Home'scool Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 Ready? If you child does not want to try out for a competitive sport, DON'T FORCE THEM! They will just spend the whole time complaining how they don't want to be there. If you DO force your child and they get on the team, MAKE SURE THEY AREN'T COMPLAINING ABOUT BEING THERE! It is just a drag to everyone else who wants to be there. If it is 100 degrees out, tell your kid to suck it up! You allowed your kid to try out for a SUMMER softball team. They play IN THE SUMMER. They play ON FIELDS WITH NO SHADE. These facts should not come as a surprise and should not be a reason for whining. Don't like it? Don't try out. 50 girls tried out for 12 spots. If you child is taking a spot, have them respect that. TEACH THEM THAT. Teach them that it doesn't suck when it is 100 degrees out and they are playing their 4th game of the day in a tournament and they are they are hot and sweaty and tired. What sucks is trying out for a spot and not getting on the team. If your child gets on a competitive sports team, make sure you BRING THEM TO ALL PRACTICES. The fact that it is nice out and they want to go to the beach/pool/lake does not mean they can blow off practice. It just makes it stink for everyone else who does show up. The team cannot practice drills without everyone there. If you do actually attend practices, don't show up 15 minutes late with you and your child holding coffee coolatas from Dunkin Donuts. Be organized, get to practice on time and only go to the drivethru if you have time. If your child is a sore-sport, DON'T HAVE THEM PLAY ON A COMPETITIVE TEAM! If they cry for 15 minutes when they strike out, if they huff and refuse to try when they are playing a position they don't like, if they refuse to talk to their teammates when they get called out at a base -- take them home. Take yourself home. No one wants you there. If your child yells at you to "shut up!" from the middle of the field, at least have the self-respect to be embarrassed that you raised such a brat. Don't laugh it off. Take a parenting class. Make sure your child is NOT texting during a game. It is obnoxious. Make sure your child is NOT socializing with every Tom Dick or Harry that comes by the bench. They should be focused on the game. If the team is playing in a tournament and you hear your child wishing that the team loses so she can go home and go to the beach/pool/lake, then TAKE THEM HOME. And yourself. If you child runs up to you during a tournament and demands a slushie/ice cream/candy from the concession stand, DON'T GET THEM ONE! Wait until after the game. If you do actually have the backbone to say no and they whine at you and stomp off and pout on the bench, GO HOME. In conclusion, BE A PARENT! Manage your kids. Be responsible. Stop thinking it is okay because it is not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snickerdoodle Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 What age group are we talking about here? Sounds like the summer has not got off to a good start. Perhaps there is some confusion between fun summer activity and competitive training. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home'scool Posted July 14, 2009 Author Share Posted July 14, 2009 The team is for 13 yo girls. At tryouts the coach explained that this was for a travel, competitive team. That we would be having 2 games and week and 1 practice a week. That we would be in 4 tournaments that run all weekend. The rec league is for "fun", but the travel team is definitely competitive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
linders Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 I just erased a ranting response involving last night's swim meet, but decided those details don't matter. If a child truly wants to participate (not just to please parents) and understands what will be required, let them play. Otherwise, keep them home. I know that every player will face challenges and get tired/frustrated at some point and the parent should be there to help them work through those issues before quitting, but if there is a persistent pattern of complaining or anxiety, what are they learning by staying? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katemary63 Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 Sounds reasonable to me! I don't understand AT ALL someone who would join a competitive team and not fully and properly participate. Anyone in our family would feel SO obligated to the other's on the team that we would do our best at all times. We LOVE sports here, but hate the heat and so - We DON'T do anything that runs in July or Aug. Period. Not even horseback riding which is our passion. We just don't enjoy being out in 100 degrees and humidity so we don't. That does mean that we miss out on some things that others enjoy - but that is life. Full of choices. So, if the kid can't take it, don't do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jujsky Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 Wow! Was this all from one family, or behavior you noticed from different kids/parents? At any rate, it sounds like the parents are at fault here more than the kids. I can't stand pushy parents -- especially the type that you mentioned that pushes their kids to try out for a team they don't want to be on. My dad did that to me and I was miserable :sad: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plansrme Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 If your child is a sore-sport' date=' DON'T HAVE THEM PLAY ON A COMPETITIVE TEAM! If they cry for 15 minutes when they strike out, if they huff and refuse to try when they are playing a position they don't like, if they refuse to talk to their teammates when they get called out at a base -- take them home. Take yourself home. No one wants you there.[/quote'] Couldn't agree more. One of my daughters is a gymnast, and there's a "no crying on the floor" rule during competitions. If you cry, you're supposed to leave the competition floor and go to the bathroom. I never understood the point of this rule until I saw a girl cry after getting oh, maybe a 9.1 on bars, when she was used to doing better. Her crying made her the center of attention, when the team and coaches should have been focused on the girl who was competing after her, and it also was insulting for girls who don't usually do well on bars, who would have been thrilled with a 9.1. Sorry softball has been such a negative experience. Though of course there are many exceptions, as a whole, I find that I don't really care much for O.P.C.s (Other People's Children), and experiences like yours just serve to reinforce that attitude. Terri Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
asta Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 Amen Sister! (former soccer mom) a Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home'scool Posted July 14, 2009 Author Share Posted July 14, 2009 Unfortunately the behavior is spread out among a few of the girls. I think it is the type of thing where once one starts doing it and gets away with it, others start following. I also think the coach did not start it the way he wanted to finish it. He just is not stepping up and fixing all of this, but I also get the impression he is just sick of it all. I keep hearing parents *****ing him out because their daughter isn't playing the position she would like or he was too rough on her or whatever. If I was him I would be sick of it too. I am going to suggest, though, that he has a parent's meeting to try and sort some of this out. We have 2 weeks left on the season and 3 more tournaments to get through. I see it mostly as a parenting issue, though. Just like teachers should not have to deal with behavioral issues in the school, coaches should not have to deal with these issues on the field. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyof4ks Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 Yep. :iagree: This is precisely why my kids are not in competitive sports lol. None of my kids are that competitive. I agree that people like my kids should not be there, but if they choose to be they should do their very best and be respectful of the rules and circumstances surrounding their decision. Hopefully the rest of the summer goes better! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted July 15, 2009 Share Posted July 15, 2009 Agree completely. We don't do select baseball because we can't honor the commitment (and budget issues). We do competitive Fall and Spring baseball and see similar issues every season. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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