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I've been feeling so very average lately


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I'm just your average person. Yes, I run. I even run marathons. But I'm slow. I'm barely in the middle of the group. I do triathlons. But again, I'm thrilled to be in the middle oft he pack.

 

My kids are average. Nothing stellar about my kids. They are good in sports. But certainly not scholarship material. Not straight A's either.

 

My house is average. I read just this week that the average size new house is even a tad bit bigger than my house (like 2562 sq ft, new not mine). It's not beautifully decorated. It's ok. Nothing special. And I certainly don't keep it clean.

 

I'm a so-so mom. I don't get down and play with my kids. I don't do crafts with them. I love them and I try to show it to them. But darn it, I want to use *my* love language! I want to kiss and hug and hold them. That's not the love language for any of them!

 

I'm lazy. I'm "happy" not doing anything but sitting on the computer. Not really, I do get bored but then I also don't want to do anything that I should be doing either.

 

I'm a so-so cook. Nothing special. It's all edible but nothing is fantastic. I can follow a recipe just like anyone else.

 

I was happy with my BS degree. I didn't get a masters. I worked at an environmental firm doing bench chemistry. I wasn't doing the same thing day in day out. But it wasn't earth shattering work either.

 

I'm not particularly out going. I have a small circle of friends. I have a lot of acquaintances. There are times that the only who makes me feel loved is the cat - she cuddles! (see the mom paragraph)

 

My body is average. I'm not skinny like I was before kids. Like so many women I see today, even after kids! One friend has had 4 boys and she's as thin as I was before kids! I'm borderline overweight. So again, average.

 

I don't hate my life and who I am. I just feel so darn average. I want to feel special! I want to do something better than anyone else.

 

It's late and I need to go to bed. Maybe this is all PMS?

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:grouphug: I know the feeling. Though honestly somedays average is nice, because average is "normal" and some days I feel so weird/odd/different, and I know my kids certainly are I hope for normal aka average

 

Though this particular line

I'm lazy. I'm "happy" not doing anything but sitting on the computer. Not really, I do get bored but then I also don't want to do anything that I should be doing either.

 

I can relate to more than all the rest :glare: so at least you have some company being average

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Wow, it must be something in the air (or the hormones) because your post sounds alot like what I have been feeling since turning 40 this year. I don't know how to make you feel special but at least know you're not the only average person with an average family and home. We are very average too! Someone has to be average and at least we are not below average. ;)

Hope you feel more special soon!

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You are special to God. He made you. He died for you. And he has a plan especially for you. That plan may not be a razzle-dazzle one to the world, but it is an eternal plan.

 

(I also vote for PMS).

 

:iagree: You sound just like Larry when he wants to be someone exciting: Larry-Boy. :D

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I said something like this (minus the running part) to my hubby one time. In his attempt to comfort me said, "No-you are a good solid B+" LOL!!!!! Dh has never had the gift of words of encouragement. Then he went on to tell me that there are very few A's and that being a good solid B+ is a compliment. This is now a family joke.

 

So, you are above average. You are a good solid B+

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Wow, I can TOTALLY RELATE. Except for the average house part--we are below average. Way below, but let's not go there.

 

Anyhoo, just want to say you are not alone....nope, not alone. I guess that's the great thing about being average.

 

PS. I too vote for PMS.

 

PPS. Now that I think about it, if you can run marathons, you are SOOO not average! That puts you WAY above the pack. Take it from someone who thinks she's really cool to hit 2 miles.:D

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I said something like this (minus the running part) to my hubby one time. In his attempt to comfort me said, "No-you are a good solid B+" LOL!!!!! Dh has never had the gift of words of encouragement. Then he went on to tell me that there are very few A's and that being a good solid B+ is a compliment. This is now a family joke.

 

So, you are above average. You are a good solid B+

 

Oh wow Mindy; this sounds exactly like something MY dh would say. And he would mean it as a HUGE compliment, and not understand why I didn't take it that way.

 

B+, indeed. :glare: :D

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You have summed up how I feel most days except I cannot even pretend to run. Some days I feel like our roles are so many that we cannot identify with only one role that we excel at so it leads us to feel only "average" at everything. Know that what you do every day and the sacrifices you make will have long lasting effects. Your children and hubby know and will continue to know that they are loved and that you will continue to sacrifice and give no matter what. The material things are only that-"you cannot take them with you" as someone once told me when I was complaining about not having the best of something or my house not being the nicest. Take a long bath, enjoy a good book, drink some hot tea and know that you are way above average!

:grouphug:Shannon in NC

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When I was little adults were into building our self esteem on how we are all unique and special. I remember Mr. Rogers saying, "You're special!" and I was thinking, "If we are all special then that's not too special, is it?" My parents used to try to encourage me by saying, "You can read!" "You're a ballerina!" and I knew it wasn't true. I knew it was all fake. The parents greatest joy was when their child did something earlier, better or easier than the other kids. I am trying not to raise my children with this kind of thinking. It can be done. My husband is from a down-to-earth island in the Caribbean and they don't raise their children to think that way.

