May I be judgemental and make a trivial vent?

[MrsMe]

I watch HGTV when I get ready in the morning. I just have to say, "where the heck do these kids (20's early 30's) get the money for a $400,000 3000+ sq ft home in addition to all brand new furniture to furnish it? This seems to be the norm! 3 bedrooms are too small and so is 2500 sq ft. For a newly wed couple! Then, (GASP) the counters are new and the appliances are white (new as well), but they have to redo it, because they must have granite and stainless steel! Then they have a walk-in closet, decked out with shelving and drawers and it's only hers!!!! "Oh honey, you have to put your stuff somewhere else. There's no room for yours!" And, "this tub doesn't have jets".

 

Are you kidding me? Is this what the world has become? I'm sorry, but this disgusts me. And it seems to be the norm?

 

Happy with no debt and probably the only person who likes a cozy home.

[Impish]

Tell me about it. :glare: I refuse to even watch shows like that, because I get incredibly depressed. I'm praying nightly to get a home on an acreage, the one I have my eye on was built in 1929, is 3 bdrms and 1400 sq ft...and would be a miracle, a blessing, EVERYTHING our family ever dreamed of all in one. And these twits whine about the colour of appliances? :banghead:

[gingersmom]

And thus why people are losing their homes to foreclosure.

 

It amazes me also. What happened to working and saving and when you can afford it move up to a bigger home.

 

Their seems to be a sense of entitlement these days. I'm not sure where it stems from.

 

I tell my children all the time to start with an apartment and then buy a small home and keep upgrading from there.

[elegantlion]

Yeah, that's one of the reasons I quit watching HGTV. :glare:

[kah]

I've noticed the date on those shows is usually at least 2 years ago. The newer shows are, "help, my house won't sell" and "help me fix up the basement so I can rent it out and get a little extra income."

:lol:

[LaxMom]

You're not the only one... I often wonder if these shows are part of the cause or the effect of a new generation of "kids" with such a grandiose sense of entitlement. One thing is for sure, they seem to be the first to feel some sort of "right" to continue or surpass the lifestyle their parents worked years to achieve, as soon as they fledge.

[KidsHappen]

It's not the norm in America, just frequent on HGTV. My guess is that they manage it with extreme debt.

 

On the other hand, my dd got an amazing deal on her house. It is a three year old, five bedroom, three bath, approximately 3300 sq. ft house and they got it for $130,000 because it was a foreclosure. The kitchen has granite counter tops, upgraded appliances and counters, an island. Their payment is the same as their rent was. It is in a new subdivision where they are still building. It has a park, playground, community center and swimming pool. It is way more house than they need but it was a great deal and they have plenty of room to grow and will never need to move. Also based on the appraisal they already have about $50,000 equity. And their interest rate is 5%.

[LaxMom]

It's not the norm in America, just frequent on HGTV. My guess is that they manage it with extreme debt.

 

On the other hand, my dd got an amazing deal on her house. It is a three year old, five bedroom, three bath, approximately 3300 sq. ft house and they got it for $130,000 because it was a foreclosure. The kitchen has granite counter tops, upgraded appliances and counters, an island. Their payment is the same as their rent was. It is in a new subdivision where they are still building. It has a park, playground, community center and swimming pool. It is way more house than they need but it was a great deal and they have plenty of room to grow and will never need to move. Also based on the appraisal they already have about $50,000 equity. And their interest rate is 5%.

 

Maybe it's the one on alilac's show this morning. :D

[kah]

You're not the only one... I often wonder if these shows are part of the cause or the effect of a new generation of "kids" with such a grandiose sense of entitlement. One thing is for sure, they seem to be the first to feel some sort of "right" to continue or surpass the lifestyle their parents worked years to achieve, as soon as they fledge.

 

Interesting- my mom used to talk about the baby boomers (in the hippy days) going off to college with their stereo and all their stuff, and condemning their parents' materialism.

[Aurelia]

The sense of entitlement thing seems to be fairly mainstream (and one of the reasons I homeschool my child :tongue_smilie:), so it really doesn't surprise me. It's completely ridiculous, IMO, how people like this think the world revolves around them, but it's likely how they were raised. :glare:

[Ravin]

This is why I mostly watch Planet Green when I'm in the mood for home improvement type shows. Check out Living with Ed sometime. :D At least when people are spending a lot of money on that show, it's to do something good for the environment, not just unconscious consumerism.

