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What should I do about this birthday party? Do we go?


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I forgot about a birthday party for one of DD4 preschool friends and neglected to RSVP until earlier this week. I called and left a message, but there was no name on the outgoing voicemail, just the automated "This person is unavailable" message. On the message, I said that I knew I was RSVPing very late, that we'd love to come, but that if it was too late to add someone to the final count, I completely understood and just to let me know. I left my number. They didn't call back. I verified the number a bunch of times (it was on my cell record), so I know I called the right number.

 

This morning I called again and left a message that I was just trying to confirm whether or not we should come tomorrow, and asked if there was anything special the boy collects or would like.

 

Now what do I do? If they don't call back, do we go or not go? I don't want to make anyone feel bad by showing up if they didn't get my messages and didn't add us to the list, but I also don't want anyone to feel bad if we don't show up after I called twice and they were expecting us but didn't get to call back! This also affects my DD7, because she'll have to sleep over at my mom's if we go to this party.

 

What do you think (beside that I'm a dink for not RSVPing on time in the first place--I already know that part)?

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I think you should go. It doesn't sound like you asked for a confirmation for your first call, only to call you if there was a problem. If you called the correct number and there was no call back, assume your rsvp was accepted. If they do not call back today, it's possible they are preparing for the party and are not able to. I know the day before a party at our house can get pretty hairy! Show up with a gift your daughter picks out, and have a great time!!

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You called Thursday? The party is Saturday, I'm assuming. I think it would depend on the venue. If the party is at a park or someone's house, I'd go anyway. If the party is at a location that requires a head count by early in the week, then I'd be less likely to try and go without some kind of confirmation.

 

I'd definitely make sure I had a birthday present for the child even if I had to hand deliver it at the preschool.

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You called Thursday? The party is Saturday, I'm assuming. I think it would depend on the venue. If the party is at a park or someone's house, I'd go anyway. If the party is at a location that requires a head count by early in the week, then I'd be less likely to try and go without some kind of confirmation.

 

I'd definitely make sure I had a birthday present for the child even if I had to hand deliver it at the preschool.

 

I originally called on Tuesday morning, and yes, it's at a jumphouse place :( That was my main concern--the final number thing. I'm really, really hoping she calls back and makes this all moot, though I know it's like Stacie said--the day before the party is always nutso. I feel so bad for messing this up!

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I think you should go to the party. It does help with planning when people RSVP, but our children have had many parties with guests that had not RSVP'd. Our children are just happy that their friends can come. They're not worried about the RSVP's. Hopefully the hosting Mom will be gracious and have that attitude. If you sense otherwise when you arrive, then you will have an opportunity to be gracious to her.

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Hooray!! The dad just called and said yes, please come, they had already added us to the list. I'm so relieved. Now I just have to figure out what on earth to get a 5-year-old boy I've never met as a gift!

 

Thank you all for the advice, and Karen, welcome to the board :D

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