 

I once saw a show about a man who was born with no arms. We was raised in a handicapped children's orphanage. He said if a child there could do something for himself, the workers had him do it. It didn't matter if it took a long time, if it was messy, or if they needed a special tool. If they could do it, the workers would not do it for the child. He said he grew up feeling like he could do anything. He said, "Being the best never mattered to me. Just doing it, is was what mattered to me." I thought that was inspirational.

 

The book Sidetracked Home Executives is great for getting organized and cleaning your house. I had a hard time with that. It wasn't that I was lazy so much as I needed help. When I see or hear of someone doing a great job as a stay-at-home mother, instead of feeling bad that they have beat me, I feel inspired. I try to do a good job with what I have to do - cooking, cleaning, teaching etc. I go to bed feeling satified.

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How old are hon? Sounds like it could be mid-life creeping up on you. Average is not so bad really. There are so many days that I would give anything for average. But honestly, I feel no need to be spactacular at anything. If I can get all of my children healthy, happy and out of the house I will feel like I have really accomplished a lot.

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You know Cheryl, I was thinking about this post on my run this morning. Does it help to know that you are my running inspiration? I think of you nearly every morning as I head out. I think of things you've said - if I'm having a hard run, I remember your post about the hard time you were having before your marathon last year. Knowing that you did it, has helped me through many runs/races and has even inspired me to try a marathon.

 

And, you are everything to your kids. Even if you are average!

 

:grouphug:

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How old are hon? Sounds like it could be mid-life creeping up on you. Average is not so bad really. There are so many days that I would give anything for average. But honestly, I feel no need to be spactacular at anything. If I can get all of my children healthy, happy and out of the house I will feel like I have really accomplished a lot.

 

I do turn 40 this year. But I'm happy to be turning 40! The only thing I'm not looking forward to about my birthday is the stupid question my FIL always asks: "So how does it feel to be x?" One of these days someone is going to turn on him and say "I don't know, how does it feel to ask that stupid question at everyone's birthday every year?"

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You know Cheryl, I was thinking about this post on my run this morning. Does it help to know that you are my running inspiration? I think of you nearly every morning as I head out. I think of things you've said - if I'm having a hard run, I remember your post about the hard time you were having before your marathon last year. Knowing that you did it, has helped me through many runs/races and has even inspired me to try a marathon.

 

And, you are everything to your kids. Even if you are average!

 

:grouphug:

 

It does help Jen! It also makes me cry! That's it! I'm claiming hormones!

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I don't think anyone who runs marathons is average. :001_smile: Your posts and comments in the past have helped me to keep running. I don't run fast. I don't even run in the middle of the pack.

 

I know how you're feeling. I've been there. I get those days when I feel like I am unable to do anything well. Everything I do is so-so. It doesn't help that I tend to be surrounded by people to manage to do most things very well.

 

On those days I try to remember that I should let other people's excellence inspire me to keep working. When I think why can't I run faster, I try to be thankful that I'm out there trying.

 

Anyway, I just wanted to write and say that you give and achieve more than you realize.

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Hmmmm, throwing in my few cents worth that 'perspective' is key.

 

If you see yourself as 'average' in the midst of the marathon running, good mom's, mostly staying on top of life . . . then perhaps average is exactly where you want to be?!?! Marathon Mama's are something else, you know -- a breed of their own and not to be compared with the Regular Jo's!!

 

If you stretch your perspective to see a larger spectrum, I suspect your proclaimed average grade, which your fellow hivers have upgraded to a B+ grade, would soar to a BIG FAT "A". Contentment is such a personal journey of self-acceptance and self-care.

 

Coming from a "used-to-be-a-runner" to a woman who has gotten on and off the wagon more times than I can count, I see you as inspirational, steady, and altogether lovely.

 

Warmly, T

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You are special to God. He made you. He died for you. And he has a plan especially for you. That plan may not be a razzle-dazzle one to the world, but it is an eternal plan.

 

(I also vote for PMS).

 

 

Dits. I like being average. Average means no financial problems, terminally ill children or heartbreaking situations. Average is good.

 

And what's to stop you from being above average in something you want to pursue? Get off your butt and do it.

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I run. I even run marathons. But I'm slow. I'm barely in the middle of the group. I do triathlons.

 

WOW!

 

I can't even run down my driveway! My husband competes in tri's and I am always in AWE of the women who also compete. I'm not talking about the ultra-fit, muscled, athletic machines either - I'm talking about the every-day average woman who has gotten her rear in gear and has the courage to compete. They are my heroes because they have set out to do something that looks like is way out of their comfort zone.

 

So kudo's to you - you are amazing!! :hurray::hurray::hurray:

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