[Impish]

It's not the norm in America, just frequent on HGTV. My guess is that they manage it with extreme debt.

 

On the other hand, my dd got an amazing deal on her house. It is a three year old, five bedroom, three bath, approximately 3300 sq. ft house and they got it for $130,000 because it was a foreclosure. The kitchen has granite counter tops, upgraded appliances and counters, an island. Their payment is the same as their rent was. It is in a new subdivision where they are still building. It has a park, playground, community center and swimming pool. It is way more house than they need but it was a great deal and they have plenty of room to grow and will never need to move. Also based on the appraisal they already have about $50,000 equity. And their interest rate is 5%.

Yeah, the place I want is 35k more. And an acreage. I couldn't get a freakin CONDO in the city where I live for what they're asking for the acreage :blink:

[Satori]

My husband and I worked very hard for our educations (both came from poor-to-middle-class families), and then enjoyed the amazing dot com boom. We were able to do that (big house the year we were married), and bought everything with cash, no debt. Maybe they got jobs in the right fields?

 

However, now we're in our mid-30's, and the economy is bad. We've taken many conservative measures, valuing stability over the high-payout of risk, and now I'm trying to live frugally. I think we'd be better off with a smaller house, but we will just have to be careful the next few years.

 

I can't believe the way I used to think just a few years ago, now the focus is learning how to spread my weekly pay to buy homeschooling supplies yet have enough left over for groceries and gas. Ugh.

[Guest Alte Veste Academy]

And thus why people are losing their homes to foreclosure.

 

It amazes me also. What happened to working and saving and when you can afford it move up to a bigger home.

 

Their seems to be a sense of entitlement these days. I'm not sure where it stems from.

 

I tell my children all the time to start with an apartment and then buy a small home and keep upgrading from there.

 

Yes, and one thing that gets me EVERY time is when you have this newlywed couple where both parents are working in white collar jobs, so they're making good money. They say their price range is $xxx,xxx but that's based on their max ability with them both working full time jobs. Then they end up buying a house that is way more than their budget. Every single time, I think, "Great, people! You just priced yourself out of being able to stay at home with your babies when you start your family." They're being awfully short-sighted, I think.

[battlemaiden]

I watch HGTV when I get ready in the morning. I just have to say, "where the heck do these kids (20's early 30's) get the money for a $400,000 3000+ sq ft home in addition to all brand new furniture to furnish it? This seems to be the norm! 3 bedrooms are too small and so is 2500 sq ft. For a newly wed couple! Then, (GASP) the counters are new and the appliances are white (new as well), but they have to redo it, because they must have granite and stainless steel! Then they have a walk-in closet, decked out with shelving and drawers and it's only hers!!!! "Oh honey, you have to put your stuff somewhere else. There's no room for yours!" And, "this tub doesn't have jets".

 

Are you kidding me? Is this what the world has become? I'm sorry, but this disgusts me. And it seems to be the norm?

 

Happy with no debt and probably the only person who likes a cozy home.

 

Get the heck out! I never watch HGTV but for some reason (it is the channel below the food network) my dh and I saw this episode this weekend and we were shocked! We both were apalled at those snot nosed little twirps! And then we thought they chose badly. :D

 

We kept saying, "$400,000 is a good price?" And that guy with his workout needs, and the pool water feature was sooooo important? Pish posh! We think they must have family money. :glare::glare::glare:

 

Jo

 

I can't believe you posted about this.

[NoPlaceLikeHome]

My dh and I have a theory that many of these people live with smoke and mirrors;) I think that many must be financed up to the gills. We do fairly well and would be hard pressed to afford that kind of expense. I have also come to the conclusion that even if we were rich, I would want to upgrade our house, but not with the kind from HGTV:) I would want a house that could accomadate our extended family with a bigger yard:)

[Scuff]

It's not the norm in America, just frequent on HGTV. My guess is that they manage it with extreme debt.

 

 

Yup

[ladydusk]

HGTV

 

I enjoy watching HGTV as much as (or probably more than) the next person. But, I also call it "the coveting channel" and try to keep as my perspective the whole channel as pretty ridiculous.

