jplain Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 I thought a poll might be helpful, since some may wish to be anonymous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jplain Posted July 2, 2009 Author Share Posted July 2, 2009 bump to the top Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 Ds14 got a swat or two over his life, but it was situations like running away from me in a parking lot. He is a rule follower, and wants nothing to do with trouble. Dd10 got a few more swats, she is the type of person who will get 'stuck' crying, and she will cry hysterically for over an hour, not being able to stop. It could be something as simple as coming inside from playing at 8pm. Most of her swats, were to get her over hump, and actually help her stop crying. If she got a swat on the butt, she would stop crying in just a few minutes. It was hard to figure that out! She doesn't have this problem anymore, it stopped when she was about 4yo, and she got better at controlling her emotions. He doctor suggested that it was a central nervous system issue (her getting stuck in a loop) and she matured out of it. She needs to know every.single.boundary of our rules. If we give her a rule, she has to sit and talk about multiple scenarios that both fit and don't fit the rule. ie If I told her that she has a neighborhood boundary of the fence line, she would ask questions like "if the neighborhood was on fire, can I go further that the fence line"....um, yeah. :lol: Dd2 needs a much firmer hand. Typical time outs only work part of the time. She has been in behavior therapy and is still in OT. She is the type of kid who willfully tests every rule. She will look us dead in the eye, and do something that she was just told not to do. She gets swats, over the diaper. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jplain Posted July 2, 2009 Author Share Posted July 2, 2009 bumping up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jplain Posted July 2, 2009 Author Share Posted July 2, 2009 up UP UP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jplain Posted July 2, 2009 Author Share Posted July 2, 2009 one last bump! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TracyR Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 I have used it as a form of punishment. BUT.... it was for times when my children tried running out into the road. I'd rather tap their bottom then ever have them get hit by a car. I have rarely ever had to spank my children , ever. Combining all 4 of my girls I can count those instances on one hand. Most of the time its either time outs or we talk about it. My youngest is the lucky one. She was born with bottom and spinal issues so we are just afraid to spank. I just hold her or sit her on the couch when she is being naughty. I don't know. I just don't feel the need to spank really. Not to sound proud but my girls really don't give me a reason to be angry at them all to often. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigMamaBird Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 I voted yes. And I don't feel the need to be anonymous. If I'm uneasy talking about something I do, or doing it in public, I shouldn't be doing it. We only spank for outright, rebellious disobedience or safety issues, like running into a parking lot. And yes, I will and have spanked in public. The only reaction from others I've gotten are smiles and knowing nods. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 Where's the obligatory other? I only slap my daughter when she slaps me. 99% of the time it's an automatic reaction though, and I wouldn't do it if I got more sleep. I feel lousy about it, but I'm afraid autopilot takes over. Rosie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ekarl2 Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 I've come to find out that "spanking" means different things to different people. Now, mine are young, so you can label me inexperienced. I've certainly had to swat the diapered hiney to train my kids, my son especially. But my dd RARELY gets swatted anymore because: 1. she's a pleaser and 2. she can be spoken to and spoken with. If you consider those swats or pops to be spanking then, yes, I do. But I only do it at the MOMENT of infraction. That makes sense to me. I want to make an emotional "ouch, that hurts" connection between the thing that's wrong and the consequence for doing it. I seriously doubt I'll ever be in the camp of, "you just did something very wrong. Go up to your room and I'll be up in a minute to spank you." I don't have a problem if others do it, really I don't. It's just not my style. I guess my point is, I don't know if I'd be considered a spanker or not!:tongue_smilie:(I voted yes, though) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elizabeth Conley Posted July 4, 2009 Share Posted July 4, 2009 (edited) If you consider those swats or pops to be spanking then, yes, I do. But I only do it at the MOMENT of infraction. That makes sense to me. I want to make an emotional "ouch, that hurts" connection between the thing that's wrong and the consequence for doing it. I seriously doubt I'll ever be in the camp of, "you just did something very wrong. Go up to your room and I'll be up in a minute to spank you." I don't have a problem if others do it, really I don't. It's just not my style. Precisely! I only spanked to assure that the dangerous behavior the child was engaged in was unlikely to ever be repeated. I didn't wrap the event in lectures or PC psycho-drivel. I immediately smacked the child's bottom three times briskly, as I said "Do not ever ____! Always ____!" Later when it was convenient, I checked for understanding. I asked the child what s/he should never do, and what appropriate behavior was to be substituted for the dangerous behavior. As long as s/he got the message, the topic was closed. All this melodrama about parental anger and permanent emotional scarring of the child is absolutely irrelevant. There are hazards in the world young children simply don't comprehend. Thankfully, most young children do understand a spanking. It's most effective if it's administered immediately, and accompanied with a clarifying directive. Edited July 5, 2009 by Elizabeth Conley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radish4ever Posted July 4, 2009 Share Posted July 4, 2009 We spank, but it happens rarely and after at least 2-3 warnings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tree House Academy Posted July 4, 2009 Share Posted July 4, 2009 We have and do spank...but it is not our only nor most used form of discipline. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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