Balancing everything ... lack of time, etc.

[Luanne]

I don't see how the people with multiple children do it all... I mean fit everything in and still hopefully have time to breathe sometimes. I am trying to balance educating myself, spending time with my daughter, taking care of our house, and working. I have to work. I am single and it isn't optional. I usually only work about 30 hours a week too. I'm one of those people who has to get 8 hours of sleep every night too or I just can't function during the day.

 

How do you all find time to do what you need to do and still have time to relax at least a little bit? Maybe I am asking too much or just need better organization. I don't know.

[Amy in Orlando]

I don't see how the people with multiple children do it all... I mean fit everything in and still hopefully have time to breathe sometimes. I am trying to balance educating myself, spending time with my daughter, taking care of our house, and working. I have to work. I am single and it isn't optional. I usually only work about 30 hours a week too. I'm one of those people who has to get 8 hours of sleep every night too or I just can't function during the day.

 

How do you all find time to do what you need to do and still have time to relax at least a little bit? Maybe I am asking too much or just need better organization. I don't know.

 

 

I have four kids and I don't work (officially). I do have a side business that I spend about 50 hours a week on most of the year. How old is your daughter?

 

I think sleep should be a priority. Mark those eight hours off of your days. Have you tried FlyLady as far as the house goes? You don't need to do the emails or every single thing she says, but her philosophy is very workable when time is an issue. I think that alone would allow you time to relax and just hang out with your daughter a bit.

 

I'm sure you'll get a lot of good answers here, but FlyLady would be my suggestion on where to start, she covers everything. And, I love her concept of "babysteps."

[Whisperlily]

First of all, breathe. :)

 

You don't have to do everything tomorrow. Life goes in stages, and phases. It has bends and turns, twists, and it can sure throw you for a loop sometimes.

 

Focus on what is important *today* first. Analyze your to-do list. Is there something that could easily be moved to a little later date? What is it that's causing you the most stress?

 

When I get behind in housework, sometimes I take a week (or two if necessary) where I allow a much bigger chunk of time than usual each day to get that "monkey off my back" so I can breathe again. If you need to put your assigned reading off a bit, do it! (unless it's a scheduled class). If it's lack of time with your daughter, take a week or two to schedule *more time than usual* for bonding, or activities, or whatever helps.

 

Fill your reserves in these areas, but only fill them one at a time. You can't spend more time on housework, allot a lot of *extra* time with your daughter, and increase your expectations of self-education, work and everything that goes along with it all at the same time without burning out.

 

If you need to take some time for yourself to just *breathe* first, do it! Allow yourself permission to take a break, to fill your reserves. If you do well with seeing things on paper so you know what's coming next, making a time management plan might help. I know that it can be stressful for me to do it that way, so I think in broader, more general terms. A general list works for me.

 

Mentally I can tell "stress issue #2" to wait, because I'll get to it in a week after "stress issue #1" has been given some attention. I know I'll get to it, so it helps quiet my mind about that worry.

 

Most of all, if there's something that you're trying to do that can wait a year or two... let it wait. There are a lot of things on my list right now that I feel are very important, but they have to wait because I just can't do them. There are others that have come up on the list that I am *able* to do that I wasn't before.

 

Give yourself time. Enjoy the journey.

[Laura Corin]

Have you tried FlyLady as far as the house goes? You don't need to do the emails or every single thing she says, but her philosophy is very workable when time is an issue.

 

Just agreeing with the suggestion of Flylady. I don't receive the emails, but I had a good read on her website and picked up two things: tidy (new tidying/decluttering) for fifteen minutes a day; pick up the house as an evening routine. I've been doing that for around two weeks now, and I can't tell you the difference it has made to the look of the house and my frustration levels.

 

Best wishes

 

Laura

[Renee in NC]

I have a schedule for me, and a separate schedule (looser) for the dc. I have 6dc and I am at work 40-50 hours per week. I spend some of that time homeschooling, though. My housework is scheduled by Motivated Moms and I *have* to have a meal plan or things get stressful. Having said that, I am starting the week unprepared, so I will be running to catch up until Sunday!

[Joanne]

I've been an income producing, single mom homeschooler. One thing to remember is that "life" would be challenging, regardless, at this point.

 

Maybe we can help more if you offer some specifics about your schedule, educational goals, curriculum, etc?

[G5052]

I work almost full-time part of the year, and DH is disabled.

 

I've dropped many activities that were nice, but not "must-haves," both for me and the children. Everything I do is bare-bones as much as possible. And I also revamped my curriculum several years ago to more indepedent, no-planning resources. And my children help me clean for an hour a day. A sink cleaned by an 8 y.o. is always better than a dirty sink. I don't try to do it all myself.

 

I figure that this is a time of heavy investment in child-rearing, and sometime later I'll have time for me. :)

[Guest Virginia Dawn]

For me it was deciding what was essential, then having a relaxed attitude about the rest, otherwise I turned into a monster control-freak.

 

Essentials in our house: church, work, school, laundry, meals.

 

Next comes social obligations like sports teams and Civil Air patrol. I tend to limit these because it is easy to get overwhelmed if you are never at home.

 

Things that help: Cleaning as you go, especially in the kitchen and bathroom. Routine repetitive tasks, like always shopping on the same day each week, or always performing certain chores at the same time everyday. Enlisting the help of the children and working together. Limiting social extras like birthday parties or other invitations to one event a week, politely decline the rest. Letting yourself quit "doing" at a certain time every day, for me it is 9 p.m.

 

Things that hinder: Too much time on the computer or television. Talking on the telephone (but you can do some tasks with a phone in one hand :-) Too many outside activities. Getting sidetracked (my big problem)

[Camy-7 boybarians 1 lady]

AArrghh! I can hear the frustration in your post, and I commiserate with you!

 

I have 7 children, and I am tired most of the time. It is very difficult to raise a family, keep a home, and homeschool. Adding work outside the home would make it even more challenging. May the Lord give you grace!

 

All of the organization in the world sometimes doesn't "give" you the energy and patience you need. Sometimes it's just trouncing through and keeping going. It is not easy.

 

If you could keep your life as simple as possible, that would help. Cooking, cleaning, etc. Just keep it simple. I think sleep is a priority as well as exercise and fresh air. The relationship with your children is right up there, too. This tends to suffer when mom is out of sorts (just ask me, I'll tell ya). Don't forget this time with you children! They need their momma.

 

Well, I wish I had better advice, but that's all I could come up with.

 

I pray you will find encouragement.

 

Blessings,

 

Camy

marymarthame.blogspot.com

[fruitful vine]

AArrghh! I can hear the frustration in your post, and I commiserate with you!

 

I have 7 children, and I am tired most of the time. It is very difficult to raise a family, keep a home, and homeschool. Adding work outside the home would make it even more challenging. May the Lord give you grace!

 

All of the organization in the world sometimes doesn't "give" you the energy and patience you need. Sometimes it's just trouncing through and keeping going. It is not easy.

 

If you could keep your life as simple as possible, that would help. Cooking, cleaning, etc. Just keep it simple. I think sleep is a priority as well as exercise and fresh air. The relationship with your children is right up there, too. This tends to suffer when mom is out of sorts (just ask me, I'll tell ya). Don't forget this time with you children! They need their momma.

 

Well, I wish I had better advice, but that's all I could come up with.

 

I pray you will find encouragement.

 

Blessings,

 

Camy

marymarthame.blogspot.com

 

:iagree:

I'm expecting my 8th child in Aug. and Camy has put it well.

Focus in the important things.

Yes, it's hard to do. It's very hard to do.

I just wish I would have learned that sooner!

 

Good luck!