[lilbean05]

My husband and I built/bought our first house, ready for us to move into as soon as we were married. It was 4bd, 3 ba, 3800sq with an unfinished basement on 3/4 of an acre. We were both 23 years old when we were married, my husband turning 24 on our honeymoon. We did not choose many upgrades when we were building the house because we calculated that it was much less expensive to do the work ourselves (and in the case of granite, hire someone to help) post-builder stage. We did many upgrades after the fact and the house was quite beautiful. While the house was large for a very young, newly married couple, we had plans to start a family young (which we did) and now, 5 years later, our 3rd is due in a few months.

 

I seem to fit right into the catagory of people you are talking about, however, we most certainly do not feel like we were entitled to anything. We worked hard to get to where we were. Both of our parents were in the military, so we didn't grow up with anything fancy. We busted our tushes in highschool, without allowances, without cushy houses, but with our parents encouraging us to work hard. And we did. We both got scholarships which paid for our college degrees at very good schools, leaving us with no college debt. We both graduated well at our schools, giving us opprotunity for employment upon college graduation. We were both working when we met and when we got married, each of us living in an apartment (one of us with roommates to defray the costs, even though it wasn't necessary). We had one car payment between the two of us and that was the only debt we carried. No credit card debt, no car payment, and about 30% of our income going into an IRA of some sorts. My point is, we worked hard. Very hard. We got married and saw that we could afford a large house which would allow us to have our *hopefully* large family. So we took on a mortgage. After my daughter was born and having her in daycare for a few months, we decided it was best for our family if I stopped working to take care of our children. We lost half our income by making this change, and it was a bit of a shift fo adjust to our new income, but we did it. We don't hire babysitters, we go out to dinner maybe once every few months with our kids, we don't go to the movies (we went to the drive in a few weeks ago--fun!), and we don't fill our life with anything we feel we don't need or reasonably enjoy.

 

So, while I do not take any offense to your annoyance with the folks on HGTV, I hope you can see that not all of us are living beyond our means, are irresponsible, or think that we have some strange sense of entitlement. Some of us worked, and still work, very hard to get to where we are.

[Kathy in MD]

I watch HGTV when I get ready in the morning. I just have to say, "where the heck do these kids (20's early 30's) get the money for a $400,000 3000+ sq ft home in addition to all brand new furniture to furnish it? This seems to be the norm! 3 bedrooms are too small and so is 2500 sq ft. For a newly wed couple! Then, (GASP) the counters are new and the appliances are white (new as well), but they have to redo it, because they must have granite and stainless steel! Then they have a walk-in closet, decked out with shelving and drawers and it's only hers!!!! "Oh honey, you have to put your stuff somewhere else. There's no room for yours!" And, "this tub doesn't have jets".

 

Are you kidding me? Is this what the world has become? I'm sorry, but this disgusts me. And it seems to be the norm?

 

Happy with no debt and probably the only person who likes a cozy home.

 

Where are they living? A couple of years ago, they would have had to pay that for our 40 yo townhouse well away from the center of any night life -- and the neighborhood was going downhill.

 

Plus if the two of them were in the right fields, they could easily have afforded our house.

[MrsMe]

Maybe it's the one on alilac's show this morning. :D

 

 

Nope...this one cost $400,000.:eek:

[MrsMe]

A real annoyance to me is the women who need the entire walk-in closet for their clothing and proceed to tell their husbands that they can use the closet in the "other" room for their clothing. Sheesh. That's a thorn in my side. Good grief!

[asta]

Interesting- my mom used to talk about the baby boomers (in the hippy days) going off to college with their stereo and all their stuff, and condemning their parents' materialism.

 

Yeah, and then a lot of those same boomers put career before family, and waited until their 40s to have kids.

 

I have a HUGE rant about how these same people voted down all the school bond initiatives when I was a kid (my mom is a generation before them), and then cried foul when, finally getting around to having their own kids, they discovered there were no decent schools.

 

And then there is the whole "we must have 2 people, each making 75k+ a year to even survive" attitude. Which is how jr. ends up in daycare at 2 weeks old. And then the parents wonder why jr. (and his generation) can't stop getting ear infections and every other weird thing.

 

So, yeah - some people really could afford to buy overpriced houses for cash. But at what cost?

