irizarry4 Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 Ds 10 and dd 7. I'm needing ideas and examples of what you have your dc do around the house at those ages. How do chores get enforced? Rewards? Consequences? You see, I had never required chores before. We just pulled them out of PS. But when they were in PS, they came home at 3pm, and I spent most of the afternoon doing homework with them, until it was time for dinner, then bedtime (or basketball practice, or AWANA, or our Bible study). So adding chores to their load seemed overkill. But now that I am hs'ing, and still need to tend to our business, I need them to pick up some of the slack! :tongue_smilie: Help, please!!! :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 I just ordered Children's Miracle Music. I am hoping it helps... all of us! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irizarry4 Posted June 24, 2009 Author Share Posted June 24, 2009 Looks interesting. I'm thinking I would have to replay the acts of kindness several times, though..... ha, ha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsMe Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 I used the choreganizer from CBD. I use a certain amount of (poker) chips for every chore. Brushing your teeth is one chip, but reading gets 3 chips. The things she hates I gave her more chips as a reward. Then when she has enough chips, certain items, places or rewards (like tv time) cost so many chips. The harder she works the better the reward. Let me say that most chore charts are the same. I mean you can make your own however you want to work it. It's what is the chore worth and what do you get for it is what is the hardest to plan or decide value. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaurieinCA Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 DS, 11 - Monday: clean up dog waste in yard, take out recyclables (elderly neighbor's, too; Tuesday: bring in recyclable container (neighbor's, too), clean room and playroom; Wednesday: none; Thursday: water plants; Friday: none. DS, 9 - Monday: water plants, take out trash cans (elderly neighbor's, too); Tuesday: bring in trash cans (neighbor's, too), put laundry away; Wednesay: none; Thursday: clean up dog waste; Friday: none If the boys practice all their music (they each play two instruments), get their schoolwork and chores done, and don't have "3 strikes" for poor behavior that day, they earn $1 each weekday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ginevra Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 Ds 10 and dd 7. I'm needing ideas and examples of what you have your dc do around the house at those ages. How do chores get enforced? Rewards? Consequences? Well, my children are 12 and 9 (and 4.5, but he has few chores) and here are examples of their chores: Both * Dust Stations (Stations are i.e., Living Room, all windowsills, your bedroom, hall) * Vacuum one floor of the house (dd12 all upstairs, ds9 all downstairs) *Make beds each morning, put away clean clothes, do part of the dinner cleanup. dd12 * Make dinner one night a week. I assist if necessary, but she manages it wholly. She escapes clean up duty the night she cooks. * Clean her bathroom (I expect everything to be cleaned.) * Sweep and mop Dining Room * Groom the dog * Clean the powder room ds9 * Vacuum cars and throw out trash * Clean cabinet fronts in kitchen * Empty trash * Scoop cat box (Okay, he despises this job and so I gave up.) * Clean boys bathroom (I don't expect him to clean tub or mirrors.) * Make a dessert with me (brownies, cookies...working towards the day when he is also making a full meal one night a week.) They have usually one of these weekly chores per weekday and their daily chores, obviously, daily. I don't give rewards. These are the jobs we all need to do to keep the family running. I have paid them before for extra-hard jobs when they specifically want to earn money. I don't give punishments. I put the job on their plan books. Before the day is out, I will ask if they have done it. If not, they will be sent to do it. It has happened that the job didn't get done, but it's not a habitual occurrence. If they do a job that exhibits gross negligence (not simply immaturity), they will do it again, with my "help" (or lording over them, whichever description you prefer). This has only happened perhaps twice each. The one time I remember a lot of eye-rolling from dd about doing her job; I think she was 6. I just had a heart-to-heart talk with her about how we all need to help the family run smoothly and what would happen if I failed to wash clothes because I didn't feel like it? Or Daddy didn't go to work because he didn't feel like it? That really was the only time I needed to address a bad attitude towards jobs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 Looks interesting. I'm thinking I would have to replay the acts of kindness several times, though..... ha, ha I actually think I will have to. :D I am definitely tweaking after it gets here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CookieMonster Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 I was gonna type my ideas out, but then I remembered this blog post. I think it does just fine. Choreganizers (btw, I have two younger brothers aged 9 and 7 so I hear from my step-mother regularly about how they're doing around the house. :)) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iwka Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 I use this: http://www.chorebuster.net/Default.aspx If you want smth fancy for the kids: http://www.handipoints.com/index.php?kw=g.us.content.household%20chores&landing= Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 Mine LOVE My Reward Board. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 The best time I did chores for the kids, I took the calendar with all of the chores that I should do (Motivated Moms??) and divided them up according to which child was best suited. This worked REALLY well. My husband did cute chore charts, separating their chores into "dailies" and "weeklies". I felt no guilt, as their are always extra chores for the mom. And, don't forget having kids help with cooking dinner and helping to clean up. When our dishwasher broke, and we had to do all the dishes by hand, I started helping to do dishes, and it was actually sweet to have that time with my daughter. Carrie:-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 The best time I did chores for the kids, I took the calendar with all of the chores that I should do (Motivated Moms??) and divided them up according to which child was best suited. How many and what ages of children? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 I did this for my kids when they were (2, 8,11,14) and we had the older two half time. SO, to be exact, I split all the big chores up for them over their weeks here.(They are here two weeks and gone two.) I felt a bit guilty, until I talked myself out of it. It really worked out great. My daughter that is here almost all of the time had most of the constants. She always took all the trash out. etc. If they were here all the time, it would still work out perfectly. Now, though, they switch every two weeks. Gotta get those chores out again for the summer. Now, I just write all the chores I want done on the white board. My rule is to start with common areas and then they need to do their personal chores. I expect a lot of chores/help. Oh well...it's what I need. My 17 year old didn't get a job, and I told her that during her time here, she'd need to work like a 40 hour week here...and she didn't even try for a job.(I thought that would be incentive to go get a job!) SO, I'm assuming that I'll be getting lots of help this summer. I have to admit...I had a job and was out by the time I was an early teen. No help for my mom. (Sorry mom!) Carrie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
urban mama Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 I use this:http://www.chorebuster.net/Default.aspx How fun! I love it! The kids are going to love the random assignment of chores and I love that it allows me to distribute the chores based on the appropriate work load! Thanks for the link! (now I have to stop thinking up chores and go to bed!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irizarry4 Posted June 24, 2009 Author Share Posted June 24, 2009 How fun! I love it! The kids are going to love the random assignment of chores and I love that it allows me to distribute the chores based on the appropriate work load! Thanks for the link! (now I have to stop thinking up chores and go to bed!) I especially like one of their 'preset chores' which reads: "Earn all the money":lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnandtinagilbert Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 With the exception of the 7yo only washing dishes once per week, the following chores are equally distributed amongst the gang 7 days per week: 1. vacuum living room and rugs 2. sweep kitchen, dining room, front/back doorways, bathrooms 3. dogs: brush, clean waste, feed 4. bathroom tidy, spray, clean, wipe 5. wash dishes, wipe down kitchen and table 6. put away food dry and put away dishes, clear table after meals 7. trash 8. vacuum boys/girls room (share via gender) Every Sat. am they have a list of items to dust in bedrooms and they all have to change sheets and hand comforters on the clothes line for air. The boys do lawn and outside work, the girls stay in and help me with inside cleaning. They fold and put away their own laundry when I wash (about every other day) Weekly Zones: There are 5 zones. We spend 15 min. per day on specific items in each zone 1. over all zone: wash walls; doors; baseboards; window sills; beds; desks/games 2. kitchen: cabinets inside; cabinets outside; walls; chairs; table; fridge, chopping block 3. bookshelves and cubbies: library/den; library/den; hall bookshelves; cubbies; cubbies; laundry room 4. variety: bathroom; bathroom; entertainment centers; closets; closets; drawers 5. every day, outside yard duties that we don't regularly get to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katiebug_1976 Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 I have been struggling with the chore thing a lot lately, but I was given some really good suggestions when I posted my question a couple days ago. I have divided the meal thie chores up between my 4 oldest (13, 12, 9 & 6) so everyone has a job right after meal time. Then we have a "morning chore time" not long after breakfast. Everyone has a job like tidy living room, gather dirty laundry, tidy & wipe down bathroom etc. Then to tame the whining and attitude issues we have, I have tweaked a suggestion I received. I created "The Extra Job Jar." In this jar I placed all the extra jobs like sweep & mop kitchen floor, sort & organize toy boxes, clean out & vacum van, all the things that never seem to get done. I also listed the names of my keds that are old enough to do each job, so if my 6yo pulls out a job, her name has to be on it or she draws again until she finds an age appropriate job. Anyway, every time they whine, complain, argue, disobey, or just have a bad attitude etc. they have