. I'd rather leave a good taste in their mouths about the homeschooler they've met, than to be that yucky aftertaste that "proves" their negative generalization correct. I have siblings, inlaws, cousins and friends who are teachers and principals so I've had the above conversations ad naseum. It definitely gets annoying after awhile, but ... I guess I'm just not militant about my decision to homeschool because it's not a primary part of my identity. It's not who I am, it's just what I do.

 

I'm an odd duck who has always done things differently than most people around me, and I've come to realize that there is a process to that. You start off feeling unsure of your decision, then over time gradually move towards righteousness. Well after awhile you stop taking things so personally and find that blessed middle ground where you can be you, they can be they, and it's all good all around.

 

Best wishes on your new journey :001_smile:

[sunshine]

If you're going to do that, you might as well do it right. Just say (totally deadpan), "you'll see it differently when the revolution comes."

 

:smilielol5::smilielol5::cheers2:

 

Oh My Cow! Why didn't I think of that!!!! That is my standard answer from now on!

[texasmama]

I'm kind of funny and sarcastic so keep that in mind. ;)

 

 

1. You aren't going to get all weird now are you? Not any weirder than I ever was! hehehe

2. Your kids will not be able to adjust to classrooms after being home with you. Kids are pretty adjustable creatures. (big smile)

3. Your kids will not have any social skills and be weird. Awesome - they'll be just like me! (laughing)

4. They won't get into colleges. The statistics don't bear that out, but you can believe that if you wish.

5. They won't get enough exposure to the "real" world. And I am so grateful for that.

 

Thanks for your help.

[Joanne]

Change the subject (i.e., the famous WTM "pass the bean dip" strategy)

 

 

 

Not to be a total............{insert word}

 

But the Bean Dip strategy is not owned by the WTM hive mind forum, but actually by me.

 

It's also not just "changing the subject" but a healthy approach to progressive (if needed) boundaries.

[kmacnchs]

Not to be a total............{insert word}

 

But the Bean Dip strategy is not owned by the WTM hive mind forum, but actually by me.

 

It's also not just "changing the subject" but a healthy approach to progressive (if needed) boundaries.

 

Sorry about that!!! I knew it originated from someone, I just didn't know who, and this just happens to be the forum in which I heard it. Should have known it was you :D It is such wise council too!

[delaney]

thanks ladies! I think I will write these down on my arm like a QB playbook!

[Charles Wallace]

AWWWWWW...seriously, thank you!

 

 

Thanks!!!

 

Oh, and I am BIG-TIME lovin' the "You'll see differently when the revolution comes..." answer!!!

Edited February 4, 2010 by Charles Wallace