 

(can you tell that this subject irks me?)

 

a

[MrsMe]

So, while I do not take any offense to your annoyance with the folks on HGTV, I hope you can see that not all of us are living beyond our means, are irresponsible, or think that we have some strange sense of entitlement. Some of us worked, and still work, very hard to get to where we are.

 

Nope I don't at all. And even so you still didn't have everything, you worked for it, and did some yourselves and waited for some things. The problem is it seems to be the norm with young kids. I mean really the entire house is completely furnished! Brand new! Where else can you really go, but down?

 

But it's really the attitude that bugs me. She has to have the entire walk-in closet. He has to go somewhere else. New appliances aren't good enough because they're white. Man I'd spend that extra money on the downpayment!

[elegantlion]

I enjoy watching HGTV as much as (or probably more than) the next person. But, I also call it "the coveting channel" and try to keep as my perspective the whole channel as pretty ridiculous.

 

:lol::lol: I love it, the coveting channel. I haven't weaned myself off of House Hunters International yet. A couple of weeks ago they were in a town in Costa Rica that dh and I vacationed near. There was more than a twinge of the green monster near me during that show.

[Satori]

I could've written almost your exact post gray9965! I'll elaborate a bit more, just want to reconfirm that it is possible with hard work, have no debt, not act incredibly spoiled, still have family values and be happy, all before you hit 40.

 

I got straight A's in school, and was able to get through college with lots of scholarships. My husband came from a single-mom family so poor he had to sleep in a drawer shelf when he was a baby! We both got multiple college degrees and valued education. So we never felt entitled or spoiled but boy did we work HARD.

 

I did not want to start a family until I was financially stable. Once I had the stable career, I found my soulmate and husband, looking for someone who valued education and family.

 

DH doesn't believe in debt, and paid off our college debt right away (that wasn't covered by scholarships). We very rarely buy someone big on credit, and then make a plan to pay it off quickly.

 

When looking for a home, we originally wanted a 3-4 kid family, so we bought a large home in a city. Had our daughter and I planned to be a SAHM, but I got stuck with a brilliant idea and went with it for the next 4 years (so I became a WAHM). It helped us move a few years ago to our dream home in the mountains where such very large homes are not as expensive as living in a city. I made tons of donations to needy causes. Gave away lots of free stuff to families in need. (still do)

 

I really wanted to be just a mom though, so last year I sold my business and now I'm homeschooling my daughter and hopefully more future children. So we're living more frugally on one income.

 

I don't care about being fancy and showing off, we do try to buy quality so it lasts. I don't watch shows like HGTV at all, don't watch much tv come to think of it.

Edited July 1, 2009 by Satori

[jujsky]

Those shows bug me too, and I also usually think they make the wrong choices. I agree with everyone here who says that in many cases, they're financed up the ying-yang in order to afford those homes. I know when DH and I bought our home (9 years ago in August) as young newlyweds (early 20's, married 1 year) we had a budget in mind of what we could afford/month. We were approved for soooooooooo much more that it was crazy! Yes, we could have afforded the top of our range if we got rid of one of the cars, had no heat or electricity, and our diet consisted exclusively of Ramen noodles. Oh, and if I stayed working forever instead of staying home when we had a family -- which we already had mentally factored into our calculations. I think in a lot of cases, people go in not knowing what they can afford, so they let the bank tell them some high amount and go with that. With other people, I think they go in with a budget in mind, get approved for way more, and have a hard time resisting these big, glorious homes that are dangled in front of their faces.

 

What did we do? We looked at houses in and just a little bit above the price range we felt comfortable affording. We ended up with a house that was about $15,000 more than we were 100% comfortable with, but there was a lot of logic in our choice. We knew we could buy a smaller house and move again in 5 years, or this larger house that needed some TLC, and we'd never have to move -- unless we wanted to. Buying the bigger, slightly more expensive, fixer-upper was a much better long-term investment than a smaller, less expensive house. On top of that, we've been able to make this house what we wanted. We're still working on it, but there is a day and night difference between what it was 9 years ago, and what it is today!

[Rebecca VA]

HGTV was one of the few American channels we got when we lived in Guam 12 years ago. It was almost painful to sit in our little Navy house (which was actually very cute) out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean and see the stunning homes and gardens that people had back in the U.S.