to pull a job out of the jar. We just started this today, so I don't know the long term effects yet, but I am excited. My house will sparkle by the end of the week, I'm sure. And hopefully not long after that, the attitudes will be tamed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoyfulMama Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 I don't give rewards. These are the jobs we all need to do to keep the family running. I have paid them before for extra-hard jobs when they specifically want to earn money. I don't give punishments. I put the job on their plan books. Before the day is out, I will ask if they have done it. If not, they will be sent to do it. It has happened that the job didn't get done, but it's not a habitual occurrence. If they do a job that exhibits gross negligence (not simply immaturity), they will do it again, with my "help" (or lording over them, whichever description you prefer). This has only happened perhaps twice each. :iagree:I don't get a reward for my chores, other than a clean house, and I think this needs to be the reward for them as well. If I did a reward, I'd have to be good at carrying out that reward. If I slip on the reward, it allows them to slip on their responsibilites. So I have a chore chart which lists their daily responsibilities (a place for them to go to see what they need to do, and a place to check it off). I created it on excel, used pics to identify chores for the littles (trash can, bed, etc) for the non-readers. I laminated it, and use a wipe-off marker for check marks. We don't check mark every day, since they don't always need the visual reminder for their chores. 8yo: feed/water cats, make bed/clean room, vacuum steps (or) sweep two bathrooms out), help with laundry, dinner cleanup, and end of day clenaup 4yo: make bed/clean room, trash cans, sweep floors/dust, help with laundry, set table for dinner, end of day cleanup 3yo: make bed/clean room, trash cans, sweep floors, dust, end of day cleanup (obviously these are not independent for her!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WiseOwlKnits Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 DD: brush hair, get dressed, make bed, set table for dinner, pick up toys, take bath, feed fish, brush teeth, hang up/put away her clothes after they are folded DS: pick up toys, make bed I don't reward kids for doing their chores. Our philosophy is that we all do certain things that make our family run more smoothly. And for DS and DD, it's only fair that they help out with making it run smoothly if they want the benefits of a family that runs smoothly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostSurprise Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 10 year old~put away silverware, sweep kitchen, vacuum living room, clean toilet, pick up own things 8 year old~unload dishwasher, feet/water cats, take out compost, take out recycling, pick up own things 6 year old~set table, clear table, feed/water dog, collect trashcans/bring back empty trash barrel, pick up own things 4 year old~clean windows and mirrors, wipe out bathroom sink, pick up own things On weekends I take on dishwashing tasks and we ignore floor cleaning tasks and all boys work on cleaning their rooms. Every 4-6 months we redistribute tasks. Everyone gets to chose one of their chores, occasionally more depending on what's popular (or unpopular). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peggy in Va Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 I use this:http://www.chorebuster.net/Default.aspx I was reading this thread just to see what others were doing and checked this out. This is just too fun. I have just spent the past hour or so making up chores. I especially love the "earn all the money", "pay bills", and "random act of kindness". I seriously hope that the last one will land on youngest ds side more often than not.:) Thanks so much for sharing this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tree House Academy Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 I just ordered Managers of their Chores after great successes with Managers of their homes. I will share when I get everything together. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irizarry4 Posted June 24, 2009 Author Share Posted June 24, 2009 Ladies, thanks so much for all your insight. I agree wholeheartedly that chores do not need a reward. I think when I think about "reward" I am primarily thinking of the value we all try to teach our children. We must do what we MUST do first, to be able to enjoy time doing what we WANT to do. So in the last few weeks, I have rewarded tidy rooms, spontaneous table-clearing, unsolicited independent breakfast-making, and such, with extra playtime or PBS-TV time. As I have been reading all your posts, the one thing that cracks me up is this. Once I have my chore program running, my children will be better at their chores than my husband is. (Can the man not see that there are 2 different size forks, and they don't go in the same space??) :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HFClassicalAcademy Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 I blogged about chores and have links and pictures. I reviewed 2 different chore systems and finally went with Managers of Their Chores. You can see these here. HTH!! Liz in NC Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoyfulMama Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 As I have been reading all your posts, the one thing that cracks me up is this. Once I have my chore program running, my children will be better at their chores than my husband is. (Can the man not see that there are 2 different size forks, and they don't go in the same space??) :lol: Yes... a bonus, if you will. My DH will never ever put his dirty clothes anywhere other than the floor. (But he is starting to make the bed!) :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsMe Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 Yes... a bonus, if you will. My DH will never ever put his dirty clothes anywhere other than the floor. (But he is starting to make the bed!) Oh my gosh! I don't want my dh to make my bed. I've seen the end result. :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom-ninja. Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 Subbing for later. Can't read now. Bed time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 We got the Miracle Music in the mail today. We read the directions together and DD is very excited to start. She wanted to listen today and start tomorrow. Subbing for later. Can't read now. Bed time. I just have to say that I always read your screen name as Kleenex. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandKsmama Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 I have a chart I made out of 1/2 a poster board. There are 7 pockets - 2 for each kid (one "to-do" and one "done"), and then one for the extra cards. I made 3x5 cards with all the chores I want done each day on them. When I started, I made a list of everything around the house I wanted done, and categorized it by daily chores, weekly, monthly, etc. It just worked out that there are 9 daily chores (so 3 for each kid), and 15 weekly ones (so each kid gets one weekly chore every day). The monthly ones, I just dole out as needed, cuz there are only a few of those. Oh, and every day, each kid has a "morning routine" card, which means make up bed, teeth and hair, clothes picked up and put away. SO, every day, each kid has 5 chores to do. I keep track of how many they do each day - at the end of the week, they get paid based on how many out of 25 they did. (and they DO have to do them all, but if they don't do one on the day they are supposed to, they don't get paid for it) Oldest dd(13) gets a potential $6/week, Ds (8) gets $4, and Dd#2 (5) gets $2. My daily chores are Morning routine, unload dishwasher, load dishwasher, set table, clear table, sweep dining room/kitchen, meal helper, take out trash, sweep inside steps, fold 1 load laundry. My weekly chores are broken down by rooms - Monday's chores are bedrooms (dust, vacuum) and sweep the outside steps (cuz I needed a 3rd one LOL); Tuesday's are bathrooms (I have 3 bathrooms, so each kid cleans one); Wednesday's are living room/dining room (dust, vacuum) and clean microwave; Thursday is kitchen (mop kitchen floor, wipe down fronts of cabinets and fridge) and clean out van; Friday is downstairs, which is den and guest room (dust, vacuum), and windex all mirrors. Saturdays are not "paid" days in our house - we all just do whatever most needs to be done; Saturday is also the day that I change all the sheets (as needed), and dust the fans - those 2 are "mom chores" LOL. Hope this makes some sense! It's the first chore system that has ever worked in our house! Amanda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoyfulMama Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 Oh my gosh! I don't want my dh to make my bed. I've seen the end result. :blink: :lol: My DH works nights, so when I make the bed in the morning it only lasts for about an hour. He tended to just hop out of bed later in the day, leaving the bed in a heap. So at some time in the evening I would remake the bed again - it is so much nicer to get into a made bed! :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brownie Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 If you don't reward for chores completed...how do you get them to complete them without a lot of nagging and hovering? My boys don't have to do much and will do maybe 3 of 4 on any given day with one reminder and no complaining, but will inevitably find something to complain about the 4th. At that point what would you do? And what if you realize later in the day the bed didn't get made (like at bedtime)? Brownie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irizarry4 Posted June 26, 2009 Author Share Posted June 26, 2009 I think the consensus is that chores have to be done, and they do not give money or other such 'rewards' for completing them. But I think any job well done always has a 'reward', be it satisfaction, OR the chance to do things you WANT to do. Maybe it's more of a consequence-avoidance. Without nagging or hovering, when dc come ask if they can play video games, watch TV, play Legos, go outside, go to Johnny's house, the question from you is: "did you finish your chores?" For bed-making, I would ask at breakfast. Anybody who hasn't made their bed has to go back to make it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 If you don't reward for chores completed...how do you get them to complete them without a lot of nagging and hovering? My boys don't have to do much and will do maybe 3 of 4 on any given day with one reminder and no complaining, but will inevitably find something to complain about the 4th. At that point what would you do? And what if you realize later in the day the bed didn't get made (like at bedtime)? Brownie With Children's Miracle Music, the reward is time spent with loved ones. I see this as a natural consequence. When one person has help with the work, they have more time to spend with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gr8tcook Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 