 

We used to call it "The Envy and Discontent Channel" because that's the effect it had on us. We were better off when we didn't watch it.

[lilbean05]

HGTV was one of the few American channels we got when we lived in Guam 12 years ago. It was almost painful to sit in our little Navy house (which was actually very cute) out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean and see the stunning homes and gardens that people had back in the U.S.

 

We used to call it "The Envy and Discontent Channel" because that's the effect it had on us. We were better off when we didn't watch it.

 

I lived in Iwakuni around the same time, in little Marine Corps base housing. We actually went to Guam for our senior high class trip and loved it there! But I agree--base housing is small. Fun to figure out how to decorate and get things to work the way you want, but small! :)

[mommaduck]

Okay, I would take a little concrete house in Guam over a "paper doll-house" mansion in the US any day. I miss Guam :(

[kah]

Where are they living? A couple of years ago, they would have had to pay that for our 40 yo townhouse well away from the center of any night life -- and the neighborhood was going downhill.

 

Plus if the two of them were in the right fields, they could easily have afforded our house.

 

I think the location is part of it- many of them seem to be in California, probably b/c it's close to whatever TV studio produces the show. (Just guessing.)

[Dirtroad]

I quit watching HGTV b/c I found myself resenting others or being jealous.... why can't I have a waterfall in my bathroom .... or why can't I have a 5 bedroom home with an atrium and warmed floors.... G.A.G.

 

I call it coveting.... but regardless of the term... it was making me feel inferior and like I was not doing something and should be ashamed that I didn't have all that STUFF.

 

I understand your posts! Turn it off!

[sixpence1978]

I can see your point about entitlement. However, I also must state that not every young couple living in a huge house is living in extreme debt or putting their careers first.

 

My DH and I are 30 years old and living in a house that is over 400K and about 3000 sqft. We have hardwood and granite and stainless steel because it was a new construction and that is what was put in. We managed to buy our first house cheap right after we got married, right after college. Then we sold it (in California) right around the time of the housing boom. I never worked but my DH would still put extra toward our equity each month. Our only debt currently is our mortgage (which is under 150K).

 

I homeschool, and don't work. Most of our furniture is hand-me-down and we are notorious bargain hunters and do all of our home improvement ourselves. Yes, compared to all our neighbors, the inside of our house isn't decked out to the max, but it is nice and comfortable. Occasionally it's hard to not compare and to feel like I have to keep up with the Joneses, but not having mass amounts of debt is more important to us than having a complete, matching bedroom set. My DH takes up more of the walk-in closet than I do.

 

I do agree that the people who have no regard for debt and just "want it all" are really annoying, but you can't always judge a book by it's cover. Some of us are just lucky :001_smile:

[TwinMominTX]

I think it is rather judgemental. You really can't tell much about this couple by watching 30 minutes of an edited television show on a home and gardening channel. You don't know if this couple has a trust fund of $1,000,000,000 or if they both have jobs as senior partners in a huge multinational law firm. You don't know if they give 87% of their income to charity or plan on purchasing the home and then filling it with 15 adopted children from third world countries.

[the4Rs]

This is becoming more normal. My husband's parents and mine get frustrated with our generation and younger because they had to work their whole lives to get where they are and then their kids come up and think "I have to have exactly what my parents have right now or even better" even though they really don't.

 

My husband owns a wedding videography business and almost every couple he has shot for or is going to shoot for are in the process of buying a house and a potential costumer finally told him no because they had to go and buy a house and then buy $10,000 worth of new furniture for the house. What?????

 

I would love to own our own home and at 30 I am tired of paying someone else to rent this place. But financially we are trying to be smart and pay off some more debt before we even begin to consider buying ahome. And yes, I'd love to have new matching furniture but at the end of my life- will it matter if my couch matched my chair matched my wall decor, matched my carpet? Nope. Not a bit. Bigger picture here people.

 

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

[Stacy in NJ]

Just because their home costs 400k and is 3000sf doesn't mean they have any debt. It also doesn't mean they've sacrificed there family life for their careers.

 

Here's a shocking piece of information: some folks have careers that enable them to earn lots of money, and they can easily afford the homes they purchase. That doesn't make them good people; It also doesn't make them bad or "spoiled" people either. It just makes them people with lots of money.

[kah]

Hmm.. I'm thinking about this, still. (My other choices are laundry and cleaning, LOL!)

 

I do think sometimes it makes sense to stretch your budget when you're young, if you really expect to stay put somewhere for quite a few years. If you expect to want/need a fairly big house pretty soon, it may be cheaper to get it now, rather than closing and moving costs several times along the way to a big house.

[Carrie12345]

I don't see what the problem is. Some people can afford the best (or what they feel is the best). As long as they're not taking from me, more power to 'em!

[springmama]

Our house is worth about $400,000 and we are 34 years old and have been here 5 years. I haven't worked since 2002 when I was a realtor for only a year before giving birth to dd2. My husband has been planning for his future since he was a small child (he's an Alex P Keaton type) and has his MBA in Finance and has a well paying job. Not only does he have a great job but we are really good at managing money. We clip coupons, shop the thrift store and enjoy free or really cheap entertainment.

 

Our first house was purchased for only 112K and when we sold it to move here to AL, we had enough profit that we were able to put down a large downpayment. Since taxes are lower here, our mortgage on this house is almost the same as the mortgage on our first house, the one we purchased for 112K almost 10 years ago.

 

In our neighborhood, most homes are priced 400K up to about a million, and I'm fairly certain that there are only a handful of single family homes. We are not like the others here...no landscapers, no maids, no new cars....

 

We bough our home because we knew we'd have more kids, LOVED the unique neighborhood we are in (very woodsy with super large wooded lots) and wanted to live in a place that we enjoy.

 

No sense of entitlement in our family at all....well, unless you count the current attitude of our teenager, lol! I came from a very poor background and for awhile was on welfare and worked my behind off to go to school and support my dd before my prince charming came along and swept me off my feet. DH worked super hard getting his education and we both work hard to keep this house running.

[Danestress]

I guess if you go into a profitable career you might make enough money as a banker or lawyer or doctor or business owner to buy a house like that. Some people choose careers that are more profitable than others. When I was 30, I was pretty happy with 3 kids and in 900 feet of military base housing. But it doesn't bother me at all that someone else has greater earning power and enjoys it.

 

I've never watched HGTV so maybe I am missing something, but while I am the type would would rather live with counters I hate than get all the decisions and phone calls made to change them (to say nothing of the money) it really doesn't bother me that someone else does care.

 

Not everyone with more money than me is living beyond their means. Many of them just make a lot more money. I have a lot of friends who are homeschooling Moms and devoted Christians who live in wonderful, expensive homes because they have husbands with jobs that allow that. I have a nice home myself now, but not the maids and lawn care that many of my neighbors have. If it bothered me, I would move, but it doesn't bother me to see people who have a nicer lifestyle than I do.

[CatMomof3]

A real annoyance to me is the women who need the entire walk-in closet for their clothing and proceed to tell their husbands that they can use the closet in the "other" room for their clothing. Sheesh. That's a thorn in my side. Good grief!

 

:iagree:

[TwinMominTX]

But maybe you didn't see the other 27 minutes of footage that didn't make it to air where her husband mentions that her car will have to sit in the driveway so that he can fill the garage with his tools.

 

You need to be careful making judgements about something that is edited by someone else who has vested interest AND purpose for what they put into the 30 minute television program.

[Dirtroad]

Everyone says not to make judgements, but that is ENTIRELY what those shows are about.... judging you need a better house, judging you are not doing good b/c you can't buy one at 30..... judging women need more space for shoes or are selfish for needing the entire closet.... husbands have too many toys for garage & cars OR are too lazy to unpack the final boxes.... judging your bathroom isn't good enought b/c toilets are cast in gold...GAG!

 

It is all about making you want more & using THINGS to satisfy coms longing or craving...... and jumping in your car & driving down to Lowes or other store.... or calling a contractor.

 

It is annoying... whether they can afford it or not. I see them using these buyers to "hold over you head" to get you to want more.

[TwinMominTX]

These shows are about selling advertising and making money.

[elegantlion]

These shows are about selling advertising and making money.

 

I started getting annoyed with HGTV when I found out that the majority of "Dream Home" winners can not even afford to own the home. They have to sell because of how expensively they were built and by the time you pay taxes on the winnings and yearly property taxes you'd have to have more than a six figure income to continue living there.