We sat everybody down and gave them a list of about 50 things they get to do that is fun like: paint with watercolors, ride thier bike, go swimming, go the movies, rent a movie, play video games, color,play legos...just normal everyday stuff that they like to do. We explained that these are privlidges and no one can have privlidge without responsability. Daddy and I promised to say "yes" to these things all the time as long as 2 things happened...they had taken care of thier responsabilities and they clean up after themselves. So far only one of the 4 has regularly been denied fun because he hasn't done the "have tos" everybody is flush with excitement that the can choose thier own "get tos". Plus dh and I compiled a list of jobs they can get paid for if they are finished with their everyday jobs. We listed the name and all the steps to do the job and priced it according to difficulty. ex:mowing the lawn is $7.00 a week but dusting the baseboard's is only $1.00 per room. Now everyone has pocket money and feels "grown up" without mom hovering or nagging. If they don't do it they forfiet their freedom to choose activities. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom-ninja. Posted June 29, 2009 Share Posted June 29, 2009 With Children's Miracle Music, the reward is time spent with loved ones. I see this as a natural consequence. When one person has help with the work, they have more time to spend with you. I just ordered Managers of their Chores after great successes with Managers of their homes. I will share when I get everything together. :) Let us know how these work for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzannah Posted June 29, 2009 Share Posted June 29, 2009 (edited) I've tried chore charts in the school notebooks, I've tried chore charts on the wall, I've tried sticker charts, tickets, rewards, threats of punishment if chores aren't done and just expecting them to be done. The main drawback to all of them is that I have to remind them to do it, or remember the tickets, or remember to punish them...but the chores still need to be done, so if they happen to fall asleep before I realize that the garbage hasn't been taken out, I still have to do it. Now there is only one chore for each of them each day (not including basic hygiene, picking up after themselves and dog care.) There is a chart, but since there is only one thing to remember each day we only used it for the first week or two. DS empty downstairs trash* clean bathroom** straighten videos, DVDs, Xbox games/controllers empty downstairs trash* do laundry, straighten room take all belongings from other parts of the house to room straighten school supplies DD empty upstairs trash* clean bathroom** do laundry/straighten room empty upstairs trash* vacuum stairs take all belongings from other parts of the house to room sweep kitchen/foyer * Trash pick-up is twice a week. **The kids used to each clean a bathroom, DD did the powder room and DS did the upstairs bathroom that they share. One day DS said he didn't think it was fair that DD had a smaller amount of work so they switched for a little while, but for some reason that didn't work out. Neither one EVER remembered to clean either bathroom. So now I have them both clean the upstairs bathroom. I allowed for imperfections when they worked alone, but now they have a very high standard. There is a checklist on the wall and they take turns being the "cleaner" and the "supervisor." The supervisor's job is to help the cleaner remember to do each thing, go get cleaning supplies, toilet paper, etc if they are out, and generally be supportive. Not only do I hope to get a sparkling bathroom out of this each week, but I'm trying to promote a spirit of teamwork. If one is too bossy or unhelpful one week, they may find the tables turned the following week. I think we've been using this particular system for about two months and so far this arrangement has worked surprisingly well. I realize some of these chores seem a bit small (such as vacuuming stairs and straightening videos,) but they are the things I am routinely unable to get to but very annoyed by. HTH Oh, just wanted to add what has worked for two friends. Friend with 3 kids ages 8-13 made a comprehensive list of everything she (& DH) did to maintain the house. She sat the kids down and showed it too them, then asked if they thought it was fair for her to do all of those things when there are 5 people in the house. The kids agreed that it wasn't fair, so she (I believe in advance) divided her chore list among them all. Naturally there are some things she and DH must do themselves, so they are fixed, but the kids' chores are assigned in 3-month blocks. In three months they rotate chore lists so no one is stuck doing the same chores forever. Another friend had trouble getting kids to remember to do things, primarily caring for the pets. Her rule is they don't eat until the dogs eat. I'm sure it works great for things such as making beds or other must-be-done-first-thing chores as well. Edited June 29, 2009 by Suzannah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom31257 Posted June 29, 2009 Share Posted June 29, 2009 I don't know if someone has suggested this, but I found this recently. I'm still trying to work out what I want done and what the rewards will be. I've tried things in the past, but have been just having them do what I ask. We'll see how this goes. http://www.handipoints.com/howitworks.php?kw=&landing= Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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