 

Why not build three or four more moderate homes and give them away so people could afford to actually live in them.

 

I applaud all of you that were focused and planned well and worked hard at a young age to afford a decent home. Seriously, that's a great accomplishment.

[Ginevra]

:seeya: Hellooo?! Another "big, nice house when I was still wet-behind-the-ears" homeowner, here! I do just want to inject and agree with the few mentions sprinkled into this thread that not everyone living in a beautiful, big, nice, new home in early marriage is: 1)in debt/house poor; 2) spoiled; 3) entitled; 4) living for career.

 

My dh bought a lot when most of his friends were furnishing their first apartment. He built 75% of our first house with his own hands (framing, tile, flooring, roofing, siding, gutters, painting, trim, plumbing, electrical, hvac). We moved into that 3200 sq. ft. house one year after we were married. Most of the rooms lacked furniture and we left off many roughed-in details for years. We slowly furnished the house, often with second-hand things, sometimes with give-aways. We lucked out when the housing boom hit and were able to sell our house for five times what we owed.

 

So, our current/second house, we were able to build with no debt. :001_smile:

 

That said, clearly there are "spoiled-brat" types who buy homes they cannot afford and are then stuck having to earn dual incomes to keep it going. I'm just saying that having a nice house does not mean someone is such. I'm sensitive about this because some jealous people have implied that our nice house came to us because we are overdebted or because dh was given things by his parents, but nothing could be further from the truth.

[eternalknot]

I come from a family that was very comfortable, financially. My parents offered each of us cash for our weddings - we could use it for the wedding, car, down payment, ... however and on whatever we chose. This is pretty common in my culture, especially among my friends/generation and regardless of the family's income. They give what they can, however small or large. But also common in my culture is for kids to continue living at home or with family until they marry; it almost seems like this gives a financial head start to a newlywed.

 

My husband was stationed overseas when we married. I lived with family, but we still collected housing money. Because I lived in an expensive city, we got very close to the max payout. We saved it separately for the year we lived apart; when he came back to the States, we used his VA loan to get a house without a down payment. We used the prior year's BAH to pay cash for two fourplexes near his stateside base. The income from our fourplexes paid for the fourplexes plus half of the mortgage for the house we lived in (and we were priced on the lower end because we didn't want to rip of Joes the way so many other landlords did). We continued to invest in real estate, and now own several properties. I live in a very modest condo of 1000 sq ft, with white appliances; he lives in a slightly smaller condo, also with white appliances ::grin::. Our tenants pay our bills, so we're happy to let them have the larger homes and fancier upgrades!

[eternalknot]

I have also come to the conclusion that even if we were rich, I would want to upgrade our house, but not with the kind from HGTV:) I would want a house that could accomadate our extended family with a bigger yard:)

 

That's me, too :D

 

I live in a small town that has lots of Joneses trying to keep up with one another. It's amusing and sad, all at once. McMansions going up left and right, taking up whole acres of land and leaving little (if any) functional yardspace. And that's cool, if that's what those folks want ...

 

... but man. I don't get the whole thing about wanting to fit the cookie cutter mold. I have no desire for my home to look like I bought everything from pages 20-22 of the Pottery Barn or Restoration Hardware catalogs. I definitely don't want my kitchen to be one of a 1000 "just like it" from the granite countertops to the stainless appliances. If it's an upgrade that would make my realtor happy, I tend to steer clear of it LOL. Fortunately I send enough business her way that she tolerates my eclectic fits and nonconforming nature!

[fivetails]

I've never seen the show, but if I did and watched a couple getting a "3000+ sq ft home" for 400K, I'd be looking like this - :001_huh:

 

...cuz you'd be lucky to get a trailer & patch of grass for that $ here. :tongue_smilie:

[Kathy in MD]

HGTV also have shows that show you how to decorate a room or house on relatively little money. These are the Shows I like best. Such as sewing towels together to make a duvet cover for an old quilt, or taking b&w photos of Roman style statues, blowing them up, and framing them with cheap frames for a roman themed room. Or painting a "frame" around a picture to make appear larger and better fil the space.

 

I've gotten some neat ideas if I oly get around to using them:tongue_smilie: